The UBT Takes on Aimee

bimboThe other day, Sweetz posted that the Other Woman sent her an email and asked that we decode it for her. By request, I will throw it into the jaws of the Universal Bullshit Translator and see what happens.

The letter:

Dear Sweetz,

When you asked me to keep away from your husband for the next year to see if God would or could do anything to bring healing to your marriage, well, I could not. Why? Because you told me that I was not the first “interest” he had, and “probably would not be the last”. You said that if his interest were not in me, then it would have been in someone else. Well, I suppose I still want to be that “someone else”. Your husband reminds me of my father who passed away just a year ago. I know that I am vulnerable, and I know that your husband simply sees me as someone exciting and likely in a sexual way. So I have no delusions of grandeur for a lasting future with him. I am twenty five years his junior and cannot imagine caring for him in his old age. I have no husband (divorced) and want a secure life someday with someone my own age.

You said that he seems to be “never satisfied”, and that he had been unfaithful in his previous marriage too. So I suppose that this means that I should expect to experience the same kind of waxing and waning from him also in due time. But I am willing to enjoy the relationship in spite of the risks and for however long it lasts. I have resisted seeing him for these last three months at your request, but met up with him recently for a brief visit at a pizza take out. I surprised him after he closed his store, and he was more than willing to meet with me. This indicates that he has not put me out of his mind and that it was really YOU that wanted me to go away. If you had not figured us out, we would still be in our friendship.

Your husband speaks VERY highly of you, which indicates that he does not intend to divorce you, but simply wants a larger variety of relationships. If this is something that you can live with, then I would advise it because he is otherwise a very kind and generous man from what I can tell. I would hate to see him get tossed and lose so much of what he has at his age. He seems to love the Lord and believes that he will be disciplined appropriately if and when that time arrives. He is a gambler I take it?

He told me that all your children are grown and gone, you have a nice home, you each have your own businesses and apparently get along great as long as you do not mention the subject of other women. He is just bored with the same o’ same o’. I would advise not rocking the boat because like you said, if it were not me he is pursuing, it could be someone far more ruthless and possessive. I also advise that you do not make his life miserable. This will only result in making me appear suddenly more desirable to him other than as “just a friendship”. He really does not fit my idea of someone permanent . Keep what you have, look the other way, and let God be the Judge.

You might be tempted to think of me as a bit sleazy, and the way I am handling the loss of my father by taking comfort in your husband, I suppose this gives the appearance of that. I do not care. You can have him back after I feel whole again. If you no longer want him, just remember that it was HE that pursued me and offered himself for no other reason than his desire for excitement and variety. He knows that I am bereaved and attracted to his resemblance of my father and is willing to take full advantage of that. So your issue will not be resolved anyway long after I am gone.

This speaks of nothing about your qualities as a person, but I imagine that your husband could not have picked anyone better to have married. I was shocked when I finally met you, you are truly beautiful and kind. I instantly could tell that you “knew” that he and I had already developed a relationship. Yet, you were gracious to me nevertheless. Hold on to your virtues and do not let this destroy the person that he truly admires and what you have.

Aimee

The UBT translation:

When you asked me to keep away from your husband for the next year to see if God would or could do anything to bring healing to your marriage, well, I could not.

I will not. (Aka “You’re Not The Boss of Me.”)

Why? Because you told me that I was not the first “interest” he had, and “probably would not be the last”. You said that if his interest were not in me, then it would have been in someone else. Well, I suppose I still want to be that “someone else”. Your husband reminds me of my father who passed away just a year ago.

I fuck people who remind me of my father. Yes, I’m just creepy like that.

I know that I am vulnerable, and I know that your husband simply sees me as someone exciting and likely in a sexual way. So I have no delusions of grandeur for a lasting future with him. I am twenty five years his junior and cannot imagine caring for him in his old age. I have no husband (divorced) and want a secure life someday with someone my own age.

He’s just a plaything. You can have him back when I’m finished.

I really probably have no lasting future with anyone. I’m divorced at 25 and screwing a married man who reminds me of my father. I. Have. Issues.

You said that he seems to be “never satisfied”, and that he had been unfaithful in his previous marriage too. So I suppose that this means that I should expect to experience the same kind of waxing and waning from him also in due time. But I am willing to enjoy the relationship in spite of the risks and for however long it lasts.

By “waxing and waning” I mean he will seek kibbles elsewhere. I’m okay with that. I have zero standards. None at all. Zip.

I have resisted seeing him for these last three months at your request, but met up with him recently for a brief visit at a pizza take out. I surprised him after he closed his store, and he was more than willing to meet with me. This indicates that he has not put me out of his mind and that it was really YOU that wanted me to go away. If you had not figured us out, we would still be in our friendship.

I am rather dim. YOU requested I not see him! (first sentence) THEN (third sentence) I discovered that it was YOU who wanted me to go away! I HAVE CONNECTED THE DOTS Sweetz!

You figured us out. And I have just figured out that you don’t want me to see him. But I saw him anyway. Because you’re not the boss of me. I can be friends with anyone I want to be. Like men who remind me of my father. In that fanciable, fuckable, fatherly way.

Your husband speaks VERY highly of you, which indicates that he does not intend to divorce you, but simply wants a larger variety of relationships.

You should be grateful. He just bangs me and then buys me pizza.

If this is something that you can live with, then I would advise it because he is otherwise a very kind and generous man from what I can tell.

You should listen to me. I’m 25, divorced, a woman of the world.  Nuggets of wisdom spring forth like from the head of Zeus. I’m like Athena, if Athena was the Goddess of Cluelessness and Chutzpah.

I would hate to see him get tossed and lose so much of what he has at his age. He seems to love the Lord and believes that he will be disciplined appropriately if and when that time arrives. He is a gambler I take it?

Please don’t divorce him. He’s got a lot more money to date me if you stay married. I need a lot of pizza to be happy.

Pay no attention to his whoring and gambling. Leave it to God. Someone needs a steady job here so he can afford me.

He told me that all your children are grown and gone, you have a nice home, you each have your own businesses and apparently get along great as long as you do not mention the subject of other women. He is just bored with the same o’ same o’. I would advise not rocking the boat because like you said, if it were not me he is pursuing, it could be someone far more ruthless and possessive.

You could do worse for Other Women! I’m, like, benevolent. I said I’d give him back and maybe find someone age appropriate. Some day. Meanwhile, while he’s still got money to spend on me, don’t divorce him. That’s my advice. Does that sound ruthless or possessive?

I also advise that you do not make his life miserable.

I’m full of advice! Do you want to hit me with a brick yet? 🙂

This will only result in making me appear suddenly more desirable to him other than as “just a friendship”. He really does not fit my idea of someone permanent . Keep what you have, look the other way, and let God be the Judge.

Don’t make him miserable, because then he might CHEAT. Oh hang on, he’s already cheating on you. Ergo you must make him miserable. Hmmm. If you quit doing that…? Shit. I’m confused. Anyway, I’m sure this is somehow your fault, but let’s make of fuck-up of things and leave it to Jesus!

You might be tempted to think of me as a bit sleazy,

Oh never.

and the way I am handling the loss of my father by taking comfort in your husband, I suppose this gives the appearance of that.

No, it gives the appearance of mental illness that goes far beyond mere sleaziness.

(UBT aside: You take comfort in fucking men who remind you of your dead father. I shudder to think what would happen if you lost a family pet.)

I do not care. You can have him back after I feel whole again. If you no longer want him, just remember that it was HE that pursued me and offered himself for no other reason than his desire for excitement and variety. He knows that I am bereaved and attracted to his resemblance of my father and is willing to take full advantage of that. So your issue will not be resolved anyway long after I am gone.

I’m a poor sausage who is being taking advantage of! But I do not care. He pursued me!

This speaks of nothing about your qualities as a person, but I imagine that your husband could not have picked anyone better to have married. I was shocked when I finally met you, you are truly beautiful and kind. I instantly could tell that you “knew” that he and I had already developed a relationship. Yet, you were gracious to me nevertheless. Hold on to your virtues and do not let this destroy the person that he truly admires and what you have.

Aimee

You’re a good chump. Hold on to your virtuous chumpiness — you know, that person who doesn’t make him miserable and let’s him eat cake! He admires cake. Don’t destroy cake.

Aimee

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Lelibelle
Lelibelle
9 years ago

Oh thanks for making me laugh out! Love the family pet comment

overcomer
overcomer
9 years ago
Reply to  Lelibelle

I just loved “I have connected the dots” , that was a belly laugh for me…thanks CL!

Anonymous Coward
Anonymous Coward
9 years ago
Reply to  Lelibelle

I got a smile out of that one.

Lucky
Lucky
9 years ago

Reading this letter hurt my head. Cannot believe you didn’t break the UBT on this literary nugget!!!

Lisa
Lisa
9 years ago

“I shudder to think what would happen if you lost a family pet.” OMG, CL, I love you!

mgirontree
mgirontree
9 years ago
Reply to  Lisa

You are soooo funny, LISA. I am laughing so hard!!!!!

LadyStrange
LadyStrange
9 years ago

I wonder if he held a gun to her head and made her write that to his wife? I can’t belive someone would be that stupid to write the wife an email like that. But then again, there are very stupid people out there…. I think you are right on the nose with the UBT: “You should listen to me. I’m 25, divorced, a woman of the world. Nuggets of wisdom spring forth like from the head of Zeus. I’m like Athena, if Athena was the Goddess of Cluelessness and Chutzpah.” LMAO!

Jen
Jen
9 years ago
Reply to  LadyStrange

I tend to write some stupid things when I’m drunk. Regrettably on Facebook. But I delete them within minutes most of the time and I’m not an other woman.

Lina
Lina
9 years ago

What a sick nasty little b***h she is. She’ll never be “whole”.

Divorce Minister
Divorce Minister
9 years ago
Reply to  Lina

Therapy? No. Volunteering? No. Physical exercise? No. Journaling? No. Support grief groups? No. Her plan for healing and wholeness is to have sex with a married man her father’s age because nothing resolve grief and father issues like adding additional sexual trauma to one’s life and others’.

Jen
Jen
9 years ago

It’s gross. I miss my dad a lot. I was Daddy’s girl. But I’m not sexually attracted to relatives. Wonder if she was sexual abused by him.

unicornomore
unicornomore
9 years ago
Reply to  Jen

Jen my thoughts too…wonder if dad sexually abused her. My daughter is a bereaved 19 yr old and she isnt trying to screw old men euuuwwww.

Regina
Regina
9 years ago
Reply to  Lina

Yeah, just a “hole” I guess that will have to do!

Carol
Carol
9 years ago

Wow. You know, I’m stupid enough that I might try to save a marriage after infidelity. But I can honestly say, if I was married to someone who fucked someone as stupid and mean as that whore, I would divorce him just for being attracted to such a person. No way would I ever want to be with a man who liked *that*.

Patsy
Patsy
9 years ago
Reply to  Carol

Ha, Carol! My IC said that should X and OW ever get together permanently, his fantasy that she was kind and gentle would be in for a rude shock.

Regina
Regina
9 years ago
Reply to  Patsy

I believe a lot of cheaters of both sexes think this makes them so special, that they managed to get someone in a committed relationship to screw them!! Wooo-whoooo! What an accomplishment! The Chump doesn’t even know they are in a competition, so what kind of competition is that?? Like killing an unarmed man, where is the skill & cunning in that? Fools and imbeciles they are.

Nord
Nord
9 years ago
Reply to  Carol

I had a reaction like that once I had a dealing or two with final OW. She was a smug, dumb bitch who thought she was a winner. But it turns out she’s like ex: she takes on personality traits of those around her because she has no idea who she is. It’s going to be pretty funny once one or both of them realise neither is actually a whole, functioning person.

Annabella
Annabella
9 years ago
Reply to  Nord

Nord & Drew…my ex ho-wife is also just like him. They have taken each others personality and made it their own. They even speak the same and think that they sound so much smarter and cool when they use big “words” such as “assuage” and “succinct”. They sound so much alike at times I can’t tell them apart. I’ve written about a blog that she had a wrote one directed at me. She revised it 4X’s…I kid you not. I have all 4 blogs stating different things and called herself “his last love”. She also gloats about being younger than me..I told her she might be younger but she looks used, abused and put away wet. She was 23 when he left and I was 38..I looked younger than she and she looked her she was about 40. I remember once when I asked him why her…he said he didn’t know and that “she was nothing spectacular and plain” lol

Drew
Drew
9 years ago
Reply to  Nord

Nord, That whole taking on personality traits…like a chameleon. This! Too I believe people who fuck those “married” or “committed” (and those in such relationships) have a major screw loose. Isn’t this the same whore who’s fucking that man’s son (a babe at 24, god forbid that my son should run across someone this dysfunctional….). You know they say you get an adult brain and way of thinking at 25 but this AP has missed the filing deadline. My stupid ex chose a stupid whore too. Go figure.

Kimberly
Kimberly
9 years ago
Reply to  Carol

I truly hope that she has filed already. Her husband sounds like a winner. He’s such a kind man my ass

missdeltagirl
missdeltagirl
9 years ago
Reply to  Carol

“. . . I would divorce him just for being attracted to such a person.” This!!!!! LMAO

Moving Liquid
Moving Liquid
9 years ago

You just can’t make these people up. What a clueless horror.

Anonymous Coward
Anonymous Coward
9 years ago
Reply to  Moving Liquid

Maybe there are folks who could make these people up, or use material like this to construct a character for a book or a show. Their behavior is simple enough to predict. They’re like robots.

It might be that they are too easy.

I think we don’t see too much of it, outside of tripe like Twilight, because of how boring a story composed of such “characters” would quickly become.

Donna
Donna
9 years ago

Coward, I only have experience with easy other women with no morals or self respect and serial cheating narcs who find lying with ease compatible with picking them up. No experience with programmable robots. Do you think we can crack the code and teach them empathy? Now that would be a useful application. Ya think?

Moving Liquid
Moving Liquid
9 years ago

Anonymous Coward, we’re all anonymous here (pretty much). You should not call yourself a coward.

onthehill
onthehill
9 years ago

This whole email, to me, comes off with the following attitude (in my opinion). And please do not take offense because I’m only translating the underlying message *I* get from this snotty kid:

“Listen to me. You are a Has-Been. You were stupid enough to marry some guy who cheated on his former wife; cheats on you; and will continue to cheat. I am awesome enough to use this idiot and toss him back in the lake when I’m done like an undersized trout. But don’t despair: YOU should continue to use him for his financial stability and good nature. However, it’s up to you to wipe his cheating chin when he gets that stroke – not ME !!! I’m on to greener pastures, chump! Oh by the way – you’re a nice lady – no offense!

Carol
Carol
9 years ago
Reply to  onthehill

Where’s the “like” button!

Polgara
Polgara
9 years ago
Reply to  Carol

I caught myself looking for a “like” button too.

GoodMazal
GoodMazal
9 years ago
Reply to  Carol

That is a good read onthehill, what a pompous ass. At first, it was hard to stomach her disrespect for this chump, but she has the same disrespect for herself. Dumber than dirt to think like this, let alone send a letter to another person. She really could care less about anything except her very sick ego. Sniff them out and get away.

onthehill
onthehill
9 years ago
Reply to  GoodMazal

Unbelievable temerity to speak to this man’s wife the way she did. I don’t know that I’d even dignify it with a response. Maybe just take a copy of it to (my) attorney as evidence. Good Lord.

Charles
Charles
9 years ago

She implies that she wants a sexual relationship with her father. If my wife’s affair partner told me that my wife reminded him of his mother I would vomit repeatedly for all kinds of reasons that are difficult to articulate!

SoCal Chump
SoCal Chump
9 years ago
Reply to  Charles

The father reminder is very creepy. Reminds me when I was first dating my Cheater, his mother said I looked like her when she was young.

Vegan Chump
Vegan Chump
9 years ago
Reply to  Charles

My EXH told me that his OW (now his wife) reminded him of his mother.

Sick!

outoftheblue
outoftheblue
9 years ago
Reply to  Vegan Chump

I met my cheater 40 years ago so knew my late mother in law when she was in her late 40s. OW is short like she was, fat like she was at that time, she did lose some weight later, face same shape, dark hair like her, which she has grown for the first time I in 20 years, so she now has long hair like MIL had, and he went off with her when she was about the age that MIL was when I first met her. She even has the bad looking teeth and feet that MIL had. But as far as I know MIL remained faithful to FIL through 60 years of marriage

kb
kb
9 years ago
Reply to  Charles

My STBX texted his girlfriend a picture of his mother in the middle of an argument they were having (they chiefly communicate via text), telling OW that he missed his mother, that his mother would tell him what to do. Wow. Issues.

Dear OW: Welcome to the mommy role. How’s it feel to know that my STBX is fucking you because you remind him of his mother?

betrayedfriend
betrayedfriend
9 years ago
Reply to  Charles

I called my OW, and I asked her, So what do you love about STBXH? and she said “well he can be a jerk sometimes, but he reminds me so much of my father, and I always thought I would end up with someone like him” – I had great, great pleasure in telling him that he reminded her of her father. LOL

StrongerEveryday
StrongerEveryday
9 years ago
Reply to  betrayedfriend

“I had great, great pleasure in telling him that he reminded her of her father.” Hysterical! Absolutely priceless.

Donna
Donna
9 years ago

Ow calls him daddy, gross. She cut his hair and I asked him if her daddy was a military man or a drunk cowboy Sick whores.

Shechump
Shechump
9 years ago
Reply to  Donna

Oh, I have a doozie. X always told me I reminded him of his mother and that’s why he couldn’t have sex with me. I should have left him on the first date. Silly me, thought he was holding back for marriage….and then BLEH sex. Never again. What a waste of 35 yr of my sexual powers.

Chumpita
Chumpita
9 years ago
Reply to  Shechump

Lesson learned: we should ALWAYS listen carefully to what people say about themselves on a first date…it will predict the future with almost 100% certainty.

Charles
Charles
9 years ago
Reply to  betrayedfriend

paging Dr. Freud!

LovedAJackass
LovedAJackass
9 years ago
Reply to  Charles

Or Dr. Howard, Dr. Fine, and Dr. Howard…for those of us old enough to remember.

Roberta
Roberta
9 years ago
Reply to  LovedAJackass

LovedAJackass, gotcha! Too damn funny! I swear, unless you have lived through this crap, no one would believe it! These cheats are somewhere out there! Whatever fantasy land or orbit they are in, I hope to NEVER visit!

Carol
Carol
9 years ago

“Aimee” reminds me a lot of the OW a friend of mine had to deal with. I was stunned at the crap that spewed from her mouth. I was at least fortunate enough that the whores my now ex–husband chose left me alone. My friend’s husband left for the two-bit emotionally damaged whore and she was devastated. I, otoh, thought how great it was that she was rid of such an idiot. I mean, who wants a man who falls for that kind of woman? That’s just plain gross. Ewww. They deserve each other. Lawyer up, get rid of the fools.

Poppy
Poppy
9 years ago

Got to the family pet bit and laughed so much that I spilled my coffee everywhere

LovedAJackass
LovedAJackass
9 years ago
Reply to  Poppy

Yes, I hope the hilarious “UBT aside” becomes a regular feature.

Kira
Kira
9 years ago

My head hurts so much after reading all of that! And can I say JESUS CHRIST on all of the mentions of how Cheater reminds her of her dead father?! We’ve all thought these much younger OW have “Daddy Issues,” well THAT just confirmed it. (Shivers and throws up.)

The other thing I always think about with OW/OM that hook up with people 20+ years older than them is – You’re not going to want to take care of them as the age difference gets more profound – thanks to the dim-bulb OW in this instance for actually confirming that!

UnderConstruction
UnderConstruction
9 years ago
Reply to  Kira

I don’t think this ow is even being genuine about this guy reminding her of her dead Dad. I think she didn’t think that comparison thru very well and just wrote what she thought moth gain her the most empathy from this chump wife. Cannot trust ANYTHING from an ow/om’s mouth. They are as bad as cheaters when it comes to truth telling, IMO. They all say what they think you want to hear in order to avoid blame or guilt.

fbi
fbi
9 years ago

Sweetz I know you’re religious and may not want to divorce but why are you still with this shitbag? He is making a mockery of your union. He is having a full on affair with this daddy issue skank. You need to teach him a lesson and leave him to his own devices. Move on you will be more at peace after the storm dies down, this is too hurtful for anyone to bear. If he can’t keep his cock in his pants dump him. ..he s worse than a pavlovian dog!!!

Tempest
Tempest
9 years ago
Reply to  fbi

If I recall correctly, Sweetz is lining up her ducks and waiting for the 10 year marriage mark so she can collect asshat’s Social Security. Smart woman, but I am so sorry she has to live through another 9 months or so of this.

LovedAJackass
LovedAJackass
9 years ago
Reply to  Tempest

Sweetz can build a lot of fabulous life foundation in 9 months–take a class, strengthen friendships, figure out what makes her happy. It’s way smart to hold on for the SS and keep her ducks lined up.

Phi Slama Jama Mama
Phi Slama Jama Mama
9 years ago

Just look at the video. The text is in Spanish, and not the point…

http://sopit.as/1HyQ988

Tayra P
Tayra P
9 years ago

Unbelievable! What a stupid (OW) woman! Makes me sad that she is so utterly clueless. Love the pet idea but I don’t believe she is capable of connecting the dots on that one. Sweetz needs to divorce him, heal from this asshole and finally have a great life.

igotthesilver
igotthesilver
9 years ago

ugh! This whore makes me want to puke…she needs some therapy STAT! And not with a therapist that looks like her daddy. YUCK.

namedforvera
namedforvera
9 years ago

Woah, Nellie! (family mule??) Get thee to a therapist, creepy person with Daddy issues. Candidate for probable sexual abuse?

And the Cheaterpants, who thinks this is all fine? eee-www. I am so sorry, Sweetz, that your husband is unmasked to be someone with such low standards.

He never deserved you.

LivingMyLife
LivingMyLife
9 years ago

It sounds like a typical woman making the hound( the H) chase her fox tail. Take this letter to the nearest wolf attorney and let there pizza loving life flourish in oregano breath

Arnold
Arnold
9 years ago

Holy crap. This one is one of the dumber of the OWs, a dim group to begin with. I wonder what her father would have thought of this.

tony
tony
9 years ago
Reply to  Arnold

I wonder what Jesus would think of this…

Hesatthecurb
Hesatthecurb
9 years ago
Reply to  Arnold

I wonder what her MOTHER would think of this……

Scott
Scott
9 years ago

I can’t stop laughing…the whole thing is justification and blame and cl just nailed her for what she is…great stuff…

TheBetterJamie
TheBetterJamie
9 years ago

I JUST THREW UP INSIDE MY OWN MOUTH

TheBetterJamie
TheBetterJamie
9 years ago
Reply to  TheBetterJamie

And Sweets, I send you the biggest hug ever. I can’t imagine what it was like to read this insanity and realize it’s been brought in as part of your reality. I am so sorry.
It’s not my place to press my views on what surviving infidelity looks like to anyone (I too struggled with divorce because of my religion. Luckily STBX filed and took the burden off me.) but I think I speak for everyone here when I say that we would fully support you moving on as a single woman. You’ve clearly got so much to offer (even the OW admits that…straaaaaange) and you could have a new lease on life, the life you deserve.

I’ll be thinking about you today.

NWBiblio
NWBiblio
9 years ago
Reply to  TheBetterJamie

Me, too. I’m sorry, Sweetz, that THIS is what your guy threw you over for: an idiot. I think if you look at it from just the right angle, though, you might see how poorly this reflects on him, that he would choose someone like this. And you might even realize that the flipside is that YOU are NOT like her, which is actually a good thing.

It was comfort to me when I realized XH had chosen a 25-year-old waitress who spends all her day on Buzzfeed quizzes about which Game of Thrones character or dog breed she most resembles, and all her nights partying, because I was never gonna be that girl. Clearly, he wanted something different than an overeducated bookworm doctor, so a PickMe dance was never gonna work in my favor, thank god.

Thank your lucky stars you are not this bubble-head, and try to take a little comfort in the knowledge that your shell of a man is not who you thought he was to be so easily taken in by such a creature as this.

RockStarWife
RockStarWife
9 years ago
Reply to  NWBiblio

I hear you, NWB. I could never be that girl/guy/homewrecker/prostitute my STBXH wanted me to be. And now that cheater STBXH has filed and the Court has repeatedly had its way with him (refused to be manipulated by him), he may never have the LIFE he wanted. I, fortunately and unexpectedly have been given the incredible opportunity to trade UP to a fabulous fellow (who is an old friend and also a chump)!

Hope life improves for Sweetz soon.

LovedAJackass
LovedAJackass
9 years ago
Reply to  NWBiblio

NWBiblio, you are so right. I’m another overeducated bookworm doctor/athlete. Jackass preferred someone who thinks the past tense of “see” is “seen” and spends her time pining after HGTV-style million-dollar homes, themed false fingernail, and overdone eye makeup. She’s dumb as a rock. But as my mother (the narcissist, bless her heart, and she should know) always said, “Water seeks its own level.”

Donna
Donna
9 years ago
Reply to  NWBiblio

NWB, after I met the skanky whore my x called his Dream Girl he was literally embarrassed. I sent him a text saying if that was what he was looking for all these years, I wished he just told me! I could never be THAT. If only they were honest. He is now living the dream shacked up in a shitty apartment with a disgusting whore. Now that the pain has subsided it is laughable. He found an inmate.

hurt1
hurt1
9 years ago
Reply to  NWBiblio

NWBIblio,

“…you might see how poorly this reflects on him.”

Never thought of this!! About 3 months after dday & 2 weeks after he filed (remember I was still in a state of shock), I called one his co-workers (we had been to dinner a few times at his home) & told him about OWhore. He was in disbelief saying no way, not her. I had this info because ex told me on dday. Apparently he didn’t even know that my ex was barking up her tree (and skirt), wining/dining her & buying jewelry or divorcing me for that matter. If anything I felt it made him question ex’s judgement.

This co-worker was a few years older & bet he did question ex about her. This co-worker left Poland in 1980 & had to wait almost 5 years before his wife could come here, he wasn’t able to go back to Poland during that time. He often mentioned how much he loved her & she was a keeper because she waiting all that time to join him. Ex & I often talked about how great of a marriage they had.

Tempest
Tempest
9 years ago
Reply to  NWBiblio

NWB–Brilliant sense of perspective (for both your situations).

StrongerEveryday
StrongerEveryday
9 years ago
Reply to  NWBiblio

You make an excellent point here about the OW, NWBiblio, one I can relate to as well. It’s much more productive to see that for whatever messed up reasons of his own, this ridiculous OW is what your H is into now. He’s shown his cards. It’s time to move on.

Sending you a huge (((hug)))) Sweetz.

Nicole S
Nicole S
9 years ago
Reply to  TheBetterJamie

I second what BetterThanJamie said. Hugs and compassion sent your way Sweetz.

Nicole S
Nicole S
9 years ago
Reply to  Nicole S

Sorry, TheBetterJamie- got your name wrong. Geez, time for some caffeine. Please forgive.

TheBetterJamie
TheBetterJamie
9 years ago
Reply to  TheBetterJamie

But seriously…what a shit show. There’s so much disorder in there I don’t know where to begin….wow…
Delusional level-expert

MmmHmm
MmmHmm
9 years ago
Reply to  TheBetterJamie

Yes the other woman clearly has a personality disorder. She doesn’t care how her actions are affecting everyone else as long as she gets what she needs from the affair to “feel whole again.” Sweets is over there in the corner interrupting their pizza party with her tears and shit. “Like OMG! What a buzz kill. Here are some Puffs. Just look the other way! The problem isn’t what we’re doing, it’s your reaction to it! If you keep looking all pathetic with those messy emotions, he’s only going to want me MORE. I can’t help it that your husband is so attracted to me. It’s not easy being fabulous. Don’t worry, I really don’t even want him.”

betrayedfriend
betrayedfriend
9 years ago

OMG – I hope Sweetz had a good laugh at her expense, and freed herself from her stupid husband so he could have this utterly stoooopid girl.

Sweetz
Sweetz
9 years ago
Reply to  betrayedfriend

Actually, I am frightened for my stepson…for him this is not a laughing matter. But as for my marriage, it is on the way out by the years end.

Mehphista
Mehphista
9 years ago
Reply to  Sweetz

Hey Sweetz,

I second, third and infinity what others are saying here. Glad the divorce is in hand.

Having a child in the mix is awful, your own, or a step. All you can do is model decency and integrity. It sucks for kids-they were abused as badly as the spouse, yet society and the system coerce them into relationships with people who just.plain.suck.

But you don’t and I am assuming the Chump Mother of your stepson is somewhere in this? If you have coparented over the years, then maybe you two should talk. The kid gets priority over the jerkwad and Miss CankerpantsDaddyIssuesJesusCreepPersonalityDonor.

As do you.

Love to Chump Nation, and to you, Sweetz! Tuesday will come.

x-Meh

TheBetterJamie
TheBetterJamie
9 years ago
Reply to  Sweetz

Good for you, sweetz!

not Juliet
not Juliet
9 years ago

I think it’s good to communicate with these nitwit ow/on at least once. I know after I talked to the ow in my case, her rating on the Glamour meter went into the negative zone. From that point I was mostly pissed off that he picked such an inferior person to hold up as wonderful. No wonder she ate that shit up, cause none of the flattery/ high opinion has any basis in reality. Ugh, a true loser. As is he.

LovedAJackass
LovedAJackass
9 years ago
Reply to  not Juliet

All I needed was Pinterest. The stupid is right out there for the world to see.

Annabella
Annabella
9 years ago
Reply to  LovedAJackass

I had a career when I met ex. When we got married he wanted me to stay at home with the kids. So I left my job and little by little I was becoming more dependent on him. Eventually, he gave me an “allowance “. Ho-wife is educated and told me that I wasn’t a real “sahm” and apparently I never worked a day in my life according to her (I know he told her that bs) I’ve worked since I was 15 yrs old. Since he left I found a great job that allows me to continue my education and be with my son after school. I’ll be graduating with two degrees next year and will be relocating once I do. Again she throws the fact that I was a sahm like I should be ashamed. After telling her for the umpteenth time that is was he who wanted me to stay home, I stopped trying to justify what I did for my family. She also refuses to believe that he refused to pay for my textbooks (I started school before their affair ) bc he “didn’t want me to go to school bc he thought I would find someone better than him). Then the pos cheats on me with a college educated whore who looks like a tranny destroying my self esteem in the process. Now they are married and she thinks she’s won. I’m patiently waiting for karma to hit them both.

Jen
Jen
9 years ago
Reply to  not Juliet

I kind of want to let him know that I am aware OW level of attractiveness isn’t high. Because I think he would be embarassed, and I remember when a really stupid young girl at work kept throwing herself at him. She was not liked by employees, and her level of maturity was not high. I just ignored it and waited. He discarded her, I think because I was willing to discard him, and nobody was impressed with this poor young girl. They did like me because I do have class.

But we are no contact, and none of that should matter now. I just think if I had realized how skanky and fairly unattractive she was, I would have been much calmer about it, and he would of let it go. I don’t believe it’s about sex, its about points. But we shouldn’t have to put up with this immaturity. The girl in the letter is trying to play a head game. Let him know she did it, but don’t answer her. Wait till you get your ten years to leave and do it unceremoniously. It isn’t personal. It’s business. That girl needs to pay for her own therapy.

Mehphista
Mehphista
9 years ago
Reply to  Jen

The Downgrade looks like a horse, got a purple Mowhawk for her 40th birthday, hasn’t worked a day in the past 15 years, dropped out of school, drinks every day, never isn’t stoned, is well known for her freeloading… the clue is in the name, really.

Oh, and Sweetz? This email? Send it to stepkid’s Mom as well, maybe? And your lawyer.

hurt1
hurt1
9 years ago
Reply to  not Juliet

“From that point I was mostly pissed off that he picked such an inferior person to hold up as wonderful.”

Never met OWhore but ex described her as skinny with 5 kids & no custody. He loved (use to love) women with curves & big boobs – wait that’s me. We also decided to not have kids early on in our marriage. I asked him point blank after dday if he regretted us having kids & he said no.

Flowerlady
Flowerlady
9 years ago

What an entitled idiot. She’ll be sorry when some day someone feels entitled to take something of hers. Karma’s a bitch.

Donna
Donna
9 years ago
Reply to  Flowerlady

FlowerLady, screwing someone who reminds her of her daddy as a way if grieving his loss makes me think she rides her karma bus daily.

Mehphista
Mehphista
9 years ago
Reply to  Donna

As do all APs. Look at Lewinsky-yeesh! The Downgrade’s karma is twofold: firstly she has to be herself, and, secondly, she gets to live with Mr Fab.

Meh.

Nicole S
Nicole S
9 years ago
Reply to  Flowerlady

That’s exactly what I see. I see “Dear Sweetz: Blah, blah, blah, I’m selfish and don’t really care about anyone but myself, blah, blah, blah, Did I mention I’m very self absorbed? Blah, blah, blah.” I don’t even buy the daddy stuff, just more entitlement BS costumed in self pity.

MmmHmm
MmmHmm
9 years ago
Reply to  Nicole S

I think the daddy stuff is her self pity showing.

Jen
Jen
9 years ago
Reply to  MmmHmm

It’s weird that she would admit it. I think she is doing reverse psychology. “Don’t leave him or make a big thing about this” actually means “leave him so we can reap the financial benefits.”

fbi
fbi
9 years ago

Sweetz…I forgot to say that your husband is just looking for stability and a cover for his debauchery. If he loved you and thought so greatly about you he would not hurt like this. It’s true, do you want to grow old with such a selfish buzzard? Nurturing and taking care of him? Making him puréed soups because he can’t chew after his stroke…maybe then he will stop gallivanting like don Juan.!

Beth
Beth
9 years ago

Time to see a divorce attorney and bring that letter with you! This woman is very unwell and so is the cheater!!!!! This is very sick indeed. Nothing will change. Infact it will get worse and worse. Serial cheater indeed.

ohthisagain
ohthisagain
9 years ago

Love it, Chump Lady. Oh, and I’m not buying the daddy issues. Aimee is as deep as a wading pool and has no real ability to care about anyone other than herself. She uses “daddy passed away a year ago…I’m so saddd” so that she can play up her victim status. I’d be willing to bet when he was alive that she cared no more for her dad than she did her ex-husband, Sweetz’s husband, or anyone for that matter. Her heart is dark and empty.

Lizzy
Lizzy
9 years ago
Reply to  ohthisagain

Exactly what I was thinking! OW is using daddy as an excuse for sympathy – poor me, my father passed away, WAHHHH. Now let me get away with WTFever I want to do.

Roberta
Roberta
9 years ago
Reply to  ohthisagain

Ohthisagain, I get the feeling that the OW misses Daddy cause she used his deep pockets! She has just moved on to another deep pocket and screwing him is the way she is able to get what she wants! I mean gosh! Somebody has to pay for her pizza!!!

Michele
Michele
9 years ago

Why is it that all OW use the excuse that he Pursued me? As if that makes a difference!! They could Always say NO but choose not to. By the way to all the OW out there, Did you ever ask yourself why a married man would approach you in the first place? Here’s some answers: flirting, damsel in distress, or you were just plain garbage!! Let’s face it a man who enters into an affair does not have Standards and seeks out someone lower than himself.

StrongerEveryday
StrongerEveryday
9 years ago
Reply to  Michele

I agree Michele. I find the whole “who-pursued-who” argument tiresome anyway. People with integrity don’t seek out affairs and also would never consider opening themselves up to an affair. And really, is it like we’re assigning a higher level of fault to one or the other? He pursued her so that makes him 60% to blame, whereas she’s only 40% to blame? Or is it a 70/30 split? 80/20? Nope. Regardless of who made the first move, both parties in the affair are in it together.

Michele
Michele
9 years ago

Oh stupid us it’s really our fault!!! Lmao!! It’s a matter of who pulled the trigger, or who drove the get away car! Same difference!! You see when you know your wrong about something you will look to blame anyone or anything to Justify your actions!! Takes a lot of integrity to say I made a choice, not a mistake, I take Full responsibility , No one is to Blame but Me, and my selfishness. But wait we’re talking about Cheaters here who don’t have integrity !!

Beth
Beth
9 years ago
Reply to  Michele

Michele I fully agree with everything you have written. Also let me add to your comments (if you don’t mind) we all have FREE WILL and we all have the right to walk away when any married person (male/female) starts on the sorry fake stories about how the marriage is not working for them. Sadly so many of these AP are the same type of thought process as the cheaters. We are living in a increasing level of NPD world now sadly. Still no excuse just to know the basic level of right and wrong in this world. Sadly all these people just know one word and that is ME, ME, and oh yes ME……

Tempest
Tempest
9 years ago

^^^^ This. I agree (100%).

This Chump medicated for your protection
This Chump medicated for your protection
9 years ago
Reply to  Michele

OM like to say “it ain’t my fault she wanted it.”
Same playbook, different gender!

Aimee shits too close to the house !

2bshameless
2bshameless
9 years ago
Reply to  Michele

but that’s not even true he was staying away from her SHE went and invited him for pizza surprise

Cindy
Cindy
9 years ago
Reply to  Michele

Well said Michele, and a very awesome UBT Chumplady!

Michele
Michele
9 years ago
Reply to  Cindy

Thanks

Beth
Beth
9 years ago
Reply to  Michele

Well said Michele and Chumplady! I could not agree more with you both.

Roberta
Roberta
9 years ago
Reply to  Cindy

Bravo Michele! I so agree!

Chumpfor21
Chumpfor21
9 years ago

Astonishing. Just amazing at what passes for human beings these days.
I am sorry for Sweetz. I know just how destabilizing it can be to have a long term marriage and all you thought was worth your love dissolve in a sleaze bucket.

Sweetz – you deserve better than a man who would pick this idiot – hope you are on your way out the door.

Lulu
Lulu
9 years ago

According to Sweetz comments yesterday, Aimee is also fucking Sweetz’s stepson, which just amplifies the creepiness and incest factor on both the husband and Aimee’s parts by about 5000%

I can summarize this letter much more succinctly: “I’m a complete nutjob and bimbo and I’m going to continue fucking your husband until I get bored with him and move on to someone else. You should thank me.”

LovedAJackass
LovedAJackass
9 years ago
Reply to  Lulu

Sweetz, document, document, document. Pretty sure your STBX won’t want the creepy “Aimee sleeping with father and son” stuff to get into the public domain.

Jen
Jen
9 years ago
Reply to  Lulu

Okay, that is really gross, really disordered. How gross for them. Do men like to share? I know women don’t. That sounds like an episode of Californication.

Mehphista
Mehphista
9 years ago
Reply to  Jen

Or Jerry Springer. Here the funny ends!

I am assuming then, this kid is of age? There is nothing you can save here, Sweetz, except yourself.If not, go directly to Child Protection Services, do not pass go, and tell the Mom.

Lulu
Lulu
9 years ago
Reply to  Mehphista

The stepson is 21 and Aimee is 24, so if she wasn’t such a complete nutcase, they would be much more appropriate for each other as partners than Sweetz’s husband.

Jen
Jen
9 years ago
Reply to  Lulu

Again sounds like a bad episode of Californication. Hank sleeps with Karen’s future 16 year old stepdaughter who proceeds to punch him n the face during sex. Too much familiarity going on.

kb
kb
9 years ago
Reply to  Lulu

Ewww!

Kira
Kira
9 years ago
Reply to  Lulu

OMG!

I thought so before, but I think doubly so now, Sweetz needs to get away from all of them ASAP.

JC
JC
9 years ago

Fascinating.

I disagree with CL, though. The whole “reminds me of my dead father” thing is just an excuse. It’s a morbidly convenient rationalization that this woman uses to justify her terrible behavior. IMO, she’s no more messed up than any other OW/OM, except that she has the stones to write to Sweetz.

Speaking of stones…

I know a woman (a former friend), L, who cheated on her husband for 3.5 years with a colleague (who was also married). She and her AP made some homemade videos! And when the AP decided he wanted out and to re-commit to the marriage (at least for a few weeks), L sent the videos to the AP’s wife. The logic here appears to be to hurt the wife and force the AP back into L’s arms. L regularly writes to the AP’s wife, calling her all sorts of names and belittling her ability to keep her man satisfied.

Of course, none of this involved’s L’s own husband: a 6-foot-3, muscular, ruggedly handsome engineer and do-it-yourself handyman. He was a chump for almost 4 years before filing for divorce. And to this day, L insists that she wants him back.

Of course she does! Cheaters and their APs have plenty of wants. Too many wants, if you ask me.

insistonhonesty
insistonhonesty
9 years ago
Reply to  JC

I’m going to latch onto and file away that last bit: “You have more needy needs than one woman could possibly fill; I resign.”

Papasadouche
Papasadouche
9 years ago

OMG. That was actually hard to read and really hard for a sane person to wrap their head around. I often wonder how people like that get through the world. On the other hand, she explained the answer to that question very well. I feel sorry for her in a way. She will never be happy because her perceived source of happiness is from other people. In this case outwardly ruining the lives of others. It’s really sad our culture (and others) has become this.

Anonymous Coward
Anonymous Coward
9 years ago
Reply to  Papasadouche

Well, what happens next?

According to Divorcesource.com, “The refined divorce rate – the number of divorces per 1,000 married woman – includes only those people at risk of divorce, so social scientists and demographers see it as preferable to the crude rate. Using this routine, the divorce rate ranged from a low of 14.3 in North Dakota to a high of 34.5 in Washington, D.C., for a national average of 19.4, according to National Center for Family and Marriage Research. Using this regime, in 2008, divorce fell from a rate of 17 divorces per 1,000 married women in 2007 to 16.9 per 1,000 married women.”

Rates of marriage and commitment are going down quite a bit.

Source: “http://www.divorcesource.com/ds/main/u-s-divorce-rates-and-statistics-1037.shtml”

Divorce rates are lower, but so is the number of people getting married.

The lifetime likelihood of divorce is still at roughly 1/3, and the biological fact of motherhood against the less powerful interdependency of fatherhood makes many poor societies matriarchal, in a bad way.

Kara
Kara
9 years ago

What does this have to do with anything? I fail to see what the point of a bunch of out-of-context statistics about divorce sprinkled with a topping of biological deterministic sexism is for this given situation. Is this some kind of enfeebled push for her to not divorce this asshole?

LovedAJackass
LovedAJackass
9 years ago

These stats need to be seen in relation to demographics. Average age for marriage is going up. And the recession and economic collapse that hit in 2007-8 as well as high student loan debt makes it tougher for young people to get established.

Donna
Donna
9 years ago
Reply to  Papasadouche

I only have sadness for Sweety. No empathy whatsoever for someone who sleeps with a married man, his son and taunts a victim of a use. Boundaries are in full force for this chump. Selflessness and forgiveness are two qualities narcs exploit. This is unimaginable, I feel for you Sweety.

Friend
Friend
9 years ago

Aimee,
Honey, your Daddy was an ugly, sick bastard. Move on.
He didn’t really love you. His death is a good opportunity for you to let go. Bad fathers teach bad values. What you have is a rotting bucket of fish guts where there ought to be a little steel.
Your Dad walked through life ignoring life’s dangers and the hole in the living room floor.
You will never be whole by visiting your dead father. He doesn’t care about your sweet intentions and your true needs. Please, let him go.
Practice your ‘goodbyes’. Walk away.

Sincerely,
SMH

Anonymous Coward
Anonymous Coward
9 years ago
Reply to  Friend

// ,

The UBT works in reverse, too, you know, for those who choose to so use it.

I suspect that anything short of an outright court order reads as “Attention attention attention attention.”

For this,

“Aimee,
Honey, your issues are real, and hurt you a lot. We pay attention to them, and to you.
This message, here, is about you, and how pitiful your childhood must have been. His death is a good opportunity for you to call attention to your plight, and how it can never be made right, because there are people willing to argue the opposite, and thereby pay attention to you. Your bad values are not your responsibility. What you have is a rotting bucket of fish guts where there ought to be a little steel, and this is to blame for the bad things you do.
Your Dad walked through life ignoring life’s dangers and the hole in the living room floor.
You will never be whole by visiting your dead father, but damned if you can’t find people who will pay attention to the problems you create when you try. He doesn’t care about your sweet intentions and your true needs. Please, let him go, in a way that leaves the door open for skipping responsibility from future problems.
Practice your ‘goodbyes’, but also practice your I-had-a-hard-childhood face for when things go wrong.

Someone willing to give you attention,
SMH”

The real kibble factories are not out in the wide world, or in anyone’s mind. The kibble converters in the hearts of people who see the world that way.

When you have a hammer, every problem becomes a nail. When you have an army, every problem becomes a war. When you have a dumpster heart, everything it feels turns to garbage.

Anonymous Coward
Anonymous Coward
9 years ago

// ,

Oh, oh, I forgot to add, “Your issues are a part of what makes you such a complex, unpredictable, interesting, real person.”

Friend
Friend
9 years ago
Reply to  Friend

Disclaimer: please do not actually communicate with Aimee. I wouldn’t touch her with a 39.5 foot pole.

Sweetz
Sweetz
9 years ago
Reply to  Friend

Not even tempted. I have plans of my own and am not showing my hand.

LovedAJackass
LovedAJackass
9 years ago
Reply to  Sweetz

Can’t wait to hear the end of your story because I know you are mighty.

Donna
Donna
9 years ago
Reply to  Sweetz

Good for you Sweetz. Wishing you the strength in whatever you plan. Please think ONLY of yourself. Trust they ALL participated in this mess.

fiestypants
fiestypants
9 years ago

I can’t stop laughing! The family pet…bahahahahahaha. Love this CL. Now just get the husband to tell this OW “you remind me of my daughter. Let’s have sex!” and see how that goes over. She needs a really good shrink, not a humpbuddy. Freud would be so pleased.

CalamityJane
CalamityJane
9 years ago

“So I suppose that this means that I should expect to experience the same kind of waxing and waning from him also in due time. But I am willing to enjoy the relationship in spite of the risks and for however long it lasts.”

Translation:

I am will to enjoy the relationship because I AM JUST LIKE HIM.

Two completely amoral jackasses found each other. Nothing new here.

I would not wait to hand him this letter. I would give it to him now. I can’t imagine anything more embarrassing then to realize your lover thinks of you as their dad or mother. Puke.

CalamityJane
CalamityJane
9 years ago
Reply to  CalamityJane

Anybody lose their pet python, I think I found it.

Tempest
Tempest
9 years ago
Reply to  CalamityJane

!! I can’t stop laughing at that comment!

LovedAJackass
LovedAJackass
9 years ago
Reply to  Tempest

Yeah, that’s really funny.

CalamityJane
CalamityJane
9 years ago
Reply to  CalamityJane

Seriously, I can see her slithering with her tongue flicking back and forth…

SmmGood
SmmGood
9 years ago

Sweetz,

Please remove yourself from this triangle. It is time to protect yourself from people who do not deserve you. I know that it is easier said than done, but nothing is more soul crushing than the reality you are living now. Free yourself from the crazy!!

SmmGood

Dr. I Can't Believe I'm a Chump
Dr. I Can't Believe I'm a Chump
9 years ago

What a pathetic and broken person. Cut him loose and let her have everything she wants. She clearly cares a lot about him! Take this letter to your attorney– Pronto. You do not need your loser husband nor this kind of crazy in your life.

Anonymous Coward
Anonymous Coward
9 years ago

// ,

I don’t know, for a pathetic person, she seems to have participated in the causing of quite a bit of damage.

For someone with such poor judgement and critical thinking skills, she has, in fact, made quite a mark on the world she lives in. I imagine there’s not actually all that much to even break in the first place, and her heart seems basically invincible. Broken might not be quite the word, though I suppose I understand what you mean.

PAPrincess
PAPrincess
9 years ago

O M G! This is a fallen world. We chumps however do not have to fall with it!!!! God has better plans for all of us. Look away Aimee. Walk away Aimee. Get what you need financially, divorce, and be free to LOVE YOURSELF!!!!

conniered
conniered
9 years ago

Sweetz, not only does your husband show complete contempt for you by cheating in the first place but he has invited THIS kind of person into your life. He has made you an active PARTICIPANT and if you stay with him, then you are a WILLING participant. I think you should KNOW deep down in your soul that this is not what you desire or deserve. I hope you take action to leave this sleaze and the cra-cra riff-raff he has brought into your life. Big Hugs. Be brave. Be happy. Be FREE.

Pear-shaped
Pear-shaped
9 years ago

The OW is twenty-five years younger than the husband, not 25 years old. Sweetz says her husband is 62, the OW around 40. Plus she says the OW is also fucking the husband’s 24 year old son to boot! So she’s 37 years old, fucking a 62 year old and a 24 year old. Maybe she thinks it all levels out and there’s a guy her own age in there somewhere.

Jen
Jen
9 years ago
Reply to  Pear-shaped

I’m 43. I have had men in their sixties make a pass, but the idea grosses me out. It won’t gross me out when I am sixty, it’s just too big An age difference for me. I have also had men as young as 19 make a pass. I thought it was cute, but no way! My son is 19. I’m not weird, right?

just another chump
just another chump
9 years ago
Reply to  Jen

I’ve seen a few relationships with a bit of a gap in age work but like you the ewww factor cranks up with the age difference of over 10 years. I’d happily date a 42 or 62 year old if they were honest decent men and we were mutually compatible with interests and comparative attractiveness. I’ve always believed like attracts like (so I’m not Brad Pitt worthy but definitely not out of shape slob worthy either!)

Drew
Drew
9 years ago

Brad Pitt, eeeewwwwwwww haven’t you noticed he’s growing uglier every year? Cheaters are all the same, no matter what they spin. Give me an honest man, that is real beauty.

GladIt'sOver
GladIt'sOver
9 years ago
Reply to  Pear-shaped

Jesus, then she’s even scarier in real life than she is in that disturbed letter.

Pear-shaped
Pear-shaped
9 years ago
Reply to  GladIt'sOver

Yes, she is. She’s not a young idiot with daddy issues. She’s a mature (sort of) monster.

Kara
Kara
9 years ago

Oh my GOD that was so saccharine I think my tea over sweetened itself just by me sitting here reading her letter.

That girl has no fucking clue what she’s talking about. Seriously. She’s in deeeeeeep denial about how serious her issues are, and she has the audacity to basically “advise” Sweetz to pretty much just let him keep fucking her until either he’s picked a new target or she’s done with him is one of the most arrogant and entitled things I have ever heard. The fact that she has the ego to think she’s in any place to “advise” Sweetz of ANYTHING for that matter is entitled in and of itself. This girl has her head so far up her own ass that pizza she got from him is clogging her ears as it comes down her throat…

The minute I read the part(s) about how he reminds her of her father, I wanted to vomit. Freud would be choking on his pipe with this one. Holy. Shit. Men who look like/remind me of my father stay FAR, FAR, FAAAARRRRRRR away from my bedroom. She doesn’t need to just keep letting them “be friends” (yeah…ok, ‘Friends’) until he moves on to the next, she needs to be sitting in a shrink’s office.

If I were to respond with anything to this drivel, I’d just send her back a link to this UBT post. XD Then ignore whatever inevitable sob stories come from it.

Oh, yeah, and divorce this asshole.

Hey, Aimee, I’d “advise” you to keep out of the beds of married men and figure out why the image of your dead father turns you on. You got far more problems than you’re willing to acknowledge here and absolutely NO ROOM to be even breathing the same air as Sweetz. Also, you might want to look at what caused you to become divorced at the ripe old age of 25. Seems like you’ve made a lot of bad choices, you might want to change course, eh?

Finally realized
Finally realized
9 years ago
Reply to  Kara

Sweetz can’t do that – she’s waiting until the end of the year to file, which is very smart of her. If she lets on to anyone about this post then it could get back to her husband what her strategy is and ruin her chance to get her well-deserved SS benefits. There should be SOME compensation to having ever married her lousy cheater in the first place. It will be hard for her to get through the next months, but it would be really foolish to show her hand now. There’s been enough unfairness for her already.

Sweetz, you have my sympathy for your situation. This OW’s evil flaunting heart is shocking. She really has no shame whatsoever.

God has a real and kind and honorable man somewhere for you.

Scott
Scott
9 years ago

Here’s a plot twist, the affair partners usually are dumber than bricks. Aimee just confirmed what we all knew about AP’s. And CL didn’t break a sweat tearing her bumbling apart and shining the truth all over it.

Really, were we expecting more from an AP? Seriously, it’s so illustrative of the mentality, we shouldn’t be shocked there are people that actually buy this garbage as valid. Which is why the posts from the last several days are just circling the same drain. All those morons on loveshack or whatever site it was slamming CL, THIS is what you’re protecting. A mental midget with daddy issues.

This might be the only sane place left in the world. Where stupid is as stupid does and the morons are called morons for a reason. God bless CL for continuing to expose this stupidity.

Annabella
Annabella
9 years ago
Reply to  Scott

After reading everyone’s post it seems that the majority of OW have daddy issues. Ex’s ho-wife was 23..they met in Jan and he left in march. Her daddy passed away and my ex is 10 yrs older than she. Both cheaters have also used the same exact lines on me. It seriously blows my mind.

Lyn
Lyn
9 years ago
Reply to  Scott

Reading that letter certainly sheds light on the vacuum inside an AP’s head. I always wondered what was going on inside there, now I know. Absolutely nothing!! Aimee is just a big bundle of impulses. There’s no rational thought inside.

Scott
Scott
9 years ago
Reply to  Lyn

A big bundle of impulses…lol!

Like my parents used to say, sex doesnt take talent, commitment does…

Drew
Drew
9 years ago
Reply to  Scott

Scott, Damn straight! Sex is best when there is reciprocity, healthy relationships require this. That was missing in mine. Healthy respect, communication, shared goals, reciprocity, and time together. Oh, and great sex! 🙂 With my Cheater ex, the sex, like everything else, got worse not better. Wasted years waiting for ex to realize he had it all….(even with life challenges spelling it out, he never “got it.”) There is no saving Stupid.

Regina
Regina
9 years ago
Reply to  Drew

A man I really respected (since passed) said “You can’t outsmart stupidity.” I just love it, how true is that? Why bother trying?

Roberta
Roberta
9 years ago
Reply to  Scott

I agree Scott. My ex husband was so fond of telling me how smart and strong his MOW was. I told him that smart women don’t screw other women’s husbands and if she were truly strong then she could stand on her own two feet instead of chumping her husband while humping my husband! Strong women don’t need to line up the next sucker to take care of them!

Anonymous Coward
Anonymous Coward
9 years ago
Reply to  Roberta

// ,

What do you think they mean by strength?

Tempest
Tempest
9 years ago

jaw muscles?

ohthisagain
ohthisagain
9 years ago

When the husband refers to the MOW as smart and strong he’s probably referring to the times that the MOW and him plot their future together and she tells him how great he is and how he deserves better than his poor old chump wife. She would never treat him that way. She’s so smart and strong. Cheaters are dicks like that. It’s always about them. Always.

LovedAJackass
LovedAJackass
9 years ago
Reply to  ohthisagain

One time I asked Jackass what he saw in XW#2, since by his account she was the spawn of Satan, unattractive, nasty, narcissistic (blah blah). He said, “She has good genes.” He must have forgotten about that because he went on to talk about how disturbed her parents were and how his stepson was unhealthy and had a low IQ. So they just make stuff up.

Donna
Donna
9 years ago

Perhaps strength in numbers to the unmasking.

spiritwoman
spiritwoman
9 years ago

I loved my dad very much luckily my dad was an honorable, honest, faithful, reasonable, non judgmental person and I would love to find a partner who the morals and character of my dad. That by no means I would want to marry someone just like my dad or would have sexual fantasies about him. I’m glad I had a dad that I could look up to and that showed me how a man should treat me. Now if I could find a man that was raised the same way, lol

With all that said as a disclaimer, lol I wonder if her dad isn’t rolling over in his grave!

Drew
Drew
9 years ago
Reply to  spiritwoman

I too believe we look for familiar great qualities in those we partner with. IMHO in healthy (and unhealthy) families the opposite sex parent does influence a person’s choices in a mate (ie my son will fall in love with a witty strong optimistic brunette like me while my daughters will focus on partners who are educated, charming, hard workers, though they may also be attracted to the exact opposite!). I believe we are also greatly influenced by our same sex parent. I recognized Mom’s strengths and weaknesses and was very intentional with my own family. I wanted better, but not all good traits ended up well, as I suspect many of us now know. However, after having been Chumped, you can bet my kids will be looking at actions and how someone makes them feel….

not Juliet
not Juliet
9 years ago

Eeeewww. My father died when I was thirty, and I never had any interest in a man, then, now, or ever due to him reminding me of my dad. Eeew, just eeew. Sick bitch.

GladIt'sOver
GladIt'sOver
9 years ago
Reply to  not Juliet

Yes. My dad died 11 years ago and I miss him still, but I’m not looking for a boyfriend who reminds me of him. In fact, I’d have a hard time fucking a guy who reminded me of my dad. Aimee has serious issues.

Lookingup
Lookingup
9 years ago

I laughed from start to finish! Hilarious! Thanks!

Donna
Donna
9 years ago

Carol, cheaters aren’t really into screening their ho’s for much of anything. Let’s face it if they are willing to have unprotected sex with a stranger while they are possibly drunk and/or on drugs, its always a pass. The ones who fail are the ones with dignity and morals. Cheaters are really not that intelligent when it comes to OW in my opinion. Anything will do.

Sweetz, my heart goes out to you for having to tolerate having this seriously abusive, mentally ill woman in you life. Please, stay away with this evil woman and have no contact with her. She is so seriously desturbed and is gaining such pleasure taunting you. Please protect yourself.

Sweetz
Sweetz
9 years ago
Reply to  Donna

Bingo. Cheaters screen their prey for vulnerability. Aimee is exactly what he was looking for. Only problem is that cheaters that do not want to divorce will have a really hard time trying to extricate themselves from sick partners once they are finished with them.

TheClip
TheClip
9 years ago
Reply to  Sweetz

Aimee doesnt sound vulenerable to me at all. Aimee is calling the shots

Sweetz
Sweetz
9 years ago
Reply to  TheClip

Yes, but cheater pants VIEWS her as being vulnerable…remember, it was I who got the letter…although he will get it once I have already filed and left. He goes after women who appear to be broken (easy prey), and the first thing out of Aimee’s mouth when she was bring treasures into his store to sell was her grief for her father and that my husband reminded her of him. So, my husband took advantage of those facts and began to cultivate her for himself.

Mehphista
Mehphista
9 years ago
Reply to  Sweetz

Dingding! Is that the karma bus I hear?

I hope you can get away from the crazy. I moved 8,000 miles in the end. Not looking back.

Donna
Donna
9 years ago
Reply to  Sweetz

Sounds like the pick me dance.

Carol
Carol
9 years ago
Reply to  Donna

Yeah, that’s true. They will cheat with just about anything but they will swear the AP was something special. Meanwhile, they have a perfectly normal, sane, loving, decent spouse. It makes no sense.

DoubleDee
DoubleDee
9 years ago

I sensed a subtext of superiority and desperation going on that says that even though he has cheated before, this dimwit things she’s Something Special and is willing to take a gamble because really, the same thing won’t happen with her. She gives lip service to being hip and clued in to the situation and says she plans to discard him eventually, but something tells me she is dancing really hard in hopes this guy will pick her. My bet is that if he asked her, she would shack up with him in a New York minute. But he has made it clear that he has an awesome wife that he doesn’t intend to leave, so she is trying to pretend that it doesn’t bother her. But she really, really, really wants him to pick her. Sad and desperate and juvenile.

Finally realized
Finally realized
9 years ago
Reply to  DoubleDee

I totally agree with your assessment.

Lizzy
Lizzy
9 years ago
Reply to  DoubleDee

Agree, DoubleDee. OW is desperately trying to make herself feel superior. As if Sweetz needs all of her “advice” (barf!)

GladIt'sOver
GladIt'sOver
9 years ago

I smell some serious personality disorder underneath all the bullshit. That letter creeped me out… there are a lot of veiled threats there, lots of delusion and sadism hidden underneath pseudo-concern and benevolent advice. I thought of the bunny-boiling OW in Fatal Attraction. I think Sweetz’s cheating husband might have bitten off more than he can chew with that one.

This Chump medicated for your protection
This Chump medicated for your protection
9 years ago
Reply to  GladIt'sOver

Yes… Girls with Daddy issues are the last ones to know it. Her issues are complex. I agree she is dangerous!

Jen
Jen
9 years ago

That wasmy thought. A girl with real Daddy issues wouldn’t name them.

CalamityJane
CalamityJane
9 years ago
Reply to  GladIt'sOver

Yes, yes, yes, she is a bunny boiler!

NWBiblio
NWBiblio
9 years ago

I think this letter encapsulates the reason so many APs are young: they’re all still “playing the field.” They haven’t yet realized there’s a time when people STOP playing the field and want to settle down and have a solid and predictable life. It’s a lot more challenging to trip in & out of superficial relationships when you’re 50 than when you’re 25, or at least I’ve found it a lot more difficult.

I shudder at the dim-bulb perspective of this young woman, so clueless while spouting her “wisdom”. Eventually her looks will run out and she’ll find herself older, and when HER husband leaves her for a younger woman, she’ll see how that feels. Oh, to be able to peer into our own futures….

ringinonmyownbell
ringinonmyownbell
9 years ago
Reply to  NWBiblio

If this is playing the field… it is playing the mine field… Anyone who can write this letter, fuck father and son, send this letter, is an explosive disordered device ready to blow up anyone who comes near her. Sweetz, gather your ducks, play your own hand and ever so carefully step away from this shit storm. There is no hope for anyone involved in this little cluster fuck. I think she is of the fatal attraction persuasion too.

GladIt'sOver
GladIt'sOver
9 years ago
Reply to  NWBiblio

She’s not young…. she’s 25 years younger than Sweetz’s husband, she’s not 25. He’s in his 60s so she’s in her late 30s or early 40s. That makes her a lot scarier, IMHO.

ChumpFromF
ChumpFromF
9 years ago
Reply to  GladIt'sOver

Really ??? She sounds like a teenager ! Yes, this is a lot scarier then ! Her brain is underdeveloped or something

ChumpFromF
ChumpFromF
9 years ago
Reply to  NWBiblio

I agree with you… My first impression is that the woman is just young and not very bright to say the least. She is also very manipulable because reading between the lines, one understands she has been to a church to justify her own behaviour, and she now is sprinkling her poor litterature with a lot of “God” words that she clearly doesn’t understand. Trying to sound psychologically mature and failing miserably. In a couple of years, she will have forgotten the whole story just like a bad movie.
But the husband… What is he thinking ? That he can have sex with anyone as he pleases and easily fall back on his feet at his age ? That his soul can handle this level of betrayal and the ridicule of the situation ? Are these cheaters so delusional, that they believe they are creating themselves a bright and exceptional future ? Or maybe, they don’t think. They just enjoy the moment, the exhilarating feeling of being young again during this pitiful sexual act, and then they pretend to ignore the cramps.

NWBiblio
NWBiblio
9 years ago
Reply to  ChumpFromF

Yeah, I don’t know how this isn’t the start of a bad lifetime habit, right? I mean, why would he do it once, get away with it, then go back to his “old life” … and never do it again? Seems incredibly less realistic than thinking, “Hmm, well, when I get bored in the future, I’ll just do it again with someone else.” Trust shattered.

hanecita
hanecita
9 years ago

Wow… I thought the Shiny New Girlfriend Mr. Hanecita picked out was nuts, but this one…. Wow…..She’s certified Crazy.