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Chump Dating Questionnaire

Well so many of you have been after me for a chump dating service, that I had an idea for a post. If this is a nutty idea, hey, humor me. I’m going to write my own Chump Dating Questionnaire, hugely scientific, of course, of the sort you find in those critically, peer-reviewed journals like OKcupid and eHarmony.

Next part is — you answer! And include in your “profile” an email address that you have solely created for this blog post, like DebonairChump@gmail.com or CrazedSingleMotherof5@yahoo.com — do NOT post whatever email you use to post here or otherwise use, unless you don’t mind us (or spambots) writing to you there. This way, if spambots are roaming around, or freaks contact you and this experiment is a bust, well just delete the whole thing and forget I ever mentioned it.

Your answers will appear under your screen name, so we know it’s “you.”

Maybe magic will happen! Or at least you can make a few friends. Perhaps you’ve been reading Nord’s comments and really dig Nord and want to say howdy away from the confines of Chump Lady. Now’s your chance to reach out. And, if it progresses, then you can exchange actual names and emails.

If it’s a bust and no one writes to you, and it’s like a Charlie Brown’s Valentine’s Day debacle — blame me. This was my stupid idea and there’s a lid for every pot, and this is a very primitive dating questionnaire and clearly you’re destined for greater things.

If you find yourself happily partnered and just want to answer for the hell of it — or would enjoy emails from fellow chumps, do state that.

And if you’re a cheater looking for a nice new chump — hey, fuck off! We’re much smarter now. Take your sparkly shit elsewhere. Thank you.

Here’s the Questionnaire:

1. My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is…

2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is…

3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals?

4. Favorite inspirational quote?

5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…

6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want to go)

7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…

8. If  you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?

9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?

10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?

Ask Chump Lady

Got a question for the Chump Lady? Or a submission for the Universal Bullshit Translator? Write to me at info@chumplady.com. Read more about submission guidelines.
  • I’ll go first! info@chumplady.com — I’m happily married, but you can write me as a chumpy friend.

    1. My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is…

    Met a sociopath. Married a sociopath. His mistress called 6 months into the marriage to tell me she existed. Realized he was a sociopath and divorced him. Healed, married a wonderful man, and blog about infidelity now.

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is…
    Curled up with the New York Times, coffee, and a pumpkin muffin.

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals?
    Red Sox. (Alas, the Tigers didn’t make it.)

    4. Favorite inspirational quote?
    “I prayed for years and received no answer. Until I prayed with my legs.” Frederick Douglass (former slave and abolitionist).

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…
    Dancing.

    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want to go)
    New Orleans, New York City, London, Italy, New England

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…
    It was short (my whole life prior to age 18). Worst, the 1980s, when it was asymetrical with bangs! Curly hair is really dreadful with bangs… like a shelf sticking out. Horrible.

    8. If you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?
    Oh, I’d want a diversified farm in Lancaster Co. Pa. (best farmland in the world) and I’d have livestock — heritage breeds — and horses! — and pastured chickens, and vegetables — definitely some root crops, like beets. And orchards. And berry bushes. I’d be totally okay with farming utopia.

    Oh — and I want Jersey cows (highest percentage of milk fat) and milking shorthorns (rugged breed). And mangalitsa pigs.

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?
    Psychology and counseling, because then I’d be more qualified to give advice. (Although no one is stopping me now.)

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?
    Well, not dead yet, I’d invite Aretha Franklin, Stephen Fry, and (dead) the Victorian novelist Wilkie Collins. Let me think about dinner, but dessert would be rhubarb pie. I make a mean rhubarb pie. (No strawberries, that’s sacrilege.)

  • 1. My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is…

    Together for 20 years, 2 kids. Found out he was cheating, then discovered he had been cheating for years. Kicked him out, did a bit of the old dance, handed him divorce papers within 2 months. Took me 2 years to get divorce and he ruined me financially.

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is…

    With the Sunday papers, good food, some sort of exercise.

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals?

    Neither.

    4. Favorite inspirational quote?

    Generally find inspiration quotes cheesy (I think I see too many on FB) but will go with Nora Ephron: ‘Above all, be the heroine of your life, not the victim.’

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…

    Swimming or biking.

    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want to go)

    London, Paris, Florence, Budapest…did I mention London?

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…

    8. If you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?

    I would never be an organic farmer.

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?

    History because I love history.

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?

    Philip Roth (I’d serve liver, naturally)
    Truman Capote (something cold)
    One of the Mitford sisters, possibly Jessica, which means I would serve booze and lots of it.

    I’ll whip up an email in the morning. Too tired right now.

  • 1. My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is…
    STBX told me he was cheating and had been for our whole marriage. Found out I was pregnant with our 3rd thanks to the std test. Kicked him out. Hormones and stupidity allowed him to come back 4 months ago, but he never stopped. Done! Thank god I waited until he moved 20 hours away. Hehehe. processing divorce now.

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is…
    Hiking, wineries with friends…laundry and biking with my kids. Maybe fit in a long run.

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals?
    Don’t want to give away my hometown,but….CARDINALS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    4. Favorite inspirational quote?

    If you dream it, you can do it. Walt Disney

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…

    Running

    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want to go)

    Greece
    Yellowstone
    Appalachian trail
    Denali national Park
    Alaska

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…
    I gave birth to my first. Yikes…

    8. If you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?

    Well, I have an organic veggie garden, but if I didn’t live in the burbs I’d have chickens and cows

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?

    Nutrition and fitness. I am a certified personal trainer, but I work in the finance industry mainly. I have a passion for health and fitness and would love to learn even more.

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?

    Abraham Lincoln
    Helen Keller
    Martin Luther King

    Medium rare filet mignon, roasted Brussel sprouts and baked sweet potato. Spinach salad with gorgonzola, cranberries and my balsamic vinaigrette dressing. Homemade yellow cake with chocolate icing. This is my favorite meal, and I judge people who eat steak cooked higher than medium rare.

  • 1. He reconnected with his high school cheerleader flame via Facebook. Her hubby told me all about it. During marriage counseling, he decided to keep contact with her anyway. He became impatient with me when I became depressed, and angry with the kids when they began to melt down because of all the marital tension. One day we walked out when he called my oldest child (tops in her eighth grade class) “you fucking spoiled brat.” Were those sentences snappy enough?

    2. Hiking, and hanging out near ruins. But in reality, my Sundays are spent either working or studying. Oh well.

    3. I dunno. Red Sox, I guess, because I have ancestors from Boston. But my home team is a rival of the Sox, so I feel conflicted by this question.

    4. How can I only choose one favorite inspirational quote? I have many.

    “Independence I have long considered as the grand blessing of life, the basis of every virtue; and independence I will ever secure by contracting my wants, though I were to live on a barren heath.” (Mary Wollstonecraft, A Vindication of the Rights of Woman, 1792).

    “Whoso would be a man must be a nonconformist. He who would gather immortal palms must not be hindered by the name of goodness. Nothing is at last sacred but the integrity of your own mind. Absolve you to yourself and you shall have the suffrage of the world.” (Ralph Waldo Emerson, “Self Reliance”—this quote was also the personal motto of Frank Lloyd Wright).

    5. Hiking, hands down. I love being outdoors. I suck at competitive sports.

    6. Ireland (been there 3 times), San Francisco (was there this summer), Bath, England (it’s magical…if you are a Jane Austen fan), Alaska (really really wanna go there), Yellowstone National Park (on my bucket list).

    7. Jeez, I don’t know. Did my hair ever look good?

    8. I don’t have much gardening ability, though I grew up on a farm. I want a beehive, because I want free honey so I can make mead. Also, having a beehive would be useful to keep the bratty neighbor kids out of my yard. Yes, I seriously intend to get a beehive within the next year. And yes, I make damn good mead too.

    9. I would go back to school what I am studying now….historic preservation and architectural history. I fantasize about hitting Powerball and redeveloping a blighted neighborhood. I have a whole list of buildings I would buy and rehab. Trouble is, I think my list of buildings is bigger than the amount of money most folks get from winning Powerball 🙁

    10. Ernest Thompson Seton (Canadian founder of the Boy Scouts), J.R.R. Tolkien, and Zora Neale Hurston (an independent woman who never let men hold her back from her dreams). A close fourth would be Thomas Jefferson. This list has changed for me over the years. What would I serve them? What I cook best—homemade bread, venison stew, homemade beer and snickerdoodle cake with cinnamon buttercream frosting.

  • I needed something to do for a Saturday night 🙂

    1. My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is…

    Met. Loved. Children. Cheat. Divorce.

    Prototypical NPD woman that hits late-30’s and decides to fuck her personal trainer, fuck over her husband, and trash the children’s home life. Who needs 5 sentences when we have shared our tears here already?

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is…

    Playing basketball. The faithful are all at Church, so it’s a perfect time. I have my crew of guys that I play with every Sunday morning. Sunday afternoon is either happy that I have my kids for the week, or giving them back to the bitch.

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals?

    San Antonio Spurs. I bleed black and silver.

    4. Favorite inspirational quote?

    “Leave a cheater, gain a life” – but that is kissing ass I suppose. I’ll steal one from Tim Duncan instead (whom by the way just divorced his cheating ass wife)

    “Good, better, best, never let it rest, until your good is better, and your better is your best”.

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…

    Basketball. I want to think, in some illusion of myself, that I can play. I’m really not very good, but this is what I allow myself to enjoy.

    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want to go)

    Hawaii, despite my memories there are with bitch. I would love to go to Italy. I see no point in going to France. Anywhere you want to go, I’m down. Even France. I don’t pretend I am some kind of awesome traveler. The reality is that I have two kids and a job.

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…

    There’s some rather awesome grade school photos where I am sporting a chili bowl haircut from hell.

    8. If you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?

    Don’t get me wrong here, I love me some steak – but I don’t think I could do the deed. So let’s go fruit and nut trees. Fruit because it’s awesome, and nuts for the winter. The “why” is that I’m thinking trees might require less effort that your corn crops and what-not. I could be talked into moving country-side, and at least partially living off the land.

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?

    This is a tough one. I’m not a huge fan of school and/or studying for anything. It would have to be in the sciences… perhaps biology or chemistry. The “why” is because I fancy myself as having some ability to perform sustained research (which contradicts “studying” because it actually has a purpose) and I like to solve puzzles. So helping to discover how to synthesize Prime Rib to go along with my farm-raised nectarines would be cool.

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?

    This is a tough one, but let’s go with Jesus, Mohammad, and some Jewish dude (yeah yeah I know technically speaking…. but go with it).

    I’d serve lots of vodka. Not wine, no fucking about. Vodka. And I would say, fellas, you gotta get your stories all lined up so we don’t spend the next 2,000 years bashing each other about for competing viewpoints on the truth.

    I’d also serve up some of my world famous fake Prime Rib and farm-fresh nectarines.

    In seriousness, I really don’t know who I would like to share a meal with. Perhaps, President Obama. That discussion, there’s a two-wine glass limit. Maybe it’s the Gen-X in me, but I could imagine an intelligent, first-name basis exchange of viewpoints.

      • I just read your blog. What a complete asshole. What a jerk. Young kids, a baby… what a complete fucktard. I mean it’s no fun for any kid of any age, but damn.

        Seriously, baseball is not a sport. It’s just dumb and non-linear. But baseball bats, however, would prove useful because I would really like to break one over your STBX’s head(s) and shove the splinted ends up his ass.

        • Ah, yes. This is the response I usually hear. What still baffles me is how EVERYONE was fooled. His best friend was just at my daughter’s birthday party today. “How do you KNOW it was that many?” Me “he told me. So it’s probably more.” BF “Um…umm…WTF?! But he said he hadn’t spoken to main OW for at least six months.” pull out phone, show screen shot of his call log from the day before he moved across the country, thinking we were going to follow. Show reverse lookup of said number. Show screen shot of FB messages to 2 OW from 2 weeks ago. Pretty sure he’d bring a bat with you.

          But, the day after his lump sum bonus comes in and pays off our debt…bye bye honey. Oh, the house isn’t on the market….opps, did I lie to you…

          • Oh my god. I have gotten ex telling people I’ve ‘exaggerated’ the number of women. And some people are kind of going ‘yeah, well, that sure does seem a bit extreme’. My reaction? Does it really matter if it was 4 or 6 or 10 or however many? The asshole repeatedly cheated on me! Fucking hell, people are idiots sometimes.

            • My ex ADMITTED to sex with hundreds of men, so my assumption is it’s probably close to 1,000. That doesn’t include the women and threesomes, either.

            • His friend was/is just in disbelief that he lies & is doing this. I get it, my husband is really, really sparkly. It still amazes me! everyone else I tell just cant believe someone actually does that. Sadly, being here you see it all the time. Gives me hope that most people are good.

    • Sorry to hear Hawaii has left a bad taste in your mouth–kind of like cheap ass white wine. But we will leave that conversation for another time. I live in Hawaii. If you ever head this way, give me a holler. I know some great places to grab some “pupus” (appetizers) and vodka. I’ll bring the bail money. ha ha.

      • Oh I will!! The lying is hard, not good for my soul. The “I love you’s”, the sexting “BARF!!”, but I just keep telling myself that it’s for a better life on the other side.

        Makes me wonder how these nut jobs can lie so artfully and easily. They are truly disordered

  • 1. My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is…
    Met a man I loved. Married man I loved. Watched man I loved go through an epic alcoholic relapse. Learned as part of the epic relapse he was having an affair with a co-worker. Walked away and never looked back.

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is…
    Farmers Market in the morning. Sunday paper. Nap. Playing my cello.

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals?
    Red Sox

    4. Favorite inspirational quote?
    “Forgiveness is about empowering yourself, rather than empowering your past”

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…
    Rowing. Yoga.

    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are….
    Italy, Hawaii, NYC, San Francisco, Paris

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…
    I had that awesome Dorothy Hamill haircut and everyone thought I was a boy

    8. If you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?

    I shop pretty much exclusively at my local farmers market, and in getting to know the vendors, I have to say I would make organic cheese. The cheese makers are really cool people. And have really good recipe suggestions! Plus they know how to pair it with a wine.

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?
    I already did it! Went back to school to earn an MFA in Production Design because I have a real love of narrative filmmaking. Never turned it into a career because Hollywood proved to be too nutty for me, but I still love production design.

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?
    Grace Kelly, Steve Jobs, Jackie O. I’d serve my famous stuffed meatloaf. Wouldn’t you love to see Grace and Jackie eat meatloaf? I bet they would look really elegant doing it 🙂

    leynicus@gmail.com

      • Had to comment on your comment that the Tigers didn’t make it….I grew up in Michigan and the Tigers are my first love. But I lived in Boston for years before settling in LA, so Red Sox it is! Bostonians have a way of getting in your head 🙂

        • If you hate football in Denver, you have to move. To Kansas.
          I think it is literally in the by laws. smirk.
          However, until Peton Manning came to town I pretty much hated football since John Elway stopped playing. I watched a game last week for the first time in years. Might do it again today, but it is too gorgeous this Sunday.

          Making slow cooked lamb shanks and risotto for dinner.

          Not ready to date. but love reading the ‘profiles’.

  • 1. My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is…

    Married a guy I thought was normal, boy was I wrong. He spent next 20 years screwing every man who held still long enough, then a few women as well. Dumped me in coffee shop. Quit his job to become actor/motivational speaker/author/singer/dancer/comedian/unemployed bum/deadbeat dad/basically homeless guy, leaving me financially devastated. Working on rebuilding my life into something so much better.

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is…
    Go out for breakfast, then a nice day at the zoo, or a garden or somewhere casual and fun.

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals?
    Not a sports fan.

    4. Favorite inspirational quote?
    It is what it is.

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…
    Dancing to 80s music, or walking my dog.

    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want to go)
    San Francisco, Catalina Island, Yellowstone, San Diego, one of those Caribbean all-inclusive resorts.

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…
    Stylist spiral-permed my hair, then teased it into a huge poof of frizzy insanity. I looked just like Magenta from Rocky Horror Picture Show.

    8. If you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?
    I do organic vegetable gardening already. Simple stuff like lettuce, carrots, peas, tomatoes, spinach. If survival depended on it, I’d add some chickens to the mix, and a cow for milk.

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?
    Philosophy because I find that interesting, or something that would lead to a career so I wouldn’t have to worry about money all the time.

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?
    Benjamin Franklin, Leonardo da Vinci, Buddha. I wouldn’t want to worry about cooking and serving, so we’d go to a nice restaurant.

    mitakous@yahoo.com

  • 1. My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is…
    Met the girl of my dreams. Had the career of my dreams. Have 4 wonderful kids. Girl of my dreams morphs into my worst nightmare. I have to replan the rest of my life.
    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is…
    When I was a kid I would goto mass with my Mom then goto the track with my Dad.
    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals?
    Phillies
    4. Favorite inspirational quote?
    The serenity prayer
    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…
    Tennis
    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want to go)
    Paris, Rome, Greece, Chicago, NYC
    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…
    long hair in the 70s
    8. If  you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?
    I would starve unless I could grow a Hershey bar tree.
    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?
    MBA
    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?
    Abraham Lincoln, JFK, and James Baker. It would have to be steak and red wine.

    • Hahaha…’I would starve unless I could grow a hershey bar on a tree’. Made my morning. I’m more partial to other kinds of chocolate but wholeheartedly agree with the sentiment.

  • zyx321 can be reached at: icelandic_dreaming at hotmail dot com

    1) married my high school sweetheart. Found my dream job and have two wonderful children. Turns out gut instinct was correct, ex husband had cheated early on, then cheated at the end while I supported him as he undertook his dream job away from the family.

    2) hiking

    3) this is tough: I am an American League girl (Kansas City Royals, baby!), but my team is out, so I am rooting for the Cardinals because I have attended many games in St Louis.

    4) quote: proverb from the Sanskrit
    Look to this day,
    The very life of life,
    In its brief course lies all,
    The realities and verities of existence,
    The bliss of growth,
    The splendor of action,
    The glory of power.
    For yesterday is but a dream,
    And tomorrow is only a vision.
    But today well lived,
    Makes every yesterday
    A dream of happiness
    And every tomorrow
    A vision of hope.
    Look well, therefore,
    To this day.

    5) favoritebother activity–running in the rain

    6) favorite travel spots:
    Been to: Ireland, Germany, New Zealand,
    Wanna go to: Iceland/Greenland and Tanzania/Kenya

    7) worst hair:
    when i was in kindergarten the beauty school student messed up and cut it too short… Traumatized by being called a boy in the girls restroom

    8) organic farming: tomatoes, onions, and chili peppers.. Gotta have my salsa!

    9) geology

    10) Historical figures: this is tough…
    Lief Ericsson, Teddy Roosevelt, and Ernest Shackleton (though he was a cheater):
    I like explorers….

    Dinner: an Ethiopian feast: injera bread, peas, lentils, chicken stew, and beef

      • Glad others like it, too. I made some for the first time a couple of weeks away.
        If you guys are ever out on the left coast we’ll have to grab some!
        …and it is the only time I eat collard greens 😉

  • email: donwitnow@gmail.com

    Just for fun 🙂

    1. My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is…
    Married, found out sxh was sleeping with his boss, kicked him out and am living happily ever after 

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is…
    Demolishing a wall, building a new wall, baking, cooking, jogging with the dog, movies in jammies with the kids

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals?
    Not a sports fan

    4. Favorite inspirational quote?
    Albert Einstein “ Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results”

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…
    Bouldering, working on my house, jogging with the dog

    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want to go)
    Anywhere warmer than where I am (I’m in the cold prairies), Florida, Vancouver, Europe (just about anywhere)

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…
    Almost all of the 80’s and 90’s

    8. If you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?
    Fruits & veggies – in our climate, it would probably be greenhouse and outdoor combo so I could earn a living.

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?
    I think I would continue to my PhD and finish a law degree – teach law and accounting (yep, very boring)

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?
    Gloria Steinam, Queen Victoria, Alexander the Great – I’d make sure to ask about dietary restrictions, then do a buffet to cover everyone’s preferences.

  • Not looking to meet a new romantic partner, but thought it would be fun to answer the questions.

    1. My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is:
    We met in high school.
    We endured a crazy, intense, passionate, miserable phase of living together for many years.
    We married at 35 years old.
    He left me for his perfect soul mate in May 2012 when we were 43 (they are no longer together).
    He probably cheated on me throughout the entire relationship.

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is:
    In summer it might be working in the garden during the day, later grilling a nice dinner that includes something fresh-picked, then sitting back with a glass of wine to watch the daylight fade. In the winter, I might be doing some kind of house project, or something creative. Cooking and nesting type stuff.

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals?
    Chicago Cubs!

    4. Favorite inspirational quote?
    You get what you settle for.

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is:
    Hiking or biking or kayaking out in nature. I was a national park ranger for several years. I like to be outside.

    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are:
    The Pacific Northwest (where I was a park ranger)
    Europe – like France or Italy, someplace with a slow food culture
    Central America – like Costa Rica, or maybe an old Spanish colonial city in Mexico
    India – very drawn to the culture, the food, the religions, the beautiful fabrics, the bubbly accent!
    Any little road trip around the Midwest, where I live. Lots of places to explore.

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when:
    I went through a home perm phase in junior high. It started shortly after I got my mullet. So for a while there in the early 80s I had a home-permed mullet. No one’s hair has ever looked worse than that. Ever.

    8. If you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why?
    I love Michael Pollan.
    Anyway, I am a big gardener. I would grow herbs, and learn to use them not only for food but for medicinal purposes too. Basil, dill, lovage, hissop, tarragon, thyme, yarrow… and cool heirloom tomatoes and peppers and shell beans and gorgeous purple cabbage. And I’d have chickens!

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?
    I just finished up school to become a nurse and am in the process of interviewing for a nurse residency program. In a few years, I plan to go back to get an advanced practice degree in neuro intensive care.

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?
    This question of having dinner with historical figures has been put to me before, and I always get stuck on the social aspect of it. This is a much different question than, say, “who would you most want to audit a class from?” I only want to have dinner with fun, chatty, sociable people. And I can’t be so in awe of them that I am too nervous to eat. For example, Mother Theresa seems like an amazing historic figure, but what the heck am I going to say to her over bruschetta?
    I’m thinking I’d invite Mark Twain, Eleanor Roosevelt, and Julia Child. That should be a pretty fun party. I’d serve barbecued ribs and corn on the cob, because we are all just folks.

  • ere’s the Questionnaire:

    1. My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is…
    Married for 22 years, separated for almost 2years. H had an affair with a Married co-worker, (20 yrs younger) he says 2-3 year EA and 1 Yr. PA . She befriended me and came for dinner multiple times – during this time.

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is…
    Going to quaint little towns for a Sunday stroll on beautiful days, or just hang at home reading the paper, going for a nice walk/hike. Cooking nice roasts in the fall.

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals?
    Red Sox

    4. Favorite inspirational quote?
    “I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”
    ― Maya Angelou

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…
    walking in great parks

    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want to go)
    Portugal – been to, would love to go Italy and Paris

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…
    In early 90’s, I was in my early 20’s and had it short like an old lady!

    8. If you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?
    I would grow, fresh vegetables – lettuce, potatoes, tomatoes – basically – the vegetables we would eat on a daily basis.

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?
    Business management/open a small busines. I would love to have my own little shop, with the best cheeses, my homemade soups, my sought after cookies, and just little treasures from Europe.

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?
    George Bush – well, I didn’t like him as president, but find that he’s funny and great husband and Dad.
    Oprah – well I love her. And would love to feed her dinner.
    DelaiLama – I just love to listen to him.
    I would have to serve them some of my best Portuguese dishes and some vegetarian dishes. All healthy stuff of course!

    finallymovingon@gmail.com

  • 1. My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is…

    We loved. I got sick. He cheated. I kicked him out and divorced. Im recuperating.

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is…

    Hanging with the kid outdoors, at a concert, farmers market, car show, etc.

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals?

    Love my BoSox

    4. Favorite inspirational quote?

    “I envy the cup of coffee that gets to kiss your sleepy lips awake every cold and bitter morning.”
    “We meet no ordinary people in our lives. If you give them a chance, everyone has something amazing to offer.”
    “My feet hurt from kicking so much ass.”
    “They told me that to make her fall in love, I had to make her laugh. But every time she laughs, I’m the one who falls in love.”
    “We can complain because rose bushes have thorns, or rejoice because thorn bushes have roses.”

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…

    Belly dancing, with bike riding a close second

    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want to go)

    Have always wanted to visit Egypt, Greece, and Asia. Loved exploring Venice, backpacking through Central America, and living in Africa

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…

    I was too sick to wash and style my hair. Fortunately, that’s not a problem anymore 😉

    8. If you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?

    I organic gardening. Currently have several fruit trees and am getting ready to plant winter vegetables and herbs including lettuce, carrots, radishes, maybe cabbage and mint, thyme, rosemary, parsley, and basil.

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?

    Prefer learning by doing.

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?

    I’d invite Eleanor Roosevelt, Buddha, and Jimi Hendrix (mostly for his music). Would serve wine, cheese, and a baguette.

  • Too soon to think about dating – I’m still working on myself – but thought I’d answer just for the heck of it. It’s been fun reading about everyone!

    1. My chump story in 5 not-so-snappy sentences is…
    Married 36 years had our ups and downs, three great kids, a house almost paid for, retirement a decent possibility. He told me he “wasn’t happy with the way things were going” and moved out. Ten months later I found out he had immediately moved in with his OW and I realized to my horror that I’d been chumped. Worst year of my life. Things much, much better now and I wait impatiently for the divorce to be finalized so I can get on with all the great stuff I want to do.

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is…sleep in, then get outside.

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals? Hockey is the only real team sport, sorry. Montreal Canadiens fan from way back.

    4. Favorite inspirational quote? Not a quote but a person – Ed Whitlock. 82 years old and he just ran the Toronto Marathon in 3.41. Wow. That’s what I want to be doing when I’m 82!

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…running.

    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want to go) Montreal, Discovery Islands off the BC coast, Berlin, New Zealand, Iceland.

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…1982. New Wave. Nuff said.

    8. If  you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever? It would have to be berries for me – I’d love a huge raspberry/loganberry/blueberry farm. I’d eat them every day, fresh and frozen.

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why? Archeology. I’m fascinated with history and the tangible objects that survive it.

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve? Rosalind Franklin (who should have been recognized for discovering DNA along with Watson and Crick), Emily Carr, and Admiral Edward Pellew, First Viscount Exmouth. Dinner would be planked sockeye salmon, new potatoes, the first of the asparagus, with rhubarb cobbler or maybe pie and home made ice cream for dessert (and I’m with you on that, CL – no strawberries!). And a nice wine, of course. Or a good local microbrew.

    • Go Rosalind Franklin! She should have won the Nobel Prize too. If you want to see what a sexist jerk James Watson was, read what he had to say about her in The Double Helix.

        • OK what I meant to say was that when you read the book I think it says way more about Watson than anyone he actually worked with. He was a sexist jerk. Sadly, that attitude still persists in the sciences, particularly in academia. I can only admire how Franklin kept her temper and managed such fine work in spite of it all.

    • Exrepeatedmeme… We should run around Iceland and Berlin. I’ll teach you archaeology, and pay me in berries 😉
      An aside, Rosalind Franklin deserved so much better, all around.

  • 1. My chump story in 5 (not so) snappy sentences

    Met what I thought was a sensitive wonderful man. Married for 26 years, with 4 children, one (mine) from a prior relationship. Openly began cheating with a woman from his past who had pursued him (through her several marriages) for over 20 years. Discovered he had been cheating for years and at suggestion of children, moved out. Rebuilding my life and starting to find myself again.

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is –

    Taking a walk to get coffee and some type of decadent pastry, coming back and watching tawdry (think “Snapped”) or old school mystery series (think Perry Mason) programming while relaxing on anything big and comfortable. Sometimes I throw in church and/or brunch.

    3. Red Sox or Cardinals

    Midwest girl – Cardinals

    4. Favorite Inspirational Quote

    There are many, but right now Maya Angelou’s “When Someone Shows You Who They Are, Believe Them,” says it all.

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is –

    Walking. I can walk for miles. It is what I think of as active meditation.

    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want to go)

    Paris, New York, Sausalito – I would love to visit Hawaii and Italy. Anywhere really – I love seeing new places.

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…

    I’ve learned to love and appreciate my hair no matter what it looks like.

    8. If you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?

    I would love to learn how to farm, but I think I might have a brown thumb. However, if I could get that treated, I would grow spinach, brussel sprouts, kale, collard greens, carrots, sweet potatoes, mushrooms, beets and corn.

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?

    Psychology and History. Psychology because I think I may have a knack for it and I would like to help women who have been abused and History because I’ve always loved history – real history, not just what you learn in school, which is someone’s poor interpretation of events more often than not.

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?

    Eleanor Roosevelt
    Mahatma Mohandas Gandhi
    Malcolm X

    I think these three people would provide truly stimulating conversation and points of view.
    I would serve baked turkey with homemade stuffing, homemade macaroni and cheese, sweet potatoes, cranberries, a green salad with a raspberry vinaigrette dressing and homemade corn muffins. For dessert there would be sweet potato pie and peach cobbler. I would make some brown rice with scallions, peas and broccoli, lightly seasoned as an alternative for the Mahatma.

    chumpprincess@gmail.com

  • 1. My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is…
    Married 14 years. Wasted 14 years on him not me. Affair began. Divorce began. Rebuilding ongoing.

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is…
    Swim, brunch and baking with my girl.

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals?
    ? Does rugby league count?

    4. Favorite inspirational quote?
    “Just do it”.

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…
    Swimming and Pilates.

    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want to go)
    New York, Cuba, Turkey, Cornwall and The Yorkshire Dales.

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…
    80’s perm (uh)!

    8. If you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?
    I would have sheep and chicken, all organic veg and fruit and have a small tea shop selling homemade cakes and English tea.

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?
    Marine biology. I love the other worldliness of diving.

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?
    Nelson Mandela, Adolf Hitler and Stephen Fry.
    Traditional roast, organic veg and dark chocolate mousse.

      • Stephen Fry is of course a staple on tv over here in the UK so I’ve pretty much grown up with him. Amazing guy.
        That was my exact reason behind inviting both him and Hitler (who has to be the ultimate narcissist)!
        Sparkled to an entire nation!
        Mandela is there as I’m sure he could offer plenty of advice on over coming adversity and how to not lose faith.
        Nothing for Hitler to eat, though I’m sure I could warm the oven for the bastard!

  • 1.320 text messages.Who is this? Iwant tomarry her, Ok, see a lawyer. Husband too lazy. Still here.
    2. Sept-Feb. Football March to Aug open to suggestion
    3. Red Soxs
    4. A yogi in the Jungle need never fear the tiger
    5. Walking the dog/hiking
    6. Hawaii, British Isle, Paris, Italy, Yellowstone National Park
    7.Dyed my hair blonde as a teenager. Got tired of doing it. Let it grow out 2 toned ash brown and red for about 1 yr. Actually I suffer from hair envy. Almost everyone’hair looks better than mine!
    8. Have black thumb. Too much work. Where is the nearest farmer’s market?
    9. Art History
    10. St. Paul, Queen Elizabeth the 1st, Thomas Jefferson.
    Pasta,salad,peach pie.

  • 1. My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is…
    Spackle queen from 1995 when our first son was born and he moved out of our bedroom because “it’s hard to sleep with a newborn.” Spent 18 years wondering why he was so odd, cold, distant, cruel and evasive when asked direct questions. He belittled me and my profession when I went back to University in 2007 for my master’s degree. Found out about the cheating and knew I was done sucking it up. After two miserable, eye-opening years, I am officially divorced and moving away from his orbit and my spineless self.
    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is…
    Going to “church” with our newly-adopted, three-year old beagle (my “church” is outdoors, and currently a lovely 2.5 mile hike around a beautiful pond), then coming home, making Sunday dinner for my kids and friends, catching up with friends and watching movies or football.
    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals?
    Red Sox. Love that dirty water! I made one of my dreams come true this past September when I took all three sons to a game at Fenway Park.
    4. Favorite inspirational quote?
    I have a number that inspire me or crack me up. But this one seems to speak to me most these days post-divorce… “Live without pretending. Love without depending. Listen without defending. Speak without offending.” -Drake
    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…
    Walking with friends, body surfing, dancing
    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want to go)
    The California coast (Big Sur is breathtaking). Austin, Texas (music). Michigan (lakes) Grand Canyon (because the Brady Bunch made it the place to go when I was a kid), Hawaii (Elvis’ old movies)
    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…
    In the fall of 1983, I asked the hairdresser for a trim of my long hair, and got some goofball Flock of Seagulls look. Hated it and hated her for that.
    8. If you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?
    Vegetables, apples and chickens.
    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?
    I want to get my CAGS in juvenile advocacy. I see so much as a guidance counselor, and would like to be in a position where I could serve children and write policy that would promote researched-based, proven family crisis interventions instead of the current system where we put these troubled children through the pipeline to prison while Mom drinks her life away.
    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?
    Jesus, Thomas Jefferson and Benjamin Franklin. I’d make a pot roast and listen to them talk about our world today and how we could improve human relationships. Then we would watch the Patriots game and I’d serve beer (Jesus must be so sick of wine now).

    chutesandladderschump@gmail.com

    • Live without pretending. Love without depending. Listen without defending. Speak without offending.” -Drake

      Great quote.

    • I see a theme emerging here with the 1980s and bad hair. Maybe it’s our age, or maybe the 1980s was just a really bad hair decade.

      And Ben Franklin liked beer! I think he’d thank Jesus for it, personally. Didn’t Franklin say Beer is God’s way of showing us that he loves us? or something like that…

      • It was a bad hair decade for 20-somethings.

        Rockers? Black hair dye (Jet Black), half a can of Aquanet and a ratting comb.

        Punks? Spiked mohawks, pick a color.

        Trendies: a strand of hairs longer than the others or braided into a tail, hair spray while hanging head upside down, ratting comg.

        ??? : Mullets and Members Only jackets.

        Etc, etc. How bad was hair in the 1980?

        Remember: “A Flock of Seagulls”, “Ratt”, and the “Thompson Twins”?

        A decade in which Robert Smith had the most reasonable haircut.

        1980s Hair

  • Here’s the Questionnaire:

    1. My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is…

    Much happier not dealing with irrationality and periodic affairs begun online via Facebook. Not much else to say about that.

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is…

    Depends on time of year and what else happened that week. Today, hanging out with my dogs, walking, ducked out of a group hike because I wanted to sleep in after a long work week.

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals?

    Not a big sports fan. Can take it or leave it. No tribal affiliations.

    4. Favorite inspirational quote?

    “If a problem is fixable, if a situation is such that you can do something about it, then there is no need to worry. If it’s not fixable, then there is no help in worrying. There is no benefit in worrying whatsoever.” – Dalai Lama XIV

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…

    Walking, hiking, biking.

    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want to go).

    4 Places I’ve been to where I’d like to return some day outside the US: Paris, Heidelberg, Munich, Montreal.

    5 Places in the US I’d like to visit: Sequoia National Forest, NYC, Boston, San Francisco, Hudson Valley.

    Some day…if I can get somebody I trust to watch my dogs, I’d really like to visit some places in Asia and around the Mediterranean, oh and maybe Minsk, and … (sigh… so many places).

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…

    Pick any time in the early-to-mid 1980s. Pick a color. Pick a gel or a can of industrial hair spray or a ratting comb for that matter.

    8. If you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?

    Agriculture is hard work. Spent my Summers in my youth raking almonds, picking potatoes, and so on. In my Utopia, somebody else does that. Hey, I’m living in my Utopia 🙂 Don’t get me wrong, I have house plants and a yard. I like plants. Growing them as a food supply, however, is just plain hard manual labor.

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?

    Immunology and Directed Evolution. Or… Ancient Near Eastern History, or… (ok, this is going to turn out like the Travel section. There are too many possibilities, and there is only one me, and only so many years).

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?

    Hmm, Having a hard time getting past the “but I can’t have 3 historic figures to dinner” part.

    Douglas Adams, Buckminster Fuller, and Eric Idle (still living): Cheeseburgers, and everybody would have to wear very tiny hats.

  • 1. My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is…

    I thought I’d met and married “the one”; we were college sweethearts. Instead, I spackled a man who I wanted to see as the right one and tried to focus on the good in him rather than acknowledging the bad. I found out two years ago that he had joined Ashley Madison and was having a LD affair with something he met on there. I then finally had the blinders removed and saw him for what he was. I told him I wanted a D five days after DDay, and I don’t regret it one bit.

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is…

    …reading a book and enjoying a good cup of coffee.

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals?

    What are these sports that you keep alluding to? I know not of them. 😀

    4. Favorite inspirational quote?

    I have many, but I love the sentiment found in Thoreau’s Walden: “Simplicity, simplicity, simplicity! I say, let your affairs be as two or three, and not a hundred or a thousand; instead of a million count half a dozen, and keep your accounts on your thumb nail.”

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…

    …taking walks, especially in scenic areas.

    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want to go)
    I have a hybrid list:
    1. Scotland– I will go back some day!
    2. England/Wales
    3. Chautauqua Institution (WNY)
    4. New England– went to Vermont briefly many years ago and want to go back and see everything else!
    5. I’d love to see several other major US cities: Boston, Philadelphia, Chicago

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…

    I tried to curl my hair in 9th grade for my school picture. I ended up with this messy bush of hair that has been captured for posterity, and my siblings STILL tease me about it! 😀

    8. If you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?

    I would definitely grow my own tomatoes. They taste so much better than the stuff you can buy at stores. I’d have an apple orchard of Maccoun apples for eating and maybe Cortlands for baking. I’d grow pumpkins simply because I love most everything pumpkin. Probably strawberries and blueberries. I think I’d do okay if I actually put the time and effort into a garden; I grew a little bit this year, but I’d like to try for more next year.

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?

    Philosophy and religion– both are hugely influential in literature, and having a more deeply-rooted background in both would probably make me a better teacher.

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?

    Charlotte Bronte (who wrote my all-time favorite book, Jane Eyre), Benjamin Franklin (because I find him both brilliant and funny), and James Abbott McNeill Whistler (because he’s my favorite artist). We’d all have soup and homemade rolls because that is the ultimate warm, feel-good meal that I think puts people at ease (not too pretentious or formal) and encourages comfortable conversation.

    I can be reached at movingonchump at gmail dot com.

  • 1. My chump story in 5 snappy sentences
    Gonna break the rules and go for a haiku:

    Devoted in love
    trusting, forgiving, my fault
    seventeen lovers

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is…
    If I have the kids, whatever makes them feel appy. If not, with the. Game of the week in Civilization Revolution.

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals?
    I don’t own any red sox, and think cardinals are very pretty to look at.

    4. Favorite inspirational quote?
    The most insidious encroachments on liberty are by (persons) of zeal, but without understanding.

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…
    Home construction projects.

    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want go to).
    Travel is of little interest to me.

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…
    I wake up with nad scientist hair every morning..

    8. If you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?

    Anything but asparagus. I love asapragus, but it is a pain in the arse to grow.

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?
    Psychology, becausr I may change careers, physics, because the key to understanding creation is out there.

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?

    tex-mex… because it is the greatest thing mankind ever created. And, I’d invite Julius Caesar, Alexander the Great, and either Jesus or Agamemnon… because they fascinate me

    Necrosteve@gmail.com

  • I’ll play!

    1. My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is…

    He was my first love. He cheated on me when I was at home with our two year old and 4 month old sons. I gave him a chance but he wouldn’t fire his assistant/AP so I packed his bags, brought them to their place of work, and dumped them all over HER car. Ha!

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is… sleeping in, drinking a latte, going to the playground with my boys, making us a nice dinner, maybe getting in a run

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals? No opinion, I live in neither of these places and only follow football

    4. Favorite inspirational quote? I’m not a quote person. I’ve read/heard many quotes that speak to me in the moment, but I don’t revisit them, so forget them.

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is… hot yoga

    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want to go)

    the North Carolina beaches, need to get back to Paris and also see more of the French countryside, want to see NYC at Christmas, ski out West, and take my kids to Disney World and stay in one of their ridiculous (ridiculously awesome?) resorts.

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…

    In college, I went to a strip mall hair place and said I wanted to “be blond”. I have dark brown hair. They convinced me to “only” get some big chunky blond highlights. After looking like a zebra for a few weeks… I spent what was big money to me on that at the time… I finally sucked it up and paid to get my hair dyed back.

    8. If you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?

    I guess I would have to go livestock because I might starve if forced to garden. I’m going to hope I never have to live in a world like this!

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?

    Apparently accounting, since that is what I’m doing. But if I didn’t have to worry about getting a job out of the deal, I would study creative writing, maybe with a side of sociology.

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?

    Jane Austen
    William Shakespeare
    Oscar Wilde

    I think these people (or at least 2 out of 3) may be hard to please… maybe something comforting but sophisticated like osso buco served with risotto… and lots of wine!

    chumpyae@gmail.com

    • Wilde would be happy with a good wine, or a steong spirit. He might wish you had some absinth or laudnum though.

    • Ooh, Oscar Wilde is a good choice. I think I might have Stephen Fry and Oscar Wilde but then they’d probably just talk to one another… it would be a total charm onslaught.

  • I’m better at being single for the moment. But I appreciate seeing all the great guys on here so I don’t get too jaded.

    1. My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is…

    Met at work, I just knew I could save him from his depression after he divorced his cheating wife. He was so attentive. 18 months later I find he’s dating other people despite the ‘let’s be exclusive’ talk we had. Guess it was a one sided conversation. He wanted to see what it felt like on the other side. I wish he would have told me.

    New rule: never date newly divorced men.

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is…

    With people. With books. With wine. Cooking. Outdoors. Sunday’s are wonderful

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals?

    Not a big fan of organized sports.
    I do like watching little kids play sports though, so cute.

    4. Favorite inspirational quote?
    “If you are going through hell, keep going.” Winston Churchill.

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…

    Walking. Especially in beautiful natural places. But also in cities and small towns.

    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want to go)
    Toulouse and Southwest France (oh the food); been once, will go again.
    Hawaii, go every 2 years. Love it.
    Santa Fe, NM – short drive from Denver (so easy and beautiful)
    Anywhere Italian
    Napa and vineyards everywhere

    Would like to go someday:
    Spain

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…

    I let my mom do it. And I have grade school pictures to prove it.

    8. If you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?

    I wouldn’t survive. However, I love tomatos and herbs. I’d at least try if forced.

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?

    Somelier. Might do it too. (I already have a B.S. and a graduate level project management degree). Time for some fun.

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?

    Elizabeth the first, and her father King Henry VIII (I would love to hear that conversation between them as two adults. She’d knock his socks off I thnk.)
    Eleanor Roosevelt. (separate from the above, though she might think it interesting as well).

    I’d serve them anything they wanted. I love to cook. It would definitely be at least 4 courses.

  • CL, how could you do this now? I just filled out profiles on two dating sites last week, I’m burnt out!

    I loved reading all the entries and BTW, I went on my first date in 19 years last night. Well, not technically a date, my first meeting with someone from a dating site. I then went to a bar alone, flirted and played pool. First time in years, I wasn’t sure I knew how to flirt anymore, or that anyone would flirt back, but I did and they did and I had a great time. I felt so confident and happy, it really was amazing how easy it was to talk to people and have a great time.

      • thanks ya’ll!

        anothererica, exactly right!

        chumpttny, 17 yrs in a relationship, took two years to get over the PTSD issues and get enough solitude to the point where I wanted to go out with anyone. Don’t be sad for me. AND you can do it too, go girl, once you make yourself actually go out there you will have a good time 🙂

        Vivianne, awesome, rock the house!

  • Thanks, this was fun, and a welcome distraction from work I should be doing.
    My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is…
    Boy meets girl. Boy and girl fall in love, get married. Boy emotionally disappears after baby #1. Girl spackles like mad during baby #2 and #3. The End.

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is . . .
    Farm market, a little yardwork, then biking/walking with kids or yoga/standup paddleboarding when alone. NAP! Novel, tea. Family movie, tuck everyone in. Once all is quiet, soak in bathtub and paint fingers and toes bright colors while watching BBC drama.

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals?
    Last organized sports I really followed were the Bulls in the 90s and figure skating through about 2002.

    4. Favorite inspirational quote?
    My own suspicion is that the universe is not only queerer than we suppose, but queerer than we can suppose. J.B.S. Haldane

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…
    Dancing of many kinds.

    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want to go)
    Venice, Italy. Edinburgh, Scotland. New York.
    Want to visit Maui and France.

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…
    The 80’s. Bad decade.

    8. If you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?
    I have a mostly organic garden; done well with tomatoes, squash, herbs, raspberries, leafy greens. Would like to be more successful at peas and beans, and add some fruit trees.
    If I had space, I’d love a couple of goats and sheep and a sweet Jersey or Guernsey. Chickens if I could get someone else to do most of the work; the smell bothers me. I suppose a pig would be useful too.

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?
    I’m getting a masters in public health right now and love being back in school. If I could career shift for fun without regarding making a living, I’d get a performance degree in early and folk music.

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?
    Medieval-Renaissance Girl’s Night Out with Eleanor of Aquitaine (the original super mom), Catherine of Aragon (The Constant Princess has great stories about her early life, and she is a sister chump), and Julian of Norwich (medieval feminist/mystic). I’m not cooking, we’re going out and eating tapas and drinking many pitchers of sangria.

  • 1. My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is…

    Am Indian Professor set to divorce (by mutual agreement as otherwise it is tough in India) my serial cheater Indian STBX, who has lost his job for sexual harassment (a coveted job). Taking care of my 14 year old intelligent son, without any spousal support or joint custody. The cheating, abuse and abandonment are seeming to be fading into history, now. Got immense support from people surrounding me in getting out of the rut. Am looking forward to life at 39, with a lot of dreams.

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is…

    Waking up late, chit-chat with family, son and then get into reading one of those Enid Blyton’s from my son’s closet. And lots of tea off course.

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals?

    Neither a sports fan nor they are so popular in India

    4. Favorite inspirational quote?

    It is a Hindi Song:
    I went on being with life,
    I went on smoking out all my worries,
    There was no use trying to cry over all the devastation,
    I went on partying over my devastation,
    There is a point where one can’t feel the difference between sadness or happiness,
    I went on bringing my heart to that point.

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…

    walking, especially in scenic areas.

    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want to go)

    Toronto (to spend a few years of my life), and so many places

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…

    I was a teenager

    8. If you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?

    Livestock. I am an animal lover. Tell me that I don’t have to give them away for their meat. Have lot of milk and wool. I absolutely would love to be among animals.

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?

    I am still studying.

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?

    Mahatma Gandhi
    Mother Teresa
    Akbar

    I can be reached at asmita.smriti@yahoo.com

    • Oooh love the choice of song Anudi ! Har fikr ko dhuen mein udata chala gayya …….

      Dinner with akbAr should be quite cool …. Maybe he can tell you about all his times with birbal lol !

  • Ok, can’t imagine dating pregnant or while living with my parents but I’ll answer for fun!

    1.My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is…
    Met the man of my dreams. Two wonderful stepkids. Got married and pregnant. Found out he was hooking up on craigslist and other adult meetup sites. Promptly moved out of state to live with family and now am awaiting baby and divorce.
    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is…
    sleeping in or going to really good breakfast and coffee with fam or friends, or Chinese or Sushi or cooking a great meal (I like food). I also like going to a movie and/or watching The Walking Dead. I like laid back Sundays.
    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals?
    Um..Seahawks? Although I have been to a few Mariners games.
    4. Favorite inspirational quote?
    It’s not your beliefs that make you a better person, it’s your actions.
    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…
    walking in nature
    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want to go)
    I love all of the outdoors places I’ve been to in the Northwest (especially Breitenbush Hot Springs and Skagit Valley but would really like to go to Mexico during El Dia De Los Muertos, and explore Pompeii and Greece.
    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…
    I decided to go from dyed black hair to a lighter color by bleaching. You know the haircolor Milla Jovovich had in the 5th element? Yeah I had that, white-yellow roots, bright orange in the middle and darker tips.
    8. If you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?
    I’d grow pumpkins and herbs and raise corgis. Ok, let’s be honest. I love the idea of growing herbs but I absolutely suck at gardening. But I think I could get away with pumpkins. And corgis are just ridiculously cute. By the way I loved “The Omnivore’s Dilemma” and would be perfectly happy hunting wild pigs and gathering mushrooms.
    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?
    Either Naturopathic Medicine or a PhD in Psychology. Because I find them both fascinating and would like to do something that makes a positive difference in other people’s lives. Either way I need to finish my bachelors degree first.
    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?
    Isaac Asimov, The Dalai Lama and Jesus. Because that ought to be a fascinating discussion to watch. I guess I’d serve whatever Isaac Asimov likes because I would hope the Dalai Lama wouldn’t be picky and I have no idea how to make food from 2000 years ago.
    Email is ChumpKat @ Gmail .com

  • 1. My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is…

    Married 28 years with 3 kids. We weren’t like newlyweds but I loved my life and my husband a lot. Shocked when husband got up one morning and wanted marriage counseling but I said OK. More shock and awe when I got home from work that night and he had already packed up and moved out. I found the hotel bills, jewelry bills, etc., three weeks later and filed for divorce immediately.

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is…

    Posting on Chump Lady? No, usually more like going for a long walk outdoors and making a good meal for my family if any of them are in town.

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals?

    Tigers next year with a healthy Cabrera.

    4. Favorite inspirational quote?

    Life is what happens when you’re busy making plans.

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…

    Tennis

    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want to go)

    Any US or Canadian national park, Berlin, Chicago, Hawaii, Puerto Rico.

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…

    I woke up this morning. Could be worse tomorrow, though.

    8. If you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?

    Arugula because nothing (no squirrels, rabbits, etc.) eats it except for me and I could eat it by the boatload, never gain a pound and die happy.

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?

    Uh, no thanks. I went to four years of college and three years of law school (which for some scary reason I liked) and that’s enough for me.

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?

    I’d invite Ted Cruz, John Boehner and (I hate to say it because I want to like him) Barack Obama, and I’d serve nothing because my cook is furloughed.

    Sorry I’m not leaving an email, but I have a boyfriend right now and am not dating anyone else (how chumpy) but this sounded sort of fun. So is having a boyfriend who treats you well, so go for it, all of you.

  • This could be interesting

    1. My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is…

    I moved to his country in order for him to finish his MA, then we were to move back to the US. The time on this was to be five years max. Eleven years later, no degree, he has drinking and cheating issues and we’re still living there. After being asked to leave, son and I came back home to start over. Divorce soon to be final.

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is…

    Relaxing with either media binge-watching or a good book.

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals?

    Does it help that I at least know they are baseball teams? lol

    4. Favorite inspirational quote?

    “Courage is not the absence of fear or despair; it is the capacity to continue on despite them, no matter how great or overwhelming they become.”- Robert Fanney

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…

    Walking

    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want to go)

    Maine
    Vermont
    Lake District, England
    Paris
    Prince Edward Island

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…

    I have straight fine hair. It was down to my waist, spiral perms had just come in and I really liked the look. So I went in to a stylist who managed to burn my hair off in chunks. Not a really good look lol

    8. If you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?

    I’d grow whatever I could keep alive – I have a rather black thumb. But I couldn’t do livestock as they would end up with names and as pets.

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?

    I love books, I’d love to study writing and literature – just for the fun of it.

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?

    Mark Twain, Katharine Hepburn, Neil Gaiman. Dinner would be what I do best – good old-fashioned farm cooking and tons of it.

    midwest4163 at gmail.com

    • A big apology to anyone who emailed – was in the middle of reading one when things went ‘poof’ and the entire contents of that email folder disappear to never be found again 😮 So I’m not ignoring anyone, just can’t reply as I no longer have the email 🙁

      It’s been that sort of week . . . lol

  • I could not resist, much more fun than dating site profiles, except for the first question.

    1. My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is…
    Guy is hot, charming and considerate, 5 years later woman finds guy cheats and he is very sorry, woman forgives & trusts again. Years later guy convinces woman to marry him, shit goes downhill from there, guy starts drinking again. 12 years later, woman discovers cheating, finally says time to divorce, guy escalates emotional abuse/rages to the physical, guy goes to rehab. Woman insists on divorce, guy agrees to mediation, same day guy threatens to kill himself and and woman while brandishing a loaded gun. Protective order, PTSD, divorce, therapy, and now living a life worth living.

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is…
    Chilling out watching the birds in summer while sorta reading a book and in winter, actually reading a book in front of a fire. (there are more interesting things to do in front of a fire if you have company)

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals?
    No, but I’ll cheer the opposing team so you have the sports conflict you crave.

    4. Favorite inspirational quote?
    “If you lay down, you die” My Dad

    “The more you love, the more you can love–and the more intensely you love. Nor is there any limit on how many you can love. If a person had time enough, he could love all of that majority who are decent and just.” Robert A. Heinlein

    “I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.” Frank Herbert

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…
    Swimming, dancing and foosball

    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want to go)
    Saint Martin (the French side), Cozumel and Alaska. I want to visit Italy and the Scottish Higlands – hell I want to visit Europe. Let’s not forget Africa, a safari, only I think I want to be carried like a Queen of Egypt

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…
    I got talked into a perm at 15, naturally curly/kinky haired people should NEVER do this! Little Orphan Annie anyone?

    8. If you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?
    I totally have gardening ability but I wouldn’t like eating nothing but veggies, I respect hunters because I eat animals but I’d have a hard time killing them myself, sooooo… I think Michael Pollan would approve of my growing the ingredients and brewing beer to serve in my own tavern. I would barter beer for my food (and goose down for my mattress). No doubt I’d end up with a organic beer franchise and retire early 🙂

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?
    I would end up taking classes in a variety of subjects, my curiosity is still boundless. If I was going for a degree it would be in animal behavior sciences.

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?
    Thomas Jefferson, Robert Heinlein and Hillary Clinton (if I could sneak in a 4th it would be Eleanor Roosevelt). With this kind of company, who wants to cook? I’d do a picnic outside so I wouldn’t miss a bit of the conversation – fried chicken, potato salad and lots of appetizers, things you can make ahead.

    datdamwuf2 at hotmail dot com

  • 1. My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is…
    Met a guy at work, fell in love, had a beloved child. Learned at 24.5 years that he’d been cheating (he told). THEN I began to do the Chump Archaeology, and learned that he’d been scouting a new life for nearly 5 years– just waiting for the right piece of meat to come along. It wasn’t that OW, but he tanked our marriage and ripped the family apart. (And no, he still doesn’t get it…). Almost done with the divorce.

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is…

    NYTimes Mag, coffee, Ta-Nehesi Coates at the Atlantic (seriously brilliant), and any other good reading; chores; dog care–I have Newfies (well, right now only 1)… homebody stuff like that.

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals?
    Seriously ? Don’t care, but since I’m from Bawstin, Go Sox.

    4. Favorite inspirational quote?
    “Ceci n’est pas une pipe.” or “Only connect, that was the whole of her sermon.” or “There’s life in the old dame yet”.

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…

    Being in the company of happy dogs. Big ones, with long fur.

    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want to go)
    Manhattan, d’oh!. Germany: Hamburg, Leipzig. England: York, London. Sweden: Lund, Stockholm. All other major cities and interesting University towns can apply.

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…

    I don’t wash it. Or, like, whatever.

    8. If you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?

    I am possibly the world’s worst gardener of any sort imaginable. (I can however cook.) I would have to resort to barter.

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?

    I have done, alas. I have far too many useless degrees. Since I’m not an academic (Thank FSM for that) I am sometimes unemployable, because my excess education confuses potential employers. But I’d like to be able to learn more languages–able to!

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?

    Mrs. Keckley (Mary Todd Lincoln’s dressmaker and a former slave)–to really learn about the middle of the 19th century–
    Jonathan Edwards & wife Sarah (Sinners in the Hands of an Angry God)–to really learn about life on the Frontier in 17th c. New England–
    Victoria Woodhull–because, right? Let’s mix it up a little folks.

    I would serve something, warm, that could sit, that was yummy, lots of roast pork & root veg, something from the sea perhaps, something fruit & custardy. Am I a yankee? why yes, yes, I am.

    • I wanna remove Ms. Woodhull and add Lou Reed. Damn but that’s upsetting. He was such a formative artist for me, since I was 15 and the Velvets, and that’s a l-o-n-g road…. Still, if you caught him in a good humor, he’d be a helluva dinner guest.

  • This is fun! I’d like to think this is not just for dating purposes but rather to get to know one another.

    Here goes nothing.
    1. My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is…
    Married a seemingly nice, attractive, good guy who ended up to be a serial cheater. Would not believe it for the longest time (married 26 years) until the final OW (third to my knowledge). Kicked him out immediately and been divorced for 6 months and still wondering why I didn’t do it sooner. Reinventing myself and loving it. Life is good.

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is…

    Church, shopping with friends and then snuggle up with a good book or movie with low-carb hot chocolate.

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals?

    Where I live, you better be a Red Sox fan or they’ll run you out of town.

    4. Favorite inspirational quote?

    I am enough.

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…

    Used to bike, ski and hike but now would just rather take long walks. Will try anything once as long as I don’t land in jail or hell.

    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want to go)

    London (visited several times), Italy (how could anyone not love this country?), Thailand (Thais are the most wonderful people in the world), Africa (bucket list – safari) and Australia (bucket list).

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…

    My wedding day. I had to redo my hair after the hairdresser took a few liberties. Bad omen of times to come. Hairdresser is probably now a famous fortune teller.

    8. If you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?

    Plants would rather die than be in my care. Wouldn’t know what to do with livestock. Love anything organic, though.

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?

    Interior design. First love but ended up in finance which I also enjoy.

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?

    Jesus, Buddha and Stephen Sondheim. Vegan entrees for the Buddha. I bet Jesus and Sondheim would love some grass-fed steak with sauteed mushrooms. Decadent chocolate cake with raspberry filling would complete the meal. I’ll have to ask what wine they want since I don’t drink (alas, have alcohol intolerance).

  • 1. My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is… He was a crappy husband. I tried very hard to make it work for the kids. Years of emotional neglect and complete disregard. He strayed. I’m free!

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is…Coffee in bed, hiking in nature, lunch with friends, reading, a long bath.

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals? Red Sox!

    4. Favorite inspirational quote? Be who you are.

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…yoga, swimming in the ocean

    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want to go) Paris, Isles of Shoals, Copenhagen, Florence, Vienna

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…I went platinum blonde (single process) when I was 17.

    8. If you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever? Raspberries, Loganberries, Gooseberries, Elderberries, Blackberries, Tomatoes, Basil, Beets, cucumbers, hot and sweet peppers, onions, green beans, cabbage, yellow squash, butternut squash, brussels sprouts, asparagus, horseradish, potatoes, fava beans, rosemary, peaches, apples, pears.
    I would keep bees. I would have a Guernsey or Jersey cow for milk. I would have a few dairy goats. I would have a few rare heirloom sheep that I would raise for wool.

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why? cultural anthropology… it interest me

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve? Mozart, Willa Cather, and Margaret Fuller. I would serve braised lamb shanks, rice, stewed veggies, red wine and cherry pie.

  • 1. My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is…

    Married 20 + years to college sweetheart. He became increasingly unhappy, started drinking and hanging in bars. He asked for a trial separation, but came home for a bit (I guess I won the pick me dance.). I found out he was cheating the whole time during MC, etc and I asked for a divorce.

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is…

    Sleeping in. Maybe going for a nice breakfast or making one at home. Going out for a walk, watching some football or reading. Making a nice dinner and watching a movie.

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals?

    Not a baseball fan but I like the NFL.

    4. Favorite inspirational quote?

    “When people show you who they are, believe them. The first time. ” Maya Angelou

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…

    Not much into sports but I like to run and I enjoy going for walks. I like to ski if the snow is good. I’m not a great skier but if the conditions are right, it’s a lot of fun.

    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want to go)

    I love to travel. I love Italy, NYC, Vancouver, Maui and just about anywhere near the ocean.

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…

    80’s hair was interesting to say the least. I might have had a mullet in the 70s and didn’t know it.

    8. If you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?

    I am not a gardener and I’d probably starve if it weren’t for farmers. I love fresh peas and carrots though so I’d try to grow those.

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?

    I would probably study medicine.

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?

    1. Jesus 2. Buddha 3. Shakespeare

    I’d probably serve a vegetarian dish and tenderloin. And a variety of cocktails.

  • deborahchump@aol.com

    1. My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is…
    Met him in February 2012, wasn’t attracted to him initially at all. Went on 2nd date, gave him a chance. Fell in love and in January of 2013 saw a tab and opened it on his laptop,Craigslist Casual Encounter ad. Left him, he admitted to one massage parlor happy ending and 2 meetings with the same person on Craigslist. Glad to have him out of my life and now he is someone else’s problem while I now start to live my life again!

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is…
    Watching CBS Good Morning. Reading the New York Times on Paper with Coffee. Taking my dog for a long walk and going bike riding followed by a movie and dinner.

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals?
    YANKEES! Bronx Kid originally.
    4. Favorite inspirational quote?
    Never, never, never give up -Winston Churchill
    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…
    Dancing and Swimming
    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want to go) Paris, London, Spain, Japan, Maine

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…
    I got a free assymetrical haircut in the mid 1980’s

    8. If you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?
    Artichokes, I like them and find them fascinating and fun to eat and the leaves as well as the hearts are all yummy.

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?
    Industrial Design. I love all types of design and think it would be so much fun to design something for everyday use.

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?
    Winston Chuchill, Charlie Chaplin, Maya Anjelou and I would serve, lamb chops with baked potatoes and broccoli rabe with champainge. Chocolate covered strawberries for dessert with creme fraiche.

  • 1. My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is…
    I believed being madly in love ‘meant something’ about the person I was in love with, and about the relationship. I though a person who said they saw the effects of violence and infidelity in their own families actually intended to avoid both in their own. I thought when a person said they loved you, that meant they had some concern for your happiness. I thought when you had a family together, it could be assumed that you’d both work hard to make the kids happy and make it possible to raise them together. I know better now!

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is…
    Lazing about reading, taking a walk, cooking and eating, watching a movie ….

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals?
    Help! Don’t even know what sport this refers to!

    4. Favorite inspirational quote?
    These days, ‘when somebody shows you who they are, believe them’.

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…
    Oooh, that’s a hard one! Love to hike, to skate, to swim (hate chlorine, though!), to dance …

    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want to go)
    Rio de Janeiro, Martinique, the mountains in British Columbia, been to those; still need to get to the Grand Canyon and Florence

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…
    I had long hair, went to the beach all day, then rode home in the open back of a pick-up truck. Or perhaps just after giving birth!

    8. If you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?
    I’d love to grow corn and raspberries, but in reality I would starve; major black thumb.

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?
    Sociology – I want to do a study on how couples work out their finances, it’s fascinating! Or maybe Architecture – just to better understand some of the beautiful buildings I see.

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?
    Jane Austin, Raoul Wallenburg, and Sarah Vaughn. Either cold cucumber and dill soup then curried lamb followed by coconut blanc manger, or my famous chili w/cornbread and then lime sorbet.

  • And I don’t know if any real-life contacts or dating will come of this, but MAN could we put on a good feast!!! Those who don’t like to cook can set the table, and do more than their share of the dishes.

  • redlesschump@gmail.com

    1. My chump story:
    20 years ago I met him that’s true
    He left me for another woman, boo hoo
    I have 2 amazing girls
    Neither of them have curls
    We’re getting a divorce, Fuck You!

    2. Spending Sunday:
    Donuts, coffee, and a couch

    3. Red Sox or Cards:
    Red Sox because of Shane Victorino–a local boy from Hawaii. I only watch it till football comes on!

    4. Quote:
    “If you’re going thru Hell, keep going”

    5. Aside from sex:
    Playing volleyball

    6. Travel locations:
    European castle ruins, California Redwoods, Santorini Greece, Rockefeller Center during Christmas time, Disney world.

    7. Worst hair:
    80’s bi-level–yikes!

    8. Organic farming:
    I would grow boysenberries and peaches.

    9. Back to school:
    I would study Astropysics. Sounds like fun

    10. Dinner and guests:
    I would invite Jesus, Hannibal Lecter, Plato. Sorry, no fava beans or chianti but I would have vegetarian pizza, chips and salsa, lemon cake, and vodka.

    • Awww, Redless! As soon as I saw ChumpLady’s post I thought, “Oh! I can write a limerick!”

      Ya beat me to it, but I’m gonna write it anyway! : )

    • redless,
      A-hem, if you will indulge me for a bit I would like to try and read between the lines of your true personality behind that flamboyant screen name “redless” mmmm… (bet you don’t have any freckles either). And if I am way off, please feel to tell no-one, I am really good at this and about to quit my day job – but just in case, keep this between us (my future customers lurk this site). Along with that, I also leave myself open for you to truly have a “good go” at improving your profile from these pearls.

      Chump story: Lets, see… You think you are a song writer from your young days hanging around the band – I am envisioning a groupie for a 80’s hair band like weird al yank – I can see you mesmerizing over his curls and wishing them upon your daughters.

      Spending Sunday: I am sorry, but you are a total sex maniac – I did not want to come right out and say it, but the truth cannot be hidden anymore this deep into my analysis. It was already clear to me by the response in your opening question with that explicative. It’s clear “F” is on you mind. And here again, “couch”… phu-lease – it does not take a rocket to figure that out – “couch” seriously? Get a room.

      Red Sox or Cards: You avoid the question and immediately make reference to Hawaii and surfer boys. Again, the sexual overtones are rather alarming. We all get the “surfer boys with no shirts saying far-out dude” visual thank you very much – could you be a little less obvious. And the grammatical semantics of “till football comes on” – seriously – “comes on” – could you not have said, “till football starts” – much less typing – but oh no… the happy ending reference is borderline shameful – english teachers everywhere are blushing.

      Quote: “keep going” – I could have a field day with this one… tut tut. “Keep going” need I say more. You’re still in therapy right? For the lonely boys sake on this site, please “keep going” there may be some unresolved issues, just sayin’

      Aside from sex: Oh my, for the life of me, the volleyball wise crack makes total sense now. You naughty girl. You do know that pole dancing pays more.

      6. Travel locations: This one is deep and I have to use some of seldom called for advanced psycho skills, but for you, I speaka ^H^H^H^H killa da bull. Your life is in “ruins”, but you dream of castles and the knights and men in tights that go along with them. You are obsessed with red – red-hair, redwoods, red-more, red-less – we all know what red symbolizes. Trying to meet rich Rockefeller types to get christmas gifts – Girl, if you wanna get laid, just say so. Most men on this site have one thing on the brain and don’t have the deep analytic skills to untangle your real needs.

      Boys and berries on your farm – it’s organic farming – not orgasmic farming – you are in the 69% if people that see something sexual in everything they read.

      Astropysics – We know you meant AstropHysics – but typos reveal the real you. “Sounds like fun” mmmm, could have said, Gee boys, I am blonde and this looks like “fun”, can I play (eyelash flutter). We all know astro is not fun, its boring and the text books are thick with big words – just ask Brittany: http://britneyspears.ac/lasers.htm

      Vodka? Subtlety is not your strong point girl – you may as well throw in some oysters.

      So there you have it. That would normally cost you a few benjamins – but I will consider this practice for my new voc. Do I have you pegged? (don’t answer that).

      😉

      Disclaimer for the disturbed – this is just an inside joke twixt me, Chump Man and redless – don’t be alarmed – I know, I know, my kids tell me all the time I am not as funny as I think I am. And CL please don’t block me from this site or my life would be back to “eat, sleep weep, repeat” and I can’t go back there.

      May you all find love again, preferably in meat-space instead of here in cyber-space.
      Peace.

      • Greg,
        Ba ha ha haha, you slay me. I love it! You have truly made my week. Thank you. I appreciate the fact that you did not bring about any sexual connotations as that would, of course, be strictly a psychological projection from you. 🙂 Thank you again for the fun. Until next time……
        And yes, thank you CL for not banning us. We play nice with others.

        • Hey redless – thanks for being a good sport. Glad you were tickled a bit by the silliness. A little light-heartedness helps me maintain my sanity. I know we are all on this tough pilgrimage together and it’s not one of those “enjoy the ride” journeys, so thanks for the encouragement and the momentary detour. Live strong.

          • Greg,
            It was great to forget about life for a while and just laugh my ass off. I came close to peeing myself till you went after the boysenberries. We don’t get them here on the island and they are one of my favorite foods in the world. That was a low blow my friend but I forgive you because the rest of it was freaking hilarious. I know you were just coming after me because of that Pamela Anderson comment. I know that you have her red swimsuit in your closet and that it still fits you. Nothing wrong with that, you enjoy yourself.

            I think I will piggyback on your new voc. I’ll read between the lines and you type it since I obviously am not an English major nor typist. Feel free expand on your profile (or not) since I already exposed the “true you.” BTW, I would have side-barred this but I did not see an email to reply to. It’s probably there and I am just blind, blonde, or both (perhaps none of them). Anyway, folks we are open for weddings and bat mitzvahs!

  • My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is…

    I once met a cheater named Steve,
    And oh how he LOVED to deceive.
    He said HE was chumped
    But ‘twas ME that he stumped
    So, *from* me, he’ll get NO reprieve!

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is…
    Browsing in a bookstore

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals?
    Red Sox…only because my cheating ex went to school in St. Louis

    4. Favorite inspirational quote?
    “Maturity is when you stop doing the things that you have to make excuses for,
    and stop making excuses for the things you have to do.” ~Marilyn Vos Savant

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…
    Walking…a LOT! Swimming, biking, kickboxing, lifting weights, jogging etc.

    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want to go)
    Germany, San Francisco, Japan, Austrailia and New York City

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…
    Now. Stress from being chumped has caused me to lose about 50% of it. Plus, I just dyed it a few days ago, and I absolutely HATE the color.

    8. If you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?
    Ha! I’d probably starve! I’ve killed cactus and bonsai trees…

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?
    Journalism. I love research, writing and reporting

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?
    Jesus Christ
    Benjamin Franklin
    Stephen Covey (May he R.I.P)

    I would serve Surf-n-Turf, steamed asparagus and a baked potato with all the ‘the works’. I wouldn’t serve a salad…unless I stole some veggies from Chump Lady’s organic garden…

  • Not looking to date. Still chumpily married. alex AT whitearrow DOT ca (not com)

    1. My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is…

    Married girl of my dreams. She turned mean. Assumed it was my fault. Then she fucked her boss. And gave him lots of money, too.

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is…

    Cuddling with sons first thing in the morning, followed by reading, listening to music, riding our bikes to a park and playing catch, then back home for more reading and music.

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals?

    Cardinals: was rooting for the Texas Rangers earlier.

    4. Favorite inspirational quote?

    I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us. (Romans 8:18) [note: don’t assume I’m a religious Christian — I just like the quote]

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…

    Cuddling with my sons.
    Fencing.

    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want to go)

    Italy, NYC, Iceland, Jerusalem, Scotland

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…

    I grew it long, ca. 1987. I also grew an awful awful beard.

    8. If you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?

    I would grow zucchini, because everything else I try dies.

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?

    Hebrew, because, as Bob Dylan so winningly said when asked why he was studying Hebrew “I don’t know how speak it.”

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?

    W.H. Auden
    Sojourner Truth
    The Baal Shem Tov

    Vegetarian chili and pecan pie

  • 1. My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is…
    Met. Loved. Drugs. Cheating. Found CL…

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is…
    I work but being outdoors with my camera. After reading the NYT and brunch.

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals?
    The Heat

    4. Favorite inspirational quote?
    Life is what happens when you’re making other plans.

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…
    Fishing, gardening.

    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want to go)
    Italy, Ireland, Australia, Alaska, London

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…
    Most of my life…FINALLY found a good hairdresser (at 53)

    8. If you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?
    I would love to do any and all of it…as much as I could get.

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?
    Art – because that’s what I want to do eventually full time.

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?
    Capt. Tony Tarracino, Muhammed Ali and Obama.
    I would serve yellowtail snapper that I had caught, jasmine rice, a salad and key lime pie made with key limes from my tree.

  • clarearise at aol.com

    1. My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is…

    Moved to the US to marry a hooker beating sociopath. That pretty much sums it up.

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is…

    Laziness… Sunday is a day of rest 🙂

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals?

    Whoever the person I am with is supporting.

    4. Favorite inspirational quote?

    “That which does not kill us makes us stronger” ~Nietzsche

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…

    More sex

    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want to go)

    I loved Turkey – would go back in a heartbeat. Also enjoyed Italy and Prague. Been to most of the European countries as well as several in Africa, Israel etc. Australia and NZ are on my bucket list.

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…

    I got fed up of my blond highlights and wanted to go back to Auburn. The dye made the highlighted bits orange 🙁

    8. If you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?

    Lots of different fruit and veg – and garlic. Can you grow pizza? 🙂 I’d also love livestock and a whole host of pets.

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?

    I’d get my Psychology PhD- I find it endlessly fascinating and newer thought leaders and studies are constantly unearthing new information and doctrines. And interior design.

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?

    Adam Levine, Richard Gere, Channing Tatum. I would serve them me. Naked. 🙂

  • 1. My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is…
    Met cheating wife at a local festival 20 + yrs ago. Dated for 3 yrs. Married 20 yrs built a house/home and a family with three great kids. I get the “I love you but not in love with you speech” I find texts, emails, large phone bills. She confesses to the affair with HS boyfriend, I’m crushed and spend nearly a year of hell. Divorce coming in Feb.

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is…
    All depends on the season. Summer: Hanging out with family/friends by the lake. Fall: Hanging out with family watching the Packers or outdoors up at the cabin with friends/family. Winter: skiing, snowmobiling with family/friends. Spring: To messy and sloppy outside. Time to go somewhere warm.

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals?
    Don’t watch Major League baseball close enough to care. But I will root for the team my kids are playing on.

    4. Favorite inspirational quote?
    I know these are cheesy but I’ve always liked “Get busy livin’ or get busy dyin”, and “If nothing changes nothing will change”.

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…
    My favorite form of exercise would be keeping busy outside. Although I will on occasion go on a walk early in the morning just to wake up.

    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want to go)
    No strong desire to travel abroad. (yet) So many places in the states that I would like to see first. I still consider Disney a blast and would go again, I Would also love to visit Yellowstone again. Want to see Alaska, Maine and some sort of tropical place with White sand.

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…
    Probably in high school. My hair was curly so I wore a stocking cap quite often to keep the curls down.

    8. If you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?
    Ummmm IDK??

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?
    Always had a knack with computers and desire for music with some business studies thrown in.

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?
    No historic figure come to mind. I would like to spend time with my grandparents who have past. One grandfather died before I was born, so I never met him, The others died when I was younger (teens & twenties). I would love to have some adult conversations with them.
    What to serve. Nothing fancy, most likely comfort food. Probably Meatloaf or Pork Chops, Mashed potatoes and sweet corn with a loaf of fresh baked bread w/butter and a cold glass of whole milk……. Dessert would be some of my Grandmother’s poppyseed coffee cake and a cup of percolated coffee. (No drip brewed coffee would be good enough for Gramma’s coffee cake)

  • 1. Taken in by sparkles. I gave, he took, but it was never enough and he found more elsewhere. I danced ‘til I could dance no more, then he terrorized me for not dancing well enough. Planning the sucker punch.
    2. Sunday starts with a workout, then omelets, and hanging out with the kids, preferably outside.
    3. Spectator sports not really my thing, though I don’t mind watching football.
    4. “It is what it is.”
    5. Horseback riding, mountain biking, snorkeling
    6. Love Ireland, Costa Rica, San Fransisco; want to go to New Zealand, Africa; hoping to take the kids to Hawaii.
    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when… oh, yesterday probably. Wild curls are always wild curls, except when the wind blows.
    8. Organic farming would be fun! I’d love to have horses, cows, chickens, ducks, and I’d grow veggies and fruits and herbs, and lots of flowers.
    9. I have degrees in the sciences, so no more professional education for me. I would like to take classes in arts, particularly welding for sculptures, and hot glass.
    10. Oh dear, so much pressure. I’d like to say Jesus, Gandhi, and the Dali Lama, but I would be so nervous I’d probably throw up. Let’s say John Young, Wernher von Braun, Story Musgrave, and Charlie Bolden. I know that’s four, but I can’t leave Charlie out. I’d serve salmon, colcannon, asparagus, and rum cake.

  • 1. My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is…
    Met in highschool and dated for 7 years. About 15 girls later, constantly being told Im doing something wrong and an engagement, he calles the wedding off (never even called my parents to apologize for the 20k+ that was already spent that wasnt going to be returned). Still tried to work it out. Found another woman again and moved in with her, basically, after knowing her for 2 weeks. Tried to come back and found out she was pregnant.

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is…
    Sleeping in (or as long as my dogs will let me), making a big breakfast, and just spening time cleaning, outside or with my family

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals?
    No clue

    4. Favorite inspirational quote?
    “As within, so without”. (principle of Hermeticism)

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…
    Dancing!

    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want to go)
    Mexico, Keys, Italy, New Zealand, Alaska

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…
    Umm every time I wake up without doing something to the night before lol

    8. If you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?
    I could attempt to do veggies and fruits, not too sure how it would work out though! I know I can grow pineapples and herbs but maybe I would try for cucumbers and tomatoes. Oh and definitely livestock. Not sure what I would do without meat!

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?
    I would like to change my minor to a master in psych. I loved the classes and find it very interesting.

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?
    Jesus
    Gandhi
    Elizabeth Blackwell
    I would probably serve mojo pork tenderloin with a mojo white wine sauce, pasta with a lemon caper sauce, and broiled broccoli in olive oil. Dessert would probably be either my oreo cookie cake or my Nona’s italian Gobbs 🙂

  • Not divorced yet, so no chumpy matchups for me!

    kb@nomorecheating.com

    1. My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is… –Married 16 years to a man who hated his father for cheating on his mother. Flipped his cell phone over a year ago to discover that lo! he was cheating on me!. Discovered Chump Lady. The exit plan is nearly at execution stage.

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is…–A lazy day of a post-church brunch, training the dogs, hiking in the autumn woods, and finishing off with some computer gaming on my new rig (built by moi).

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals?–Cardinals.

    4. Favorite inspirational quote?–I have several, and not all qualify as “inspirational.” Currently I’m drawing inspiration from the admonition to view life’s incidents sub specie aeternitatis, from the gaze of eternity.

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…–This changes. Currently it’s walking, but I can muster much passion for weight training and biking. I’ve enjoyed running, but would have to cough up a lung for about 3 weeks before getting in good enough shape to where running feels good again.

    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want to go)–Oxford (UK), Australia (okay, it’s a big place so I’d need a lot of time), Sweden (another big place), Northern California, Vancouver.

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…–I was fourteen and went to a basketball game in the freezing cold after my mom had cut my bangs with pinking shears (no, I didn’t have notches, but I was mortified). My hair was still damp and my bangs stuck out and froze.

    8. If you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?–Roses and herbs. I’d also have apple trees. Recently I have thought about chickens.

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?–Math, because I skipped out on a lot of it the first time around, but took a class a couple of years ago and thought it was fun.

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?–Gosh, this is hard!!! Hildegard of Bingen, George Mason, and Franklin Roosevelt. I’d do barbecued ribs, whatever sides come to mind, and local brewpub beer. For dessert, I’d make a Shaker lemon pie.

  • Ha! This is super fun! Okay, here goes… I have not dated since my divorce, but am open to whatever the future brings. My contact is chumpdiva @ gmail . com (just take the spaces out).

    1. Snappy sentences: I met my douchy, alcoholic, cheater ex-husband in high school when he was far less douchy, cheatery or alcoholicy. We were together for 17 years and had one adorable kiddo. I had two 2 D-Days, 10 years apart, although there have since discovered there have been at least 11 OW’s. The 2nd D-Day happened when I was with him at the hospital for alcohol induced pancreatitus in 2012. I am now very happily divorced (YAY) and my ex-husband is about to sever time for his continued douchy alcoholic-ness (3 dui’s will do that to ya!)

    2. Sunday for me includes – Always pancakes in the morning (and coffee). Some snuggle/lazy time with my kiddo. Then a day of family stuff, errands and perhaps a dog walk (coonhound & labradoodle) and finally dinner and more snuggle time with the girlie.

    3. Who has time for baseball right now, it’s college football season!!! (Go Huskies)

    4. My favorite inspirational quote is a Maori saying… Turn your face to the sun and shadows fall behind you.

    5. Aside from sex my favorite physical activity is hiking. I live in the BEAUTIFUL Pacific Northwest, so there are trails abound. However, I am somewhat of a princess hiker, no rainy hiking!

    6. My favorite places to travel are Australia (lived there for 6 months when I was a teenager), Phoenix (to get away from the PNW rain/grey), Southern California (waves and sunshine), Hawaii (who doesn’t love spam?), and New York City (too much to see).

    7. Definitely junior high… It was the 90’s and I had the whole “Bang Fan” going on… for real!!!!!

    8. If I was an organic farmer I would grow strawberries. Lots and lots of strawberries. I used to be allergic to strawberries, but after I had my kiddo, I can eat them (weird, right?). And I have a lot of catching up to do. Plus organic strawberries taste AMAZING.

    9. If I went back to school (no thank you, btw) I’d either go for a Masters in Public Administration (I am a lowly public servant). Or maybe law school because, I really like putting bad guys in jail, and it would be awesome to get paid more to do it.

    10. Oh man THIS question… If I could invite 3 historic figures to dinner I would invite: Jill Scott, Audrey Hepburn, and Queen Elizabeth I. I’m pretty sure I’d have that shit catered, cuz nothing I can cook would live up to that crowd. But I would provide some killer wine!!!

      • Thanks DG… We have some great hiking around here, but I’m sure you do too. Princess Hiking also means that I don’t go anywhere or do anything that would involve me having to bring a bear canister. Lol…

        • Lol. I don’t like to call it hiking so much as meandering in nature. Hiking involves a lot of steep up and downs. I like to enjoy nature, not stare at my feet while panting and trying not to die while I make it up a hill. Princess Hiking…hehe, that’s perfect.

        • The only time Ive run into a bear I was about half a mile from the townsite at Waterton AB. Had my young sons with me. Frightening!

  • 1. My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is…
    Fell in love with someone who never fell in love with me back. Spent 18 years with him. Produced a beautiful child who orbits near the very center of my universe and most definitely loves me back. Selfish asshole husband decided he preferred a long-distance romance with a childhood friend over marriage to me. I smoked his ass in divorce and have begun earnestly living my happily ever after!

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is…
    Have a lazy morning with my daughter, lounging around in pajamas, taking a long time to eat breakfast while we spend time on the computer or watch television or read books.

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals?
    I don’t watch hockey, sorry.

    4. Favorite inspirational quote?
    “The nicest thing about not planning is that failure comes as a complete surprise and is not preceded by a period of anxiety.” John Preston, 1809-1891

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…
    Strolling in leafy woods during Autumn.

    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want to go)
    London. I hope to travel to Ireland, Scotland, Italy and Spain.

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…
    My mother cut my bangs in the second grade.

    8. If you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?
    I have no gardening ability but I love food so much that I would figure it out. I would raise chickens because it seems a little easier: strew seeds on ground daily and provide water. Would need someone else to do the horrible deed to bring a chicken meal to the table, though.

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?
    I would study Latin because as a dead language it is no longer spoken while remaining relevant. Love me some Latin!

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve? William Shakespeare (because I want to know who he really is), Elizabeth I, Billy Connolly (so that conversation never dries up – LOL). Would have it catered: burger, fries, milkshakes, Coca-Cola, chocolate chip cookies.

    Sorry, don’t have an email address to post here.

  • 1. My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is…
    Met, fell in love. He drank & cheated, I blamed me. Married him & spackled. He drank & cheated, I stopped blaming me. I kicked him out.

    2. My favorite way to spend Sunday..
    A leisurely breakfast with the newspapers, a walk to the pub for lunch and a few drinks with friends, tea and cake in front of a film in the afternoon, a soak in the bath then a couple of glasses of wine and a good tv drama in the evening.

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals?
    No idea, I’m British

    4. Favorite inspirational quote?
    It seems to be popular one here but the one that has made the most sense to me recently is ‘When people show you who they are, believe them’ although I find myself muttering ‘Nothing but a pack of cards’ from Alice in Wonderland when I think about my marriage. Or ‘Trust that they suck’ everytime I think of my STBXH.
    ‘It is what it is until it isn’t’ is another favourite but I can’t remember where that came from, apologies if I’ve stolen that from someone here.

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…
    Walking. Or dancing badly after a few drinks.

    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want to go)
    Want to – Barcelona, Arctic (to see the Northern Lights)
    Favourite – York, Scotland & Peak District

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…
    I was 17 and had a perm. The hairdresser left the perming solution on too long and I looked like Annie.

    8. If you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?
    In my head I would grow a huge variety of vegetables and fruit and keep chickens, goats, alpacas, pigs and ducks. In reality all the animals would become pets and eat all the fruit and vegetables. I would be destitute and hungry. Therefore I propose a Chump Farming Co-Operative. I volunteer to cook, clean & look after the animals.

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?
    Art. I have a talent for drawing and would like the time and opportunity to develop it. I would also like to take a creative writing course. I would also like to train as a vetinary nurse. I may very well do any of these in the future.

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?
    Elizabeth 1 as I admire her determination in a very male dominated world and that she really had to outsmart those around her, Nancy Mitford for the stories she would tell and the style with which she would tell them and Vincent Van Gogh who I would ply with alcohol until he agreed to paint a portrait of my cats. I’d serve a roast beef dinner followed by chocolate cake then cheese and biscuits with lots of wine.

  • 13mockingbirdlane13@gmail.com

    1. My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is…

    Thought I married a good person,
    But it was an hallucination I was nursin’.
    He cheated at the start and then later again.
    Know now that he sucks,
    Only wish I knew then.

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is…

    Waking up and taking my cute pup for a long walk, getting a nice cappuccino, and then watching the CBS Sunday Morning show.

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals…

    Sox…they could use the joy after what happened earlier this year.

    4. Favorite inspirational quote…

    It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again; because there is not effort without error and shortcomings; but who does actually strive to do the deed; who knows the great enthusiasm, the great devotion, who spends himself in a worthy cause, who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement and who at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly. So that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat. – Teddy Roosevelt

    And:

    She stole that tie! It’s the prefect crime; girls don’t wear ties! Although some do; it’s not a perfect crime, but it’s a good crime. – From the movie, “Arthur”

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…

    Walking with my pup

    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…(places you’ve been to or places you want to go)

    Paris; Nantucket; NYC (it’s where I live, but I’m catching up after being away for years and still love to be here and explore); Greece and Vietnam (never been, want to go);

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…

    In grade school when, for some reason, I thought a ponytail on the side of my head looked good.

    8. If you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?

    I’d try strawberries, watermelon, and arugula.

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?

    Something having to do with computers ’cause I think it would be cool to work for Apple or Google

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?

    Katherine Graham
    Harper Lee
    George Eliot

    A cup of butternut squash soup to start; an arugula salad with shaved parmesan and lemon and olive oil dressing; and, grilled chicken kabobs with basmati rice pilaf. For dessert – blood orange sorbet.

  • Ohh – I am so ready for dating again – let’s see if I can impress the ladies…
    charming_handsome_dude @ the_internet.com

    1. Chump story…
    My godess. WTF! Pick Me Dance. Kibbles. Weeping. Hasta la pasta biatch.

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is…
    Rubber ducking. (Thats right ladies, I am not afraid to share my feelings).

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals…
    I am also not really a hockey fan. Sorry. But to appease the personality test overlords, I’ll at least admit that I liked watching all the olympic sports, women’s volleyball in particular.

    4. Favorite inspirational quote…
    “You gonna eat that?”

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…
    Lifting and Pressing – i.e. Lifting the glass from the table to my lips and pressing the buttons on MY remote.

    6. Favorite places to travel…
    Bathroom, Kitchen and Walmart for that 3rd world experience.

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…
    Something like this:
    http://www.waterfall2006.com/images/cockburn.jpg

    8. If you had to be an organic farmer..
    A bacon field – no question.

    9. If you could go back to school
    Ha ha ha – love your sense of humor CL – “go back to school” – you crack me up!
    If this is a serious question, then probably rocket surgery.

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?
    Superman, Batman and Pamela Anderson. Bacon bits on top of bacon strips.

    I know you never asked, but for some bonus points, I also like fine dining, long walks on the beach and poking dead things with a stick – just so you know 😉

    • If i were a chick (which I ain’t) or gay (which I ain’t, but there’s nothing wrong with that) I would totally do you. I mean you know go out with you and then do you.

      So I wrote my online dating profile in a bluntly honest, poke-fun at myself manner, and man that shit was funny. I mean piss your pants greatness. And how many chicks dug my swag? Like 4. Here’s some highlights:

      Books or what have you been reading section:
      “Let’s see, well, what I have been reading lately is about 1,000 lady profiles that list 99 Shades of Grey right about here”.

      Animals? :
      “I love a puppy just as much as anyone else, but sorry I’m not going to get one just so I can meet you at the park at get laid”.

      (footnote: I have since reversed direction on the dog aspect of life, and got one under the pretense of getting it for my daughter’s birthday)

      Anyway – gave up on online dating. I’m convinced that you have to write the profile in some shmucky, fake, drivel way that’s just not me.

      • Hey Chump Man – thanks for the comments – please don’t put me on your “to DO” list 😉
        I am strictly after the ladies – if things don’t work out – I don’t think I could never bat for the other team, but I could cheer for them, since as you (and seignfeld) say “there’s nothing wrong with that” 🙂
        I am definitely stealing your puppy line – classic!
        Peace,
        Greg

    • Wow Gentlemen. I can’t believe you two haven’t been laid yet with amazing profiles like that. haha.

      Now just have some fun with this–I have a wicked sense of humor as well :). If you will indulge me for a bit I would like to try and read between the lines of your written humor and the true personality behind it. And if I am way off, please feel free to tell me I am terrible at this and to not quit my day job. Along with that, I also leave myself open for you to truly have a “good go” at my profile as well.

      I’m getting…….The website you give “charming…com” is a poke at a somewhat handsome man with a slight bit of insecurity (we all have it, we are chumps). He mentions showing his feelings via a rubber ducky comment but it also, covertly, comes out in the choice of words “pick me dance”. The pretending not to know about sports hides a true sports fan who is trying to appease the ladies by saying “I will be available during Sunday football hours for your shopping pleasure.” (Sidebar: excellent choice on the volleyball call).

      “Glass to lips” is vague–great choice of words, however, the “MY” remote–I would lowercase that. This would show you are more open to sharing the remote which may include chick flicks. Bathroom, kitchen, and Walmart describes a true handyman and could be a fixer of all things including a broken heart!

      Finally, Superman and Batman both are real men and loved by all which shows you have a good heart. And Pamela Anderson, comfortably in touch with your feminine side–in a good way. I do hear a twinge of subtle disdain about your ex in the comment about poking dead things with a stick, but that is very healthy. (Most of us want to poke our ex-nightmares with a cattle prod hooked up to a power-pole outside).

      Thank you for indulging me. I truly meant this with a good heart and little fun. I hope all goes well with you. All in all a good man who will one day find his true Goddess! Good luck.

      • Hey redless – OMG – You are a sidechick – you 6th sense is totally on and you have me pegged. I totally suck at mind-reading. I definitely need to disguise some of those phrases for all ye “between the line” readers – heaven forbid someone see the real me – eek!!
        Oh – believe me – I am sooooo going to have a “good go” at your profile – he he he… 😉
        Happy Day.

  • Girl meets boy, falls in love and gets married.
    Two beautiful children, wonderful job, life is good.
    Travel, adventure, amazing friends and family.
    Boy cheats on girl and boy walks out on husband and father responsibilities.
    Girl heartbroken.

    Favorite Sunday activity: breakfast in bed with my boys, eating sugar cereal and watching cartoons.

    Red Sox or Cardinals: there is only one team, and that’s the Phillies.

    Quote: “Life is uncertain, eat dessert first”.

    Favorite activity: Having a baseball catch

    Favorite places to travel: Pacific Northwest, New England, Adirondack Mountains

    My worst hair: Junior year old college. I thought cutting it short would be a good idea when I studied abroad. Ya, not my best decision.

    Organic farmer: onions, tomatoes and garlic, so I could make amazing pasta sauces.

    Going back to school: I’d study film with the goal of being a film critic. “You want to pay me to watch movies and then tell you want I think of them… Where do I sign up”.

    Three people from history to eat with: Leonardo DiVinci, Paul Newman and Mike Schmidt.

    Who cares about the food cause I’m spending my time playing catch with Michael Jack Schmidt, talking Cool Hand Luke with Newman and asking DiVinci to build my kids an awesome flying contraption in my back yard.

  • I wonder who’s going to go back to this post and scroll through 174 comments to read what I write? No matter, it’ll be a hoot.

    1. My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is… During a twelve year marriage to a woman who I was convinced was nearly perfect and who gave us a wonderful son in 2003, life happened. I sensed her boredom and dissatisfaction and tried to change – to be what I thought she would want me to be, but it was too late. She wanted out, and had an exit affair to make sure of it. After a minimum of chumpidity, I secured a divorce that protected me and my son. I am now me again, happy in my home, my jobs, my fatherhood and my life – but a touch lonely. However, a wise chump once said, “lonely is better than miserable…” – how true.

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is… A toss-up. Roll out early and play an old-time or bluegrass gospel gig somewhere, or sleep in until 0800, drive to church and pour a big coffee, (I’m not a member, I just volunteer and they brew great java), and drive a group of seniors in the church bus from their co-op to second service. Take them home and chuckle at the things they said while heading to the ex’s place to pick up my son, then blow back to our drama-free home and enjoy his sweet company as we pursue our varied relaxation.

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals? Oh, I really don’t care much for mainstream sports. But it would be nice to be with someone who liked to watch the Winter Games. If the Sox and Cards only played once every four years it might be more interesting?

    4. Favorite inspirational quote? “Every one is worthy of love, except him who thinks that he is. Love is a sacrament that should be taken kneeling.” ~Oscar Wilde

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is… Non-fossil fuel dependent movement. Skis, bikes, running, hiking, canoeing/kayaking, You get the picture…

    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. Well, I’d view with trepidation – travel in some parts of the far or middle east. Traveling to places where you are not welcome is like purposely hanging out with narcissists. But in general I’d say it matters less where you go, and more how hard you work to get off the beaten track and meet real natives once you’re there. Did anyone ever go to Europe and use Rick Steves’ “Europe Through the Back Door” as a guide? I did. It was a defining experience in my life.

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when… The day after I cut it in 1980. I had been growing it for 3 years. It was simple, long and silky with highlights across both temples. I wore it in a ponytail. Something happened that summer between junior and senior year. I had to find a second job and make some more money. The only place hiring was a liquor store where the guy made me get a haircut so I could better stock his shelves and coolers. I still dream of that hair sometimes at night. Now I live on a planet called MPB. I just shave my head… What’s the point? Meh.

    8. If you had to be an organic farmer… Whatever I grew would have to be able to tolerate a short growing season as I love northern climates. Animals would need to be hardy too. But I would take as much of my sustenance from the woods and waters as I could as well. Not a true subsistence lifestyle, but a reasonable mix of small town and quiet country life near, say, Lake Superior.

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything… I applied for a grad school program last spring. Unfortunately they discontinued the program and neglected to tell me! But I’m still going to go back and study some aspect of elementary special ed. Maybe parlay my 35 year career as a musician into some kind of music therapy work. Working with kids is what I pursued after my divorce and after I lost my long time straight job in 2011. It’s the most rewarding thing I have ever done.

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve? Tiberius Claudius Drusus Nero Germanicus Brittanicus as he appears in “I, Claudius” and “Claudius the God” By Robert Graves. King Arthur as he appears in “The Once and Future King” by T.H. White. And Paul Wellstone. The menu would have to start with a Babelfish for each of us, but after that I’d serve my organic garden veggies – steamed, fresh caught walleye fried in butter and onions and maybe some pepperbacon wrapped ruffed grouse, and north shore blueberry muffins or blueberry cobbler. But the best part would be a fire crackling in the stove, a bottomless pot of tea, comfy chairs and political talk! It would be amazing if their wives could come too… Imagine talking to Agrippina, a veritable personification of pure evil, or discussing fidelity issues with Queen Guinevere? And of course, Sheila Wellstone was a well known and super intelligent advocate for human rights, mental health issues, the environment and peace. What a mix!

    pickinupsteam@gmail.com

  • 1. Married young. Loved and struggled. Had kids. Freak out middle aged melt down. Discovered affair, divorced.

    2. Sleeping late after a great night of dancing, going to church, singing in the choir, taking a nap, watching a movie, cuddling on the couch.

    3. Baseball puts me to sleep. Soccer and basketball are more fun to watch.

    4. “What batters you becomes your strength.” – Maria Rilke

    5. Walking my dog in a nearby park and laughing while she’s squirrel spotting.

    6. My favorite place to visit was Ireland, but I also enjoyed Alaska, Hawaii, and New York City. I’d love to see Scotland some day.

    7. The worst my hair ever looked was when my mom trimmed my bangs too short in kindergarten. My friends laughed and pointed at me when I went to school the next day.

    8. I would grow organic blackberries and sell them to local restaurants to make blackberry cobblers in the summer.

    9. I would study art history and display design so I could create interactive exhibits in museums. I’ve always loved museums. It would be great to be surrounded by beautiful art all day.

    10. Abraham Lincoln, Mark Twain, and Kurt Vonnegut because they were all brilliant, funny and eccentric. I’d serve chicken fricassee, mashed potatoes, cornbread, iced tea and angel food cake with strawberries for dessert.

    dawnwillfollow@gmail.com

  • Somehow, I inadvertently unsubscribed myself from this site. Catching up slowly with some of the posts. Well, just for fun, months later, here goes!
    1.My Chump story:
    Peter, Peter, Pu**y and C*ck eater
    Had a wife, but he was a serial cheater.
    His wife found out, only a few truths came to light
    She was stunned, oh there was such a fight!
    She knew the life as she knew it had to end
    No more meltdowns, her heart is on the mend.
    She found CL and chump friends
    Now she knows she was not going round the bend(s)
    Dumped the cheater, she was in so much pain
    Moving forward, a new life she is trying to gain.

    2. Favourite Sunday activity:
    Coffee, reading Saturday’s Globe and Mail because then I have time, a walk or bike ride, cuddling on my couch with my kitty watching a good movie or reading a good book.

    3. Sport.
    I have been Canadianized, so watch hockey. I love hating the Canucks, or is it that I hate loving the Canucks?
    It’s Super Bowl time, so it’s the Seahawks for me!

    4. Favourite quote.
    My High School principal impressed this upon me: Success begets success.

    5. Favourite activity besides sex:
    Cycling (fair weather cyclist), walking. Used to love running. Old injury still mending.

    6. Favourite places to visit.
    Scotland (especially Edinburgh), South Africa, Greece, Portugal.
    New Zealand and Australia are on my bucket list.

    7. Worst my hair has ever looked:
    I have fine hair, but quite a lot of it. When I don’t condition my hair, it tangles and
    my kids laugh when I try run a comb through.

    8. Organic farming:
    Too much like hard work! I support my local Farmer’s Market every week-end.

    9. Going back to school:
    Easy!! I would retake subjects so that I could be a Helicopter Pilot.

    10. Who would I invite to dinner and what would we eat.
    I would invite a) Bill Watterson, creator of Calvin and Hobbes – I love his comic strip!
    b) John Lennon and
    c) Chris Hadfield, Canadian Commander of the International Space Station.
    That means we could discuss our wonderful planet – from the eyes of a child – Calvin and his wonderful tiger, Hobbes, from John Lennon’s Peace on Earth point of view and Chris Hadfield’s current thoughtful insights.
    Dinner would be a South African Braaivleis (Barbeque). We would sit outside under the stars, cooking Venison in a 3-legged cast iron pot on the fire accompanied by bread made with beer, roasted potatoes and other vegetables wrapped in foil. And then there’s dessert – Bananas topped with chocolate and a splash of brandy, wrapped in foil and placed on the fire to heat up for a short while. We’d sip a good red wine and finish with an excellent port.

    Several months late, but that’s my contribution.

  • 1. My chump story in 5 snappy sentences is…
    30 years together, 28 married. She left as if none of it ever happened and I never existed. I look back and now see the massive red flags but never wanted to acknowledge them. It was always all about her and nothing else mattered. First words were “I love you but am not in love with you”. Enough said.

    2. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is…
    In bed (possibly actively in bed), at a museum, adventuring, or relaxing.

    3. Red Sox or St. Louis Cardinals?
    Cards. Why? Because I’m an original Rams fan and they are now in St. Louis. Also, the Red Sox had Pete Rose.

    4. Favorite inspirational quote?
    Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up,
    totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming ‘WOW, what a RIDE!!!

    5. Aside from sex, my favorite physical activity is…
    Well, for 30 years we didn’t really have much sex. I wouldn’t know what it is. I would love to really find out over the rest of my life. But I would love to get back into Paragliding and skiing.

    6. My top 5 favorite places to travel are…. (places you’ve been to, or places you want to go)
    Paris, London, Munich, Beijing, and Rio.

    7. The worst my hair has ever looked was when…
    A bad barber shaved me almost bald.

    8. If  you had to be an organic farmer (imagine a despotic utopia where Michael Pollan is king) what would you grow and why? Or are you more of a livestock person? Or would you starve, having absolutely no gardening ability whatsoever?
    Livestock, (meat) of course. My nickname is “meat” and I like it. (Last Name is Mitrev, pronounced meat rev).

    9. If you could go back to school to study anything (other than organic farming), what would it be and why?
    Wind turbine generator maintenance. Great source of energy and beautiful devices.

    10. If you could invite three historic figures to dinner, who would you invite and what would you serve?
    Lincoln, Sherman, and Columbus. Meat of course. Many kinds.

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