Today I’m running a guest post, submitted by an old, former chump friend Jayne Bennet from New England.
For those of you who have missed it, Aaron Hernandez, a former star tight end for the New England Patriots is on trial for the execution-style murder of Odin Lloyd, a former friend. Shayanna Jenkins is his fiancée and they have a child together.
Shayanna testified in court “I made a decision that if I was going to move back in with Aaron, I would need to compromise with his behavior, including his infidelity.” Reports indicate that after Aaron proposed in 2012 (after their child was born) that she continued to tolerate his roving eye.
Hernandez kept an apartment approximately 25-30 minutes away from the home he shared with Shayanna, and as court testimony revealed, he frequently went clubbing and socializing (read: on the prowl) without her. She willingly tolerated this and asked no questions when he spent the night away from home or decided to go out without her.
More importantly, there is speculation that Shayanna rid their home of critical evidence at Hernandez’s instruction. Should this prove to be true, not only does she sacrifice her self-worth at the Altar of Aaron Hernandez, she seriously (possibly permanently) compromises her character. This will follow her for the rest of her life . . . in job interviews, in standing on the sidelines at soccer games . . . there won’t be anyone who isn’t wondering if she really did it.
Shayanna, honey, no gravy train is THAT good. Compromising is deciding that you will go to an Italian restaurant because he likes Italian, NOT that you willingly subject yourself to humiliation just to stay in this one-sided relationship. What you sacrificed in your self-worth cannot be made up with a nice car and a mega-mansion on the outskirts of Boston. Would you want your daughter to follow this path—turning a blind eye to deliberately hurtful and demeaning behavior in order to drive a Lexus or not have to worry if there is enough money this month to treat yourself to a pedicure?
The “price of admission” in this relationship is too high. And really, the payoff isn’t likely to come. After the lawyers are done with Hernandez’s assets (even if he is acquitted), there won’t be much left. There’s not much left of your self-worth, either. And even if it does play out that Hernandez can return to the NFL and the sort of lifestyle he seems to enjoy living, what’s to say he wouldn’t throw you over for a new model in a few years?
This “relationship” has been all about him and all about you hanging on to something that isn’t much of anything. He gets to live like a single man and you . . . what are you getting out of this?
Is it worth it, Shayanna?
I don’t think so.