Stupid Shit Affair Partners Say?
At Chump Nation, we’ve spent years lovingly curating “Stupid Shit Cheaters Say.” Classics like, “I wasn’t buying strippers, I was buying self-esteem…. You spend money on stuff you don’t need!”
or “I wasn’t betraying you. I was betraying the thought that I might betray you.”
So today’s (fun?) Friday Challenge is to share the stuff their co-conspirator in Stupid says — the affair partner.
Some chumps have had the misfortune of having direct communication with the Schmoopies. Even more had the nauseating experience of reading the soul mate texts and emails. And some of us have even walked in on the bozos.
So, now’s your chance — lay it on me. What’s the dumbest thing they said?
TGIF!
Do you feel sorry for me, no I don’t
Will you help me, no f… Off!
I will be your kids aunty, shit sandwich!
Can we share him, no have him!
Incidentally yesterday ex, said I was jealous of his girlfriends! Course I am I want sti’s!
“we were a mess!” Really? And your solution was to fuck someone else for 5 yrs? Good plan.
…..like that had NOTHING to with WHY things were a mess?
Sweet smoking Jesus.
They are not interested in the mess! Mess? Have no needs and keep on giving, then there is no mess.
That is just a cover (I was upset at the mess) to get Strange.
It took me years and years and years to get this. One object called wife – newer, shinier object.
Even now: that 20 years, ceremony before God, community and state, our very real love, all our challenges and triumphs and beautiful children really do mean nothing (because, newer, younger, shinier object #4) …
still does boggle my mind even though I get it intellectually. [ Sometimes ]
What could she possible want your help for? I would lose my mind.
She tells terrible lies, has been proven, but still hangs around, ex was chucked out 5 years ago, always wants someone to save her, she picked my ex, over her kids unfortunately he picked her over our kids, she quite a tragic figure. She should be arrested soon, she thinks her life is shit now
Lol @ can we share him? No have him!
I always heard that the best revenge is to let the other person have them. Truth.
Mandie that’s a mental tattoo! THANK YOU!!
She asked me if I was “tattling” on him. When I let her know some s**t. I was having a good morning but when I got around to texting the b**** back I said “No” if I was “tattling” on him, Id tell you XYZ. That shut her off… fast and they fought for weeks. He told me. Go figure. It’s just another attempt to create flying monkeys. Walk on chumps! I never reached out to the OW. I guess she just thought I was going to give a s*** when she tried to triangulate me. I was stupid for a while but no contact now.
Word.
OW posted in facebook. “I’ve got his 6.” (STBX is a Law enforcement officer and OW is a new dispatcher in their department.) …. not really sure who she thinks he needs protection from….
Holy crap! My EX cheated with an officer, and is the new girl in the dispatch office!
He said “I got the perfect girl now” By perfect do you mean the girl that has cheated on her last 3…every time she starts a new job…yes, perfect/
Law enforcement officers….
So my ex (law enforcement officer) cheated with a bimbo 11 years younger. After his demotion to basically a rookie cop, he was put back on a beat with rotating shifts. His 1st night back on night shift after 12 years on straight days, his bitch posted on FB “thank you God for the night shift workers that keep us safe at night.” I wanted someone to respond “you dumb bitch, he was working night shift when you were still in high school!”
Maybe she was referring to inches? 😀
inches? Then 6 would be too high…
just sayin’
Now that’s funny as heck!
For the win!
I’m sure she thinks he needs protection from his chump. I’m sure stories and lies were told of the chump’s mental instability and anger at being left for the AP, you know we just can’t live without them. That’s why we’re calling at 2 am (when they don’t come home without reason) we’re obsessed and irrational etc.
In all seriousness what are we going to do? Cry enough to drown them with our tears of pain and sorrow?
For sure she’s not smart enough to realize she needs protection from Officer Glitterturd…
An Email from AP to XW (during the affair), enchanting her with tales of their glittering future life:
“Together we will swim, together yet independent. If you have to stop and find yourself I will tread water next to you.” The metaphor went on like that. I felt seasick reading it.
Six years later: they’ve broken off their engagement, moved five times, fight constantly, in deep debt, she’s working harder than she ever did with me, and twice a year she hoovers me saying she made the mistake of her life.
I think, “How’s the water? Oh, you’re drowning.”
“Here are some cement shoes to go with your bathing suit.”
I read an instagram post from my ex’s flapperhead which sounded very similar to what you’ve written above. I actually felt dumber after reading it. delusional idiots.
Hey and you are the one waving (not drowning) right?! You’ve got your head well above water now that you’re cheater-free. Chump victory!!!
Btw my xhole fancies himself as poetic and profound and is doubtless swamping his gf with all that crap. Way back when (married for 22 years before Dday last year when he revealed a decade of hookers and gay clubs) he did all that with me and am embarrassed to admit I was well and truly lovebombed.
You know how some people tell a story about the time they got into real trouble at the beach and nearly drowned and were waving frantically to loved ones onshore, who waved back because they thought the person was just being playful and it was all a misunderstanding that made a funny story much later, after the person was saved?
Here’s another story. We saw you waving. We knew it wasn’t playful. We knew you were drowning because of your own dumbass decisions out there. We’re no longer willing to risk our own life to save yours. We’re waving goodbye.
Btw the gf used to be a close friend of mine and knows everything. Spent a LOT of time w her in the months after Dday (her husband died a few years ago). Snake in the grass knows everything, including how much pain my kids have been in. He was in her bed 6 months after begging me to “work thru the problems in our marriage ”. They’re having a narcissist party now playing with their broken moral compasses together. She’s incredibly poetic and profound too, obviously. Buckets of kibbles.
Apart from the close friend bit (mine was his work colleague) exactly the same. Helped him work through everything cause he was in such a bad way by having an affair and guess what the outcome was? Yeah they are made for each other and she is incredibly poetic and profound. For now. His poetry is shit anyhow. Stupid Shit Cheaters Say? When asked if why if there had always been this problem between us he had settled down with me, had children, brought house etc the response was, ‘because I knew what we could have’. Then ‘life isn’t about what we have’. That is some huge pile of stupidity right there. Where their mo compass is pointing I know not but as long as it’s not pouring at me! Kibble-tastic indeed.
One of many songs on my I’m a Chump playlist was Brick. She’s a brick and I’m drowning slowly….
And then it occurred to me: Why should TWO people drown?!
So I left. And created an entirely new playlist. And it’s so fucking good!
How about, “you should have tested those shark-infested waters first, Ariel!”
Bwahahahahaha!
oh I think they tested those shark infested waters for years before we learned of it…
Oops, they still blew it.
BWahaha that’s some funny shit right there! She’s drowning while you are sitting on high, dry land!
David
If I ever get that exact Hoover in the future, I’ve rehearsed my comeback line…
“YOU SURE DID”
You’ve set the pace for a great day. This is awesome.
Ha ha, I like a bit of karma on a Friday afternoon. But to be honest, any man that came out with that drivel with me would be out the door with a rocket up his backside!
LOL, I read that his rocket up his backside.
Even better MissBailey!
LOL!! They’re drowning, funny comment. Also, it must feel so smugly good that she admits to making the biggest mistake of her life!! Yay you!
David,
SAVOR her remorse (well, the words to that effect) because most of us will never hear them. Even if the cheater feels them
and God knows they SHOULD….
The now (deceased) whore said “ your husband told me you date other guys” & when I confronted both of them
“He goes down on me ..not you”.
How sick was that? Unbelievable that he chose a low class bottom feeder to replace me. ????
Lol. I was going to ask “Why do they all seem to trade down?” It’s obvious the AP is so much ezr to control and the AP has so lower standards. Lol.
A true case of oh, he’s all yours. No way I’m taking that back.
“Of course he does. All dogs like to eat poop.”
I laughed out loud to that! Gonna add that to my playlist!
“I should talk with her, woman to woman. I’m sure we’ll be friends.”
Kiboshed that idea by telling ex I won’t be held responsible for my actions if I ever met the ho.
Mine cried when he told her I hated her and never to talk to him again, and said “If this* hadn’t happened, she and I probably would have been friends!”
*”this” was not the affair, rather “this” was my unjustly cruel response when I found out about it.
My cousin aka skankella. Told everyone that I was a bit job. That I only stayed with my stbx because of his money(I earned alot more than him). That I called her and screamed at her and threatened her. Funny how she screwed around with a cousins husband and I am the nut job.
Nut job not bit job. Sorry for the typo.
Recently saw the AP, my former friend, at a store for the first time in more than a year. She looked at me with big teary eyes and said, “he used me.”. It pissed me off a bit but really just makes me laugh. Pathetic.
Both my husband and my ex-husband cheated with my ‘friend’. I feel like an idiot.
I would not have been able to hold back….”Really, frickin’ Einstein!?!”
Girl, I would have laughed out loud right in her FACE!!
Oh and digging back deeper .. when I told my “friend” I was pregnant (I would first discover their text messages about four months later) with my daughter, she cried and exclaimed that, “babyTrusting is going to be my third child!” When my daughter was about six months old and I found more messages, I told cheater we needed to cut all contact, individual and as couples with these friends. He told me we couldn’t do that because they were just friends but AP “considers our daughter her third child”. Cheater was not present at the earlier conversation. It creeps me out so badly to think of them having conversations about my baby being her/their child.
AP’s want to steal your children ( easier than having your own), and to me that’s way worse than stealing your unfaithful spouse!
T123
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=09LTT0xwdfw
That is definitely creepy!
She said she didn’t want any drama – maybe don’t get involved with a married man with three grown children then!
In my experience, people who say they don’t wantn’t any drama are usually the people who cause drama.
I JUST realized exactly this ^^^^ recently, Lisalisa! When I hear someone say that now, I know who the director/actor is the performance. Drama. Pffft.
Yes! those that say they don’t want drama are the ones that are creating the drama, many times playing the victim.
They also usually the ones blaming others for causing drama after they’ve created drama.
(if that makes sense).
Perfect sense! !
That’s what my ex’s affair partner keeps saying. I informed her. From the beginning that it didn’t seem to bother her one bit when she was staying out with my husband all night after work while we were still married and under the same roof.
I also told her , ” If he cheated with u on me, he will cheat on you with me eventually ..” it took me exactly 10 months to prove that o could do it just for spite!!!
Soon as she found out ex and I had spent one night together. All’s o for from him was, ” Amanda is so heart broken, she wants to quit her job or change shifts” SLUT COWORKERS.
She sent me a text saying” It twinged just a little that he slept with you, but you. > meaning the wife, me< mean NOTHING TO HIM.
I told her BITCH PLEASE , HE IS STILL MY HUSBAND FOR THE MOMENT.
If she didn't want Drama she should of stayed home with her fiance where he still Sat and blindly believed she wasnt fucking around on him for another year. Til I clarified that story right on up by sending the fiance a screenshot of her on top of my husband making their very first AMATEUR PORN TOGETHER.
SPARCHIDE , Google that profile name up if you want a good laugh and see just a small taste of the shit I had to suffer with the last 3 years of our so called adulterous, lying cheating marriage..
Now she finally won.
She has my ex. My 19 yr old son living with them and has him turned against me , won't have anything to do with me now.
Because I'm the CRAZY UNSTABLE DRAMA QUEEN THAT CAN'T ACCEPT MY HUSBAND HAD MOVED ON!!
he Cheated SLUT, GET YOUR STORY STRAIGHT.
her turn will come to pay and so will his.
They both are staring in Shesahomewrecker.com as of yesterday.
Henderson Nevada..
Similar story here Dawn, they also turned my son against me. X ridicules me in front of my son.
When ever my son would spend time with me X will ridicule my son for spending time with me.
I can only assume the new wife accepts Cheaters behavior as normal and she’s a school counselor.
Maybe she’s too wrapped up in herself to notice.
New wife said she didn’t want to live with Ex with our son there so super Dad made son move out.
Our son goes to college full time and now works full time so he can live in a run down apartment.
I was curious… I googled it ???? why do I always have to do it!!!?! Why?
*facepalm* me too. I didn’t click the links though. Why? Such a unique user name to boot. Smh.
Let out your anger here . No judgement. Crazy shit will send you crazy.
I received an anonymous email of Narkles the Clown and the Flying Whore in the act.
When it happened I was “scared for life” a few years on its not quite funny but it’s eye rolling. Maybe one day I can get to “good laugh”
My ex and granny ho has turned my 19 and 17 year old against me also. I see them rarely and when I do, it is awkward. I occasionally hear when they want something.
Triple shit sandwich. It’s hard enough to have your marriage blow up, but then lose your kids also…that is why 9 years later, I am still not to “Meh”
Yup, very hard to come to peace when our kids were seduced away by them.
Same situation here. My older dd moved in with the ex and the slut over two years ago and I almost never hear from her now. All because here she had responsibilities and had to be a decent human being where as she can act like whatever she wants and literally do nothing over at her dad and the slut’s house. It is such a painful experience to lose your marriage, all your friends, your in-laws and the certainty of a future, but losing a child on top of it all… I don’t think I’ll ever recover. 🙁
Mine won’t even talk to me now that the bitch has moved in with my ex and my son. Known I get to see the pics she posts of my son and her son hanging out together.. And how much she LOVES those kids…bitch and ex husband are evil turning my son completely against me.. It sucks and I hope they both eat shit in the long run
Yeah, don’t make a fuss about it!
Hilarious!
“You never accepted me for who I truly am!!!”
Me: “I didn’t know who you truly were because you didn’t bother to tell me. I didn’t get to make an informed choice”
“Well, now you know, and you don’t accept me.”
Me: “This has nothing to do with accepting YOU. You lied and had sex with other people and drained our bank account. Being polyamorous doesn’t require lying, cheating, or stealing. That’s meanness, not polyamourousness. Preferring underage girls is pedophilia, not polyamorousness. Telling people lies about me is slander, not polyamorousness. I don’t have to be married to you to accept who you are. I don’t accept who you are because you’re horrible to me.”
” ” then “I’m sorry.”
Me: “The time for sorry is over. Now it’s time to divorce.”
“Why are you so mean?”
Me: “Conversation over.”
My cheater said, “you never really got to know me,” followed by a “I haz the sadz” look on her face. Then I asked, which “me” should I have gotten to know? The cheater who was living a secret life? Or the liar who betrayed me? Silence. Followed by more sadz.
Yep…this sounds familiar. The fact that three years of dating and just over 11 years of marriage resulted in my not knowing the “real” him, but she knew the real him right away.
And, who exactly is the “real” him? Liar? Cheater? Party-guy? Mentality of a single 25 year old? Peter Pan?
Whoa, did we marry the same guy?
Mine “knew he was polyamorous” for five years before telling me, then once he dropped the poly bomb, I got less than a week to adjust before he came out to tell me had a girlfriend!
Two years later, we divorced, I have a fantastic boyfriend, no debt, my own place, and he’s…well, I don’t CARE.
People that want to screw around with other people use the term “polyamory” as an excuse. Real polyamory means actually loving the people who are in the relationship…ALL OF THEM EQUALLY. It really doesn’t have a lot to do with sex, as most polyamorists (real ones) will tell you, it has to do with being in a loving intimate relationship with more than one person and all parties are fully aware of who is doing what with whom at all times. I couldn’t do it, but I have a friend who is polyamorist and she and her partner are very open and discuss all aspects of their relationship. They don;t have a third right now, but they are open to the possibility. Polyamory is an open relationship, but it’s different whereas open relationships usually just revolve around sex. Not many people can maintain an open relationship or a polyamorist one. Polyamory takes a LOT of work an all involved. It is said that less than 2% of the population in this part of the world can be successfully involved in an open relationship of any kind. Idk about statistics in country where polygamy is common. THat’s a whole ‘nother way of living.
Countries with Polygamy usually have women who had little to no choice in their marriage and so are happy that they are off-duty for sex and baby-making, women who hate the other wives virulently, or both.
Hear, hear! Very little intimacy in these marriages in those countries. People expect and seek intimacy and closeness from other familial relationships (children, siblings, aunties) and same sex friendships.
The model sort of works fine when raised in it.
I totally agree. I have some friend O call “actual poly” because they live it with honesty and integrity. I find that most people who use the term think it means sex with a variety of partners. That’s key-party swinging, not polyamory. Polyamory is a relationship term, not a sex life term.
Cheaters call swinging polyamory because they want to create the perception that it is possible to marginalized a privileged person with unilateral control (gained through deception) into a victim state. Because self-pity.
Ami
It is Shocking in Hindsight, to re-read these responses and see them through a CN reality lens.
My xw can become a 12 year old in her responses when confronted like this.
A Logical, Concise Reprimand/Admonition answered in two word sentences. Scary how they can camouflage their real 12 year old selves to us in the beginning.
The one on accepting him!!! Boy does that hit home hard!
No. I never did accept that you lied to me every time you spoke to me. I never accepted your drug abuse or porn addiction. I never accepted being insulted and called names. I never accepted you having a private life, separate from your marriage and family! I am just not a very accepting, person I guess. Poor victim, you! F*cking the toad girl you met in a bar and deserting your family was understandable, considering all the pain you must have endured by not being accepted.
Were you involved with my ex? Because those were almost his exact words in the exact same situation.
(There were crickets between my empty quotes. I guess even this site can’t stand his BS. ????)
Word for word. complete GOLD. And also same same for me. The absolute arrogance is astonishing.
I am trying to absorb the emotion of that exchange.
YOU are so mean.
You ARE the problem?
……’then – sorry’…….(for what?)
Very insightful – thanks for sharing Amiisfree!
awesome.
Cheaters new supply the day they announced their relationship to the church (my former church where he and I served together for more than a decade) the very week after cheater stood in front of the church and disparaged me for following through on my decision to divorce him. She stood and declared “People told me not to get into a relationship with him (because for eight years of his marriage to me he repeatedly cheated with men and hid it) but ‘God told me’ to be his friend and now it has blossomed into an amazing relationship and I am blessed”. Sadly if in the future she ever wants out of the relationship she will be held to the fact she declared God told her to do it. Stupid Girl!
She married him 12 months later, had the full white wedding despite it being the second time for both of them, vowed that she would be his helpmate and he was now the head of their family. It did not sit well with many who attended. They were couples selfie central until he got his dream honeymoon of a month in Paris not one couples selfie has been posted since and that was 2 1/2 years ago. I at least went into a marriage with him naive, she went in with both eyes open.
Stupid Girl is a few Commandments short of a tablet.
#alsohearsheaterventstalking
Oh, Thankful, keep us posted on any updates on how this ends. Yes, stupid girl is right! That didn’t sound like it was the voice of God who told her to befriend him.
Grab a glass of wine and pop the popcorn
Looking forward to any updates you hear from crazytown
Watching this space! This sounds like an epic ending.
Heh, heh, Brit, you have a wild imagination, you know me…,
“I’m not that kind of guy, I’m a man of integrity.”
After 20 years of marriage, holidays, celebrations, graduations, unemployment, moves across the country and a child together. “We have nothing in common.”
I also got that “man of integrity” comment. They really are all using the same playbook…
Same here…man of integrity… he just made mistake ( singular!!!) plus bonus “ everyone thinks I’m a great guy, and you see only negativity”
How many people know, that for the past 15 years cheated, lied, gaslighted, emotionally abused and exposed your wife/ kids to possible deadly diseases?
None.
Discussion over.
I also got the, “I get along with everyone but you Brit,” and the “everyone thinks I’m a great guy but you.” So Brit this only shows that there’s something wrong with you.
Not one of these people who thinks he’s a great guy has lived with him. Cheater hasn’t treated them with disdain or betrayed them. I think they would all feel much differently if they were to see who the great guy is behind closed doors.
Cheater is remarried now and I’m just patiently waiting for the honeymoon to end when he begins to show his true colors.
It might take time as he’s intent on proving to everyone that he’s so happy now with out me.
Funny thing is when he left me for his AP he claimed he had never been happier in his life and that relationship didn’t last. I have no reason not to expect the same of his current relationship. I don’t believe they’re ever genuinely happy. There’s always something for them to be miserable about and of course that wouldn’t be their fault.
“I took you for granted”
Honestly I thought my head would explode. “Took me for granted”. That was his big revelation about our marriage and what he did to me. Don’t you love the way he funnelled all this:
I lied every day to you
I set you up to take my mother’s abuse
I had emotional affairs with dozens of women
I had sexual affairs with others
I secretly exposed you to life-threatening diseases so you couldn’t protect yourself
I let you invest your family money in joint assets so I would get some of it later
I sabotaged every good thing that happened to you so you couldn’t really enjoy those memories
I told lies about you to others
I emotionally abandoned you
I sexually abandoned you
I wouldn’t take any responsibility for improving our relationship
I blamed you for anything and everything
I told our sons to lie to you
I blamed our eldest son for my porn
I stole three decades of your life
I believe I was better than you
into “I took you for granted”
D:
Scary , but I would have written all that
My cheaters list of offenses is not exactly this, but close enough and also went on for YEARS.
His summation statement was “I had a bad moment”.
Moment.
Fuck
He IS a bad moment. ????
BOOM! And I go the “I took you for granted.” line as well, and for many of the same BS actions you got. Did you get “You were always my world. My actions just didn’t match my feelings for you.”
That’s ok….my matching actions and feelings will make up for it.”
#divorcecleaners
I, just yesterday, got a text stating “I’m sorry this is where we’re at, I should have loved you better”.
Which would have been more then a blip on my radar had he not sent me almost 40 texts earlier that day telling me that I was “out to turn everyone against him” and he is “hit with waves of rumors and lies”. And that if i continue i will “unleash a storm, cause there is only so much i can handle”
i ignored every single one of them. expect when he texted me a question about a joint bill and then once he thought he had my attention he hit me again with a string of berating texts.
It’s almost like he forgets that he’s the one who cheated, who imploded our family, who constantly called me unattractive and fat, who never hung out with us cause he was drinking or locked up in his computer room.
Im happy i now recognize his cycle of charm, pity and rage so i can ignore it. He seriously just throws shit at a wall to see what sticks. God forbid he takes true responsibility beyond image management. Since this crazy text day took place 2 days after he sat down with me and apologized for everything he had done and told me he was going to do the hard work on his drinking and himself. Really he just wanted to feed me the bullshit and was upset when it didn’t shut me up about the cheating and general ahole he is on the regular.
OMG! I had this. String of abusive texts followed by ” we need to fix this …for the children.” I told his mother that I think he’s bi polar or something. Definitely distrubed. Would go on a rage then act like nothing. Whatever the reason I’m not interested . As candy staton said ” self – preservation is what it’s about today”
i basically told him, if he wanted to continue like this i’d be happy to show everybody else these texts and that i do not owe him a response to his anger, cannot control what other people think of him and his actions and will only reply to you in regards to the kids or logistics of this divorce.
The first part shut him up real fast.
Once you see it, you can’t not see it. It may be the single biggest bit of self-protection available.
It really is, i told my therapist it’s like i’m dealing with a completely different man then the one i was married to. And not because he’s acting any different but because I’m seeing it through the lenses of no-contact and separation. It’s indescribable the difference.
Email from HOworker AP:
“I know how you feel because I was cheated on once too.”
“There were problems in your marriage…”
What your feeling right now is hurt and anger, but dont focus it on me. You need to direct your focus to your marriage”
“I know you’re angry but you can’t email me at work”
The Howorker thought she was some kind of sage advisor, and thought she knew me because STBXH would tell her all about how awful his marriage was ???? meanwhile he was faking “loving husband and father” act at home.
And I knew their employer reviews employee email, and STBXH had already been fired over the affair (of course that wasnt the official reason, or what I was told initially) so I had a lot of fun emailing her at her work address. Nothing harassing or threatening, just facts like, “since you seem to look for sex partners at work, you really need to get your STI treated. Because once you know you have it and continue to spread it, that’s classified as criminal assault, according to the law. And if makes for very awkward and itchy meetings at work, so go get yourself the STD clinic already!
Hahahahaha, nothing says I love you more than a case of crotch rot!
Susan of Seattle was fired from the job she has where they met because she was a sales rep to Government purchasers and he was the govt purchaser so it looked like the company coerced with sex to sell their crap to the govt and they couldnt have that. Then-husband used a huge chunk of his professional clout to get her a new job.
I was all ready to email her at work and Cheater stood there trying to decide if he puts her at risk receiving “you nasty Ho” emails at her new job or if he should give me her private email address.
Looking back and with the current story of the wife killer in Texas, I now realize that Im lucky he didnt strangle me right there at my desk.
He gave me her email address but later she said she didnt understand what I said because I use big words. She graduated from The University of Washington (state).
All in all, she scarcely spoke to me…met her in person once (pre dday) she shook my hand and said it was so nice to meet me. ACK.
“itchy meetings at work”
Not funny, but funny.
Melissa,
YOU are Mighty!
After she received me email at her work email, she emailed me back IMMEDIATELY from a personal gmail account “you cant email me at my WORK”
I forwarded it and my reply right back at her work email: “yes I can! And get yourself to the STD clinic already “
Oh well done you on emailing her at work!
OW #1 (subsqently found to have three married men on the go) when confronted….
its real love I can’t help it
He resents you for giving him a disabled child
You’d like me if you knew me
OW#2 (was a friend) when confronted…
I am still your friend
After being told real friends don’t fuck their friends hubby – I didn’t mean to… he perused me
When told I would be naming her in divorce as she is a social worker…. i’ll Deny it – my reply ???? they live together duh.
OW2 has got me flashing on that scene in MP and the Holy Grail when John Cleese/Lancelot slaughters everyone at the wedding to save the damsel, only to find out upon arrival that it’s Prince Herbert:
“You only killed the bride’s father, you know.”
“Well, I didn’t mean to.”
“Didn’t mean to? You put your sword right through his head.”
“Oh dear… is he all right?”
“This is supposed to be a happy occasion. Let’s not bicker and argue about who killed who.”
😀
She has great tracks of land.
“It’s only a flesh wound!”
We wouldn’t be able to speak. I don’t speak Chinese; she doesn’t speak English. She did create a Facebook shrine directed at my “husband”…..she changed her name to our last name with the Chinese word for “heart” (xin) on both sides of it. Then she uploaded selfies in which she is wearing blue contact lenses (I have blue eyes). Then she added a download link for book the book “Feeling Good Again”. Then changed her profile picture to Celine Dion and Rene Angelil. The cheating partner and my “husband” had some inside thing about how she was going to take care of my “husband” when he gets old because she is so much younger than him
(She is ten years younger). If he has trouble communicating with me, and he’s still with her, I imagine he’s in for a big surprise when life gets real and the inevitable conflict starts. I agree that she is his “sole” mate (his spelling). He’s a heel and she makes them a pair. And I’m putting those shoes in the trash.
Celine apparently was the OW in his 1st marriage. Only she was underage at the time, so that’s just super creepy .
And the trying to look like you is beyond creepy. Yuck.
Are you sure she didn’t mean to put dollar or the Chinese word for money (qian) around their names?
Wonder what the Chinese word for “pond scum” is….wish I was an expert hacker…. I could have some fun with that FB page…
Tang ni, here ya go:
塘泥
Ooooh! Thank YOU, Tempest!!!!
Now how long can I resist modifying her co-opted moniker in the comments section on her page? Maybe I can get a Chump to do me a solid!!
Omg, Velvet! You made my morning!
“ I agree that she is his “sole” mate (his spelling). He’s a heel and she makes them a pair. And I’m putting those shoes in the trash.”
????????????????
Trying to make herself look like you, VH…that is beyond creepy.
…..and probably the stupidest thing they say, upon knowingly embarking on a cheatfest with a married person, is “OK”…….proof of rocks where brains and hearts should be….
My Dad’s mistress told me that I “would do well to remember there are two sides to every story.” This woman encouraged my Dad to step out on my Mom. She didn’t pursue him, it was more of a “let’s see if I can get this guy to leave his wife” kind of thing. I had told her off when she said that.
Yes, two sides — what happened, and how the floozy mistress wants it to appear it happened. 😉
“Two sides to every story”
Ummmmmm, “Hey, stupid. When ONE person in a relationship unilaterally takes actions clandestinely, there are NOT two sides — because most likely chump doesn’t even know they are fighting.”
Pieces of shit, the lot of them.
My mother in law said that to me when I told her of the affair
Haven’t talked to her since
They are always TEAM ——-
He imploded his first marriage the same way but lied to his parents that they didn’t get along
Guess what he said about us?? Talk about slander.
Cheater marriage wedding gift ideas:
Matching “I’m With Stupid” t-shirts
Blingy “Future X” baseball caps for the
wedding shower
The other half of the previous marriage
bedroom furniture ensemble
GPA devices. Hours of fun monitoring each
other!
Xanax for the “are they cheating on me too?”
perpetual anxiety
gallons of vodka for maintaining illusion of
How Their Marriage Is Going To Be
Different
BS phrase book with translations for
interactions with chumped X’s
The Sluterus signed off the one email she ever sent me as The Future Mrs. Slab O’ Meat.
I told her, You mean Mrs. Slab O’Meat the Fourth? The Cavalry of Former Mrs. Slab O’Meats will be happy to chip in on a nice set of paper plates that will last as long as your marriage.
…and you can be SURE they didn’t register at Smart & Final…..
Love you Luz!!
Velvet Hammer, LOL!!!!! 🙂
Good for you Susannah! You’re Mighty! Xxx
Go you! Wish more children in these situations had that privilege. ..yo speak up.
“The marriage was already over.”
“I have to have money to live, also!” (claiming victim status)
The ow told me…. I wouldn’t want to be in your shoes.
She seriously did. She was married with three grown kids. Her kids are now a mess.
My kids are great! I wonder how that’s working for her now?
Rich, coming from someone who is trying to fill your shoes!
Changed to my hairdresser, cut hair the same style, sent adopted child (didn’t want to lose her figure in case he strayed! Nothing like twuu wuvv, is there) to the same school. Heck, she’d wear my knickers if she could!
Good question!
“If you wouldn’t want to be in my shoes, why are you stealing them and wearing them?”
Today I am really having a hard time deciding who wins the Best Gobsmacking Gibberish From An Insane Idiotic Cheating Accomplice Oscar…..
“I’m offended! I’m a Christian and have morals and integrity! Your wife must be pretty insecure to think there was anything going on! I think too much of myself to LET your wife think that of me!”
This, after Shrek-in-drag was called out for dressing up, showing up at his hotel in the guise of ‘it’s easier if we ride to the restaurant together. And no, I don’t want to go out with the group. No, I don’t want you to bring anyone else. Say it with me: what kind of single woman shows up at a married man’s hotel to pick him up for dinner in a town he already knows well?
“She’s just hurt right now!” Said the Witless Wonder in defense of Shreky Poo’s comment on D-Day.
“Nothing inappropriate happened!” Shrek-in-drag insisted. Sure, even though Witless admitted to at least sexual banter and innuendos – the same kind of verbal volleys he does with everyone he knows well. (Unfortunately, that was true).
“WTF was I thinking?” I said, after looking back at the years I wasted on Witless.
Yep. I got one of those OWS too. Fake Christian.
“I want to be a resource for you.” Like, wtf? You want to help me deal with the affair that you’re having with my husband?!
The OW emailed to me: I know how you feel because I was cheated on once too.
Was she tried to build some sort of comraderie? Like we’re all in this together! Wtf? I told her where she could take that BS
Good for you! Sometimes I honestly think their brain cells have sloughed off… And yes. She was trying to build a relationship with me—like let’s all be one happy family living on a commune! (My ex likewise can’t figure out why we can’t all have Thanksgiving dinner together this year: her, him, me and our five kids) Um. No.
AP said to wasband, maybe you need to talk with her so she can become the wife and mother she should have been from the start.
After 10 years of cheating and chumpy- ness on my part, after the last round of discovering him screwing around he declared “I think I’m just not meant to be married!”
Um great, fantastic.
Oops I mis read the assignment. I’ve had limited contact but one of his many APs told me “he really loves you”. I’m sure as they screwed each other silly, they were discussing his great love of me.
I also got something similar “don’t worry all he ever told me was how amazing you are”, was this Pre or post coital sweet nothings??!!
Yikes! And that got her in the mood? It boggles the mind.
Firstly The ow told me that “she was a married woman with 3 children, she would never do that!” Then after discovery, “people don’t get divorced because of something like this, it was meaningless. It was just an extension of friendship, a part of the job and felt completely natural!” maybe to you bitch, but it definitely didn’t and still doesnt feel meaningless to me and my children. Also I don’t think he had slept with any other clients as “part of the job” before! She had obviously done this before – bored housewife shagging the builder, they are such a cliche.
My jaw dropped , let me pick it up and ask this: are they in the porn industry? As far as I know that is the only screwing that is part of the job. Fucking unbelievable!
“Yes, I got in a relationship with a man that I care for deeply and that has made mistakes as we all have. None of us can claim perfection. Cancer is not a reason to stay in an unhappy situation where you feel bullied, belittled and controlled. By the way, he also admits fault in the demise of your marriage, something you have not done (in communications I was included on). You have, however, admitted that you did not want him to leave, even after you knew he had cheated… so it’s okay for you to want him but no one else? Is he to be discarded to live the rest of his life in penance?”
Similarly I’ve been told, “You keep trying to pin this on me. You are partly to blame too.” Sure, I could have been a better husband, but that could be said about anyone. She blew up our marriage and family with her affairs. I had NO part of that. Combining any marital problems with her affairs is not ok. Two completely separate things.
“Yes, you’re right. One of my biggest faults is MISPLACED LOYALTY.”
ARGH! “… he also admits fault in the demise of your marriage, something you have not done …”
KK continues to latch on to this. Sorry you have to deal with it but I’ll confess some relief that I’m not the only one.
So much blame they figure they will share. Mine told me I needed to own my part in the marriage failing and for a split second I thought to. Then I said f uk that noise! He is not flipping this script. I told him no. I am not taking responsibility for what he did. No way! The only thing I own is not leaving him the first time he cheated.
“he also admits fault in the demise of your marriage, something you have not done (in communications I was included on)”
My thoughts are, why should have to communicate my faults to her? She’s the OW! I did admit some of my faults to my ex before we were ex’s., when I was still going to therapy and pick-me dancing (something she also shames me for).
And I just LOVE “that has made mistakes as we all have”. Um, my mistakes didn’t blow up one family and instantly create a new one before doing anything to end the marriage. I didn’t lie. I didn’t cheat. I asked him to text if he was going to be late for dinner. I sometimes went to the bar and got him if he didn’t come home by dinner. I took hold of the finances when he hadn’t paid the gas bill in 5 months. I told him he could help clean the house when he complained that I didn’t keep it clean enough. I guess that made me a bully?
I would LOVE to know what he admitted to being his faults in the marriage because to this day he has never admitted any fault to me that did not blameshift.
Also “Is he to be discarded to live the rest of his life in penance?” But apparently it’s ok to discard a wife with cancer and your child too so you can go out partying to find another wife appliance.
Uuum, exactly how were you able to control and bully him while weakened by severe illness and fighting for your very life? That silly bitch! Is she that stupid or that cold? Does she have a charcoal briquet rattling around in her chest where a heart should be? Or a tumbleweed rattling around in her head where a brain should be? If cancer isn’t a reason to stand by someone and not harm them, I’d like to know what the hell is!
And you never should, UXworld.
If her argument is that you were not a perfect spouse, so it’s partly your fault, she’s full of it. None of us is capable of being a perfect spouse. What we owe our spouses is to be the best spouse we can be, not perfection.
Now, sadly, this also means that many cheaters meet that requirement. They were the best spouse they could be. Unfortunately, they are just really crappy at being a spouse, and it’s all right for someone to say to them, “Sorry, but your best just wasn’t enough for me, so we’re separating.”
It doesn’t shock me to hear that KK would say something like, “I wasn’t perfect, and I admit some fault in the end of our marriage. You haven’t done so, so that makes me more self aware and enlightened than you are.”
Yikes! KK sounds like my Dad and his now-wife. So busy being enlightened…they make a point of telling me they could never live where I live because it’s a red state.
My Dad sent me an email explaining about how they needed to move to a state on the east coast to be close to “the kids”. *Her* kids are all in mid-Atlantic or eastern states, I’m 1000’s of miles away – and I’m his only biological child. Am I not a kid, now?
I found a card made on artisanal paper with high school-level drawings of hearts, flowers and peppers (a symbol of sexuality in my country) wherein flatterfuck welcomes sparkledick back from a trek up a very high peak and tells him that her litter heart, oops, little heart was shrunken with worry while he was gone.
The card was on the night table of our bedroom, right after sparkledick pleaded with me to reconcile with him (“don’t you miss your Little Bug?!?”).
Barf. I hate being treated like a …. chump.
I have a no contact order against the ow/baby mama that my husband had two kids with during our marriage. She attacked me on Christmas in front of my kids and pled guilty to menacing. She broke the no contact in July by calling me to tell me my husband was still sleeping with her. She just couldnt resist despite it being a condition of her probation- shows just what type of nut he decided to join himself with. Well I informed her on the phone that she was going to jail because she cannot contact me. She says, “but I’m not harrassing you”. Freaking idiot. No contact means just that, no contact. Well just got an update, she was finally arrested last night after I reported the violation in late July. She is in jail with no bond. We will have a hearing within 72 hours but she will likely have to do 30 days. My husband tried to make me let it go but I need this leverage to make sure this beast stays away from me and my kids. Maybe her lawyer will explain to her the legal definition of harassment.
If he’s still protecting the OW, perhaps time to let the husband go, too?
He is and you are 100% right. That is the next step I am working on as we speak.
Life is a lot easier without a 200 pound man standing on your neck. You can do this life sooooo much better alone.
Excellent boundaries! Mighty. Crime, punishment. Now they can be 100% sure you are serious.
I tried to get an order keeping Misty away from my kids since she has a documented history with Child Protective Services. The best I got was that neither of us could introduce the kids to a “romantic interest” within the first year after I filed for divorce. She wasn’t on the currently active registry through CPS so despite her past as a shitty and neglectful alcoholic parent, I couldn’t keep her away from my babies. Ex even broke the no contact rule by facetiming her all the time around the kids so he could technically say he was following the order despite not actually doing so.
Damn, what an evil slag. The child-abusing cheaters are probably not a rarity. After all, cheaters are amoral scum who only care about their own pleasure. The crazy drunken bitch who helped ruin my life actually brought her daughter on one of their dates, pretending they were just friends, but reaching out for his hand when she thought the girl wouldn’t notice. She also brought him around the house to go for romantic walks around the neighbourhood (with a drink in hand, naturally) and made sure the kids saw him. They are in their teens, so they had to know what was really going on. Teenage girls are astute about such things.
Those kids are now scarred for life.
I made sure to tell her husband about her emotional abuse of their children. That de-fanged her in a hurry.
He sounds a right shite.
I hope she has to serve at least 30 days. I almost feel badly for her attorney because that is a special level of stupid.
You aren’t with your husband still right?
I like hearing that cmh…..Yep – she’s an idiot.
“How ya like THOSE consequences?”
????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
The Dream Princess said:
‘I don’t want to be a home-wrecker!’
(So respect our marriage and stop allowing him to visit you when he’d agreed with me to have no contact with you? Stop talking to him because ‘When one of my friends is in need I will always comfort them’, when he had agreed with me not to contact you. When he comes over and tells you he loves you, don’t see him again!)
‘If I had really known you, none of this would have happened.’
(Trans: Was having far too much fun with the psychodrama and the triangulation and the attention from stbxh to even remember that you were human)
” take care of him.” ( As if I had been the one abusing him. )
” I wasn’t the only one?” ( After I told her she was not the first person he had cheated with)
” He gave me herpes” ( enjoy that gift boo)
“He told me you were separated.” And you didn’t think it was weird that he couldn’t have you over to “his place” for the first three months you dated?
“You can’t charge me with Adultery. I’m going to charge you for Libel.” LOL… I can, I did… you can’t, you didn’t.
His final OW was so fresh from her own divorce, she asked this in front of my teenage stepdaughter:”Do I still send Christmas cards to his family?” YUP – she was ready to be a new relationship… no wonder Mr. Sparkles swooped her up.
As for Mr. Sparkles, this is the cake topper:”I must’ve gotten the genital crabs from the hotel room blanket while we were Mexico.” Apparently, he was part of the >5% population who get crabs that way.
<5%…
“He would not cheat on me if we married. I am sure he would never be able to cheat on a ‘true wife’.”
Hahahahaaa. Total narcissist.
“You May be right. But if what you say is true, that can only mean your DDay is coming.”
Look up the word “true”, cheater!
???? oh gosh! ‘ true wife’ ! LMAO! I’m sure if you were not so hurt and shocked you’d have busrt out laughing at the level of delusional grandeur.
These people are nuts. Absolutely mad! Oh gosh! They will die if they are not ‘ special’. They need to be. I guess that is why ignoring them is such a killer.
I take joy in ignoring my cheater. Nothing makes me happier than not having to interact with him. I don’t even have to try to ignore him. It takes effort now to notice him. ” Oh! Didn’t notice you there!”
‘true wife’
I just made a horrible face.
I never heard this from OW but Im sure this sort of crap was bandied about.
It’s what they all believe–that they are sooooo special that even a serial cheater will stay faithful to them. Lotsa luck with that, honey.
“He’s my soulmate. You’ve never really seen me.” Soulmate then stops talking to her somewhere between her offering to meet him in a second hotel room and her moving out to couch surf when I asked her to (because she chose him, fucking pick me dance …).
As a Chump who really doesn’t know anything about the OW, the single, solitary thing that cheater told me she said was, ” she feels bad” about taking him away from our little girl.
This was said on DDay and in my anguish I immediately, (knee jerk) asked, ” What about me?” Cheater replied “We never talked about you.”
Such a big kind heart mystery OW had. I can only imagine how extra bad she would feel if she knew I was in first trimester pregnancy at this time. And, extra, extra bad if she knew of the ectopic pregnancy that I almost died from about a year before this.
Chumps, I read your posts, thinking, knowing, we can’t make his shit up.
I will always try to make the most of each day, to be a person with integrity, and most important to me, to be kind.
But, there are so many things I can never, never forget!
To be able to share with CN, to get it out, to real people who understand. Priceless!
((((((CN)))))))
Peacekeeper–your story just makes me angrier at your husband. Men who cheat on their pregnant wives are lowest of the low. You deserve so much better.
Tempest,
I cry when I read your poignant post replies to me, they touch my very soul, they truly are poignant, ( in the heart rendering meaning of that word). That someone, such as you, could take the time to reach out to me, well, I am at a loss for words.
Thank you Tempest.
I respect and admire you so much.
Cheater will say to me, “That was so long ago.” ( the affair). I try to tell my heart that, but my heart says, “It seems like only yesterday.”
Thank you for caring Tempest.
❤️
I too feel so bad for Chumps who were cheated on when the Chump is pregnant. Any time that children are involved just seems like a double, triple, quadruple, whammy. I want to hug all the innocent Children.
Yes! I’m not much of a writer, but then again I don’t need to be when others at CN write what’s in my heart!
Schoompie told my adult son
“ I thought me and your mom could be friends someday”
Unbelievable ????????
The OW was a former best friend of mine, and ex had the nerve to “thoughtfully convey” her wish that we could someday be friends again when I got over “all this.” Right. Because I want friends who go about blowing up families like it’s nothing, who can lead double lives like some sort of sociopath and who fake having emotions and feelings like compassion, love and support. No thanks. I’d rather be alone.
Yeah Cakeless, don’t we all want friends that make us cry ourselves to sleep at night? These people are deranged.
“I may be a whore for fucking your husband but what does that make you”
I didn’t even know how to respond to that, it shocked me, but I wish I would have asked what she thought it made me, because it made me a betrayed wife and friend! But I guess in her mind it made me something worse than a whore
“I’m the victim in all this” I will never understand how she thinks that
“This is the worst thing I’ve ever done” – well I would think living with your Husbands brother and telling all of us the two of you were married when you weren’t, then having kids with both of them and making your children brothers and cousins, I would think that’s the worst think you ever done.
“It just happened” well not from the text messages and evidence I found she pursued him persistent and relentlessly
“It just happened,” was what I was told as well. Yep, just walking down the street in their dicks just happen to fall into strange pussy. Yep, happens everyday. ” DUCK, IN COMING!”
It’s the frigidity narrative. You know, the cheater wouldn’t need a smorgasbord of strange if the partner at home was a good enough slave. Dance, puppets, dance.
APs are objectified robots who think their only value (and everyone else’s) is sexual. Their opinions of us are absurd and invalid.
“What does that make you?”
Still the one with the marriage certificate, bitch.
Mine’s Schmoopie was outraged to discover he had been sleeping with me the whole time. Hello? How gullible can you be?
I know right! And the whore was supposed to be my friend and we talked about things, ya know, I would brag about sex with my Husband. She knew we were still sleeping together so she can’t play that damn card, that he told her we weren’t having sex, she knew better, she might as well been wearing my used panties!
and later…the one with half his 401K.
….and half the Social Security…..
“It makes me the STBXW of loser husband material….here’s your Dog Poop trophy!”
LOL! loved that BB!!! what a dumb-ass
OM: “Your marriage has been dead and lacking in affection for years.”
Umm, that would be news to me, her husband. And how the *&@! would you know?
You: “Yes it was. Because of her acting and lying expertise, I found out I was married to a romantically challenged emotionally unavailable morally bankrupt lying cheating zombie. Enjoy!”
We can’t make “this” shit up
(Sorry for typo)
When I complained that “OW was stalking me on Social media/Icloud/Google.”
Cheater solemnly said; “No, she’s not. I know the high caliber of woman she is.”
Cheater said he was going to divorce me and apply for an annulment of our marriage from the Catholic church … after 30 years. He insisted that I was GOING to go along with it.
Chumpme, incredulous: “You are forcing to a tribunal? You think I’m actually going to lie to a Catholic PRIEST? Do I LOOK like I want to get fried by lightning in the church parking lot!?!?!”
Cheater: “Why not? You would benefit to.”
{The infamous “Let’s fool Jesus” stunt.}
I’m sure till this day I’m blamed for OW being considered a sleeze, and them not being able to get married at the alter…….
From his level, she probably did appear to be a higher caliber……
I cant remember how I got into a phone conversation with Cheater about how he might navigate his Catholic tradition if he ran off with Susan. He ended up explaining that all they have to do is be together at Church and show up, if the Priest doesnt know them, they can both take Communion and no one would be the wiser. “People do it all the time”.
Unbelievable! Does he realize that that is blasphemy and that can send him straight to HELL? It just goes to show that these people are all cardboard cut-outs who do not believe in anything. You can’t impression management fool GOD. The pile up of sins required for that stunt is mind boggling: adultery against the spouse, fornication with the AP, lies of commission, lies of omission, failure to confess mortal sins, capped off with sacrilege and blasphemy! Yeah no biggie…people do it all the time. Yep, then they spend eternity being devoured by and shat out by Satan.
So, does this mean my cheater is better than your cheater because mine *did* stop going to communion? Like, she’s an adulteress but she’s not a dishonest adulteress?
She did stop going to church about five years before I found out about the exit affair; that (and a couple of odd remarks she made over the years, plus some changes in sexual proclivities) have made me wonder whether she had a starter affair (or two or three?) before she found someone who was willing to blow up his marriage for her.
When I asked information, she said she didn’t want to get involved.
Don’t want to get involved? It’s a bit late for that you involved yourself!
Crazy. She didn’t seem to mind getting involved with his penis. When I don’t want to be involved with someone, I like to include their genitalia in that deal.
Exactly that ????
Selfish delusional people who just don’t seem to see any wrong in their actions!
When I first found out about ExHole’s relationship with OW and him swearing he wouldnt see her again. I sent her a Myspace message. She flat out told me “What happens between Exhole and you is none of my business. If you feel you need to talk to me about it, I will listen, though. Conversely, what happens between Exhole and me is none of your business.”
I beg to fucking differ.. it damn sure is(was) my business as! I told her that as long as there is a legal binding contract (if we were going to play the not-labeling-but-legal-distinctions-could-apply game) between Exhole and I, everything was my business. That shut her up.
Wow, Feral, maybe we have the same OW blow up our marriage. My exhole’s mistress said the same damn thing, talking about, “What’s between he and I is between he and I”. Probably only 1 brain cell.
I never had any contact with any of the OW except the last one who barely counts since I was on my way out of the marriage when she slithered off her stripper pole and into his life. She called me a couple of times before I blocked her. The first time she recited a list of emotional and physical abuse she allegedly suffered at my ex’s hands and then asked me if I ever missed him and wished we were still together. Uh… nope. He’s all yours. The second time she gave much the same spiel but then added a rant about how it was my responsibility to get my adult children to have a relationship with their dad and since I didn’t it meant I was a terrible mother. LOL, okay. I’m not taking parenting advice/criticism from a former (maybe) stripper who lost custody of her own young children due to her lifestyle and drug abuse.
During their affair, one of the only OW who wasn’t a stripper posted a meme of Jesus on her FB page with a caption that read something like “Would you answer your door if Jesus knocked?”. I really wanted to comment “Would you answer your door if Jesus knocked while you were banging my husband?” but I didn’t. 😀 😀
HOWLING HERE! LOL!
????????????…….????????????????????
Text messages from the 15 year older, 3x divorced, professional divorce attorney, who had named herself as a witness in our divorce and hired her own attorney to represent her. I was beginning my 9th month of pregnancy. She’d already been warned repeatedly to leave me alone by the attorneys, and I had personally asked her repeatedly to leave me alone. This is the last communication I had with her. Further attempts by her went unanswered.
OW: Got any new screenshots (of him hitting on you).
Me: Yes. (Sends several screenshots were he says how “horny” I make him and he wants to touch me, etc.)
OW: Anything with the date on. Otherwise he’ll just deny and say you sent them to yourself.
Me: These messages are from a few days ago. Then ask to see his phone if I’m not telling the truth…that’s easy!
OW: He scrubs his phone. Deletes everything. I did see all the stuff from a couple of weeks ago and since then he’s been an ‘open book’ but everything is deleted.
Me: An open book with everything deleted….
Me: Listen: this is the 4th time we are doing this…like a broken record…this needs to stop. I need to co-parent with this man and I can’t be the tattle tale anymore. I could show you texts from the last 4 days that you know what they say (and tell you about conversations – not to mention him reaching out to friends and neighbors for help)….but I don’t belong in this triangle…you chose a lying, cheating, manipulative alcoholic…I don’t want anything to do with this…and frankly I don’t think either of you have for one moment put yourself in my shoes.
An open book, with everything deleted. No thank you!
–your marriage was over
–you did not treat him right
–i respect him.
–oh honey, you don’t know me. I am still married.
All told to me by the troll the day I found out about her. I had called him and asked for the money to file divorce, he hung up on me. Then she called me from his phone.
Years later
–stop making him feel bad. It’s what you do
–you have to accept that we are in a relationship
–we go everywhere together that is what people in a relationship do
“You have to go everywhere together. That’s only way to keep tabs on where his tiny dick is.”
exactly. . .. . and now he is doing the disappearing thing on her like he did on me and she is calling me or having a friend call me asking if i know where he is.. .. umm. NOPE. and he is not my problem anymore. i guess you are not going everywhere together anymore since your ass dont know where he is at. lol
but SHE RESPECTS HIM.. .. haha (i did not mention that she said that right after running his low rise truck over the curb, scrapping his running boards and most likely bent his special rims but she RESPECTS him.. . indicating that I, his wife, did not)..
#youcantlogicwithcrazy
#ihavemypeace
Maybe she is just using the ALTERNATIVE DEFINITION of “respect”?
????
When I found the emails between Ex and the OW, I didn’t know whether I should cry or laugh. There wasn’t much to be said, apparently. He was sending her links to songs on you tube (“you are so beautiful”) and she was sending him photos of full moon…I mean, really?! he’s 51 for God’s sake!!! 😀
When a friend informed “PickANumber”(who was cheating on her husband and small children),that we discovered there were many before her(she had been telling everyone he was a great family man, but theirs was a love too great to give up), that boxes of cards and letters from one AP spanned 4 years and gushed “Always and Forever”,
PickANumber replied….”Oh, I heard about that, NotAPilot said she’s just a helicopter pilot he fucked for the thrill of it, I’m the love of his life.”
Like the cheater, the AP will make any excuse and justification to do…..whatever .
My ex told me all the classic playbook BS
I love you but was never in love with you. I have always cared for you but something was always missing. I have never met anyone like her. I have never felt this way about anyone ever. I didnt even realize I was unhappy until I met her. I want us to work things out and hope we survive this (while he is looking at apts to move out) The kicker though, Im leaving you for her but i never said I wanted a divorce and never even considered it until you brought it up just now. Oh wait I forgot the I know I cheated and gave no warning I was ending our life together for that I am sorry. Do know that for 12 years you were my best friend and I hope we can stay that way.
Omg…..my ex was almost identical.
I was his best friend.
He had a ‘special connection’ with the OW and he didn’t know if it would lead to marriage or not, but he felt he had to explore it.
He wasn’t happy for years nope! a long time nope! a long, long time, nope! 3 months, nope! A long time!
He also didn’t love me for years, months, decades – it really depended on what spin he was trying to sell.
And…..He left, moved in with the OW so I filed for divorce. He tells everyone including our kids and also in his affidavit in our divorce that Calm filed for divorce – I just want a month to really think about my emotions.
They are all gross.
Serial killers also have “special connections” …..so do stalkers…..
“Unhappy for years” is longhand for “liar”
I heard THE SAME EXACT SHIT and woke up today feeling GLAD HE IS GONE. A miracle.
The only time I talked to the OW she informed me that she did not really think he was sexy, very cute but not sexy but he made great money and she see could see a great future with him.
She was living with a man at the time so she was terrified the 2 year workplace affair would come out. Well Ex and her broke up before the divorce was final and she went on to marry her live in partner. They live in our subdivision and my son has to face them at the pool all summer. New husband never found out as far as I know.
Ex told me they broke up because she wanted to stay home like I did, he told her he already had a lazy one at home, did not need another one. My thanks for raising our kids and taking care of his mother.
What an asshole.
When it came time to tell all (which I’m sure I still got far from the real story)… HoHub had an affair with a girl he worked with. After two days of fucking (when he told me he was at a team members ‘farewell’ bash) they finally were reflecting on the facts. She apparently kept lamenting ‘I wish you weren’t married.’
No shit Sherlock. Me too. #obvs
In a letter I received from the teenager OW she talked about how she had known for a long time that she was a selfish person. Then she admitted to knowing that I was pregnant and had a 2 yr old child when she met him. Then she said it was just sex but then she started to have feeling for him ????.
The best part was when she said she was worried that she couldn’t trust him and that he may do the same to her.
They lasted 10 months post d-day, 4 months after I gave birth without him and one month post our divorce being final. Not because he cheated but because her family saw behind the mask.
He then wanted me to accept his apology because he now knew what it felt like to be hurt so deeply.
MightyMamaBear,
He has NO idea of the incredible pain you suffered! NO idea.
Hugs to YOU and your little ones!!
Said to me by STXH about the OW during mediation session:
“Would it make you feel better if you met her?”
Even the mediator looked at STXH like he was an idiot!!!
You never loved me…
The OW is a “subservient woman” who thinks she hooked herself a protector and provider for herself and her brats.
Newsflash his former lifestyle was subsidized by his professional wife and meanwhile he lives in constant threat of layoffs and rain out days. But the cash from equitable distribution of the house sale will run out eventually….
Meanwhile she likes to post on social media crap quotes about women being put here to do things men can’t do not everything men can do… virtuous women bible verses…. happy spouse happy house #husbandsdeservehappinesstoo….
Oh and how blessed my son is to have a “Bonus Mom” even if SOME people can’t appreciate it.
She can suck it at her menial receptionist job and serve lukewarm coffee and pussy to her superiors all she wants. I’m applying for a Masters program in my male dominated profession and can teach my son to hunt and fish myself because I’m a badass like that.
(I can cook, sew, and contour makeup with the best of them I just prefer playing in the dirt with the guys so sue me!!)
The misogynist bastard is clearly intimidated by strong women because he knows he’s a weakling. My asshole was the same. Some of his excuses; “I was intimidated by your intelligence” and “She never challenged me or disagreed with me”. So, a dumbass with no opinions. Sounds like a fascinating person well worth losing everything for.
I’m convinced most male cheaters are either closeted or overt misogynists. That’s why they feel entitled to cheat, but would be outraged if their wives did the same.