Where Are They Now?

I’m considering making a video of me removing a transmission from an Impala while scratching my balls on occasion. I wonder how many views I could get?

Further proof that the OW is not chosen for substance.

My Narc Ex went from a 6 figure leadership job to retail sales. Selling mattresses. Now, I normally don’t judge anyone for any work. You have to do what you have to do to survive. And work is always honorable. But I’ll make an exception for him. Because the real karma here landed on schmoopie. Ah, she slept with her boss, thinking she was getting something special: a talented, hard-working go-getter, who was interesting and intelligent.

????????????

The night I kicked him out and part of my “go fuck yourself, loser” speech, I said to him, “They* were stalking my social media, probably thinking they found themselves a winner! Look at the nice life he gives her: trips to Europe, dinners out, Broadway shows, a nice house, wine tastings etc. Well, they have a big surprise coming, because they were dating ME.”

I was the one who thought up and planned every single thing that we did. I tried to let him plan things, but he wouldn’t. Oh, he’d act like he “tried”. Half-ass it and then make the sad puppy dog face because he’d failed.

Again, I don’t judge anyone’s tastes to be any better than anyone else’s. Just different. My point is that he presented himself as something he is most definitely not.

So, now she has a mattress salesman 17 years her senior, who is a cheater, and has an inclination for erotic massages. ????????????????????

* he had two (at least) OWs. The longest term one lost out.

Where are they now? Oh boy.

The OW is sitting in a jail cell with a $150,000 bond for various drug charges.

And I was the scold, the nag for kicking him out for his drug use.

Filthy Romeo hasn’t bailed her out. She’s been stuck there since May.

I paid my ex $190k as a one-time maintenance buyout payment as part of our divorce settlement. I took the deduction of that payment as alimony because it met all the IRS criteria (this was in 2016). I was audited and the IRS denied that deduction. They then told me I owe $80k in back taxes, penalties and interest.
I appealed the decision and took it all the way to the US Tax Court. Last Tuesday, I finally got the IRS to agree that it was a legitimate deduction for me (2.5 year ordeal).

If the payer gets to claim alimony as a deduction, the payee must claim it as income. My ex did not claim the alimony as income (I know for a fact because she had to show me her return for that year).

Now that I have been allowed the deduction, I suspect she will get audited. She could potentially be hit with the $80k tax bill. She is golfing in Scotland with her OW right now. She is going to be in for quite a surprise when she returns????

Justice Served

A dream of mine has always been to buy a historical home with a little mother-in-law suite for my little sister to live in when she’s older. (She’s autistic) I wanted my husband to finish school so he could realize his dreams. I wanted to save money for the future so I insisted we both work. (We had no kids, so why shouldn’t he work?) But that was all before he cheated on me with his 25 year old Shankenstein because he says I was putting too much pressure on him to work, go to school, buy a house, take care of my sister (That’s right! He blamed my autistic little sister for his cheating.) Two years post divorce he has quit his job, quit school (Shankenstein did too BTW) and both moved in with Mom/Dad. Meanwhile, I worked harder, bought a little historical home (With a mother-in-law suite) finished writing a book and returned to school to finish my degree. **mike drop**

My STBXH ended up having to live in a shed in his Grandmother’s backyard. Howorker, after realizing that I paid for everything and that his family would never accept her, even going so far as to call her a dumb whore to her face has dumped him. Now he is facing some serious criminal stuff that will deny him access to my daughter (due in 5 weeks!)
And all of his friends have now started to cut ties with him as well and there’s a rumor that he has been harassing ex-howorker as well trying to get her to talk to him, but that could just be her own fuckedupness coming through.

Yeah, his life is shit. He tries to whine to me about it all the time, but since I give him no response other than the “Cool, Wow, Bummer” he is starting to realize that I don’t need to care about him anymore. He imploded all of our lives for nothing and now he gets the consequences. I’m just gonna sit back, drink my sparkling water out of a fancy glass (my pregnant way to kick back with a drink) and focus on my baby girl.

When my kids were young we bought some land with the intention of building a log cabin on it when we could afford it. My parents gifted us the money so that we could go ahead and build it while our kids were young enough to enjoy it. Before the cabin was completely weather-tight, we were invaded by Asian Beetles (those little fuckers that look like ladybugs but aren’t) and wasps. Once those things get inside, it’s really hard to get them out again and believe me, we tried EVERYTHING. So every fall as soon as the weather started getting cool, hoards of bugs would appear. Once those stink bugs arrived it was even worse. Every trip to the cabin in fall and through the winter and spring started and ended with vacuuming (by me, of course) to try to stay ahead of the invasion. You literally couldn’t turn on a light without getting 10-20 bugs crawling on the light shade. And those beetles STINK really bad. Fast forward to the divorce when ex gets the cabin in the settlement even though my parents gave us the money to build it because ex has all of the documentation of the gift and won’t produce it. So my annual bit of karma will start in the next few weeks as the weather starts to get cooler and the bugs start their migration inside the cabin where ex and his former (?) stripper, felon fiance are living full time. I bet it’s a lot of fun dealing with the bugs every day and not just on weekends and vacations. I hear the stink bugs are going to be really bad this year. Maybe F(?)SFF can post a Rielle-style video of herself vacuuming up bugs? Hahahahahahahahaha

Darn! About a month ago, a post prompted me to write a somewhat detailed account of how Karma has treated POP (Predatory Opportunistic Parasite). I wish I had copied it so I could paste it here rather than burn the brain cells on doing it again 🙂

Suffice it to say, he’s f*cked in all sorts of ways. He’s the type that never learns, thinks he’s made of teflon, neither the basic rules of society nor the law apply to him. Finally in the later years of his life that delusion keeps being proven wrong. He’s gained a pretty intimate knowledge of the justice system and mounting legal fees. DWI’s and probation violations….guaranteed to piss of the judge. I know this due to access to public records–I check now and then and my heart literally SINGS when I see he’s gotten in trouble again.
Heaven only knows what his living situation is–I cannot imagine any woman taking him in these days–no matter how handsome and charming he is. Alcoholics lose their sparkle quickly.

In other words (as I warned him MANY times–and as had other women he jacked around), he’s reaping what he’s sown and getting what he deserves.

The last thing I ever heard about the cheater was that his sugar mama setup went sour.

After they blew through her divorce settlement she got sick of him loafing around her house all day while she went to work to pay the bills and told him to get a job too. He didn’t get a job fast enough, so she kicked him out and he had to go live with his mom.

I don’t know what happened to him after that. I know he’s still alive because he attempted to contact me earlier this year.

Karma –

-Dickhead ex gets fired from his union job after 20 years.
-Judge orders him to continue to pay full child support even though he is on unemployment.
-DH gets fired from his next job after two months.
-DH lands a job at the first OW’s employer and then they both get fired after a few months.
-DH stops paying child support with 6 months left until he is completely finished. Texts me and asks me to cancel the contempt hearing that’s been set up. I don’t respond. He has to pull all the money together before hearing so he doesn’t go to jail.
-Present girlfriend has now become ex girlfriend and he needs a place to live. He will have a hard time finding a place because he has never had to live on his own.
-Treated his two kids like shit while co-parenting. They now have gone no contact with him.

I never expected that Karma would come around. He’s a Narc and he always seemed to step in shit yet still smell like a rose. So I am quite happy that in the end karma has been a bigger bitch than I ever needed to be. Everything works out in time.

Late post, but the timing is so perfect for this topic. We just heard the story from my husband’s family last night.

My husband’s cousin, let’s call him Rhys, has lived with his girlfriend for awhile. He found out a year or so ago that she was cheating on him with some guy from Texas that she met online. Rhys dumped her right away, but she begged so hard to reconcile that he bought it.

Turns out (surprise!) she kept up the other relationship and told Rhys a few days ago that she was moving out within 24 hours to join the other man in San Antonio. His whole family helped her move out, just to make things easier on Rhys, who was pretty broken up about the whole mess.

When she packed her car, a good bit of space was reserved for her marijuana – fine in Rhys’s state, illegal in Texas. Cops grabbed her just over the border for speeding and jailed her for intent to distribute.

She called Rhys, sobbing, and ordered him to pay her bail. When he refused she got nasty and he hung up. The OM called next (!!!) and told Rhys that he was “ruining her life” and being petty and vindictive, etc. (probably used smaller words). Rhys said “She’s your problem now, man,” and blocked them both, plus the jail number for good measure. Obviously she picked a real winner who can’t even post her bail, and they both have some brass gonads for thinking her ex would jump up like a puppy to do her bidding. She’s sitting in jail this second as far as we know!

I was going to use this challenge to update everyone on the Kunty Kibbler’s purported “sexuality journeys” podcast (never ended up happening, of course), but instead I decided to check out the status of the Great Fuckwit Bar Mitzvah Pilgrimage to Israel.

Background — last year KK threw a bit of a fit because I was using my court-mandated first choice of vacation weeks in 2019 with my girls, instead of allowing her and the Chlorine Special to take them on a trip celebrating CS’s son’s bar mitzvah — along with CS’s sons, his father, his ex, and his ex’s parents (she said I was being “bitter and selfish for denying this opportunity to our girls, neither of whom wanted to go)

This challenge gave me a reason to check their respective Instagram accounts —

If you look only at the Chlorine Special’s, you’d see pics of the sites and scenery interspersed with shots of his kids and of the entire group. To all appearances it is indeed a “family trip.”

Over at KK’s account, you’d think she and her new husband are alone on their honeymoon. Not one pic of his kids, or his family, or his ex, in site. Lots of sunsets and selfies — of him and her, of her and him, of her alone — and their AirBNB and the food they’re eating and the drinks they’re consuming. Even the new tattoos they got to commemorate the trip.

This is how I know all of that abuse I took for not “allowing” the girls to go was a steaming pile of bullshit. Oh, there might have been a fleeting thought about this trip being some sort of exotic exercise in family blending, but in actuality it appears to have turned into the perfect trip for her — CS’s ex-wife and her parents do all the heavy lifting with his boys, so KK can manipulate into carving out large swaths of 1:1 time

And where am I in all this, you might well ask? I’m with my girls (and my mother, a fairly late addition) on vacation in Europe, taking them to places THEY have always wanted to see (France, Germany, Belgium) without any forced interaction with step-brothers they do not seem to like, a step-father they appear to at best tolerate, and a group of strangers they do not know.

ROFL… Where to start… She left me for a white trash piece of s*** homewrecker. Finally married him after I would not take her back.. 4 years later he leaves her for another woman… Karma!…. She tries again to contact me.. says some things in passing that convinces me she has not changed a bit and is still a skank… She relocates and married another… Turns out it was a porn addict and they were on their way to a divorce when he contracted pancreatitis and passed away… Now she’s passing herself off as a poor widow and has a relationship of convenience at 61 years of age… Her best friend has four legs and a tail… Such is as it goes for the black hearted…..

Here’s a technique I learned (from a therapist) to STOP myself from thinking about my ex (it reminds me of Romeo’s line, “O teach me how I should forget to think!”).

It really worked for me when thoughts–either angry or sad or pained or nostalgic or whatever–slid into my head and made me miserable. It took a bit of mental discipline– but like a muscle, that gets stronger when you exercise it.

So when you find yourself brooding about He/She Who Shall Not Be Named– here’s the trick:

Start by picturing a STOP sign. Start at first by just seeing it.

Add details to the picture. Is it a sign in an imaginary location, or a real one? Is it new and shiny or battered and old? At what time of day? What’s on the street corner? Is is rainy or sunny out?

As you practice this you will become more adept at sliding the subject of your thoughts to all the details as you fully picture your sign in all its living 3-D splendor.

MY stop sign, it turns out, is kind of a hippie-cyclist-circus version of the Hollywood sign. It’s on top of the Col de Tourmalet (shout out to cycling geeks!), bright yellow, and ornamented with bulbs in all colors. I even have a soundtrack for it (and the lyrics go “STOP STOP STOP STOP”).

But my point is that it worked. I had to do this a lot at first, then less, and now hardly ever at all. Plus I still have my image in my head of my bright, blinking sign on top of a mountain. I happily hand it out to all my fellow chumps.

I don’t know if this will be as effective for the fresh agony of the newly chumped– I was a few years past The Final D-Day and sick of thinking about him, so perhaps “ready” for this exercise in a way I couldn’t have been in the early days.

As Tracy says, Better Days Ahead!

My era of great suffering started just before the Edwards scandal and I made a hobby of hating that awful woman. What REALLY got me at the time was a widely displayed photo of Edwards and Hunter where he is looking at her with the look of delight…you know that look? Im sure at the time, Edwards looked at Eliz with the same distain that my cheater looked at me…the “she deserves this” look.

In the years since it all ended (with my Cheaters sudden death …no I didnt kill him and please dont start another “I wish mine were dead” thread) I am so deeply surprised at how little I am bothered by the sex…I was absolutely faithful to him and he (from all I now know was a man-whore) betrayed me repeatedly, but Im most bothered by the fact that he chose to take delight in others and save the blame and distain for me.

In some ways, my cheater was a decent, respected person but his achilles heel was in how he treated me and the people who loved him most know that. His memory has significantly reduced esteem in the eyes of the people he most wanted to respect him. As a Catholic I believe in Purgatory and that is where I believe he is now and it is a very comforting thought as I trust that God is dealing with him with a perfect balance of justice and mercy.

I hope that Eliz Edwards is now in a really good place surrounded by the love she was denied in life.

From what I know, the 2 main OWs do not have partners and I hope they die alone pining away for him.

My life is great in many ways and Im really thankful for it.

I recently had my kitchen redone and I have the same granite and backsplash as that nasty woman but my backsplash has dark grout which looks better than hers. I don’t know how God deals with pathetic fucked up people like her, but I think that Hell is real and some folks send themselves there.