Secret Names of Cell Phone Mystery

Hey Chump Lady!

In my chump mind I have thought this could be a Friday challenge….

What was Other Person saved as under your spouse’s phone contacts?

Mine was ‘Home Office’ and I often handed his phone to him and left the room so he could have privacy!!! ????

neversawitcoming33

Well, I don’t know if we’ve ever played that cheater trope before, but let’s open the floor to cell phone secrecy. Or alternative names you’ve given you’ve given your ex on the phone?

His Schmoopie: “Home Office”

Your Cell Name for Him: “Do Not Answer This Call”

I’m sure you’ve got more creative ones.

I can’t play this one. It’s eons ago, but my cheating ex had NO contacts on his phone. And the ringer was always off. I stupidly assumed he didn’t know how cell phones worked. He had two engineering degrees.

Chumpy, chump, chump… Anywho, TGIF!

 

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ClearWaters
ClearWaters
4 years ago

Assistant.

And just before The End, sparkledick was always talking about “my assistant” with his upper class posh accent in our language…

I can see clearly now
I can see clearly now
4 years ago
Reply to  ClearWaters

My husbands affair partner was listed under cell for the first 2 cell phones he had. Her name began with C. I thought it was the cell phone companies number. She was also under hme for her home right below home for our home number. She was 25 under speed dial. In his last phone she was under C. I knew something was wrong but never checked his phone. Last time she came to our town, we are 6 hours away, he wouldn’t go to her fancy hotel room, paid for by her husband. I guess she got mad and texted him at night. I saw the text which began the journey towards being a detective. I hated it!

Astor Pride
Astor Pride
4 years ago
Reply to  ClearWaters

Mine for him is “Cheater Whoreface”. It gives me a chuckle every time he calls. ????

SheWon'tEvenNotice!
SheWon'tEvenNotice!
4 years ago
Reply to  ClearWaters

My name for my Fuck Wit was “Soon to Be Ex-Spouse” the moment I found out about his affair.

And I renamed it to “Ex-Spouse” as soon as the divorce was finalized.

Nothing more than that. Just some person I used to know.

So hurt
So hurt
4 years ago

My name for him is HIM
My ring tone is an obnoxious siren
The OW in his phone was his boss’s name
30 years of marriage

Magneto
Magneto
4 years ago

My cellphone ringer for him: Nowhere man. Paid $1 for the ringtone.

Formerchumpnowbride
Formerchumpnowbride
4 years ago
Reply to  Magneto

My cellphone tones for my ex over the years (we have a kid so have to keep in touch):

Looney Toons theme
Yip yip monsters from Sesame Street
Theme from various different horror films.

Right now it is the theme from the Exorcist because it amuses me. It also lets me know I’m about to be annoyed if he is bothering to phone me. I usually keep everything to text (backed up of course) so I always send him a confirmation of what we talked about on the phone text. He rarely calls anymore because that annoys him too. Heh.

SKYDixie
SKYDixie
4 years ago

Mine was the theme for Halloween until my child said it was creepy and asked who it was. Couldn’t tell her it was her Dad so I changed it. (sigh)

SuperDuperChump
SuperDuperChump
4 years ago
Reply to  Magneto

My ex-cheater is blocked along with her toxic family. I am not in to ringtones, but I do have just one. A few years ago, when I met my Lady Friend, “Wagon Wheel” by Darius Rucker was playing on the radio when I got back in my truck after having fixed her car. That is my ringtone when she calls.

Lori
Lori
4 years ago

A happy one! Nice

TwinsDad
TwinsDad
4 years ago
Reply to  Magneto

Nice!

SYPP
SYPP
4 years ago
Reply to  TwinsDad

He used the names of male coworkers for his mistresses.

Lindseyw
Lindseyw
4 years ago
Reply to  SYPP

Yes!!!!! Mine did too!! He was in the Army so the hoes’ names were like “sp garza”, which he knew that I knew was a male coworker. He would answer it as if it was a make on the other line and go into another room because… well I thought it was a male. NOPE!!

Freeasabird
Freeasabird
4 years ago
Reply to  SYPP

Yes me too! He saved her number under one of his old (male) colleagues names on Viber. I’d have never suspected, except her ugly mug appeared as the contact photo on his contacts. He still denies he was contacting her????…they really are morons.

LaterCaptain
LaterCaptain
4 years ago
Reply to  SYPP

He is listed in my phone as “Captain save a Ho”

Fire captain who cheated with volunteer he “rescued” from an abusive relationship

TwinsDad
TwinsDad
4 years ago

I never knew her contact name for the AP back then. She is now “Mrs. _____” (his last name-she married him shortly after our divorce was final) on my phone. Also, before I blocked her and switched to a coparenting app, the ringtone I had set for her was kind of a spooky, Halloween sound effect. Now whenever I hear that ringtone on someone else’s phone I cringe – I blocked her because she was so abusive. Anyone else have a good ringtone for their ex?

Cam
Cam
4 years ago
Reply to  TwinsDad

Years before my dad finally cut off his psychopath sister, his ringtone for her was the theme song for the Wicked Witch of the West.

Walkingtowardsfreedom
Walkingtowardsfreedom
4 years ago
Reply to  TwinsDad

Yes. He’s in there as Womanizer and Britney Spears song plays!!

Beau
Beau
4 years ago
Reply to  TwinsDad

I used the claxon horn alarm sound and titled her phone number as “The Witch”. Later, I just blocked her and deleted all.

Amazon Chump
Amazon Chump
4 years ago
Reply to  TwinsDad

The theme from Jaws when the shark is eminent. Another good is “Danger Will Robinson! Danger!”

Hurt1
Hurt1
4 years ago
Reply to  Amazon Chump

Flashback laugh! Ex used to shout “Danger Will Robinson” whenever he farted. It disgusted me but it would make a great ringtone – never had the chance as I went no contact almost immediately.

Involuntary Georgian
Involuntary Georgian
4 years ago
Reply to  Amazon Chump

I have XW’s picture set to the robot that says “Danger Will Robinson”. It’s dated enough that it reminds me, but the kids don’t pick up on it.

LisaLisa
LisaLisa
4 years ago
Reply to  TwinsDad

My ex was also an alcoholic. One of the coping mechanisms I used when he was in a rage yelling nonsense at me was to think of his verbal spewage as a duck quacking. Helped me not react. Quack, quack, quack. Lol. So that’s my ringtone for him–duck quacking=ignore.

GermanChump
GermanChump
4 years ago
Reply to  LisaLisa

Thank you, Lisa. I will try that for my ex-cheater/alcoholic with whom I have a small child. What sound for a parallel parenting duck?

Learning
Learning
4 years ago
Reply to  LisaLisa

Hilarious

ClearWaters
ClearWaters
4 years ago
Reply to  TwinsDad

I am 100% no contact, if a son had a serious accident I would have to call his work and only on a weekday. So don’t need a special ringtone. But if I did, it would be the shower theme from Psycho.

fargles
fargles
4 years ago
Reply to  ClearWaters

no contact with kids.. Impressive.

Martha
Martha
4 years ago
Reply to  ClearWaters

Fun Fact: XH got picked out a crowd to play Norman Bates at Universal Studios Florida. He had to act out the shower scene on stage. The girl that picked him to be Norman Bates must have had psychic abilities to pick out the disordered. lol. 🙂

YouCantPolishATurd
YouCantPolishATurd
4 years ago
Reply to  ClearWaters

????

UXworld
UXworld
4 years ago
Reply to  ClearWaters

🙂

OutWest
OutWest
4 years ago

My ex business name starts with the letter F. She was under FF. The secret email was Franz Friebach…. his phone was on lockdown. Good thing I’m ‘pretty bright’. My kids tell me he still gets a lot of calls from F. Also he put a security glass on his phone after the divorce. My daughter thought it was weird. You know, all cloak and dagger shit. 5 years out.

diagonal
diagonal
4 years ago
Reply to  OutWest

How funny! Mine is listed as FF also. But it stands for F*ck Face.

Geode
Geode
4 years ago
Reply to  diagonal

????????????????
Mine is FT = F*cktard

Nancy
Nancy
4 years ago

My dad is the cheater and is always no where to be found. He is such a liar. I have him listed as “the black hole” with the accompanying emoji ????

Elderly Chump
Elderly Chump
4 years ago
Reply to  Nancy

Nancy,

Welcome.
I love what you wrote.
It sounds like something my daughter would write if she read input here. She saw the truth long before I did.
Thanks for sharing

SweetPotatoFlakes
SweetPotatoFlakes
4 years ago

With my ex-wife it was the creative ways she would hid the channels of communication on her phone.

There were game apps that had in game chat. Various memberships to web forums that allowed private messages. She knew I was more tech savvy than her. Text, email, and social media were too risky with me. However, she could figure it out when motivated.

Her browsing history would keep being cleared, but only for the last hour. I figured out it would always default to the last setting selected, even if it was cancelled. I’d set it to delete everything and click cancel. A few days later it’d be back to one hour.

He phone activity history was what busted her once. One sided sound clips of her speech-to-text. I went through it all and recorded it.

She begged me to delete it during our “reconciliation”. She cleared it from her history. She was so concerned I was “torturing myself” by keeping it.

Yeah, right. Her knowing I still have that recording is the only reason the divorce proceedings went as smoothly as they did.

Involuntary Georgian
Involuntary Georgian
4 years ago

XW’s affair partner was the head of IT for her experiment. They installed a dedicated point-to-point-encrypted messaging app; when I noticed it, she said it was to protect sensitive experimental data. Because, you know, gravitational-wave data has such high black-market resale value that hackers are always after it…

SheChump
SheChump
4 years ago

Involuntary Georgian – I had similar shenanigans happen with the ‘work’ cell phone and it’s password protected, you know, because it’s ‘special’ systems’, like Bloomberg was installed. (yawn) You know! Funny, as I was his personal assistant for work and had full access to the phone as he needed me to text, and even talk to, customers while on the road together. Suddenly, funny how the phone lock went into place on a dark and rainy night…and was laid off my job. (thankfully!)

Newlady15
Newlady15
4 years ago

Funny how they use that script sweetpotatoflakes. Mine wanted me to destroy the notes I started making of his massive gaslighting campaign. No, no I don’t think so. He was a master of blaming my trauma induced memory for not remembering things “right”. My notes showed him to be a liar many many times and I only kept notes for the last year, imagine if I had them for the whole 36 years?!!!

Attie
Attie
4 years ago
Reply to  Newlady15

Newlady, I also kept notes of my ex’ behaviour but just for a period of 6 months. IT WAS APPALLING READING. I’m talking violence, promising to pick the kids up and going to the bar instead, not showing up at the airport to pick a neighbour up when he had offered, his dickhead behaviour, drunken car crashes, calling the cops on him etc. I stopped after 6 months because it was always going to be just more of the same (like 15 years worth), but I thought it might come in handy in the event of a divorce. I didn’t need it in the end but I did send him an email copy of the document in a fit of pique once. No comment back though!

ChumpedButHappierNow
ChumpedButHappierNow
4 years ago

I don’t know what the OW was is the EX’s phone, but in mine, the EX is LyinCheater because that is what he does and just in case I need a reminder……

Happily Free
Happily Free
4 years ago

I never knew either. No one touched his phones. Yes plural- he kept a work phone on him in a job that did not need after work contact. Should’ve been my first clue.

Right now, I share a contact list with my child, and X’s name is affectionate. I’ll leave it as long as necessary because my child’s feeling right now are more important than mine, but prior to that it was just his name. Seeing his name makes me cringe. Hearing his voice is nauseating.

So what a great idea! Maybe I’ll smirk if I can one day change it to Lying Cheater, Waste and Disposal, Blocked, Narc, or something much more fitting.

Twiceachump
Twiceachump
4 years ago
Reply to  Happily Free

I have Dr Cheaterpants listed under my contacts as ‘kids father’. That’s all he is to me now 3 years out. And he’s not even good at that!

RaffNoMore
RaffNoMore
4 years ago
Reply to  Happily Free

I have mine as Kid’s father since they are young. Once they are older I’ll change it to Fuckwit or Asshat or NSFW for narcissistic sociopath fuck wit or maybe GFYAH for go fuck your self ass hat or maybe.. even after 2 custody trials you still lost you dumb shit or don’t lie to the judge dumbass. The choices are endless!

Stephanie
Stephanie
4 years ago
Reply to  RaffNoMore

My kids sortof read so his name is Voldemort on my phone.

Wisernow
Wisernow
4 years ago

As far as I know the OW was only listed under her real name. She didn’t need to call him, she worked with him 8 hours everyday. As for him he is now listed in my contacts as Rat Bastard. Doesn’t matter because if he calls or texts me I’ve got him blocked anyway.

Rebecca
Rebecca
4 years ago
Reply to  Wisernow

Same here.
They “worked” together late nights and they were always on the phone about “work” – texts, emails and calls.

I knew her well and had sat in in many boring calls and meetings all about work. So why would I even suspect when the work changed to an affair.

Blocked her (we were friends and planning his birthday party when DDay happened) immediately.

Finally blocked his calls and texts recently. Older kids so no software needed. Have to keep my email address open to him for another 7 years according to decree but he never contacts me.

NeverAgain
NeverAgain
4 years ago

My ringtone for him is “Tubthumping” by Chumbawumba. “I get knocked down/but I get up again/you’re never gonna keep me down!” Because no matter all the shit he put me through (and there was a LOT), I’m better off without him.

Poconochump
Poconochump
4 years ago
Reply to  NeverAgain

????????

SuperDuperChump
SuperDuperChump
4 years ago
Reply to  NeverAgain

That is AWESOME!!!

Unfortunately……now that song is on auto-loop in my brain.

Christy
Christy
4 years ago

The OW on my soon to be Ex’s phone was ‘Help Line A’. Seriously. My name for him on mine is nowABL. (Always Be Lyin’)…????. I change it occasionally when the mood strikes me.

Alexandra West
Alexandra West
4 years ago
Reply to  Christy

“NatWest Customer Services”
(UK bank)

I mean, really.

UXworld
UXworld
4 years ago

KK never bothered with screen names, which made it very easy for me to structure a cohesive narrative as to just how pathetically shitty she was.

But I’ll get my snark on and come up with ones she might have used:

OP: the one who apparently started it all, the engineer in the (supposedly) open marriage who had a shared taste in music and opened her mind up to the ‘possibilities of ethical non-monogamy’
Screen Name: Mr. Fix-It

OP: the one who played the bass, lived with his bisexual girlfriend and introduced KK to the pleasures of BDSM
Screen Name: Dom

OP: the welder with whom she had unprotected sex in a hotel bathroom the first time they met, and who she brought into our home and bed twice before I caught them
Screen Name: Sparky

OP: the novelist and writing instructor who she met and fucked less than 10 days after the official split, who enjoys being pegged with the vibrating purple dildo, and to whom she is now married
Screen Name: Peggy

Lisa2.0
Lisa2.0
4 years ago

SIADB. (Steve is a douche bag)

One time a woman in front of me received a call, her ring tone was a blaring alarm that then said “ warning! Bull shit alert!” She turned around and apologized and said it was her ring tone for her ex. So funny!

BowTie
BowTie
4 years ago
Reply to  Lisa2.0

Love that!

Unexpectedchumpiness
Unexpectedchumpiness
4 years ago

My cheating ex’s name in my phone is meh meh meh.

Strugglingnomore
Strugglingnomore
4 years ago

My ex was “Fucking Moron” in my contacts list for a long time. I have an iphone and I use the sexy male version of Siri. One time when I was driving, I said “hey Siri, text Fucking Moron”. And in his very Australian accent, Siri said “What do you want to say to Fucking Moron?” I was laughing so hard I couldn’t speak

Martha
Martha
4 years ago

LOL!! 🙂

susan devlin
susan devlin
4 years ago

He would take his phone everywhere, even to the toilet, or the bath. no name on phone, but she called him, 28 times on Christmas day once, he asked me if he could go out (asking my permission probably).
She probably was all excited.

Lucky
Lucky
4 years ago
Reply to  susan devlin

Mine also sat on the toilet texting Miss Piggy. Near the end he started bringing his laptop with him as well.

He had been known to spend as long as 3 hours in there ! Family noticed, kids noticed, guests noticed. It became a bit of a joke until he raged at us ( but never stopped ).

I never once got hands on his phone. He slept with it in a death grip held tight to his chest and never set it down.

This is the Minister who ( fully dressed for service ) jumped up and down in the parking lot of the church yelling “ I was supposed to be a firefighter “ while clenching his fists. ….

So, ring tone is the sound of fire trucks to remind me that he is one hot mess!!!

Mustard Seed
Mustard Seed
4 years ago
Reply to  Lucky

Oh my goodness, I hope he is no longer a minister. Firefighter indeed. What a complete joke.

Lucky
Lucky
4 years ago
Reply to  Mustard Seed

Still collecting the God points I am afraid…better yet, long time Schmoops is also ordained.

They married this year. Not my problem any more….

Joe
Joe
4 years ago

Cheater had sparkle dick listed as “Z” in her contacts and on snapcheat so he would be at the bottom of the list.

Doingme
Doingme
4 years ago
Reply to  Joe

The Limited had an A as his first number on his phone. I’m pretty sure it was reserved for his AP’s. I was booted from his phone plan because I talked too much with my good friend. He was furious when I talked to her and laughed.

As he graduated to dating multiple women he hid their phone numbers in his email account. When he was screwing Nanthony he was also seeing two others.

He used his business account and added a second number which came up as Anonymous; it rang frequently.

Here’s the thing, the OW are aware of the duplicity and knowingly engage with a low life cheater. What they once found exciting will bite them down the road. They signed up for it and look at the prize they found.

Jenal30
Jenal30
4 years ago

My ex is listed as Mr. Fake & Take. His phone was glued to his hand so I never knew OW contact name but call/text logs are such marvelous things.

Thirtythreeyearsachump
Thirtythreeyearsachump
4 years ago

Oh Chump Lady, the cell phone memories, they pain me. We purchased new phones and somehow his contacts were added to mine, and mine to his. He stood over me and demanded I delete those contacts “Right now!” I pretended to do so. In the process I discovered he had listed a thirty two year old, the niece of a high school friend under the name, Mama. When his financial affidavit arrived I discovered he is paying for Life Insurance to Insure Child Support payments. Our children are adults, there will be no child support payments. There is no child’s name listed in the section for Children Not of This Marriage. I suppose the hood rat is pregnant, hence the cell phone listing under Mama. I will meet with my lawyer and hopefully get answers. I plan to inform my adult sons if there is an adultery baby. I will also tell them he gave me a STI. They need to know he is without honor.

The cellphone memories are hurtful. He used to have the phone glued to his hand. He once stood outside in twenty degree weather to talk on the phone. He would text the entire time we were trying to have a dinner date. He wouldn’t let me use his phone ever. He got extremely defensive if I touched his phone. His behavior around the phone was enough to convince me he was cheating, again.

I changed my phone service. I have a new number, a number I did not share with him. I have a lawyer he can talk too. I don’t ever want to talk to him again.

karenb6702
karenb6702
4 years ago

33 I found out yesterday that the whore is 3.5 months pregnant and they are engaged .

He’s still married to me !!! She got pregnant less than 15 weeks after he left me . Now that was a kick in the teeth
❤️

neversawitcoming33
neversawitcoming33
4 years ago
Reply to  karenb6702

Oh. My. Gosh. PREGNANT?!?!?! I am still married too. And I am 2 years into this shit show. Meanwhile, my HUSBAND has been all over the country with OW and her small children. (Ours are in college). Why do they feel they can do this??? And isn’t there ANYTHING that can stop them???? It seems like there should be a whole separate police department for these things. I heard mine were shopping for a new home in a price range WAAAAYY more than our home is. It makes me sick and I am READY for the karma bus!!! I can’t imagine dealing with a pregnancy……I’m so sorry. 🙁

Thirtythreeyearsachump
Thirtythreeyearsachump
4 years ago
Reply to  karenb6702

Karenb6702, I am so very sorry. It is a kick in the teeth, isn’t it? Until it happens you can not fathom the pain.

I love babies. I always have loved babies. I wanted more babies. He was adamant that there would be no more babies. Fuck that fucking fucker. I truly hate him.

How can you be engaged when you are married? How can you date when you are married? How can you have a baby with a whore? Poor little baby will have a whore for a mama. How can you be an unrepentant asshole? Chump Lady says that trying to “untangle the skein of fuckery” is a hopeless task. So I’m trying to reframe my pain into positive action. Any ideas for positive action in the face of this betrayal? How are you handling this continuing devastation? Today I am struggling.

repulsedandbreathless
repulsedandbreathless
4 years ago

Dear Karen ,so sorry for your anguish , please know that he is sick ,disordered , and everything the others have said here is true , she will tire of his old ass , and he will soon no longer see all that sparkle in her .there is a somatic therapy called “brain spotting” , it’s by a doc called Dr. Brand ,he is on u-tube , it’s easy to do .i have done it and it works really well . i have no info on his phone ,because i was never allowed to see it .on the brain spotting you “imagine a scene ” and of course it can be any scene you want ,as sweet or violent as you want .it works ,give it a try .good luck honey . you will get your justice .

Amazon Chump
Amazon Chump
4 years ago

I’m so sorry for you! I cannot fathom the pain. I was in my 50s (so was the skank), so at least I didn’t have that pain to endure. It’s not the baby’s fault, it’s the fucked up biological father and biological mother. And someday, unless that baby gets psychological counseling, it’s going to be messed up trying to get love from narcissistic sociopath parents. How sad all around. I pray that you see that you’re much better off now that you are not having that fuckwit to deal with. Take it one day at a time. Remain No Contact. Put notes of affirmation on your bathroom window. Smile. Recognize your value (and that it doesn’t depend on a fuckwit to recognize it.) And thank the Good Lord that you don’t have to deal with a fuckwit today. Each day it gets better. Hugs!

Thirtythreeyearsachump
Thirtythreeyearsachump
4 years ago
Reply to  Amazon Chump

Amazon Chump, everyday does get better. I am overwhelmingly grateful that I do not have contact with that stupid whore fucker. He is an old, sick, disabled vet who should have known better than to rawdog a hood rat. I’m just enraged at his Stupidity.

Trying very hard to put the focus back on me. I think it is time to have a funeral like Elderly Chump. I need to lay this fucker to rest. Time to “MENTALLY divorce” him like Lovedajackass. Time to purge this fuckery from my mind.

I can not wait to be divorced. I will smile because he cannot prevent this divorce. He cannot control that outcome. I will be divorced. I will receive spousal maintenance. I will receive my personal belongings. I will live a better life.

Thank you Amazon.

karenb6702
karenb6702
4 years ago

The thing that’s killing me is he swore he NEVER wanted children as in EVER . He said he’d leave me ( well he did but I wasn’t pregnant ) if I ever even had a slip with my birth control .

Yet here he is going to be a dad his wife to be posting it all over the Internet for anyone in the world to type her name in and see it .

Me his actual legal wife you know little old me with the wedding certificate well no one gives a fuck .

Everyone is ooohhh congratulations this is amazing news well done well done . We have saved the date can’t wait .
No one even bats an eye that she’s engaged and having a baby with my husband !!
It’s the most surreal thing ever and I’m seeing it all in front of me

Freer Every Day!
Freer Every Day!
4 years ago
Reply to  karenb6702

Someone said to me at the time his affair became known “We’ve never seen Fuckwit so happy. he’s completely consumed with this woman”. she still has no idea how close she came to being knocked on her rather expansive backside.

I just can’t believe the callousness of people to the wife of 25 years.

I’m 5 years out and so very grateful to be away from the garbage I lived for half my life. She deserves him. They all do.

NotThisGirl
NotThisGirl
4 years ago
Reply to  karenb6702

Oh Karen! I’m so sorry! If it helps any I know how it feels to have your life feel surreal and like a complete nightmare. You’re not alone. My exhusband got the OW pregnant with twins. The OW found out she was pregnant after he broke up with her (she probably felt him becoming disinterested and got pregnant on purpose). Anywhoo he had someone else waiting in the wings and married that woman instead. Oh.. he too didn’t want kids while we were married either.

Here is the good news! It gets better. I have a beautiful life now that doesn’t revolve around a lying, psychopath cheater!! My number one word of advice is stop all social media or however you are seeing the OW and her pregnancy news. That is pure torture for your sweet soul!You deserve better!

kiwichump
kiwichump
4 years ago
Reply to  karenb6702

I’m so sorry, Karen. What he did to you is to unspeakably cruel. Block them all, they are as had as he is.

Jenal30
Jenal30
4 years ago
Reply to  karenb6702

Shit is going to get real for both Fuckwits once the baby is born and the novelty wears off. Don’t think he will be different or better with her. He is the same turd who will eventually lie and cheat on her too and since she’s younger, she may very well get tired of his old ass real quick. Be glad you didn’t breed with him – he did you a favor. He is NOT the stand-up kind of man you would want to be the father of your children anyway. I know it’s painful but in time, you will be rocking that single life and he will be tied down and living miserably ever after. Trust that they suck.

Thirtythreeyearsachump
Thirtythreeyearsachump
4 years ago
Reply to  karenb6702

Karenb6702, it is just astounding isn’t it? They have no shame. They aren’t capable of shame. Block all forms of social media. They do not deserve a moments consideration. That everyone is ignoring the fact he is a married man demonstrates his friends are shit and not your friends.

You deserve so much better than this.

karenb6702
karenb6702
4 years ago

I’m struggling to be honest

I was 26 when I met him he told me he NEVER wanted children and if I got pregnant he would leave me as he hates kids . I adored him so I thought well you can’t miss what you don’t have and carried on with life .
I’m now 45 so have no chance of having a child and here is him having a baby that he swore he would NEVER have .
My in laws are beyond happy as he is the only boy so the name will carry on .

Whore had it all over Facebook / Pinterest / instagram ( I’ve not looked but my friend told me and sent me their engagement photo )
Her ring is nice way way better than he got me .
The fact he’s still married you know to me well that’s inconsequential .
I’ve said from the start this would happen and everyone said no no it won’t last well now they are getting married and having a baby .

Much love to you 33 I hope you get through this as well and if you need anything I’m on the Reddit forum ( same user name ) just PM me ❤️❤️

Jasmine
Jasmine
4 years ago
Reply to  karenb6702

Karen6702 ….i m so sorry ….that is a huge betrayal at all levels ….i feel for you xxx

IDeserveBetter
IDeserveBetter
4 years ago
Reply to  Jasmine

I toyed with using the names he used on the dating apps. Lovebringer69 and MrBarista69. I eventually settled for making his name all lower case. It is just a show that he doesn’t even deserve a capital for his name.

NotbLUEinTC
NotbLUEinTC
4 years ago
Reply to  karenb6702

33 and KarenB–

I’m truly sorry for you both. I had no idea the depths of sadness infidelity can inflict. This is yet another layer and I have no words–just sending you warm and positive thoughts.

“know you will get through this with grace and courage.”–Thirtythreeyearsachump

This makes me think of the Cowardly Lion. As everything has fallen away, I’m amazed at these cold-blooded cowards, Switzerland friends included. But you’re right, us Chumps are the courageous ones, just as the Cowardly Lion found out–and we have had the courage all along.

Periwinkle
Periwinkle
4 years ago
Reply to  karenb6702

Karen,
I have this belief at the back of my mind that I was chosen also for my age (34), then strung along for several years, then marriage. And then he was a withholder. He abandoned me at age 49 for somebody younger.
I am just glad that there were no children to the marriage because it would not have been good for a child. Yet the fact remains that I could maybe have met someone else back then…

Thirtythreeyearsachump
Thirtythreeyearsachump
4 years ago
Reply to  karenb6702

Thank You Karen. I’m having difficulties entering the reddit forum. I appreciate your response. I’m sorry you have been dealt this shit hand. I know you will get through this with grace and courage.

Periwinkle
Periwinkle
4 years ago

They let us (my mother, and us 2 girls) go visit the OW at the hospital when she had her child from my father. We did not know. Only many years later we got to now.
One of the innumerable highs they had behind our backs. They thrive on hurting and humiliating.
I ended up married to a withholder/vulnerable/mocking narcissist (did not know about this stuff back then).

Poconochump
Poconochump
4 years ago

Hope his dick turns into a shriveled prune. Good for u!! Ur mighty!

Sweetener
Sweetener
4 years ago

Mercy! That is unbelievably awful but I applaud your courage.
Sending you warmth and well wishes.

engineerdad
engineerdad
4 years ago

the AP’s name was her best friends name with an extra a on the end

in my phone she is not listed as a contact, i just see the number, i’m also an engineer but i do have other contacts in my phone

Deborah
Deborah
4 years ago

Contact listing for ex is Pinnochio, photo is a dickhead. I crack myself up!!!
Happy Friday!

Phoenix
Phoenix
4 years ago

S. He saved her as S. But with over 300 contacts I didn’t even notice until I had to marriage police and started connecting the dots.

JC
JC
4 years ago

Ah, the cell phone games!!!

The best was her fake messages that she “planted” on her phone during my brief snooping period. They were to her OM, and to a friend, saying how remorseful she was and how she had reformed.

Her intent was for me to see just THOSE messages and believe she’s changed. Manipulating your husband = MORE CAKE. Yummy!!!!

TheBestMe
TheBestMe
4 years ago
Reply to  JC

Mine did that with his OW, they sent email they knew I would find, how they did not sleep together and that she was glad he was going to start working on his marriage and she was going to work on her relationship with her live in boyfriend. The first thing I did was print it out and ask him if he was on the phone with her when she typed it, he admitted yes he was…. asshat. He used male co workers name for his contact in his phone for OW. When I found the one admitting to sex with “Steve” I handed him divorce papers right then (I had filed months before “in case”. I also was furious that he put us in a bad position with his job if Steve ever seen the implication that they were having sex on his phone…. I am sure something would have hit the fan.

The kicker is that right after the divorce he married a second OW I was unaware of ( I wonder if first Ow knew?) and she married her “boyfriend” and moved to my neighborhood. They are both moving on and it took me 4 years to prop my Sons up and just get to survival mode. Life is a bitch sometimes. LOL

WayPastThatNow
WayPastThatNow
4 years ago

Ex hid his message app under Finance, I found it anyway. AP called herself Curious George. I call her Chickaboob.

WayPastThatNow
WayPastThatNow
4 years ago
Reply to  WayPastThatNow

And I call him He Who Shall Not Be Named

ChumpedToTheMax
ChumpedToTheMax
4 years ago

He’s blocked, so I have nothing for him, before I blocked him I used a monkey for his image.

He wan’t very creative with his phone. I found out about the GF when I was using his phone and her named popped up as she was calling him. That was easy.

One thing he did do is set up a secret facebook account, it was a stupid name but only his GF and one other enabler was friends with “Nike S____” His name is Mike, so lame.

Happy
Happy
4 years ago

My ex wore a toupee. So his pic in my contacts is a pig with a wig. AKA pig wig

Kim
Kim
4 years ago
Reply to  Happy

Mine wore one too! A really bad, cheap one.

I call him “shitty toupee guy”. That’s how my friends know him too. Dude, nobody thinks you have a ton of jet black weird looking hair that doesn’t blend well in your mid 60’s.

Lol. I know for a fact his coworkers make fun of him because one of his coworkers who remained my friend after she found out what a piece of shit he was told me.

Bluebell
Bluebell
4 years ago

He had all his email to her set to go to a special folder in his gmail account. I can’t remember what it was called, but he was on a business trip and told me he’d be late back because he was taking the train out to have lunch with her (from Manhattan to Long Island!) and that’s when alarm bells went off in my head. They became a klaxon when I went into his email and could not find a SINGLE EMAIL between them. Then I found the secret folder.

Later, all kinds of pieces fell into place, like how once we were in the car and I picked up his phone to check the maps app and he jumped down my throat and gave me a twenty minute lecture about violating the privacy of his business clients and how dare I look at his phone. It wasn’t his clients. It was her.

angela
angela
4 years ago

mine had two sim cards- two what’s app accounts to hide the other people. One was listed in his phone as a nonsense name – I was told it was real estate agent. Mobile phone was the death of us – besides his complete lack of integrity. Cheating central. Once found out he left in 36 hours after a 30 year marriage and ran back to his native Argentina. 8 months on, no contact rules, and I just found out his phone was stolen yesterday. Such good karma. His most important possession: gone.

cuzchump
cuzchump
4 years ago

My Ex used Kevin1 for Skankella. The ironic part is we used to have window phones. When I got a new one I signed into my email address and downloaded my contacts. The weird part is that it downloaded his contacts instead. I asked him who Kevin1 was. He said it was our friend Kevin’s old gophone number. I believed him because Kevin had several gophones. I actually kept the number on my contacts up until I found out about Skankella. To think I could have found out about it earlier if I just would have called or text that number. When I found out that it was her number(he still denied it). I texted the real Kevin the number and asked him if it was ever his number. And of course it was not. My Ex was Furious that I contacted Kevin. He said that I had no right bringing him into our problems.

Poconochump
Poconochump
4 years ago
Reply to  cuzchump

Hmm. Nope he brought Kevin into it. Stupid cheater. Glad u caught him!! ????????

Brand New Bag
Brand New Bag
4 years ago
Reply to  cuzchump

Ha – you didn’t involve Kevin. He did by using Kevin’s name! And come to think of it, he created the problems! What a dick.

So Done
So Done
4 years ago

My Ex is listed in my contacts as Pinocchio. His ringtone is “If You’re Lips Are Movin’.”

2timeschump1timecaller
2timeschump1timecaller
4 years ago

he just had her in his phone as her name, nothing too interesting.

My name for him now on my phone is “Is it essential”. In the beginning it just helped remind me that i don’t need to respond or reach out to him. Now it’s just stuck

Chumped3years
Chumped3years
4 years ago

Mine listed her as her place of work. After I discovered they were texting and talking all day I confronted him. He stopped using that phone and bought a secret phone. Hides it everywhere including his sock while walking and his shoes in the closet. The idiot thinks I don’t know about this phone, but he talks to text, so easy to record.

Rocketed
Rocketed
4 years ago

My stbx name in my phone is Toby. That’s the name of the devil. Have any of you see Mr. Bean’s standup show? He goes out and says “as you can tell I’m the devil, or you can call me Toby.”

His dumb schmoopie is in my phone as schmoopie of Toby. You may wonder why I have schmoopie in my phone but I did it because I was snooping once, adding Snapchat and some other apps and seeing if she and him are in there when pulled in from my contacts. I’m not at meh yet

Another interesting item: he had a recurring item in his calendar every Friday at lunch time called – Justin Fabulous. WTF? I remember it going off sometimes and he gaslit me saying I don’t know what that is, who it is, it just comes up on Friday. I don’t know why it’s there. Yeahhhh I’m thinking it’s schmoopie’s standing Friday lunch date. He’s at schmoopie’s every Friday now. How do I know? Why do I care? Did I mention I’m not at meh?

Amazon Chump
Amazon Chump
4 years ago
Reply to  Rocketed

You’ll get there. Meh took 5 years for me to reach, but most assuredly, I’m happily at meh. The day will come when you’ll laugh at his stupidity instead of hurt. Have confidence that the day will come. And you will truly be able to say, “He’s not my problem anymore! YES!!”

Adelante
Adelante
4 years ago

I have my ex listed as “Bad Penny,” because whatever move I made–divorce, retirement (we taught in the same department in the same small university)–whenever I thought I was free of him, he’d turn up (like a bad penny). For short, I thought of him as “BP,” which also worked for “Bra and Panties,” because he had to dress up in them (and change them out for others) when we had sex.

My divorce will have been final one year on November 9, and I am beginning to feel the “meh.”

Brand New Bag
Brand New Bag
4 years ago

Ringtone for Dickhead: Lips Are Movin’ (But You Lie, Lie, Lie)

After I realized he was cheating (but he didn’t yet know that I knew), I saw that he had renamed me quite some time ago “DW” – Da Wife”????. Since he didn’t know I knew what he was up to, I pretended I was sad about it and made him change it to “My Love”. So every time I called or texted him, I showed up as “My Love” – just to fuck with his head and piss off OW if she saw his phone.

Poconochump
Poconochump
4 years ago
Reply to  Brand New Bag

Love it. Such good reads.

Amazon Chump
Amazon Chump
4 years ago
Reply to  Brand New Bag

Ha!! Good for you!

Attie
Attie
4 years ago

My ex didn’t need to be secretive with her number because they always met up at the whore bar (where he bought rounds and rounds of drinks out of our checking account). In retrospect I should have changed his contact name in my phone to “I’m just going out to get smokes”, or “I’m stopping at the bar for a QUICK drink”, both of which meant he would stagger home completely trashed about 12 hours later and looking for a fight!

Bluedog65
Bluedog65
4 years ago

No AP. name per say.

I was such a 27 yr trusting chump, you know, supporting and protecting my family, that I wouldn’t have caught it anyway.

My new contact name for X of 8 weeks?

NO CHANGE!

Badmovie19
Badmovie19
4 years ago
Reply to  Bluedog65

My wasband was constantly on his work phone and sometimes coworkers called his personal cell. I remember seeing the howorker’s name pop up on his phone but figured she was just calling about work. Later once he discarded me it was pretty easy to look at his FB friends and fill in the blanks when I saw her name. Yep, this one married, has 3 kids, works at different location than him….,I filed for divorce 4 days after discovery. Funny she hasn’t yet filed for divorce. I hope his ass ends up alone. He’s probably already looking for new narc supply.

Trudy
Trudy
4 years ago

Oh my ex thought he was so clever. The lies he would make up. But he couldn’t figure out how I knew who the OW was. He thought someone in his office had the nerve to squeal on him. But no, they never did. All his cheater club friends protected him as well. But in his phone, all his work people were listed by last name, including women. Except her. Nope. She was Leslie. When she transferred to his office, she was just getting through a rough divorce and her ex was difficult because he was angry about her cheating. My ex wasn’t the first married guy she screwed around with. Her kids all have different fathers. And it turns out my ex knew her in High school. All things he never mentioned. It still bugs him I found out. But it was he who revealed it. He ain’t so smart.

Amazon Chump
Amazon Chump
4 years ago
Reply to  Trudy

The dick got so upset with me once when I said, “You know , you’re not as smart as you think you are.” They really aren’t all that smart.

Carrie
Carrie
4 years ago

My ex hubs ringtone is Problem by Ariana Grande. I don’t know if he had phony names for the other women. He conducted most of his chats through Words with Friends and the Facebook messenger app. He hooked up with the women after meeting them on Facebook

Dixie Chump
Dixie Chump
4 years ago

BAM (Brokeass Mountain … his contact name in my phone) had many carefully labeled contacts in his phone, all with “Tennis” added. As if he wouldn’t quite remember how he knew this person unless he reminded himself. But funny thing, the guys he played tennis with didn’t have the label by their name, whereas the ones with “Tennis” all had short, sort of masculine sounding names but turned out to be women. Like “Mic Tennis” … was Michelle. Do you think that fooled the marriage police? Um, nope.

EMILY CARAVAN
EMILY CARAVAN
4 years ago
Reply to  Dixie Chump

BWAHAHAHAHAHA Brokeass Mountain I think you win the Internet today!

Amazon Chump
Amazon Chump
4 years ago

Your Cell Name for Him: “Lying Cheater”. And for his picture, the picture from “The picture of Dorian Gray”.

via GIPHY

Janet
Janet
4 years ago

My ex’s name begins w/ L- I changed it in my phone to lying cheating Shithead & completely forgot about it – we are 98% no contact unless there is an issue with the adult kids or if my alimony is late.imagine my surprise one day when a text out of nowhere – showed up as lying cheating Shithead – I laughed so loud – I had to explain to my coworkers what I was laughing about

Amazon Chump
Amazon Chump
4 years ago
Reply to  Janet

I’m changing mine right now to “Lying Cheating Dick!” Thanks!!

Gonegirl
Gonegirl
4 years ago

As far as GrannyHo, the Wifetress, I don’t think he had her listed in his phone other than her name. He worked with her and her calling I thought was no biggie. Apparently it was.

Anyway, for him he is simply “Donor” in the phone. That is how I view him now and the song is “The Asshole Song” by Jimmy Buffett. He didn’t release that song, but you can find it on Youtube.

Happy Friday y’all!!

neverachumpagain
neverachumpagain
4 years ago
Reply to  Gonegirl

“I drive really slow, in the ultra fast lane” LOLOLOL I love this song, and Denis Leary. I was 18 when this came out, and just starting to drive on the highway, so I would sing this song when someone was driving below the speed limit in the left lane for no reason. I still do !

1993. I still can’t believe that was 26 years ago.

chump-pin
chump-pin
4 years ago
Reply to  Gonegirl

Same. Her first AP was a co-worker, so it came up as his actual name. I didn’t think much about it until he texted that he wanted to take her from the back.

Her second was a methhead from the rehab I paid for, and she put him in as the name of the rehab clinic.

But, of course she didn’t cheat with the second one after discovery because I had said I wanted a divorce (I was still reeling from the first D-Day only a month before). Right…then why the fake name, coming back home to live with me again, and saying she wanted to reconcile?

Oh, that’s right. I was still a useful spouse appliance.

renee62
renee62
4 years ago

Cheater’s ring tone is Tracy’s voice stating “Trust that he sucks” repeatedly until I answer the call.
He rarely calls so I don’t hear it often. But it helps to be reminded.
Once he called while I was at my GF’s house. I had to explain the ringtone. She laughed & understood. She’s a Chump but she’s at Meh. I’m a work in progress hence the reminder.
Thanks CL & CN for understanding & helping us get to Meh.
Thanks Tracy for making the ringtone!!!

Traveling the World
Traveling the World
4 years ago
Reply to  renee62

That’s hilarious!

renee62
renee62
4 years ago

I forgot to mention that the ringtone is available through Patreon membership. Tracy posted them on 7/4/18- (*Independence Day)
There’s one for our male chumps as well with Tracy stating: “Trust that SHE sucks”.
And all entitled cheaters do suck!

I will be a lifelong supporter of CL & CN. They got me through the bad times when I doubted myself. I want CL to be available for the newbies who need to hear the truth.
Peace to all????????

Kara
Kara
4 years ago

I didn’t know what her name was in his phone because I didn’t know about her until late after the breakup.

But fellow Chumps of Chump Nation here’s a protip:

If your boyfriend uses thumbprint ID for security on his phone, and lets you put in your thumbprint as well as backup in case you need to use his phone, this is good.

HOWEVER if, almost a year later…

He hands you the phone to “look at something” but the screen goes black and then the phone DOES NOT ACCEPT YOUR THUMB AS VALID ID and locks you out…

You might have a red flag.

He is blocked on all social media and I don’t even remember what his number is. I wouldn’t recognize it if he did try to bother me.

My other exes aren’t in my phone. Ex husband is blocked. Don’t talk to the other fairly short-lived relationships. The only one that is in my phone is labeled as “Don’t talk to me.” Being honest I should probably just remove that one too. Considering….I don’t talk to him lol

ChumpSaidBuhBye
ChumpSaidBuhBye
4 years ago

He uses a burner phone layered with second number apps for all his shady dealings so that he can keep his personal phone clean. Everything is hidden and protected. He told me that the burner phone was an assigned work phone and I had no reason to doubt it. He was never protective or suspicious with his personal phone and would hand it to me freely to make calls for him, look things up, and use navigation. He was hardly ever on the supposed work phone and never acted weird about it either. I have no idea how he coded any contacts on the burner phone. I would never have felt entitled to go through someone else’s work equipment.

I’m total no contact with him now so there isn’t any contact information for him on any of my devices.

LifeIsGood
LifeIsGood
4 years ago

I don’t know how my ex had the twatapotomus listed in his phone, but I call GirlGeorge (because she looks EXACTLY like Boy George from The Culture Club) and he hates it. Of course, that makes it more fun!

Our divorce was just finalized and I am close to being able to block him forever. For now, he is listed in my phone as LCMC for Lying Cheating Man Child, with a photo of one of my favorite quotes: “Silence speaks when words cannot.” It reminds me not to answer if/when he calls, so I can enjoy the peaceful, happy life I am creating for myself.

Adaira
Adaira
4 years ago

He’s in my phone as Douchelord. He never had a secret name for schmoopie, but she has a gender neutral name.

The one that hurt was his contact name for me – Ball and Chain. I objected, but received the covert narc “I don’t know why you’re so upset! It’s just a joke! Everyone else thinks it’s funny!” line of reasoning. It remained Ball and Chain for YEARS. Looking back, it’s so obvious that’s how he truly saw me.

Hopeful Cynic
Hopeful Cynic
4 years ago
Reply to  Adaira

That could be a whole other Friday Funny. Names our cheaters called us behind our backs.

LetitSnow
LetitSnow
4 years ago
Reply to  Hopeful Cynic

Also a whole other Friday, texts that you received that were sopposed to go to her! Ha!
Have a great weekend!
LIS

Amazon Chump
Amazon Chump
4 years ago
Reply to  Adaira

How sad. But now you know that if anyone EVER refers to you in any disparaging way, dump his ass immediately. Red Flag!! I will never allow anyone to ‘joke’ at my expense again.

Kim
Kim
4 years ago

Mine wore one too! A really bad, cheap one.

I call him “shitty toupee guy”. That’s how my friends know him too. Dude, nobody thinks you have a ton of jet black weird looking hair that doesn’t blend well in your mid 60’s.

Lol. I know for a fact his coworkers make fun of him because one of his coworkers who remained my friend after she found out what a piece of shit he was told me.

Kim
Kim
4 years ago
Reply to  Kim

Sorry, duplicate of my reply to Happy.

Innocentsgone
Innocentsgone
4 years ago

His AP on his phone was “Coach Kelly”. I know now she was only an amateur golf coach. She only taught him how to get his stick in the hole and not the ball.

His icon on my phone is a “Shiny, Sparkly Unicorn”. My kids do not know why but I giggle every time I get a message.

But….he had to get a nurse AP. (#2 I know of) to get the stick out and now he is struggling to keep his needle in position. But I guess that is not working either because his current FB is a High School friend teaching him the basics.

One night when he was texting about the kids supposedly …I got irritated when he was complaining about his X AP and I said “She is really a nice lady and we could of been friends if you two were not FB”. He responded with Face Book Friends? I just smiled inside and said nothing.

I do use the word “boundaries” was too much when I communicate with my kid’s SD.

WonderNoMore
WonderNoMore
4 years ago

I took a Super Close-up of our toilet bowl for his picture, knowing my son may see my phone I didn’t want it obvious. I also had ‘SSF’ (Smelly Skank Fucker) under his name. OW really was a Skank and when I would get in his car it would sometimes smell like strong cheap perfume. When I asked why his car smelled he told me it was his buddy who wears too much cologne——-

He just had her real name in his phone, but yes, spent a lot of time in the bathroom with his phone. Weirdo—-

Matt
Matt
4 years ago
Reply to  WonderNoMore

My ex was either on the toilet with her phone or in front of the washer and dryer. She could not be approached from a blind side in either of those locations. There wasnt that much laundry to wash.

madkatie63
madkatie63
4 years ago

SPAR-her initials. And I changed his name to Mother Fucker in my contacts after the divorce. I was still consulting for his company and, after an MacOS update, my apple mail started pulling my own names for people and putting them in the address line. I had hit “reply all” to an email from someone who works directly under him -on which he was cc-d- and the mail app changed his name to “Mother Fucker” in the return email. I did not plan that and would have changed it if I had realized. I did change his name in my contacts back to his name. I learned from someone that it was thought to be funny and several of the team were new employees and didn’t know I was his ex wife.

Much Better Off Now
Much Better Off Now
4 years ago
Reply to  madkatie63

Madkatie63-

That’s pretty damn hilarious! Ex cheater douchebag and I work at the same place. Whenever an email comes up (viewed on my phone) that he is cc’d on, it shows up as “D-bag”- his assigned name.

madkatie63
madkatie63
4 years ago

Yes-I had thought mine was just the phone thing as well. Because prior to that, I had not seen my nicknames being visible to the recipient. And I did get a kick out of Siri on Apple CarPlay reading the occasional text about visitation arrangements in her robot voice, “Mother Fucker says he cannot pick up Emily until 7pm.”

Amazon Chump
Amazon Chump
4 years ago
Reply to  madkatie63

That is so funny! Both the global email and Siri.