Old Holiday Dysfunction (OHD) — Your drunk father-in-law rails on about One World Order conspiracies while his wife passive aggressively refuses to acknowledge your casserole. “Oh, I must’ve forgotten those roasted brussel sprouts. Left them under the broiler. Oops. I suppose they were… organic?” Meanwhile, your cheater is locked in a bathroom texting with Schmoopie.
New Holiday Tradition (NHT) — Cooking dinner in your pajamas! A gathering of friends and family! (i.e., people who LIKE you!) Pumpkin pie for breakfast! All the organic, roasted brussel sprouts you can eat! A long walk after dinner and then marathon BBC dramas til the tryptophan kicks in.
So chumps — what’s your new tradition?