In the early days of the blog and holiday Freak of the Week contests, we had a winner with BarristerBelle who described her then-husband’s reaction to being busted for cheating:
After D-Days 1-3, XH was desperately pretending to reconcile. Then I saw OW-dingbat-paralegal’s text on his phone after we’d just had dinner with his grandmother. Here’s what happened next:
1. XH threw the deck chairs into the pool, then jumped into the pool fully clothed in his suit and shoes.
2. As I was calling dingbat OW to have a chat w/her, he ran into the house. After searching the rooms and yelling for him, I found him hiding upstairs, naked and lying in a sleeping bag on the floor.
3. He didn’t feel like talking to me, so he stood up and – still wearing only the sleeping bag – bunny hopped his way out of the room, and slid down the stairs on his butt (like sledding down a hill!)
This, of course, was then immortalized into a cartoon. (BarristerBelle, last I heard, went on to have a very nice life. You can read her update here.)
And if you think that’s weird, consider the fellow whose busted wife chewed their throw pillows when confronted. Also cartoon fodder.
Were any soft furnishing harmed? Sleeping bags defiled? Did anyone wet themselves? When the mindfuck channel of self-pity is set to 11, some freaky things can happen.