A bunch of you sent me the news yesterday that Jeff Zucker has been buried in giant avalanche of schadenfreude.
The now former-CNN president suddenly stepped down because he’s been having a long professional relationship of mutual respect and consent with his subordinate, Allison Gollust.
Their ex-spouses were not available for comment on the whole “respect and consent” thing but hey, whatevz. Allison says this deep friendship didn’t start until COVID.
Broadcaster Katie Couric suggests an entirely different timeline. People reports:
In her October 2021 memoir, Couric mentioned how Zucker previously “made a huge push to bring on Allison Gollust” at NBCUniversal…
She adds, “The problem was, we’d already hired a PR person for the show. There wasn’t a role for Allison. Jeff asked me to meet with her anyway.”
In the excerpt, Couric writes about wondering “why Jeff was angling so hard to bring Allison on board” and recalled the time when Gollust “and her husband and kids had moved into the apartment above” the one Zucker shared with his now ex-wife, Caryn Nathanson. (Zucker shares four children with Nathanson. Their divorce was finalized in 2018.)
“Everyone who heard about the cozy arrangement thought it was super strange,” Couric writes. “By that point, [Zucker’s then-wife] Caryn had become a close friend and it made me really uncomfortable.”
You and your smutty mind, CN! It’s a 20 year professional partnership! Chances are good you’ll wind up in the exact same apartment tier as your boss when you live in a city of over 8 million people.
The tabloid The New York Post reports:
And as the pair took vacations together, went apartment hunting and going into each other’s hotel rooms for alleged “meetings,” Gollust has spent years lying about their affair, blasting reporters on numerous occasions for being “sexist” by suggesting she was sleeping with her boss.
The affair between Zucker and Gollust — who have worked together for 25 years — stretches back to when they both worked at NBC, according to multiple sources.
Hey, the important thing to know is that Allison is really sorry and she’s going to step down, just like Jeff. Oh hang on, that didn’t happen. But she’s sorry! Oh… oops. No, sorry either. But she regrets “not disclosing it at the right time.”
How about creating a shitty work environment for women who were hoping to succeed on merit and not cocksucking? Sorry, Allison’s regrets must be lost in her calendar. Pencil me in. Next Thursday? Subject: You suck patriarchy dick.
Anyway, Jeff Zucker. Had he wanted job security, he would’ve wanked off on a Zoom call with his co-workers like Jeffrey Toobin.
Zucker’s purported sin was not disclosing his consensual relationship. But non-consensual dick exposure? Promote that guy!
I hear there’s a job opening for CNN president.