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CHUMP LADY ARCHIVES
IT’S ALL HERE!
Thousands of posts since 2012, this is a dataset of mightiness. This is where chump stories live, in posts and comments. You’ll discover your cheater isn’t unique. Their manipulations are common. And your nightmare is finite. (The pain stops on Tuesday.)
ALL THE THINGS I CANNOT SAY
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1-12 of 2,469 results
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My Husband Wants a Polyamorous Marriage
Her husband suddenly announced he wants a polyamorous marriage. Turns out he was already in one, but she didn’t know. *** Dear Chump Lady, My husband has just announced that he is a polyamorist. He is sleeping with at least two other woman at the moment and says that he will never be monogamous again!… -
I’ll Leave Him After I Lose Weight
She wants to leave him, but only after she loses weight. So then he’ll feel like he’s really missing something. She knows this is dumb, but is stuck on this stupid idea. *** Dear Chump Lady, I know this is ridiculous, but somehow I am stuck on this point. I’ve been waiting to lose 20… -
Do I Have to Be Friendly with My Ex?
She wants to know if she’s required to be friendly with her ex because they have children together. Can’t they just coexist? Separately? *** Hi Chump Lady, My question is about whether I’m supposed to be friendly to my cheating ex-husband when around the children (14-year-old twin girls). We are divorced now, it’s been 2… -
When Does the Pain Stop? (Tuesday)
When does the pain of betrayal stop hurting? Why can’t she see him for who he really is and throw him out? *** Dear Chump Lady, Tonight is a hard night for some reason. It has been 11 months since D-Day. And since then stories of other affairs and how long I have been a… -
I Still Want to Call Him
After 33 years of marriage, she still wants to call him. Even though he cheated and dumped her. How can she break this habit? *** Dear Chump Lady, I have been living and following my resolution for three months now — “Chump no more.” You have shown me the light, enabled me to make the… -
UBT: Joseph’s Letter
If you’ve spent any time on reconciliation boards, you’re familiar with Joseph’s Letter. It was written by a member of a defunct forum “BAN”, but appears at Surviving Infidelity and Marriage Builders. It’s a plea from a man (Joseph) to his wayward wife to please answer questions about her affair instead of doing the ol’ rug… -
Reconsider? Let’s not
When a cheater asks you to reconsider and centers themselves over your pain, it’s probably not a good idea to answer the call. A primer on hoovering. *** Hello baby, yes it’s really me After the wrong I’ve done Guess you’re surprised to see me here at your door Like a sparrow with a broken… -
She Wants to Apologize for Cheating on Me
His wife had a two-year affair and he’s been no contact, but now she wants to apologize… in person. And he totally dreads it. Can he skip it? *** Dear Chump Lady, Four months ago, I uncovered an affair my wife had been having for the past two years (possible longer) with her co-worker. They… -
I Don’t Have Any Good Memories of My Cheating Ex
Her kids want to discuss their childhoods, but she doesn’t have any good memories of her cheating ex and thinking back is too painful. *** Dear Chump Lady, I am having a problem. I was chumped 5 years ago this month and I am in a good place now, remarried, etc. But my issue is:… -
Be the Support You Wish You Had
A kind reminder to be the support you wish you had. It’s often hard to out yourself as a chump to the un-chumped. But it changes the narrative. *** I begrudge no one their meh. It’s so hard won. But do me one favor as you move on to happier pastures: Be the support you… -
UBT: “You’re not capable of forgiveness.”
He tells her he’s not “capable of forgiveness” after she rejected his attempt to reconcile. And then sends a barrage of hateful texts. *** Dear Chump Lady, I’ve been divorced since February but now my ex is asking if we can “try again.” His last text tirade started with, “I miss you so much and… -
I Want My Cheating Wife to Know That I Know About Her Affair
He wants his cheating wife to know that he knows about her affair with her boss. Could speaking to Human Resources backfire? What’s a revenge-seeking chump to do? *** Dear Chump Lady, I am a chump. About 3 months ago I got into a fight with my wife and during the course of it she…
POPULAR POSTS
The posts everyone sends their friends.
What Marriage Counselors Get Wrong About Infidelity
Marriage counseling on infidelity usually presumes reconciliation. Like this article in the Washington Post that the Universal Bullshit Translator recently pilloried — “Should an Affair Be Disclosed?…
When Does the Pain Stop? (Tuesday)
When does the pain of betrayal stop hurting? Why can’t she see him for who he really is and throw him out? *** Dear Chump Lady, Tonight is a hard night for some reason. It has been 11 months since D-Day. And since then stories of other affairs and how long I have been a…
My Ex Is Introducing Her Affair Partner to the Kids
He’s recently divorced and distressed that his ex wants to introduce her affair partner to the kids. They don’t know mom cheated. *** Dear Chump Lady, Here is my situation. I’m 6 months divorced from my wife of 15 years. We have 4 kids, ages 5, 7, 9, and 11 (yes, we planned well). Long…
Tell Me How You’re Mighty
Tracy, co-host Sarah Gorrell and guests talk infidelity, recovery, and the mysteries of the karma bus.
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