ChumpLady.com

Leave a cheater, gain a life

Grieving the Affair Partner and Other BS

by

Here’s a Reconciliation Industrial Complex trope that can die in ignominy — chumps being patient as their cheater “grieves” the affair partner. Ain’t that special? What sort of quack gives license to the mope-fest that is the tragic loss of cake? “Oh, if you reconcile, you must show love and understanding to your partner right […]

Should I Write the OW?

by

Dear Chump Lady, My husband left “temporarily” two years ago after my teenagers confronted him about his chronic emotional and verbal abuse. After a weird few weeks, he started accepting he had a problem and swore he wanted to get back together. He also swore the woman he moved in with was a lesbian roommate. […]

The Benevolent Other Woman

by

An alert chump sent me A Letter To The Woman Whose Man Cheated On Her With Me. The OW is “Aria.” The chump girlfriend is “Candy.” I think these names have to be made up. Aria? Seriously? You’re an operatic solo full of passion and meaning and the chump is some frivolous confection? A Mars […]

‘How Do I Handle the OW?’

by

Dear Chump Lady, How do I handle this bitch?! My husband left me last year because he needed “space.” Come to find out he has been seen with one of my “friends” —  a mom at the children’s school — for the last two years! They live in the same apartment complex. I spoke to her husband […]

‘He Didn’t Suck’

by

Dear Chump Lady, Finding your webpage was the best thing happened to me lately as I was about to lose my sanity. I spent hours reading about people’s stories, but I did not come across a case similar to mine, so I am still struggling. I know this is long, but I do not know […]

‘Why Does My Ex Want to Be Friends?’

by

Dear Chump Lady, Can you please tell me why cheaters so badly want to remain friends? A little background information — my ex-husband and I were married for 16 years, have 2 kids (15 & 12), have been separated for a little over 2 years, divorced for one. I found out 2 days before our […]

UBT on Guy Who Wants to Keep Both Sex Workers and His Girlfriend

by

‘Tis the season for cake. Here’s a new flavor, courtesy of some whackadoodle advice columnist at Slate — a guy who’s dating an “amazing” woman, but doesn’t want to give up his hooker habit. I (35, male) started dating someone (33, female) recently that I’ve really enjoyed connecting with and have found a higher level […]

‘I Can’t Trust That She Sucks’

by

Dear Chump Lady, My wife left me for another man 8 months ago. You could argue that she didn’t TECHNICALLY cheat on me (at least before our separation). However, she had been laying the groundwork with him before she asked me for the separation. As soon as she asked me…BOOM…she was out the door three […]

UBT Responds to Ex Dictating Where Kids Can Open Presents

by

Dear Chump Lady, My ex, after a year and a half, thinks that we should still be buying joint gifts for the kids, and signing them from ‘mom and dad’. I disagree and have sent him a request that I will be doing my own Christmas with the boys at my house and he should […]

‘I Feel Guilty for Leaving Him’

by

Dear Chump Lady, I discovered in September 2018 that my husband of 3 years (together a total of 13 years) had been having a 2-year affair with his coworker. (The affair started before our 1-year wedding anniversary and spanned our time trying to get pregnant, our time doing IVF, while I was pregnant and while […]