ChumpLady.com

Leave a cheater, gain a life

‘I Feel Guilty for Leaving Him’

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Dear Chump Lady, I discovered in September 2018 that my husband of 3 years (together a total of 13 years) had been having a 2-year affair with his coworker. (The affair started before our 1-year wedding anniversary and spanned our time trying to get pregnant, our time doing IVF, while I was pregnant and while […]

Spending Holidays with Your Ex ‘For The Children’

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Chump Lady, Can you do a post about having to spend holidays with the ex or not see your kids? I’m in another chat room for new moms. All the ladies there are talking about divorced parents and how they need to suck it up and hang out together for Christmas or not see their […]

Dear Chump Lady, What happens to couple friends after divorce?

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Dear Chump Lady, I am 6 months post-divorce after discovering my ex-wife’s infidelity.  My question is what happens to couple friends after divorce? Can anyone remain impartial and be friends with both sides, or do things naturally drift one way or the other over time? Can I remain friends with someone who has seen me […]

Dear Chump Lady, Is divorcing him the right choice?

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Dear Chump Lady, I need so help. I have looked through archives and posts and I just need some clarity on my particular situation. I’m struggling to get through each day. Let me give you some backstory: “Bob” and I got pregnant by accident. He wasn’t supportive. I lost my job and moved in with […]

How Do I Gain a Life Before the Divorce Is Final?

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Hi Chump Lady, I’d love yours and the input of CN on the transition between Leaving the Cheater and Gaining the Life. I feel I’m in transit, like I boarded the plane to Meh on Monday, and I’m about to touch down into Tuesday with a few bags and a little bit of hope. It’s […]

If It Feels Good — Don’t Do It

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Psssst! I have a little secret to lay on you…. People are not interested in your messy divorce. Okay, maybe your parents and closest friend. Certainly it sucks for your children. But the rest of humanity? I’m sorry. They do not care for the particulars. I know how unjust this is, especially if you’ve been cheated […]

How Do You Divorce a Narcissist?

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Dear Chump Lady, Although he fits the readings, although the therapists tell you he is a narcissist, you don’t quite believe it. It isn’t quite human. How can someone be this weird? I decided when I worked out that our “reconciliation” was actually emotional abuse, when I discovered I had descended into a bitter, hopeless, […]

What Do You Tell Yourself?

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Dear Chump Lady, What do all the mighty people tell themselves when it’s too much? When you’re struggling for air? When not even your family understands? When you’re not allowed to complain? When you can’t show weakness? (After all, anything that can be used against you in court, WILL be.) When your kids fall for […]

Dear Chump Lady, She was ‘going to make it up to me’

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Hello Chump Lady, I’ve been reading your posts for the past three years understanding and yet ignoring all of your sage advice till just recently. Love is not only blind, it’s deaf, dumb, and stupid as well. I discovered 5 of my wife’s affairs in 2016. After a psychotic break and several suicide attempts back […]