ChumpLady.com

Leave a cheater, gain a life

Dear Chump Lady, He told me not to tell

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Dear Chump Lady, I’m a 36-year-old military wife who found out my husband was cheating early last month (February). It began as an emotional affair with his assistant flight chief that later turned sexual. My husband as never cheated before. I was actually in total shock to find out he had. We are in our […]

Dear Chump Lady, The OW is the ‘Girl Next Door’

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Dear Chump Lady, My husband has been having sex with the same person since before we got married in 1995 and I never knew it. Yet, he has accused me of cheating on him our entire marriage and I have never cheated on him! On a recent visit to the doctor, he was sent to […]

Trickle Truth Is Neither Trickle Nor Truth

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Add to the list of Reconciliation Industrial Complex euphemisms I despise — “trickle truth.” I’ve ranted about “wayward” before and the “fog,” but it only recently occurred to me that “trickle truth” is equally moronic… or Orwellian. (Moronically Orwellian? Deviously Orwellian? Anyway…) “Trickle truth” is like “truthiness,” the term comedian Stephen Colbert coined for the rebranding of […]

Dear Chump Lady, My wife kissed a coworker

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Dear Chump Lady, My wife and I were good friends for 5 years, dated for almost another 5 and have been married for 8 years, have 2 kids, with our 9th anniversary coming up at the end of this month. Prior to marriage, she had dated only one other guy, I dated several others and […]

Dear Chump Lady, Where do I put his stuff?

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Dear Chump Lady, I need some advice on what to do with cheater’s stuff. My partner of 16 years left me and our 9-year-old for the Other Woman (aka new love of life/soulmate) 5 weeks ago after second D-Day and moved straight from our family home into the new love nest. He has known Schmoopie […]

The Dead Cheater Dilemma

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Dear Chump Lady: My story is similar but somewhat different from the many I have read on your site. My husband and I were high school sweethearts, together for 40 years, married for 33. He suddenly became ill and died within a week of (non-smoking) lung cancer. It was a shock and I was devastated…. […]

Are Cheaters Timid Forest Creatures?

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After you’ve been cheated on, you’d think it’s a pretty simple decision tree — reconcile or divorce. Choose divorce, it doesn’t matter if your cheater is sorry or not sorry, the infidelity is a deal breaker. If you choose reconciliation, however, the matter of How Sorry Are They comes to the forefront of the decision. […]

“I’ve changed!” — The Chump Response

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I reckon I’ve read tens of thousands of infidelity stories to date. Maybe hundreds of thousands. (I should crunch the numbers.) And one common recitation I read time and again after D-Day, is when cheaters, threatened with the loss of cake, don unicorn costumes and tell chumps that they’ve changed. “I’m a new man!” “Let’s make […]

I Haven’t Been Happy for a Long Time

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The other week someone asked me to decode, “I haven’t been happy for a long time.” (Also sometimes expressed as “WE haven’t been happy for a long time.”) It’s trotted out when the chump is looking for an explanation as to why their family life just blew up. Well DUH. “I haven’t been happy for […]