ChumpLady.com

Leave a cheater, gain a life

‘I Want to Blast Them on Facebook’

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Dear Chump Lady, I just found out after 5 or 6 years of absolute insane digging (mental breakdowns, trips to rehabs, gaslighting to the extreme, abuse that would cause anyone to want to kill themselves) that my dear darling husband’s side piece is no other than my fucking NEIGHBOR!!!!! I was on here about a […]

What Kept You Stuck with a Cheater?

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Very few people react to betrayal with calm and clarity. We’re broadsided. Flattened. Confused. Most of us ran with the unicorn herd for awhile and tried to reconcile. Some are still working it out, either hanging in there to see if the remorse is real, or lining up the ducks in case it isn’t. I’ve […]

Is This Intense Hate Normal?

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Dear Chump Lady, Is it okay that I actually feel hate toward my cheater until I get to my Tuesday and meh? 20 years and a 15-year-old daughter; D-Day 1 in September 2019. I agreed to reconcile for our daughter’s sake. D-Day 2 this March 2020 as the world goes on lockdown, the cheater tells […]

‘He’s a Different Person Than I Used to Know’

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Dear Chump Lady, The past several months have been some of the worst of my life. Three months after having a baby, I discovered that my husband had some sort of relationship with the 46-year-old neighbor across the street. We had just moved in and got married when I was pregnant, so he immediately started […]

‘We Had a Good Life. Why Did He Cheat?’

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Dear Chump Lady, I come to you as perplexed and heartbroken. When you think about how many people experience this kind of betrayal, it is really a sad thing. I had been with my soon-to-be ex-husband for almost six years. Despite his two children from his first marriage, (and another child he found out about […]

Dear Chump Lady, When does the pain go away?

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Dear Chump Lady, My question for you and perhaps more so, Chump Nation, is when, how long does it take before the pain goes away? How many days, months, years does it take until you wake up and go a day, few days, weeks without thinking about him? What are the experiences of your readers? […]

How to Leave a Cheater — Your Care Team

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Last week I got a letter from a physician, Kimberly, who told me part of her medical practice is dealing with the newly chumped. We all know the D-Day experience — the shock, the weight loss, the sleeplessness. Since I’ve done this blog, however, I’d never heard from the medical side of things.  Kimberly, former […]

Dear Chump Lady, He said it was ‘just sex’

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Dear Chump Lady, Three weeks ago I got a DM on Instagram from the OW telling me, my boyfriend of 2 years (and father of my baby) and her have been seeing each other for 7 months — same amount of months of my pregnancy. I confronted him, he still tried to lie about it. […]

Surely You Must Have Known

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Are your powers of premonition pretty lousy? Me too. I have no idea who is going to win the election or what the stock market is going to do next quarter. But when it comes to infidelity, you would’ve thought that everyone is clairvoyant and that particular super power skipped you. Because after you discover your […]