I don’t know what to make of British Prime Minister Boris Johnson. He seems to be a creature constructed entirely of pomposity and paste. His self-regard could be a renewable energy source. A famous philanderer, one of his former Schmoopies, Jennifer Arcuri, made headlines this week for confirming, that yes, she had an affair with […]
Derrick Jaxn, The Latest Unicorn
The Reconciliation Industrial Complex has a new star — “self-love guru” now busted serial cheater, Derrick Jaxn. Seen here in a hostage video with his chump wife, squeezing the life-force out of her arm, lest she flee, or have full oxygen flow to her brain, he offers that why yes, he did cheat. And it […]
Mighty MacKenzie
Talk about Leave a Cheater, Gain a Life. Congrats to MacKenzie Scott this week on her marriage to science teacher Dan Jewett. A solid guy, by all accounts, who thrills to teaching high school chemistry and supporting good causes. As compared to MacKenzie’s ex-husband, Jeff Bezos, the wealthiest man in the world, founder of Amazon. […]
Dump ‘Scorned’ Already
Here’s a word I’d like to see disappear from the infidelity conversation — scorned. (Almost always referring to a woman.) “Scorned Detroit Woman Lists Cheating Ex’s Batmobile on Craigslist.” Really Fox news affiliate? Really? SHE OWNED THE CAR. “Since the car was in my name, I decided to repossess it from him,” she says, smiling. She posted […]
Jason Collier, Serial Douche
Many alert chumps sent me the story of the Stinnett, Texas police chief Jason Collier, who was arrested this week for allegedly faking an annulment so his Schmoopie would think he was free to marry. Jason is a married, ordained minister and father of four with a love triangle (rectangle, dodecahedron… I never tire of […]
Jeffrey Toobin’s Troublesome Dick
To anyone catching up, U.S. legal analyst and journalist Jeffrey Toobin was given indefinite leave after whipping his dick out on a Zoom call. Thus giving new meaning to “talking head.” How this happened is a bit murky on the specifics. (I mean, other than unzipping his trousers and presenting his special friend to his […]
Woman Has D-Day After Reading Ex’s Wedding Announcement
So how many of you had startling discoveries of infidelity after the divorce? It’s not unheard of here at Chump Nation. But one poor woman, Nikyta Moreno, discovered she was cheated on when she read a wedding announcement in the New York Time’s ‘Vows’ section. Moreno told her story to the New York Post. “According to […]
Man Sues Affair Partner — And Wins
Did you see this story last week? About the guy in North Carolina who sued his wife’s affair partner with a “homewrecker” law — and won a $750,000 verdict? North Carolina is one of 8 states that still has “alienation of affection” laws on the books, although they are rarely enforced. So, this win is […]
‘Being Frank’ versus Being Chumped
The new Jim Gaffigan comedy Being Frank is a chump Springtime for Hitler — a terrible idea that someone inexplicably green-lighted. Of course The Producer’s “Springtime for Hitler” is fiction (and the joke is it’s a hit); Being Frank is an actual movie that’s a flop. The premise: Teenage son, Phillip, discovers his hard-ass father, Frank, […]
UBT: ProJared’s Divorce Statement
The Universal Bullshit Translator was awakened from its slumber to several insistent tweets that it tackle some sort of ProJared bullshit. The UBT had no idea what a ProJared was, as the “Pimp my dragon mount!” segment of the economy is unfamiliar to a simple analog machine. Apparently, among the savvy sorts who fancy themselves goblins, ProJared […]
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