Dear Chump Lady, It’s 4 months now after D-Day (got a text message at the death bed of my mum in May with heartfelt birthday wishes to the love of his life, whilst my birthday is in December) and 1.5 months since my husband of 30 years walked out on his family and is now […]
Is This Hoovering?
Dear Chump Lady I am no contact with my ex-boyfriend, and have been since August. He “wanted a break” in January, but I didn’t know that he already had his vastly inferior-to-me girlfriend already waiting in the wings. At this time, he would hoover me in once a month using some pretense (documents he could […]
I Just Want Her to Be Truthful
Dear Chump Lady, I recently broke up with my girlfriend of two years. I had suspicion that she was seeing someone else after she came home drunk one day at 8 in the morning and I kicked her out of my apartment. Her iPhone was connected to her iPad, and she had left it here, […]
He Doesn’t Know If He’ll Come Home
Dear Chump Lady. He left December 5th out of nowhere. He went to work and showed up with a u-haul. He told me for weeks that he was coming home and it was just a break. He took our son and got caught out with another girl. I left him the weekend before over her. […]
Rocking the No Contact
Incoming bullshit? Repel! Today’s Fun Friday Challenge is to tell CN how that no contact’s going. In yesterday’s post, Dr. Chumphead commented: You know, since I have gone completely no contact, I am much better. Even when I did it in the beginning, I was better. But I didn’t set strong enough boundaries that he […]
Should I Send a Father’s Day Card?
Dear Chump Lady, I’m struggling right now because Father’s Day is coming. My dad is dead and I am nearly divorced from my husband. I have children who are 17, 21 and 24. My 21-year-old is autistic but verbal. What do I do about these special holidays, Father’s Day, Christmas, and birthdays for him? Personally […]
No Contact Fails — The Blooper Reel
This “Fun” Friday contest was suggested by an intrepid chump — no contact fails, the outtakes. If your chumpy existence was a Bloopers show — what mortifying episode would you highlight? That time you pet sat for her when she was in the Bahamas with the Other Man? Drunken sexting? Did you spend a few months […]
He’s Having a Baby with the OW
Dear Chump Lady, It’s me, again. Doubly Chumped. I wrote to you back in January about being duped by two FWs in my life — my husband and one of my bridesmaids. Well, I’m back in apartment fighting back tears and extremely bitter that this whole non-linear grieving thing is real. I went no contact […]
No Contact, Gray Rock, and Other Kinds of Mighty
Rocking the gray rock? Today’s Friday Challenge is to share how you’ve mastered the art of low contact. In a perfect world, you could have total no contact, but for people still slogging through divorce, enduring in-house separation, or co-parenting with fuckwits, gray rock is the coping strategy of choice. It requires discipline — not […]
Can I Tell His Family He Cheated?
Dear Chump Lady, My STBX informed me two weeks before Quarantine Thanksgiving that we had to talk. I shut the lid of my laptop and asked, “What do you want to talk about? Do you want to watch something together?” (I was deep into an episode of something that he hated.) He said, “I want […]
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