Psssst! I have a little secret to lay on you…. People are not interested in your messy divorce. Okay, maybe your parents and closest friend. Certainly it sucks for your children. But the rest of humanity? I’m sorry. They do not care for the particulars. I know how unjust this is, especially if you’ve been cheated […]
Dear Chump Lady, My therapist says don’t tell anyone he cheated
Dear Chump Lady, Do you think chumps should tell their family and friends that the reason they are separated from their spouse is because he/she cheated? My marriage counselor (MC)’s advice was that the reason for the separation was not anyone else’s business and said that by telling the truth (i.e. their spouse cheated) the betrayed […]
Why Can’t I Say ‘Cheater’?
Dear Chump Lady. I love your blog, but I am on the fence about staying or leaving. I am in recovery mode. I follow several people on Twitter for and against reconciliation and today I was shocked to see the post from Rosie Joseph and Elle saying not to use the word “cheater.” Why the […]
Dear Chump Lady, How do I save my friend?
Hi Chump Lady, Please advise regarding my friend whom I think is making a mess of her life with a rebound relationship. My ex left 3 years ago for an OW, and his best friend followed suit 6 months later for his OW, leaving my friend with 3 small kids. A whole 3 months later […]
UBT: ProJared’s Divorce Statement
The Universal Bullshit Translator was awakened from its slumber to several insistent tweets that it tackle some sort of ProJared bullshit. The UBT had no idea what a ProJared was, as the “Pimp my dragon mount!” segment of the economy is unfamiliar to a simple analog machine. Apparently, among the savvy sorts who fancy themselves goblins, ProJared […]
Dear Chump Lady, Do I tell the kids about the cheating?
Dear Chump Lady, I have been married for almost 17 years, together for 21 years. The first time I caught him cheating it was all online, but included phone sex, cam sex, and lost of graphic instant messaging back and forth — with a woman we both know! The next time I caught him it […]
Dear Chump Lady, He told me not to tell
Dear Chump Lady, I’m a 36-year-old military wife who found out my husband was cheating early last month (February). It began as an emotional affair with his assistant flight chief that later turned sexual. My husband as never cheated before. I was actually in total shock to find out he had. We are in our […]
Dear Chump Lady, The OW is the ‘Girl Next Door’
Dear Chump Lady, My husband has been having sex with the same person since before we got married in 1995 and I never knew it. Yet, he has accused me of cheating on him our entire marriage and I have never cheated on him! On a recent visit to the doctor, he was sent to […]
‘Is it my fault my ex ran off with our nanny?’
Dear Chump Lady, My ex-husband cheated and ran off with the nanny. According to my ‘friends’ and family, it’s all my fault and they knew all along that this was coming. I feel like I’m being abused and cheated on all over again when they say these things. Can you please please put these sentences […]
Dear Chump Lady, He wants a character reference
Hi CL, I was married for 25+ years to a serial cheater, liar, sex addict, abuser, manipulator (yeah, he was all that and a bag of chips). I finally threw him out last summer and we were divorced last fall — best thing I ever did. We haven’t communicated much (a good thing), but we […]
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