Dear Chump Lady, My wife and I separated last year after she had a year-long affair with a colleague from work. Later on it had become apparent that she had seen other guys prior as well, over years , she went to the city where her parents live and went out to bars to meet […]
UBT: “Blowing up the Marriage to Improve the Marriage”
A submission here from “Deaun” to the Universal Bullshit Translator that was too fucked up to pass over. According to my counselor [the affair] was a subconscious way of blowing up our marriage to improve it. It was physiological, my brain enjoyed the dopamine. I’m assuming from the “my brain enjoyed the dopamine” Deaun is the […]
UBT: ‘Don’t give up on me!’
Dear Chump Lady, Long-time reader, first-time UBT submitter. I’m a gay man and was with my ex-boyfriend for about 7 years. I need some UBT help on a handwritten letter I got from him after official no-contact for a month and some change. I still love him and am weak in the knees after getting […]
UBT on Guy Who Wants to Keep Both Sex Workers and His Girlfriend
‘Tis the season for cake. Here’s a new flavor, courtesy of some whackadoodle advice columnist at Slate — a guy who’s dating an “amazing” woman, but doesn’t want to give up his hooker habit. I (35, male) started dating someone (33, female) recently that I’ve really enjoyed connecting with and have found a higher level […]
UBT Responds to Ex Dictating Where Kids Can Open Presents
Dear Chump Lady, My ex, after a year and a half, thinks that we should still be buying joint gifts for the kids, and signing them from ‘mom and dad’. I disagree and have sent him a request that I will be doing my own Christmas with the boys at my house and he should […]
UBT: What Sleeping With Married Men Taught Me About Infidelity
Oh Modern Love, what-the-everliving-fuck? A bazillion of you sent me Sunday’s New York Time’s ML column — a look at relationships from the point of view of a 49-year-old woman who screws married men. Because… well, you know how it goes after divorce, when you create Tinder profiles for no-strings-attached sex, and lonely, tragically misunderstood, sexless men reply […]
UBT: ‘It’s Not Who I Am’
Dear Chump Lady, Can you please put this through the Universal Bullshit Translator? I do know what the affair did to you, and I’m sincerely and deeply sorry. If I could go back, I would have done a lot of things very differently. You were extremely negative and controlling (You still are), and you were […]
UBT: My Husband Stopped Cheating on Me After 35 Years
The UBT can’t even. The Universal Bullshit Translator got several requests to shred the Guardian’s “Family” feature (seriously editors, FAMILY? Really?) “My husband has stopped cheating on me after 35 years“. It’s the confessions of a woman who stood for her marriage and at last report has won a decades-long pick me dance. Among the […]
UBT This Jesus Cheater
Dear Chump Lady, So my husband of seven years fed me the fairytale. Everything you would want in a husband he encompassed. He was handsome, loving, supportive, kind, thoughtful, caring — the list could go on. He was also religious, which made me finding his text messages to his girlfriend on Christmas Eve even more fitting. I […]
UBT: “We Are Teachers, Not Demigods”
Dear Chump Lady, I have a small but delicious morsel for the UBT to chew on. I also have a predicament, and I would greatly appreciate your and CN’s feedback. A few years ago my husband — we’re not divorced yet, but will be soon — had a very sexual affair with a coworker. Let’s […]
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