Dear Chump Lady, During my shock of learning and trying to understand why he cheated on me, when I thought we had a great relationship (he was full of remorse after girlfriend #1 and begged for forgiveness..) — he is now leaving me for girlfriend #2. I have stated the obvious to him that what […]
Dear Chump Lady, The OW gave me a brownie plate
Dear Chump Lady, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you cover this topic, and my fellow chumpy friends and I are mystified by this behavior… Schmoopie (the one that my husband/partner of 23 years left me for last year) gives ME (the chumpy ex-wife) gifts! What the…..? I have never met Schmoopie in person. She […]
“Do Cheaters All Work from the Same Script?”
Dear Chump Lady, After faithfully reading this blog and thinking about all that we have been through I still have questions. 1. How did all of these cheaters from all over the world basically learn the same script? I read everyone’s posts and I keep hearing the same dialogue that I had with my ex. […]
Dear Chump Lady, Was I THAT bad?
Hi Chump Lady, I’m a chump, my ex-wife cheated on me with a man twice her age, 59, and then left me and moved in with him after I found out. We both have decent jobs, had the house of our dreams and neither of us wanted kids, so we had plenty of freedom. The […]
Out of Sight, Out of Mind
A common point of chump bafflement is why we attach so hard when cheaters detach so easily. I get some very, very long letters trying to untangle this particular skein. She told me she loved me, and texted the OM hearts and smileys 30 seconds later. He walked out on four children. I had cancer […]
What Do We See in Narcissists Anyway?
As much as I advise against untangling the skein of fuckupedness, we chumps (myself included) spend a lot of time decoding cheaters, narcissists, and the other assorted wing nuts in our lives. But really, the best policy once you’ve determined someone is toxic is to steer clear. File them under “Creep” and adjust your life […]
Dear Chump Lady, He left me to BLOG with the OW?
Dear Chump Lady, I have a question. I am a bit perplexed. My husband ran off with a married coworker. He’s a true runaway, abandoned the kids and I back in January. A friend sent me a link to a blog today (gotta love the internet). The link opened up to a blog started by […]
Dear Chump Lady, What if there was no sex?
Hi Chump Lady, What would you do if your husband did the following behaviors in an 11 year marriage (two early elementary kids)? He says this is all that ever happened. 1). Went to the strippers about 15 times since the year we had our kids). 2). Had 4 lap dances where strippers put breasts […]
Emotional Affairs, Exit Affairs, and Ghosts
Dear Chump Lady, Can I still be in the CN club? Do I still get to hate my husband as much as everyone else here gets to hate their crappy spouses even though he was “a moral cheater”? Mine didn’t want even want cake….ghosts don’t eat cake. We were married for 5 years, with two […]
Dear Chump Lady, Why does the OW want to meet me?
Hi Chump Lady, I wonder if I could get your take on something that’s bugging me. I am just over a year out from D-Day. My husband had been home a few months from an overseas Army assignment, and I discovered the REAL reason he wanted a divorce had less to do with falling out […]
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