Category: Untangling the Skein

OW walk

Dear Chump Lady, What are OW thinking?

Hi Chump Lady! Your website has been extremely helpful on my journey to recovery from my STBXH cheating on me while I was pregnant and …

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Dear Chump Lady, How do I stop feeling sorry for him?

Dear Chump Lady It took 5 years to divorce the ex and father of our daughter after he suddenly thought it fun to beat our …

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Want to spot a narcissist? Just ask one.

So this psychological study popped up in my feed recently. Researchers at Ohio State tried to simplify the Narcissist Personality Inventory test. You know that …

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One Off Cheaters versus Serial Cheaters?

Dear Chump Lady, I was wondering about serial versus (presumably) one-off cheaters. I know they both suck. But it’s hard if your cheater only cheated …

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Dear Chump Lady, Do they turn bad or were they always bad?

Dear Chump Lady, It’s been almost 10 months since D-Day. Things are slowly but surely getting better for me after finding out that my tramp …

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Waiting for karma

Dear Chump Lady, I can’t get over being replaced

Dear Chump Lady, I was chumped big time. My once sweet, loving husband left me for a girl at work. Problem is, it was a …

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Dear Chump Lady, The OW gave me a brownie plate

Dear Chump Lady, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you cover this topic, and my fellow chumpy friends and I are mystified by this behavior… …

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zombie

Closure Does Not Exist

I got a really nice letter from a really nice reader “Chump Chap.” He wrote to me after he realized that he’d just gotten a …

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hate me

Dear Chump Lady, Why does he hate me?

Hi Chump Lady, My ex cheated with Schmoopie, up-ed and left what I thought was the perfect life, home, and family, to move three hours …

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Dear Chump Lady, My husband is having an emotional affair with his HS girlfriend

Dear Chump Lady, I uncovered an emotional affair my husband was having that started before we began dating. They were “the ones who got away” …

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Serial cheater

Dear Chump Lady, We had a good life. Why did he cheat?

Dear Chump Lady, I come to you as perplexed and heartbroken. When you think about how many people experience this kind of betrayal, it is …

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Dear Chump Lady, He divorced me because we don’t have “chemistry”

Dear Chump Lady, I have only been with one person my entire life, we were each other’s first. We both met when we were 20, …

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Dear Chump Lady, How long do you think this affair was going on?

Dear Chump Lady, My husband of 6 years (together for 10) left me and our (then) 6-month-old son 8 months ago. He said he hadn’t …

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Dear Chump Lady, Why does he suck at remorse?

Dear Chump Lady, Why does he suck at showing remorse? I know what you’re going to say… “HE DOESN’T HAVE ANY,” and maybe that’s true, …

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Dear Chump Lady, What if he changes for the next woman?

Dear Chump Lady, I called off my wedding three months before the big day, after discovering that my fiance was sleeping around with multiple women, including his …

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Dear Chump Lady, Are affairs addictions?

Dear Chump Lady, Is an affair an addiction? I realize the futility of trying to explain my STBX’s behavior, but still would like to know …

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Dear Chump Lady, How do I get over losing the dream?

Dear Chump Lady, It’s been 2 weeks since I found out I was a chump. After 7 years together, 1.5 in marriage my husband stated …

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Dear Chump Lady, Which came first — the death of the marriage or the affair?

Dear Chump Lady, I spend a lot of time thinking about the chicken and egg question — which  came first, the death of the marriage or the affair? …

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Toxic Shame — Or Just Being a Jerk?

On yesterday’s “Enough Divorce Shame” post, UniquelyMe posted a quote from Brene Brown: For those who find out I am divorced and judge me, I …

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Searching for Meaning in Ambiguity

This evening someone left a comment on “Affairs Are Exuberant Acts of Defiance“, my riff on the idiotic essay Esther Perel wrote on infidelity. “Stephanie” writes: …

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