Hi Chump Lady! On this day, seven years ago, my divorce became final. After the judge proclaimed it officially done, I sat in my car in the courthouse parking lot and wailed as if my soul were being ripped from my body. A 25 year marriage legally erased. On the other side of a vast […]
A Masterclass in Boundaries
I confess I’ve got a thing for the HGTV show “Love It or List It.” It completely appeals to my chumpy, codependent senses — you take a hideous pile, see the potential, and then transform it into something beautiful and worthwhile. Of course, this sort of transmogrification never works on humans. (Seriously, don’t fall for […]
Bye-Bye, Cheater
Dear Chump Lady, Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Why? Because reading your words and reading the words of others have finally given me the kick in the ass that I needed. I’ve been married for 2.5 years — second marriage — and it’s been one thing after another. We separated after a year of […]
The Walls in Your House Will Sing
My Aunt J’s birthday is next week and I thought it was time to rerun her story. She gave Chump Nation the powerful line: “The walls in your house will sing.” She wrote this for the blog six years ago. Since then her husband has developed dementia and she takes care of him 24/7. Not […]
Fear, You Don’t Own Me
We answered a letter from Trapped this week, afraid to leave her cheating husband, and a lot of the wonderful, supportive comments from CN were about overcoming fear — that giant wall of pain that stops chumps in their tracks. GO NO FURTHER OR I WILL DESTROY YOU! says the wall. Mighty chumps go forward […]
Tales from the “Gain a Life” Side?
Dear Chump Lady, First of all I have to say thank you to everyone in CN for all the support and for sharing their experiences, and to you for saying it straight and the jolts of reality we get from you. My story isn’t all that different from the others, but I did indeed make […]
Profiles in Mightiness
Did anyone get a load of the testimony in Michigan this week against creepy prolific pedophile USA Gymnastics doctor Larry Nassar? What’s this have to do with infidelity, Tracy? Mightiness, CN, mightiness. All hail Kyle Stephens. This poor kid was abused by Nassar, not believed by her parents, called a liar by everyone close to her, […]
Tuesday Is Coming
I had such an inspiring day yesterday, and it was a Tuesday, of course! If you’re wondering about the significance of Tuesday, it’s a buzzword here. People often ask me, “When does the pain stop?” and I tell them “Tuesday.” I don’t know which Tuesday, I only know that your Tuesday is out there. Tuesday […]
Be a Hell Raiser, Not a Chump
Today, in honor of Labor Day weekend, I’m rerunning this column about Mother Jones. Happy Labor Day and see you back on Tuesday! — Tracy I’m struck by how often the catalyst for an extraordinary life is loss. A friend of mine posts various nuggets of history on Facebook and the other day she featured […]
You Get Over It – A Chump Story
Today’s column is a guest post from Rarity — who left a cheater, and gained a life. Enjoy! — Tracy My husband effectively abandoned me for another woman when I was pregnant with our second. Our 7-year-old was disabled (22q deletion syndrome) and I was trying to finish a master’s degree. I hadn’t worked full-time since […]
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