Chumpy hearts die hard. Armed with the smallest evidence that a freak still cares, a chump will assign great significance to scraps. HE CALLED (to ask that I pick up his dry-cleaning.) HE RETURNED (to get his kayak). SHE WANTS ME (can I babysit tonight?) Sigh. It’s what makes us chumps — idiotically ascribing decent […]
What Happens to Couple Friends After Divorce?
Dear Chump Lady, I am 6 months post divorce after discovering my ex-wife’s infidelity in September 2013. This holiday season my children (12, 8) are with my ex-wife abroad with her affair partner on holiday with my ex in-laws. It sucks that my kids spend time with the man that helped break up my family […]
A Gain a Life Update… and Some Schmoopie Karma
You might recall a UBT from last May, when the OW sent our chump a Mother’s Day card, admonishing her to be best. Civility is for the children! That was a chuckle. Well, the other day on Facebook, our intrepid chump, Debbie, posted an update to her story, and tagged me. With Debbie’s permission, I’m […]
UBT: How Do I Get My Gay Cheating Husband to Reconcile?
Dear Chump Lady, Thank you for saving my life. I was suicidal when I read your posts and they knocked me back into reality. I will be eternally grateful. I am severely codependent and I’m trying to work on myself, but still struggling. I would appreciate it if you put his reasons through the Universal […]
‘Why Do Reconciliation Bloggers Annoy Me?’
Dearest Chump Lady, Why does the Reconciliation Industrial Complex annoy me so much? I don’t want to name any names, but while looking for support groups, I come across a Twitter of an infidelity survivor who has done podcasts, books, you name it. After some research I find out it’s only been two years. The […]
Old Crazy? New Tradition!
Post-Thanksgiving, I thought it might be fun to compare Old Holiday Dysfunction with New Holiday Tradition. Don’t have any new traditions? Make some up! For example: Old Holiday Dysfunction (OHD) — Your drunk father-in-law rails on about One World Order conspiracies while his wife passive aggressively refuses to acknowledge your casserole. “Oh, I must’ve forgotten those roasted […]
Chump Lady Gratitude Turkey Day Recipe Swap
Happy Thanksgiving, CN! I imagine most of us today in the U.S. are having small holidays gatherings or no gatherings at all because of the lockdown. If this is your first holiday post-fuckwit, sending you socially distance-y (((hugs))) of support. Hope you’re doing something nice for yourself today. Like enjoy all the pumpkin pie for […]
‘I Feel Trapped’
Dear Chump Lady, I need to vent. I have no one to talk to and I feel trapped. I can’t talk to friends or family because he’s a decent father but not so much as a husband. So…about 7 years ago I found out my husband went to those “happy ending” massage places for about […]
Ex-Wife Wants Old VHS Tapes for Christmas
Dear Chump Lady, I have been divorced for 4 years now after going through an ugly divorce complete with 2 years of doing the pick me dance. We were together for 25 years with the last few years legally married (same sex marriage). My ex was having an affair and ultimately ended up moving in […]
Controlling the Narrative
Dear Chump Lady, My now soon-to-be-ex husband of almost 30 years cheated on me twice — that I know of. The first one and the current one were/are full-blown long-term affairs. I’m heartbroken, but doing my best. I divorced him after the first affair, took him back, and gladly remarried him upon his request. I […]
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