Author: Chump Lady


Hulu’s Candy: Twu Wuv and Axe Murder

Here’s a nightmare: Your best friend is screwing your husband. And then she kills you with an axe. Not only does she get away with …

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Is She Cheating Because She’s Bipolar?

Dear Chump Lady, My wife started hooking up with other men in 2018. After a brief trip back to her home in Asia she came …

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How to Tolerate Ex in Close Proximity

Dear Chump Lady, I’m writing in hopes of finding some fresh advice. Quick backstory: My story is the same old, same old. Multiple D-days, lots …

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The Long Arc of Sane Parenting

When my son was in the first grade, his teacher, Mrs. Pruneprattle (not her real name) at Tuckahoe Elementary School in Arlington, Virginia told me …

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cheater manifesto

What Did You Want to Send But Didn’t?

You know you wanted to send it. The dating profiles to Schmoopie. An improving article to the unicorn you were imagining. My book… perhaps sent …

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My Ex Wants to Live in My Basement

Dear Chump Lady, My husband of 28 years gave me the speech 5 years ago.  He loved me, but was not in love with me, …

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Mindfuck blender

UBT: ‘They are all deep connections with different colors’

Hi Chump Lady, I read your book right after D-Day, lying on the floor, to stop myself from feeling like I’m falling. At the time, …

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not a unicorn

Will He Commit After the Baby Is Born?

Hi Chump Lady, My soon-to-be-ex started acting distant mid-March (2022) and moved to a spare bedroom. Two weeks later I discovered his affair: He was …

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bad choices

Would You Tell a Dying Woman She’s a Chump?

Here’s a hard question: Would you tell a dying person they’re a chump? (Yes, Mondays are improved by a Hobson’s choice for breakfast.) This was …

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Happy Mother’s Day!

Happy Mother’s Day everyone! Greetings from Chez Chump, where we’re still unpacking boxes and Mr. CL is unfortunately under the weather. But my son is …

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using that word

Euphemisms for Cheating?

Deception can lead to some pretty great, inadvertent euphemisms. Mark Sanford’s “Hiking the Appalachian Trail” comes to mind. Your Friday Challenge is to share your …

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Bill Gates Has a Sadz About His Divorce

Isn’t it regrettable when nebulous clouds of divorce just descend upon innocents? Microsoft founder Bill Gates is one such sad case. In an interview with …

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Are You Sure It’s Not My Fault?

Dear Chump Lady, I stumbled upon your blog and subsequently your book after two D-days that unearthed three affairs over a six-year period. I’m currently …

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When Soul Mates Go Splat

Leave it to me to miss the snark event of the season. (I’ve been moving house.) Several alert readers sent me the travails of life …

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The OW Left Him and I Don’t Know How I Feel

Dear Chump Lady, Will you please help me identify a new feeling of mine? Meh-be it’s meh but I don’t know!!! Yesterday (a Tuesday) I …

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gym cheater

Stupidest Lie You Bought?

To be chumped is to be lied to. There are fibs, but then there are whoppers. Like the cheater who refused to wear his wedding …

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Universal Bullshit Translator

UBT: ‘Sorry I Was So Lame’

Dear Chump Lady, I thought I had reached meh 3 1/2 years after D-Day till I received this email from FW the other day: blah …

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My Friend Won’t Listen to Your Advice

Dear Chump Lady, My friend reads your blog, but doesn’t take your advice. I (and several other friends) have coached her through the hurts and …

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The Other Woman Died

Dear Chump Lady, My ex husband left me and our 3 kids almost 9 years ago, after 17 years of marriage, and never looked back. …

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What If I’m Never Meh?

Dear Chump Lady, I know that meh is the prize at the end of the rainbow for us chumps, but what if you’re not the …

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