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UBT: The Apology That Never Came

January 4, 2021 by Chump Lady

Hopium

Hello Chump Lady! I’ve got a fine bit of BS here and I’d like to see what you think. Brief background: My ex-wife had an affair with her boss, assumed it was going somewhere, and divorced my chump-ass without a lick of remorse. Last year, about 2 years later, their relationship ended. Still high on […]

Filed Under: Cake Eating, Hopium Tagged With: cake eating, Genuine Imitation Naugahyde Remorse, Hopium, reconciliation, Remorse, Universal Bullshit Translator

Your Long, Strange Hopium Trips

December 4, 2020 by Chump Lady

Hopium

Chumpy hearts die hard. Armed with the smallest evidence that a freak still cares, a chump will assign great significance to scraps. HE CALLED (to ask that I pick up his dry-cleaning.) HE RETURNED (to get his kayak). SHE WANTS ME (can I babysit tonight?) Sigh. It’s what makes us chumps — idiotically ascribing decent […]

Filed Under: Hopium Tagged With: Hopium

Chump Won’t Stop Doing Her Ex Favors

August 24, 2020 by Chump Lady

Hopium

Hello, Chump Lady. I am hoping that you and Chump Nation can help me help a chump. My cousin, who is like a sister to me, was with a loser for over a decade and finally married him a couple of years ago. Less than six months after they were married, he was fucking strange. […]

Filed Under: Hopium, No contact, Untangling the skein of fuckupedness Tagged With: Hopium

Discovered CN by Googling ‘I Hate Esther Perel’

August 18, 2020 by Chump Lady

Hopium

Dear Chump Lady, I’ve only very recently stumbled on your blog (actually, last night at 2 AM, and I’ve read about a hundred posts so far!). I wonder if you can help. I could really use the help, because I’ve let myself become nuts. I was recently left by my (ex-)partner, for nobody in particular. […]

Filed Under: Hopium, Pick me dance Tagged With: esther perel, Hopium, Trust That They Suck

‘Other Chumps Infuriate Me’

April 13, 2020 by Chump Lady

Dear Chump Lady, I was cheated on years ago. It was a horrible, messy, painful two years. I wish I’d had your book back then to save me the heartbreak. I’m mostly over it, except for one thing. Every time I hear a chump making the same excuses I used to make, I get absolutely […]

Filed Under: Chumps Decoded, Hopium Tagged With: Anger, Hopium

Sparkles The Magnificent Dry Drunk Unicorn

April 2, 2020 by Chump Lady

Dear Chump Lady, I am currently in limbo while I get the finances in order and fully decide what I will do. He wants to reconcile but I am leaning toward breaking up because after what he’s done I don’t think I will ever trust and love him the way I want to be able […]

Filed Under: Trust that they suck Tagged With: Hopium

Should I Give Him a Fourth Chance?

March 5, 2020 by Chump Lady

Hopium

Dear Chump Lady, I stumbled upon your blog after my husband cheated on me for the third time, and then left me shortly after our second child got home from the NICU. So firstly, thank you. Reading all of your articles got me through the first couple of dark months. I’m writing you because my […]

Filed Under: Hopium, Trust that they suck Tagged With: Hopium, too many chances

This Is Your Brain on Hopium

December 27, 2019 by Chump Lady

Hopium is a powerful drug. You can hand a chump the most desperate set of circumstances, and goddamn it, that chump will work with it. Let’s just give it a year! I owe it to us to try! Sure, I can ionize my needs into tiny, undetectable particles! You’ll never get a whiff of my anger, […]

Filed Under: Hopium, Spackle Tagged With: Hopium

Hope versus Hopium

October 25, 2019 by Chump Lady

Hopium

I wrote once that chumps need to “bludgeon hope with a fencepost and operate with total lucidity.” Which doesn’t sound exactly hope friendly. But I wanted to set the record straight today that I’m not against hope. It’s all about where you direct it. Are you going to bet on yourself or are you going […]

Filed Under: Hopium Tagged With: Believe in yourself, Hope, Hopium

Dear Chump Lady, I can’t kick hope

October 16, 2019 by Chump Lady

Hopium

Dear Chump Lady, First I want to say I am so glad I found your site, it is beginning to counteract the damage all the “save your marriage” sites have caused me. Thanks for exposing me to harsh realities. I wish I would have found this site in the beginning. I am still in the […]

Filed Under: Cake Eating, Hopium, How to leave a cheater, Trust that they suck Tagged With: Hopium, How to leave a cheater

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