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We Reconciled… He Cheated Again

February 16, 2021 by Chump Lady

The Unicorn of Reconciliation

Hi Chump Lady, I just finished your book… For the second time. Two years ago I found out he had an affair with a 20-something from work. (He was 56 at the time). We were married for 30 years at the time, and, things were great. We traveled, socialized, and had great sex. I thought […]

Filed Under: Reconciliation, Sex addiction Tagged With: reconciliation, Reconciliation Industrial Complex, Sex addiction

My New Husband Is a ‘Sex Addict’

October 19, 2020 by Chump Lady

broken heart

Hi Chump Lady, I’ve recently discovered my partner of 5 years and brand new husband is a sex addict. He has cheated on me in massage parlours and with escorts numerous times, and cheated on his ex-wife 20+ times (she didn’t know. I found the email trail. He’d been writing fucking REVIEWS of them!!) Once […]

Filed Under: Gain a life, Sex addiction Tagged With: Sex addiction

He sees prostitutes. She’s ‘stuck in a fog’.

October 15, 2020 by Chump Lady

Dear Chump Lady I’ve been in an over 40-year marriage in which I’ve invested a lot of emotional equity. My husband was unfaithful from the very start of when I meet him. I knew and should have run then but…..in my fairy tale mind, I thought I could change him. I thought my pure and […]

Filed Under: Limbo, Sex addiction, Trust that they suck Tagged With: Sex addiction, Sex workers, Trust That They Suck

Nearly Engaged…Then Busted

September 29, 2020 by Chump Lady

Voodoo doll

Hi Chump Lady, Hoping to get some perspective from an outside source instead of having my friends and family in my ears (all of which five different advice). The greatest man I have ever met has been living with me for 3.5 years, being together 4.5 years in total. We just went ring browsing last […]

Filed Under: Trust that they suck Tagged With: Sex addiction, Trust That They Suck

Dear Chump Lady, My Wife Is Near Perfect But I See Prostitutes

July 23, 2020 by Chump Lady

Hi Chump Lady, I happened upon your website and it seems to contain a lot of good advice for certain circumstances. But there are others, I think, where the main advice of “just leave” doesn’t apply. See, I’m a cheater and never expected I would be. I married my near perfect wife, a wonderful human […]

Filed Under: Character disorder, Cheater Tactics, Trust that they suck Tagged With: Prostitution, Sex addiction

Interview with Dr. David Ley, ‘The Myth of Sex Addiction’ author

December 3, 2019 by Chump Lady

Anyone dealing with a “sex addict”? I thought this interview with Dr. David Ley, the major debunker of sex addiction, was worth a rerun. My advice stands — whatever flavor of fucked up you call it — please get away from it. *** Today we’re speaking with Dr. David Ley, a clinical psychologist and author […]

Filed Under: Sex addiction Tagged With: David Ley, Sex addiction, The Myth of Sex Addiction

When ‘Sex Addiction’ Turns Deadly

October 15, 2019 by Chump Lady

broken heart

Dear Chump Lady, I have been an avid reader of Chumplady.com for the last 16 months. After marrying my soon to be erstwhile husband, I discovered just at our one-year anniversary, six weeks after the purchase of our home, that he had been engaging in multiples affairs, hookers, match.com dates, well, you know the story. […]

Filed Under: Sex addiction, Sociopathy Tagged With: Sex addiction, Suicide

UBT the Trust Bank

July 31, 2019 by Chump Lady

CN, why haven’t we deconstructed the bullshit trope of the Trust Bank yet? OMG, I’ve let you down! Recently, I got a letter that went like this: Two years into the relationship he left his email open and I found the Craigslist ads, dating site profiles, etc…, but he eagerly agreed to couples counseling and […]

Filed Under: euphemisms, False reconciliation, Quacks, Reconciliation, Sex addiction, universal bullshit translator Tagged With: Sex addiction, Trust, Trust Bank, Universal Bullshit Translator

Dear Chump Lady, He claims he still loves me

June 6, 2019 by Chump Lady

Untangling the skein of fuckupedness

Dear Chump Lady, You may have addressed this in the past. I’m leaving a partner of 43 years whom I’ve learned has been visiting prostitutes for years while claiming to still have loved me the entire time. Just writing that gives me a clue, however I would still value your feedback. Bonnie Dear Bonnie, I […]

Filed Under: Sex addiction, Untangling the skein of fuckupedness Tagged With: Prostitution, Sex addiction

Forgiving the ‘Sex Addict’

March 12, 2019 by Chump Lady

Whenever I think I’ve overstated the pernicious ubiquity of The Reconciliation Industrial Complex (RIC), something pops up on my news feed and gobsmacks me all over again. No. I’m not imagining it. There really is this fucked up societal message — and literal industry — insisting that chumps not just forgive, but reconcile with their […]

Filed Under: Forgiveness, Reconciliation, Sex addiction Tagged With: Sex addiction

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