Glossary of terms
Amazon chump | the state of chumpdom where you read everything on Amazon about infidelity |
bitch cookie | the reward you demand for doing something you should do anyway, i.e., “You didn’t clean out the ENTIRE 401K? Great. Want a bitch cookie?” |
boundaries | what you will and will not put up with |
cake | having the spouse and the affair |
Cluster B | a series of personality disorders on the Borderline/Narcissist/Sociopath spectrum |
D-Day | discovery day (the day you discovered the affair) |
Fuckwit | a vulgarity used for cheater, expressed as FW (to avoid censors) |
hopium | the hallucinogenic drug of hope that make you see potential and good outcomes where none exist |
Meh | The state of acceptance when you don’t care about your cheater |
narc or nark | a narcissist |
narkles | narcissist sparkles |
no contact | refusing to engage with the cheater |
pick me dance | Vying for the attention of the cheater, triangulation between the chump, the cheater, and the affair partner |
Reconciliation Industrial Complex | the vague conspiracy sense that religious and for-profit institutions want you to try to reconcile indefinitely |
shit sandwich | The crappy situation you must choke down |
skein | the skein of fuckupedness, their issues |
spackle | covering up, the lies we tell ourselves when someone is behaving badly |
sparkle | The charisma of a narcissist or Cluster B type |
sparkly turd | A narcissist, someone who appears to sparkle, but has turd at the core |
Tuesday | When the pain stops |
Unicorn | an unlikely thing, usually referring to reconciliation |
untangling the skein of fuckupedness | wasting time trying to figure them out |
Acronym list
AP | affair partner |
BP | Borderline Personality or bipolar |
BS | betrayed spouse or bullshit |
BTW | by the way |
CL | Chump Lady |
D-Day | discovery day (the day you discovered the affair) |
DD | darling daughter |
DS | darling son |
FOO | family of origin |
FW | fuckwit |
FWIW | for what it’s worth |
ILYBINILWY | I love you but I’m not in love with you |
IMHO | in my humble opinion |
IMO | in my opinion |
LTA | long-term affair |
NPD | Narcissistic Personality Disorder |
OM | other man |
OTOH | on the other hand |
OW | other woman |
RIC | Reconciliation Industrial Complex |
STBX | soon-to-be ex |
WS | wayward spouse |
YMBAC | you might be a chump… |