🎵 It’s the most vulnerable time of the year! 🎵
Time for a public service announcement about holiday hoovering.
Has your ex gone all misty?
Does she need a Plan B/plus-one/last-minute babysitter?
Did Schmoopie stand him up for the office party and you’ll do?
Does someone need a payday loan?
Won’t you have him over to open presents with the kids and cook him breakfast and clean up afterwards, for old-time sake — or are you bitter?
Holiday hoovering! During this busy holiday seasons, toxic exes Need Things. Your time. Your understanding. Sex. Schedule changes. Friendship! That Christmas carol made him think of you (and you… and you… and you…) and gee, it’s cold out here. Couldn’t he come in? Warm himself up by the glow of your chumpiness?
IT’S A TRAP, PEOPLE.
Have boundaries. Be civil, be reasonable, but for the love of God, don’t break no contact or gray rock over the holidays. Don’t be sentimental — be different. Stronger, more resilient. Less inclined to let fuckwits take advantage of your good nature. Don’t pet sit for your ex. Don’t be the Backup Plan. Don’t follow their holiday parties on Instagram. You’re very, very busy with your new life, okay?
Your Friday Challenge is to tell CN what you’re doing instead of breaking no contact/gray rock between now and New Year’s. Netflix? Leftover pie? Writing postcards to veterans?