Glossary of terms

Amazon chump the state of chumpdom where you read everything on Amazon about infidelity
bitch cookie the reward you demand for doing something you should do anyway, i.e., “You didn’t clean out the ENTIRE 401K? Great. Want a bitch cookie?”
boundaries what you will and will not put up with
cake having the spouse and the affair
Cluster B a series of personality disorders on the Borderline/Narcissist/Sociopath spectrum
D-Day discovery day (the day you discovered the affair)
Fuckwit a vulgarity used for cheater, expressed as FW (to avoid censors)
hopium the hallucinogenic drug of hope that make you see potential and good outcomes where none exist
Meh The state of acceptance when you don’t care about your cheater
narc or nark a narcissist
narkles narcissist sparkles
no contact refusing to engage with the cheater
pick me dance Vying for the attention of the cheater, triangulation between the chump, the cheater, and the affair partner
Reconciliation Industrial Complex the vague conspiracy sense that religious and for-profit institutions want you to try to reconcile indefinitely
shit sandwich The crappy situation you must choke down
skein the skein of fuckupedness, their issues
spackle covering up, the lies we tell ourselves when someone is behaving badly
sparkle The charisma of a narcissist or Cluster B type
sparkly turd A narcissist, someone who appears to sparkle, but has turd at the core
Tuesday When the pain stops
Unicorn an unlikely thing, usually referring to reconciliation
untangling the skein of fuckupedness wasting time trying to figure them out


Acronym list

AP affair partner
BP Borderline Personality or bipolar
BS betrayed spouse or bullshit
BTW by the way
CL Chump Lady
D-Day discovery day (the day you discovered the affair)
DD darling daughter
DS darling son
FOO family of origin
FW fuckwit
FWIW for what it’s worth
ILYBINILWY I love you but I’m not in love with you
IMHO in my humble opinion
IMO in my opinion
LTA long-term affair
NPD Narcissistic Personality Disorder
OM other man
OTOH on the other hand
OW other woman
RIC Reconciliation Industrial Complex
STBX soon-to-be ex
WS wayward spouse
YMBAC you might be a chump…