Recent Posts

Dear Chump Lady, Should I confront the affair partner?

Dear Chump Lady, I found out about 6 months ago that my husband was having an emotional affair with my cousin. (He denies a sexual relationship.) The affair went on approximately four years. I was told they played pool together and met for dinner. Due to his affair with the whore, I had a breakdown […]

Tuesday Is Coming

I had such an inspiring day yesterday, and it was a Tuesday, of course! If you’re wondering about the significance of Tuesday, it’s a buzzword here. People often ask me, “When does the pain stop?” and I tell them “Tuesday.” I don’t know which Tuesday, I only know that your Tuesday is out there. Tuesday […]

UBT: I’m a Real Silly Bunny

Hello Chump Lady, I’m hoping you may be able to advise me please? I feel so guilty for telling his wife as well as betraying his trust. I spent 18 months falling for the oldest tricks in the book with Mr Cheater, ‘flatmates with the wife’ he said, ‘divorce being sorted’, ‘poor me, the wife […]

How Can We Challenge Blameshifting Therapists?

Dear Chump Lady, I find myself truly saddened, perplexed, outraged, confused? Am I going crazy? or is this really the philosophy around infidelity and how can we possibly challenge it when it’s so ingrained? Recently I picked up a book (2015) by people I greatly admire Julie and John Gottman “10 Principles for Doing Effective […]

Chump Lady Is Coming to Australia!

When I started this blog, I never imagined I would hear from chumps around the world. Heck, in the early days, I didn’t realize the insanity went much past my own cheater, let alone across continents of fuckwits worldwide. Turns out, chumpdom is a common condition. People have written to ask if they could translate […]

New Script for Betrayed Political Wives?

Chumped wives in the media. It’s never pretty, is it? If they’re even in focus, that is. Bit players to their husband’s malfeasance. Hanging in there, standing by their man, issuing media “we” statements… (How did you get ownership of this, chump? Dude can’t even use a singular possessive pronoun?) I don’t envy anyone suffering […]

UBT: In Defense of Dating a Married Man

So here’s some MSN clickbait just begging to be Universal Bullshit Translator-ed this morning. A fluffy little piece of sociopathy by Shannon Boodram, sexologist, entitled “In Defense of Dating a Married Man.” I often get emails from women involved with a married man or from men who are engaged in an affair that usually center […]

Dear Chump Lady, I discovered a Switzerland Sister

Dear Chump Lady, I’ve recently discovered my sister is back in touch with my ex husband – following each other on Social Media and WhatsApp messaging and birthday cards have been exchanged.  I have had this information for a while, but it came to a head and I couldn’t bottle in anymore that this really […]