Recent Posts

Not Your Job Anymore

Newly liberated chumps often struggle with freedom. It seems a crazy thing to write — Freedom? I LOVE FREEDOM! — what’s not to love? But a lot of gaining a life is realizing that “chump” is no longer in your job description. What now fills the place where an entitled, impossible-to-please fuckwit used to stand? […]

Kids and Affair Partner(s). The Unavoidable Shit Sandwich.

How do I protect my kids from my spouse’s affair partner(s)? How do I shield my kids deal from this new blended family that’s been inflicted on them? And…Hell, we’re not even divorced, and he’s introducing the kids to my replacement. What can I do? I get these questions a lot. And I have the […]

The Fallacy of “Unmet Needs”

If I could wave my magic Chump Lady wand and rid the world of one founding principle of the Reconciliation Industrial Complex, it’s that affairs happen because of “unmet needs.” (I know, as long as I’m waving my magic wand, why not go all the way and rid the world of the RIC itself? POOF! ) The […]

Dear Chump Lady, Why do I have to pay her when she cheated?

Dear Chump Lady, I have been in a nightmare for 6 months, my wife told me that she had feelings for someone else. She told me this with a grin on her face no remorse, except the occasional “It just happened.” By the way, we made love the same night, she waited till the morning to […]

Abuse Goes with Substance Abuse

The good people at reached out to me to ask if I would spread the public service announcement message that domestic abuse goes hand in hand with substance abuse. Many in Chump Nation are dealing with cheaters who are also addicts, and/or physically abusive. Also, many people respond to abuse (including our kids) by self-medicating […]

Best Sassy Chump Retorts?

Well chumps, I’ve devoted lot of blog pages to Stupid Shit Cheaters Say. And as we all know, they say some really stupid shit. You didn’t cheat, you just cheated on my belief that you would not cheat on me? WTF? The Other Woman is really nice and would like to babysit for us? She […]

Dear Chump Lady, I don’t stand a chance dating

Dear Chump Lady, I fear I will always be a chump. Text today to and from girlfriend about her co-worker: JAD: I’m sorry you have to hear people’s sad stories at work sometimes. GF: Usually I will vent to Pete or Amanda and I will feel better. JAD: Is Pete the one that calls me […]