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Queen Camilla Dropped the ‘Consort’


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The invitation design for King Charles’ coronation was revealed yesterday and some commentators noticed that Camilla elevated her rank as “Queen Camilla” dispensing with “Consort.” Which is old English for slut bucket. Or was it Middle English?

Anyway, the point is, Camilla’s a thirsty side chick and like every wifetress, she longs for legitimacy. The kind that can only be had with engraved invitations, royal diadems, and Handel’s Zadok the Priest.

Is this any different than OW insisting your kids call her “Mommy”? Or your 50-year-old adulterous ex-wife marrying her affair partner and wearing white? That withered bosom bulging out of some polyester confection with a hoop skirt. It’s her shining moment!

But is anyone buying it, really? Your kids know who their mom is. And bridal gowns… you can dress the mutton, but it’s never lamb. It’s just a very poorly dressed sheep.

And so, Camilla. Are we surprised that she’s grabby? To be an affair partner is to believe in your exceptionalism. Charles is a very special tampon indeed.

Nothing screams insecurity more than wearing coordinated outfits. This is what teenagers do at the prom. I wonder if on Coronation Day Charles’ boutonniere will match Camilla’s corsage.

It just all seems a bit staged. Could it be that Camilla isn’t a shy violet? LaineyGossip comments:

Camilla’s not just standing around letting people plan sh-t around her…although that’s the narrative they’ve encouraged over the last 20+ years. During these decades of Camilla rehab, leading up to their eventual marriage and afterwards, the story has always been that this was always and only about love. That these two were impossibly and sometimes tragically in love. That circumstance tore them apart and that they’d finally earned their happy ending. In this story Camilla was recast as the ever-loyal companion, the perfect complement to Charles’s temperament, his ideal partner, the woman who always put him first, who never wanted to be in the spotlight, she led with love, content to stay behind him, content to just be in his life, with no designs of her own, happy to stay back with the horses and ride and garden. Basically they rewrote the character and eliminated the THIRST.

And now?

Now she’s not just no longer a consort but she’s splashing her side chick DNA all over the coronation. There is more side chick offspring in the coronation than actual royal offspring. What happened to the version of Camilla who was content to just be in Charles’s life? What happened to the revisionist fairy tale that Camilla had no ambitions beyond just being his wife? And we’re supposed to believe she wasn’t calculating this all along?

Oh of course she was calculating it.

Cloaking oneself in the trappings of Legitimacy over Illegitimacy is what FWs do. But isn’t that the whole point of a CORONATION CEREMONY? I mean, it’s 2023. Do we still believe in Kings and Queens? That they’re ordained by God, and have some authority beyond being the inbred descendants of feudal sociopaths?

Yes, but they’re VERY wealthy, Tracy.

Well, so is Jeff Bezos. Can you imagine having to curtesy at him? Or call him silly names?

Let Camilla call herself a Queen. She’s not a queen.

THIS is a Queen.

And THIS is a Queen.


Camilla can call herself a turkey sandwich. Doesn’t make her one. In my universe, you only get to be a queen if you’re truly exceptional, because you EARNED it. Because your talent is so otherworldly people can’t help but worship you. Look at this woman!

I would absolutely build Aretha Franklin a shrine.


No way.

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  • Well said. Charles is also complicit in trying to elevate his side chick over the woman he did wrong: Diana. I’m sure this is reason why his son, Harry feels no loyalty towards him. Consequences, Charles, consequences. Of course, Charles doesn’t connect the dots. Even if he does, like any narcissistic cheater, he puts the good of himself over his children. And coronations, barf 🤮

  • But of course.

    Entitlement. It flows strong in her veins.

  • The population outside London is not buying this whatever the invitations say and the newspapers print. Charles gets to be royal by birth, Camilla gets politeness to her face in the unlikely event our paths cross, but really should have settled for Queen consort. Her kids can just naff right orf out of participation in official events beyond sitting with other invitees.

    • Ooohh, I learned (thanks to Google) a new British insult! Thanks, Name Changer.

      My first thought on seeing the invitation was that, in order to quite literally get top billing, Camilla needed to drop the word “consort.”. How else could they fit her name on the same line as King Charles III?

    • What is shocking (I know, I’m still shocked by these selfish FWs) is she’s prominently including all her grandchildren in the ceremony.

      There will be more Parker Bowles’ than Windsors.

      And her son, Charles’ godson, is a raging alcholic drug addict. What a mess.

  • The Royal Family….

    One fucked up family.

    I’ll get a day off work. I’ll be in the garden pulling up weeds from the vegetable patch 😁

    • I m flying to England from Australia ….coming all that way a week before…..and no way in hell am I going to see that ….never liked her or him for that matter! …..we will probably go see Scotland lol

    • I’m usually an atheist but not when I hear Aretha, Celine, or Barbra sing.

    • Aretha really is a natural woman. No one can possibly keep their singing voice to that age if they ever took a false breath. According to famous Julliard voice coach Kristen Linklater, women who hyperfeminize or otherwise manipulate their voices to seem more twee or sexy or whatever will sound like they’re gargling gravel by 50.

  • As an American I’m completely “ick” about anything “royal”. It’s all just gross. I’m more into “All (wo)men are created equal”. There’s a reason Diana called her “The Rottweiler”. She’s just ghastly and Chuck deserves her.

  • “Camilla elevated her rank as “Queen Camilla” dispensing with “Consort.” Which is old English for slut bucket. Or was it Middle English?”

    So many spit-out-coffee lines this am. Thanks CL!!! 🤣

        • Thanks for this!!! I was so upset when I saw the invitation last night. Feels like the whores always win, BUT then again too much inbreeding over there, they are second cousins!

          • Oops…I meant distant cousins…rumours that Edward VII (Charles great great grandfather) was the father of Sonia, Alice Keppels 2nd daughter. Alice was his mistress and Camilla’s great grandmother.

  • I love your comments, but……I want to point out one teeny-tiny little mis-statement:

    “Sure, there other tampons in the box, but she is a very special tampon.”

    No – – she is not the tampon. HE is. (What he said was that it would just be his luck to come back as a tampon.) (paraphrasing here)

    His Majesty Charles the Third, Tampon the First, of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland and of His other Realms and Territories King, Head of the Commonwealth, Defender of the Faith, and Sovereign of the Most Noble Order of the Garter.

    • Edited accordingly! My mind must’ve froze — too eww to contemplate.

    • Whenever I say King Charles, I feel like continuing with King Charles Spaniel.

      • I’ve had the immense pleasure of being pet parent to two King Charles Spaniels and he doesn’t deserve the title. They are loyal to the end and he is a POS cheater. I would name him King Charles CheaterPants FuckWit.

        • They are the BEST. Never had a dog but someone higher up knew what was coming down the pike for me. The summer before DD#2, I got Hanson the WonderDog.

          She saved my life.

    • Me too. My mind tends to wander to “King Charles Spaniel,” which is upsetting because I’m so much of a dog lover. Camilla as a Rotweiler is closer to the money. (Remember the episode when Tony Soprano was figuratively depicted as a Roweiler going after Dr. Melfi’s rapist?) She is arguably the most famous OW of the 20th century.

  • My mother used to watch Dynasty in reruns just for the trainwreck it was. There was one actress that mom said she didn’t like because she just knew she would have bad breath. I feel the same about the queen conslut.

  • The dress Camilla is wearing in the photo above is the same color blue as the suit Diana was wearing in her engagement photo to Charles. Out of any color in the world, she picked a dress in a color from an iconic photo of Diana and Charles you would have to be dead to be unaware of.

    People are fond of saying the late Queen never put a foot wrong. I am sad to say I think she put her foot wrong a lot when it came to raising children.

    • I read somewhere one of the courtiers said once if she’d paid as much attention to raising her children, as she did to breeding her racehorses, the RF wouldn’t be so bloody dysfunctional. He had a point.
      Alas, being a Brit, I fear supporting the RF is in my DNA, so much as I despise the King and Camilla Carthorse as people, I still have an ingrained respect for the monarchy. I just hope he won’t be as long lived as his mother, and William and Catherine will soon be King and Queen.

      • I’m a Brit (in America) and I’ve hated the royal family. Every single one of them. That being said I have immense respect for Harry (and Megan) for literally ✌🏻 (peac’ing out) of this clusterfuck of a family. Complete waste of tax payer money on a bunch of narcissistic privileged dull people. Even Kate gives me the “stepford wife” feeling. I’ve never heard of anything of her other than fashion and “smile and wave”. Parasites.

        • Well, I have zero respect for Harry and his ghastly wife. A pair of hypocritical poseurs who wanted to have their cake and eat it too, and when told that wasn’t an option, flounced off to America in a strop.

          As for the Princess of Wales, she does a great deal of immensely important charitable work, so if you’ve never heard anything of her other than fashion and waving, you haven’t been paying attention.

          • Sorry have to disagree. The princess show up at charity as a patron and does zero “work”. Shaking hands and looking pretty is NOT work.
            At least Megan had a job. For all her so called perceived fault at least she had a career. Marrying into privilege is not a career.
            Zero respect for Kate Middleton.

            • Meghan was 6th on the call list of an American cable drama. Few had heard of her. Then she caught an extremely dim Prince of the British Royal Family, which elevated her to a Duchess, and gave her access to money, fame, and a platform she would never otherwise have had. Isn’t that “marrying into privilege”?

              • None of this is going to make sense to Americans, I’m afraid. The “but they’re royals!!!!!” and “but she’s COMMON!” may resonate to you, but as we like to say, we had a whole dang war over this concept.

              • I am going to have to reply to your remarks about Meghan Markle. I can’t help but see racism. She was a working woman when she met Harry. They actually fell in love with each other and tried their best to become part of the working of the monarchy. They got way too popular and something had to be done so they went after her. Oddly, if you look long enough, you will see she has very devoted friends, people who worked with her and achusband who adores her. There’s not much bad to say about that nice young woman and I’m sick and tired of it.

              • I hate moderating, but I”m taking down the gratuitous attacks on Meghan Markle. Snark about Camilla.

              • Please tell exactly how she grifted, her hypocrisy, and how she lied.
                The monarchy had the best two people in the world to help it move into this century. One, a favorite son, and the other a woman of color. Once they went down under and it was obvious how popular they were the gloves came off behind close doors off various palaces.
                I like the monarchy in spirit because I think it is the glue that holds the country together. I also feel terrible for Kate who is not allowed to put a foot wrong.
                I also feel the US, my home, needs to do something about our own racism.

              • An addenda to what I’ve just said: I don’t deny for one moment that there are racist *individuals* who hate and despise those who are a different colour, those who have epicanthic folds, or any other racial differences, (just for a second, think why it’s always *colour*, rather than other racial markers), but that’s a far cry from labelling an entire *country* as racist.

                The world is full of arseholes, always was, always will be. But it’s stupid to fall into the trap of assuming said arseholes are representative of an entire country.

              • Yes. And I forgot that you folks across the pond outlawed slavery before we Yanks.

              • And why did they name their daughter after her great-grandmother QEII if the royals are so racist ? The unmitigated gall-Elizabeth’s nickname no less, they didn’t ask permission and Elizabeth and Philip never even met the baby. E. and P. were probably heartbroken and hurt to be slighted like that, at the end of their lives.

              • I’m cutting off the Meghan discussion — please keep on topic. Thanks.

              • Something along the lines of another Mayerling incident

              • “6th on the call list of an American cable drama” is still career. And I wonder if you thought Harry was “dim-witted” before he dated and married a biracial American woman

            • I was JUST writing the sane thing and gave up. Waity Katie wanted only to be Queen some day. Meghan had a career, a life and a variety of friends. She was well travelled (on her own dime), curious and truly compassionate. She wasn’t out at photo ops, she was trying to make a difference. People who attack her personally and call her vile names, and presume yo know her – what do they base that on? I just wonder…

              • In all fairness, if you are working from facts you don’t need to know someone personally in order to form an accurate assessment about their character. Conversely, I knew my ex husband personally, was with him for twenty seven years and then discovered some facts which showed me I did not know him at all.

                Much of the world adores St. Oprah.

                I’ll just say my own upsetting personal experience with her is why “civilians” often don’t speak out against a celebrity. You’re the one who gets attacked and demonized while they deflect accountability with the power and protection of their celebrity status. It’s usually assumed that Average Joe or Jane is jealous or deranged or out for money and attention, and the celebrity is a wonderful person.

        • How are they peacing out by screaming to the media and getting as much publicity as possible? LOL South Park totally nailed them. They are absolute attention whores and narcissists. If they wanted their privacy, they’d go off and have it. It’s been years now and they’re still screaming for attention.

      • William does fall far from the rotten apple cheater Charles tree. Google Rose Hansbury. 🤢

        • The Rose Hanbury canard was first put about by Meghan and her ‘friends’, and has long been discredited due to a total lack of evidence.

          • Oh please 🙄 William is a cheater like his father and countless Princes of Wales before him.

      • Do most Brits hope that King Charles has a short lived reign? I agree that William and Catherine would be far better. Imagine if Charles dies soon how pissed The Rottweiler would be! Queen For A Day has a nice ring, no? (I’m not wishing ill on a monarch, but I am wishing ill on a colossal FW.)

        • I don’t know about most Brits, but this one does!

          Queen for 9 Days with a beheading at the end of it has an even better ring!😝

      • Radiant! Did you check out the link? I think that women who show their age are worthy of respect and rank. But when your photo is so doctored as to be barely recognizable there is a problem. But we knew that.

  • Charles had a fortune and a wealth of royal properties at his disposal, yet cheated with Camilla at the homes of his friends, rather than in private. Talk about duper’s delight and a total lack of dignity and decency. Seems like the kind of thing teenagers do–sneak off during a party, find an empty bedroom and have sex on the sly, knowing that everyone knows what they’re doing. Except in this case, the hosts knew exactly what was happening, and chose to aid the cheating. And hide it from the wife. Ugh.

    • That’s what the British aristocracy is like. From everything I’ve ever read, affairs and constant bedhopping is what nearly all of them do. No surprise they’d connive.

      • Corridor creeping at the castles during weekend shooting parties

        • Indeed. It’s a whole mindset and way of life I could never hope to understand. Thank God.

  • A good reminder to stop worrying about karma. Sometimes the OW becomes the Queen. Sometimes the cheater and the mistress “live happily ever after” (by your estimation, or their’s, or their friends’… whatever). I’m not here to quibble about what happily ever after looks like or whether or not their karma is that they have to live with each other forever now or that happily ever after is window dressing, etc.

    I’m saying that for chumps, ledgers don’t always go for karma balance. The FWs sometimes do (seemingly) skip off into the sunset and (seemingly) stay married happily ever after to their APs and (seemingly) live perfect, public-facing, happy family, Instagram lives. Sometimes they even get crowned king and queen. They usually don’t fall into the same pit of despair that the chump does because, as CL noted this week, “they just don’t care; that’s their superpower.”

    This is a good reminder that life is not fair and karma’s ledgers do not always balance (again, not quibbling about what goes on behind closed doors). Chumps, get out there and live your best lives, even if your FW and his AP are taking photos in coordinating outfits. Don’t look, stop hoping for karma, and move on.

    Continue to be a stable parent. Go see that movie. Try being a vegetarian if you’ve always wanted to give it a try. Apply for that course you always wanted to take. Adopt that cat. Take swimming lessons. Whatever you like. You are so free now.

    • Funny you mention this, @Fourleaf.

      Whenever the topic of karma comes up with respect to the Kunty Kibbler and the Chlorine Special (soon to be celebrating their 4th anniversary), I always respond: “The greatest service I could provide for society at large is to do everything in my power to make sure the two of them stay married to and focused on each other for the rest of their lives.”

      Confining that dysfunction and entitlement to their new house a state away, while I’m free to live a life grounded in honesty, self-discipline, knowing my value, and being true to my word? Karma don’t get any better than that.

    • I just wanted to amend one of the things I said: “Don’t look, stop hoping for karma, and move on.” I’m uncomfortable with how that came out because it really hurts/rankles me when folk insist that being cheated on and left by your spouse is something that you can “move on” from like you were called a mean name or some other misdemeanor. To this day, I don’t talk publicly about my abandonment for fear of the “…haven’t you moved on from that yet?” reaction and I didn’t mean to imply that here. I meant “don’t look and move on in that moment.”

      I just really, really, really don’t want to lump myself in with the “adultery is not a big deal and you’re immature if you think it is, you big grudge holder” crowd which is around 80% of the population out there.

      • I understand completely. Being blindsided & abandoned is something from which I’ll never recover completely. How can I? Never had one red flag. My parents were long ago deceased at time of dday. Brother lives 14 time zones away. FW’s family was my family until they weren’t. Vikki Stark, CL/CN and a good therapist keep me keeping on. It’s been a while since I’ve heard the move on phrase but boy does it sting to hear it.

      • I think of it as my happiness (or at least working toward it) doesn’t/shouldn’t depend on some sort of bad karma for FW, such as telling myself that his bad karma is having to be himself. After all, he thinks he’s great, so why would that be bad karma for him? Sometimes, we have to face the fact that things don’t always work out for the best. Sometimes, life really isn’t fair and the bad guy wins. Sometimes a FW really is living a fabulous, truly happy, life without you. In my case, I personally think some negative consequences have befallen FW as it relates to his relationship with our son, but even though they don’t have the best relationship, they still have a relationship, and that’s good enough for FW (even though it wouldn’t be for me). So, FW really did sail off into the sunset free of consequences. He’s wealthy through family money, he didn’t lose his son, he’s in great shape and looks way younger than his age, and he will likely live a very long time since it runs in his family. Hence, my name for him is Teflon. Nothing sticks to him, and it really does suck. But I can’t dwell on that. I have to “move on” in the sense that I can’t make my happiness dependent on his consequences or bad karma because they don’t, and likely never will, exist.

        • CBN, I feel this as well–deeply. The day when I realized that life isn’t fair and FW/OW don’t lose any sleep at night is, strangely, when I started to sleep better at night too: “They don’t feel badly at all and, because life isn’t fair, they’ll probably live long and happy lives…. so why am I holding myself back waiting for something that will never happen (like karma, or fairness, or either of them feeling a bit of remorse)?” Once I let go of wishing for unicorns and other things that will never happen, I slept better.

        • Same with the FW in regards to sailing off into the sunset free of consequences. He’s got a great job and is very well-off, he is very active and present in our kids’ lives, he’s in great shape, etc.

  • My beloved is a Brit. I keep track of the royals so that doesn’t have to and can feign annoyance when I bring him up to date. My studies show that there are, alas, many, many Brits who think Charlie’s airs smell like roses and that his chosen schmoop’s do too. The spare just frankly stinks but I can almost drum up sympathy for his attitude toward daddy and the schmoop. Queen indeed.

    • I question whether many of us *do* think that about Charles and his cart horse. I think it’s more to do with the fact that the majority of us are pretty strong monarchists, and if you accept a monarchy at all, you have to accept the line of succession, regardless of whether you think the current monarch is a shit, and since he married Camilla, unfortunately she becomes Queen. But I could be wrong, of course.

  • Camilla hand picked Dianna – fiegning to be her friend, but set her up (basically a teenager) for a life of misery. Charles was up to his eyeballs in it, too. Camilla was in a horrible marriage, her spouse a notorious cheater – WHY would she DO the same in turn to a teen?
    The fact Camilla would “take tea” with Dianna to try to figure out if Dianna was catching on is an entire new level of trash.

    • Added: Diana was only 16 when they met. They met in person about 12 times before the engagement. She was the perfect stoolie for this pair.

    • Why would Camilla do to Diana, what was done to her ? Because she’s an entitled cheater, and what she wants trumps everything else. It’s how they roll, after all.

      • Think about this, too. Why would Diana do to another woman what had been done to her?

  • Webster’s Dictionary lists “escort” as an obsolete meaning of “consort.” I’d say it’s still relevant! And Charles is the ultimate cake eater. Mummy says no but I still want her! My teen bride be damned!

  • No one will ever convince me that Camilla was not neck deep in the mess that sent Harry and Meghan half way around the world to get away from this cluster*ck. She’s like ever AP who pretends to blend a family while making her own kids the special ones.

    • This. ☝🏻 100% true. I’m so happy Harry had the courage to remove himself (and his family) from a clusterfuck of his family.

      • A “clusterfuck” of a family which both he and his ghastly wife profess to despise, yet cling onto, along with their titles. Because that’s all either of them have.

        • The cartoon South Park did a hilarious takedown of those two about their privacy tour and Harry’s book Wash/Spare

          • My favourite bit was when he opened up her head, and it was empty. 🤣😝

          • Yes, they did. It was great. I don’t care about the Royals at all but when I first heard they were leaving the royal family all I thought was good for them.

            But then I kept hearing about them. Constantly. They went on tours and never shut the fuck up. And how many years has it been now? South Park nailed them. Dead on. I don’t look for celebrity or royal news at all and I have had to hear so much from these narcissistic asshats who keep screaming they just want to live their lives. Like, ok then, go the fuck away and do that already.

    • TBH my unpopular opinion of Meghan is that she would have done exactly what Camilla did if it could have got her into the family. She imagined she was on the fast track to fabulous, and when she realised that the royals are about public service and she wasn’t going to be The New Diana, she threw a giant ‘I’m the victim here’ tantrum and flounced out of there. Camilla probably saw her and recognised her own kind.

  • Think about Glenn Close in Fatal attraction. Camilla will not be ignored. She might boil a bunny. She won the ultimate prize, Charles! Personally, I think they deserve each other. Sparkle and shine!

    An OW must be legitimate. Her past sins, and his, were really Destiny! Their Twu-Luv will not be denied! Launch the ceremony. Ah, now all is right with God and the world!

    Oh bother, I think I hear my life calling. So sorry, I will not be able to attend the festivities!

  • Chump Lady I’m so glad you’re on my team. I love that you don’t back down from anyone!

  • In my world, if Diana had lived,she would have joined Meghan and Harry in California to be near her precious son and her doted on grandchildren. Busy with babysitting, enjoying all their cookies and toys. A STAR in town, on TV, movie’s
    a new book each year! “Lose a KING,
    live happily ever after” …She would be Teaching the young ones the value of love and spotting those pretenders to the throne,pointing them out. Instructing them on what a REAL LIFE looks like.I think Diane would have been so proud of her son and his daring move. Can you pictures this? Diana would sit on Harry’s couch and laugh at the Coronation till milk ran out of her nose. She would say to OW Camilla, pretender to the throne..YOU CAN HAVE HIM!!! Every ORGAN of his is YOURS!! She would not have wanted Charles or the Throne!l. She would have wanted a life. Someone thoughtful in the UK would have given Diana a copy of CLs Tracys amazing book’ Lose a very creepy Cheater and save your life. She would hug her grandchildren, throw her arms around her son and Meghan and say this is my life and I am living it. So Camilla can call herself corned beef and sit in a can on the shelf at Dollar General, but the REAL QUEEN will always be Diana. 90% of the UK can be Switzerland and the whole Royal Family can be co conspirators but I’m waiting for Diana’s son William to take the plastic throne. If Diana had lived, she might have seen that too and enjoyed a life of grandchildren and true love. I envision Diana on Harry’s couch saying..ok enough of that paper celebrations and confetti, let’s watch Sponge Bob. Meh anybody?

    • Aren’t you forgetting Diana *also* had several affairs with *married* men ? She was no bloody saint.

      • People do not seem to know this. Diana had several affairs while married to Chuck, and chased and stalked married men before and after her divorce. Wealthy people have lots of time on their hands.

      • Not to mention those who knew Diana reporting she would not have been a fan and would have been very disappointed in Harry leaving his brother. Diana was no saint, and she clearly suffered from mental illness. But she also did the work in service Meghan refused to do. Meghan talks a great game about colonizing but she sure loves the title!

  • Yes! It’s like a riddle I once heard: If you call a cat a bird, how many legs will it have? The answer is FOUR. You can call it whatever you want, but it still ain’t gonna fly.

  • “Consort.” Which is old English for slut bucket” 🤣
    Thank you CL!
    ‘There is more side chick offspring in the coronation than actual royal offspring. What happened to the version of Camilla who was content to just be in Charles’s life?’
    Isn’t this just so typical of OWs’? They are shameless.
    EX FW told me side chick wanted to live separately until her young kids were out of the house. Haha
    They moved in together right away and got married v soon after.
    It’s the whole shameless, entitlement piece that I find so gobsmacking.And FW’s seem so easily manipulated by their cheating partner.Whatever the OW wants…
    There are a whole bunch of jokes out there on how queen Camilla has given hope to side chicks everywhere!

  • I’m from the UK and ex royalist. Those two though, nah, I’m done!

    The twu wuv narrative and the classic smear campaign they waged along with the Darvo 🤮

    Classic cheaters narc crap

    Viva la revolution!

    Ps ‘withered bosom’ 😂🤣😂

  • As soon as I read that Camilla called herself “Queen” (or who knows? Maybe Charles insisted now that he is King and could override his Mother’s wishes), I thought of this scene from Princess Bride. (Skip to 1:35)

    I can only imagine the security they’ll need to keep folks from screaming nasty things to pig Camilla…. She’ll be lucky if no one throws rotten tomatoes at her.

    She can smile all she wants and can put on a crown… But she’ll always be remembered as the foul OW who contributed to the abuse of Diana. And Charles will forever be her tampon.

    This coronation is vigorously being spackled for a year in advance and it still can’t hide the foul smell of 2 people no one want in the “monarchy”…. And the sadness and mess around Harry and Meghan. Royal shitshow Indeed.

  • As much as I love your site and blog, I think you are completely wrong about Camilla. You should familiarize yourself with European culture. These situations were very common due to arranged marriages as was Charles and Diana. Imagine if you were in an arranged marriage with someone you were not in love with in the first place and essentially forced into the situation by family and politics. I am sure you would be completely happy spending your life pretending to be something you are not for the sake of appearances. Keep your comments for the real assholes out there who lie, cheat, and abuse their spouses that they claim to “love”. And you can save any negative comments that I don’t know what it is like to be a chump. I absolutely do. I am a domestic violence survivor that was married to a cheating abusive fuckwit. In fact, it was your book that helped me understand and get through that part of my life and I read your blogs everyday. With all due respect, on this particular occasion, you are completely off base.

    • Former Chump,
      We are all familiar with the arranged marriages. There was still abuse. They are all abusive. Camilla was nasty and cruel. Charles was nasty and cruel. They treated Diana like garbage. I’m not going to “woah is me” for “poor Charles” stuck in an arranged marriage. Camilla wasn’t in an arranged marriage… she was just a creepy married OW. Diana was a young girl who fell in love with Charles… He played her and used her. The whole thing is gross. Stop.

    • If Charles didn’t want to be in an ‘arranged’ marriage to Diana then he should have just said ‘No’. But he didn’t have the courage to do what he wanted. He had a choice – and he choose to do marry Diana, lie to her and abuse her.

    • Charles had the option of marrying the woman he loved and giving up the throne. His uncle did it. But like all fuckwits, he wanted cake. Lots of cake. And destroyed a young woman’s life in the process. You would be correct in your opinion if he was honest with Diana from the start and explained that this would be a political marriage and Camilla would remain in his life. Then she would have had the choice of accepting the terms or not. Instead, he led a 19-year-old girl to believe that she was living a fairy tale when in fact she was entering a nightmare that ended in her premature death.

    • Formerchump, I’m from Europe and familiar with its history

      If this is twu wuv, why the usual bag of tricks?

      Diana was spun as the unstable, attention seeker after all their cruelty, blame shifting and contempt

      Any distress caused as a natural reaction to abuse labelled as histrionics. A tale as old as time

      Poor Charles had to seek refuge, boohoo. Diana was a child when she was groomed, had to undergo ‘tests’ to prove she was a virgin and used to produce an heir and a spare

      How many of us had the exact same treatment? The controlled narrative, the cruel, insane sexless chump. Fill in the appropriate blameshifting blanks

      How the poor cheaters suffered, blah, blah

      I used to love all the pomp and ceremony as a child but I cannot get on board with any of this. Skip a generation at the very least

    • Are you secretly Camilla? Her circumstances don’t make it ok that she conspired in the abuse of a young woman.

    • But it wasn’t an arranged marriage in the sense you’re referring to, where *both* parties are aware of the terms of the bargain. Diana was a naive 19 year old, who was in love with Charles. Charles on the other hand, knew perfectly well he loved Camilla, but didn’t have the character and integrity to either stand up and insist on marrying her, or to drop her totally and try to make his marriage with Diana work. Hardly a level playing field.

    • Let me answer your “Imagine if you were in an arranged marriage with someone you were not in love with in the first place and essentially forced into the situation by family and politics”.



      Muddle through and make the best of it, especially if you decide to have children.

      There are a lot of highly successful arranged marriages. One just needs to decide if they are going to be kind and respectful (you know, honor your vows) or become a tampon to their side piece.

    • I am on Quora and you would not believe the filth that is written about Meghan Markle. You can tell that these people are paid to put this kind of shit wherever they can because they have to take away the ability of Harry and Megan to be popular. I don’t think they’ve done a good job so far.

      • Or it could just be that they see her for what she is, and refuse to accept what she says of herself. We’re all entitled to our opinions.

    • FC, he could have chosen somebody who knew the score, accepted it, and wasn’t a teenager, FFS. There are lots of shallow, mercenary women who would have married him knowing it wasn’t going to be a real marriage, just in order to be part of the royal family. He could easily have told the truth. But no, he wanted a naif he could exploit and abuse. What’s the fun of cheating on somebody who knew beforehand it would happen and accepted it? There is no excuse for what he did.

      • Exactly!

        He needs to grow the fuck up, such a self-entitled baby. That was on display during his signing ceremony with the leaky pen. But FWs don’t change, and you can see that in Camillla as she walks uncomfortably & dutifully behind him, fear in her eyes as she’s not sure when one of his tantrums will occur. She does not look very happy around him. She even goes to her own house whenever they get out of London and go to the country.

        That’s why I try not to focus on what is occuring over in FW land. I don’t know what’s truly going on. I was midly surprised when I saw FWs car this week with a handicap sticker in it. He’s 58, lifelong runner and we always worked out together. Today is actually 6 year anniversary of DD#2 (I only remembered because I had a therapy session this week–totally forgot) and I can’t believe how much he’s deteriorated. He really does not look good.

  • I’m so glad you wrote about this today, Chump Lady! I was waiting for it as soon as I read the news that now Miss AP/co-homewrecker would be called Queen, which made me fume. You did not disappoint!

    Also, I must say that I will never understand the British royal title system. How is it that the late Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh, stayed a consort of the queen the whole time, when he was born a royal and was as closely related to Queen Victoria as Queen Elizabeth was? But Camilla gets to be known as Queen. What a strange system.

    • I believe it’s just lingering sexism; a King outranks a Queen. So Philip could not be a King or he would have outranked Elizabeth, but it’s okay for Camilla to be Queen because she won’t outrank Charles.

  • ‘Over the course of two and a half decades, imagine the moves, the information that’s been exchanged, the people who’ve been sold out and sacrificed so that Charles and Camilla could arrive at this moment.’ More from Lainey gossip

  • Had to look it up. Here is definition of all the queens on wikipedia.

    A queen consort is the wife of a reigning king, and usually shares her spouse’s social rank and status. She holds the feminine equivalent of the king’s monarchical titles and may be crowned and anointed, but historically she does not formally share the king’s political and military powers, unless on occasion acting as regent.[1][2]

    In contrast, a queen regnant is a female monarch who rules suo jure and usually becomes queen by inheriting the throne upon the death of the previous monarch.[3]

    The title and style of a queen consort is, like that of a queen regnant, “Her Majesty the Queen”.[4]

    A queen dowager is a widowed queen consort, and a queen mother is a queen dowager who is the mother of the current monarch.

  • Perhaps this is the last generation of fairy tales which prepared many chumps for abuse. I think Beauty and the Beast should come with a warning label.

  • The Crown was mostly a whitewashed rehab of Camilla but there were a few funny moments depicting her as a thick-skinned rhinoceros with practiced skills in prodding and punishing Charlies like a Skinner dog.

    The key thing seems to be “negative relational attitude.” From the study, “Mate Poaching: Who is Most Likely to Poach and Why?”

    “Study 1 examined whether similar negative attitudes are also associated with mate poaching. Specifically, I examined negative relational attitudes that seem characteristic of a ‘mean’ mate poacher. Research examining relational aggression and hypercompetitiveness suggests that people who are high in these measures engage in mean acts towards their romantic partner (e.g., flirting with others to make a partner jealous, threatening to break up with a partner if the partner does not comply; Linder, Crick, & Collins, 2002) and have a greater tendency to inflict pain on their partner (Ryckman, Thornton, Gold, & Burckle, 2002). Other research examining entitlement attitudes suggests that people who have high expectations that they should receive special treatment are vengeful to others (Finkel, 2005). Combined, these findings suggest that certain women are more likely to engage in behaviors that are not only destructive to their own relationships, but also to others’ relationships.”

    I never followed royal scandals back when the only sources were either tabloid trash or stiff official presentations. There are no universal human truths to be found in bullshit. If anything, the Camilla drama might illustrate how affairs are one of the only set-ups which would allow two pathological, miserable people with “negative relational attitudes” to divert some of their aggression– at least in the opening stages– away from each other and towards a mutual target, the chump. Without the scapegoat around to catch the runoff, bonding wouldn’t be possible and it would just be two bullies in a pit snarling and slashing at each other. When Diana was out of the picture, Camilla and, to some extent Charles, apparently literally used Harry and William as shock absorbers by leaking personal information about Charles’ sons to the tabloids in exchange for more glowing coverage of Camilla. The hideous tabloid treatment of Meghan Markle (the Sun’s call for her to be paraded naked and strewn with excrement) was reportedly just another human sacrifice for Camilla’s rehabilitation campaign.

    Thank God the monarchy has no real power anymore or Camilla would be wearing a serf-skin cape.

    • The allegation that Charles and Camilla leaked info about William and Harry in exchange for favourable coverage of Camilla comes from Harry. Personally I’d hesitate to accept it as fact from a man who has been caught out in several lies, inconsistencies, and exaggerations. As we say about cheaters, when someone has been caught out in one lie, anything they subsequently say is suspect.

  • The “what about Diana” comments are out of place. Camilla’s intentional actions speak for themselves and Charles’ cheating was 100% his decision. CL’s excellent post is spot on.

    Camilla is, and will always be, the SIDE PIECE. That’s the point.

    • I agree that Camilla is and always will be the side piece. I disagree that pointing out Diana also had affairs with married men is out of place, why is it ? Do we give Diana a pass for being a side piece in another’s marriage, because she was cheated on in *her* marriage? Why? If someone wrote to CL with this rationale, wouldn’t we all treat it with contempt and disdain? Why should Diana be any different?

      • I feel it’s because the focus of today’s post was on Queen Camilla. Full stop.

        I don’t want to dilute CL’s extremely cogent discussion pertaining to Camilla & Charle’s behavior. Once you bring in Diana, it’s a slippery slope to excusing why Camilla should be crowned Queen.

  • “Consort.” Which is old English for slut bucket’ 😂thank you CL.
    How do these OW’s end up getting what they want when at first they profess to want only Wov?
    Do they have super powers in manipulation? The good hearted chumped spouse doesn’t get what they want!
    How do they have zero modesty, and revel in being front and centre while demolishing those in their way?

    • Please read the history of Pamela Harriman. She slept her way from marrying a Churchill to be the USA diplomat to France. I don’t know when she changed from British to American but she married a pile of money.

      • Ah yes Pamela Harriman. She was quite busy on her back, wasn’t she ? It reads that she became an American citizen to marry (and eventually inherit alot from) her third husband Averill Harriman. His children took her to court over the money. She slept with many married rich men, including Harriman and circled back to him when he became a widower. Pamela Mattress Digby Churchill Hayward Harriman.

    • I think if you come from generations of literally entitled people who customarily marry for family status and generations of children who grow up around Byzantine intrigues and watching those marriages explode, a leathery soul is a commodity. Ever been around someone you’d lost all respect for who was trying to stonewall, give you the silent treatment, manipulate or punish you in some way? It hardly raises your pulse. Imagine if you were that meh about everyone. You could play other people like pinball games.

    • I guess being the King’s girlfriend means people don’t want to piss her off. They won’t get their heads cut off these days, but people are still very tuned in to the benefits of power dynamics. For certain people, having a job in the royal household would be a very prestigious thing in their lives.

  • CL, I was having a rocky day, but Queen Aretha just lifted my spirits, so thank you.

    Seems she also lifted Mick Jagger right out of his seat in the back.

    I’d help build her shrine. Freddie’s too. Killer Queens. ❤️❤️

      • I know the worship comments of Aretha are lighthearted, and I love this movie, love Aretha’s voice, and am blown away by her skill.

        As a Black artist with fairly inside contact with quite a few literary and performance “queens,” I just want to say that we only ever have access to a certain public facing persona of even our most brilliant artists. I don’t know much about Aretha as a person, do know that she was connected politically, etc and that her career was part of an interconnected system of Black entertainers, preachers and business people. After hearing many many young people speak lightheartedly of [insert your most beloved Black literary or musical or performance hero here] and knowing that I’ve been on the receiving end of another side of that very person, I can never again feel comfortable with any idolizing.

        I’m the one of the leftiest, queerish, BLM-organizing femmes you’ll meet, who literally practices by vocals by imitating Aretha, and I still get itchy around any kind of over the top of fanpersoning that moves into worship territory. I’ve encountered the liberation politics equivalent of Jesus-cheaters / Royal-cheaters (whom others idealize morally, trust to do no wrong and would be pissed to hear criticized) they’re just Activist-Witch-Goddess-Of-The-Global-Majority cheaters. I continue to teach their work because it’s too culturally important not to. I do believe a voice like Aretha’s is a thing of God/the Universe, and can understand worship vibes around that, but my innocence around the humans who carry such gifts is devastated from having been, more than once, politically-spiritually-creatively chumped by people whose hearts I believed pure in realms outside their creative persona. You would recognize the names of some of the folks I mean.

        So, I heart Aretha. I will turn again and again to hear to hear her as she worships with that voice. But I will never worship her.

  • Yesterday a page showed up about Rosa Parks saying NO. Official drek. She is the queen as well as Lady Bird Johnson who told us to get outside and look at our environment. Maya Angelou kept on rising. Oprah pushed kindness as a way of life. We have our queens thank you very much.

    • I was Oprah’a featured guest on her show in 1991. She is a jerk.

  • Haha… “Consort.” Which is old English for slut bucket. Love it!

  • I call her “Queen Side Piece.”

    I don’t understand why the British want to continue to have a monarchy, but apparently they do. I’m glad my ancestors decided to revolt!

  • Im in London, as in the rest of the world, the cost of living is terrible. you would have thought King Charles talking about being a tampon would have put women right off buying tampons. some of the royalty were nazi supporters.

  • Camilla and Charles – a couple of Narcissistic inbreds who deserve each other – shame they didn’t stay together decades ago instead of imposing their selfish sense of entitlement and fairytale duty on the lives of others. The only thing sillier than their grimacing smiles are the hundreds of townspeople waving their tiny flags in co-dependent glee. Utter nonsense.

  • CL, you have out done yourself! Camilla can call herself a turkey sandwich. Doesn’t make her one.HA!

  • Charles is weak as pee water when it comes to women and he’s been pussy whipped by Camilla. The woman is vile and without the finesse of royal grace. As an English woman I believe our monarchy does still have a place on our little island, for the alternative, and what would likely fill the void is perilous indeed, but these two? Ffs give me a break. They all need to remember whose taxes keep them in Moët and Fry’s Turkish delight. Our Lizzie was without doubt the most extraordinary monarch ever to rule, and these two twats have no chance of living up to that.

    As for Harry and Smegan….he needs to stop pandering to her petulant demands and stop whinging. He made his bed. Now stop bleeding about your bloody ‘privacy’ while you continue to publicly demand recognition you muppet.

    And Andrew? Why isn’t he locked up yet, the pompous pervert.

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