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Red Flags You Overlooked?

October 9, 2020 by Chump Lady

Today’s Friday Challenge is brought to you by Spackle! It brightens! It whitens! Do you have some unsightly behavior you need covering? SPACKLE! *** Every healthy relationship possess a small degree of spackle. You overlook the bad morning breath, the way she leaves her shoes everywhere, how he drives 10 miles under the speed limit. […]

Filed Under: Chumps Decoded, Spackle Tagged With: red flags

He’s Sketchy, But Is He Cheating?

September 16, 2020 by Chump Lady

Dear Chump Lady, I’ve been married to a man for 20 years. From day one, he has done some questionable things. Maintained a dating profile (from what I can tell, it never went further than initial response, aka “I hooked you” ego kibble.) After I found these repeatedly, he seemed to stop with that. However, […]

Filed Under: Gaslighting, Spackle, Trust that they suck Tagged With: Marriage Police, Trust

He Cheated on Her Daughter. She Spackled.

June 24, 2020 by Chump Lady

Serial cheater

Dear Chump Lady, I thought I was going crazy until I read your site about how cheaters think and how much they will lie and manipulate to maintain cake. I have an interesting twist on the cheating story that shows you how much of a chump I am! I am the mom of a daughter […]

Filed Under: Dating, Sociopathy, Spackle Tagged With: abusive boyfriend, manipulation, sociopath

‘I’m Afraid of Him’

June 15, 2020 by Chump Lady

Voodoo doll

Hi Chump Lady, I look for all the world like I have achieved meh, but behind the scenes I am a struggling wreck. I have become so terrified of my ex that I am convinced he will harm me. And here’s the twist — I’m pretty certain I am just being dramatic! He sends me […]

Filed Under: Spackle, Trust that they suck Tagged With: co-parenting with a fuckwit, Domestic Violence, Fear

New Words for the Chump Condition?

May 1, 2020 by Chump Lady

Dear Chump Lady, I’ve been thinking about the being mighty part of moving on lately, and I think I have a new term for the Chump dictionary: special snowflake chump. As I write to you, I’m thinking to myself how I could never hate my ex because, 1) he was my first long-term relationship, 2) […]

Filed Under: Spackle Tagged With: Friday Challenge

Love, The All-Purpose Spackle

April 21, 2020 by Chump Lady

Anyone else notice this phenomenon? On infidelity forums, you’ll read a thread describing a thousand horrors and humiliations and invariably it ends — “but I love him.” But I love him. King’s X. “But I love him” (or her) means I can’t leave. As long as I feel love for this person, it cancels out […]

Filed Under: Spackle Tagged With: Spackle

Biggest Whopper You Bought?

April 10, 2020 by Chump Lady

gym cheater

Every now and then as a Friday Challenge, CN tries to out-do each other with Most Outlandish Lie we were fed. Which is bad enough. What’s worse is that — trusting, foolish chumps we once were — we bought it. Like the cheater who refused to wear his wedding ring “out of consideration” for his […]

Filed Under: Deception, Spackle Tagged With: Lies, Spackle

How Do I Get Over Feelings of Unfairness?

January 6, 2020 by Chump Lady

Hi Chump Lady, So I chucked out my ex after D-Day 2 a couple of months ago (although D-Day 1 was technically affairs…. I also suspect there have been more). We have been together 22 years, married for 13, and have 3 young kids. I had to be the one to end our relationship despite […]

Filed Under: Anger, Spackle Tagged With: Grief, Unfair

This Is Your Brain on Hopium

December 27, 2019 by Chump Lady

Hopium is a powerful drug. You can hand a chump the most desperate set of circumstances, and goddamn it, that chump will work with it. Let’s just give it a year! I owe it to us to try! Sure, I can ionize my needs into tiny, undetectable particles! You’ll never get a whiff of my anger, […]

Filed Under: Hopium, Spackle Tagged With: Hopium

Your Very Best Spackle Please

September 18, 2019 by Chump Lady

At breakfast the other day Mr. CL ran a spackle scenario by me. He  was reading “Chicken Soup for the Soul for Couples.” Let me stop here. I said, “I can’t tell CN you were reading ‘Chicken Soup for the Soul for Couples,’ they’re going to think I made you up. Like you’re a magical goat […]

Filed Under: Spackle Tagged With: Gift giving, Making excuses, Spackle

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