Dear Chump Lady, A good friend shared with me the moment that catapulted her into chumpdom. I thought our shared experience, and my subsequent email to her, could possibly make a good Friday Challenge topic — chumps sharing the love-bombing technique used on them. Here are our sagas….. Hers began by her sharing how a […]
Red Flags You Overlooked?
Today’s Friday Challenge is brought to you by Spackle! It brightens! It whitens! Do you have some unsightly behavior you need covering? SPACKLE! *** Every healthy relationship possess a small degree of spackle. You overlook the bad morning breath, the way she leaves her shoes everywhere, how he drives 10 miles under the speed limit. […]
He’s Sketchy, But Is He Cheating?
Dear Chump Lady, I’ve been married to a man for 20 years. From day one, he has done some questionable things. Maintained a dating profile (from what I can tell, it never went further than initial response, aka “I hooked you” ego kibble.) After I found these repeatedly, he seemed to stop with that. However, […]
He Cheated on Her Daughter. She Spackled.
Dear Chump Lady, I thought I was going crazy until I read your site about how cheaters think and how much they will lie and manipulate to maintain cake. I have an interesting twist on the cheating story that shows you how much of a chump I am! I am the mom of a daughter […]
‘I’m Afraid of Him’
Hi Chump Lady, I look for all the world like I have achieved meh, but behind the scenes I am a struggling wreck. I have become so terrified of my ex that I am convinced he will harm me. And here’s the twist — I’m pretty certain I am just being dramatic! He sends me […]
New Words for the Chump Condition?
Dear Chump Lady, I’ve been thinking about the being mighty part of moving on lately, and I think I have a new term for the Chump dictionary: special snowflake chump. As I write to you, I’m thinking to myself how I could never hate my ex because, 1) he was my first long-term relationship, 2) […]
Love, The All-Purpose Spackle
Anyone else notice this phenomenon? On infidelity forums, you’ll read a thread describing a thousand horrors and humiliations and invariably it ends — “but I love him.” But I love him. King’s X. “But I love him” (or her) means I can’t leave. As long as I feel love for this person, it cancels out […]
Biggest Whopper You Bought?
Every now and then as a Friday Challenge, CN tries to out-do each other with Most Outlandish Lie we were fed. Which is bad enough. What’s worse is that — trusting, foolish chumps we once were — we bought it. Like the cheater who refused to wear his wedding ring “out of consideration” for his […]
How Do I Get Over Feelings of Unfairness?
Hi Chump Lady, So I chucked out my ex after D-Day 2 a couple of months ago (although D-Day 1 was technically affairs…. I also suspect there have been more). We have been together 22 years, married for 13, and have 3 young kids. I had to be the one to end our relationship despite […]
This Is Your Brain on Hopium
Hopium is a powerful drug. You can hand a chump the most desperate set of circumstances, and goddamn it, that chump will work with it. Let’s just give it a year! I owe it to us to try! Sure, I can ionize my needs into tiny, undetectable particles! You’ll never get a whiff of my anger, […]
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