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Sad Sausage Tales?

September 18, 2020 by Chump Lady

The sad sausage self-pity channel probably provokes more Stupid Shit Cheaters Say than the other two channels, rage and “charm.” It’s kind of absurd for chumps to expect comfort from the cheaters who gutted us, but it is exponentially more ridiculous that cheaters want sympathy from chumps. Really, dude, you want me to understand that you’re […]

Filed Under: Blameshifting Tagged With: Sad sausage, Self-pity

He Cheated… Everyone Feels Sorry for Him

July 6, 2020 by Chump Lady

Dear Chump Lady, It has been 9 months since D-Day #2 and today would have been our 9th anniversary. A few days ago my STBXH made a public social media post about his mental health — admitting contemplating suicide, being in counseling and on meds — even (and this made me sick) making a vague […]

Filed Under: Ego kibbles, Switzerland Friends, Telling people Tagged With: Sad sausage, Switzerland Friends

UBT: “I Miss the Kitties”

August 5, 2019 by Chump Lady

Dear Chump Lady, Wow, I can’t get it together. I have tried so very hard , but I do not know why after so many years, 35 to be exact and 2 years post divorce, I’m not doing well. Here is a letter from my ex-husband after I told him I am divorcing him. A […]

Filed Under: Abandonment, universal bullshit translator Tagged With: Sad sausage, Universal Bullshit Translator

UBT: This Isn’t The Real Me

June 26, 2019 by Chump Lady

Ben recently submitted this glorious bit of bullshit from his not-terribly-remorseful wife. She’d like to set the record straight that the woman who cheated on him was NOT her. Well, not the core her anyway. (And if it’s just your genitals cheating, and not your core, it doesn’t count, right?) You’ll all be relieved to know that […]

Filed Under: universal bullshit translator Tagged With: Sad sausage

UBT: “I Don’t Mean to Worry You, But…”

November 26, 2018 by Chump Lady

Dear Chump Lady, My (now ex-) husband of 23 years (together since we were both 16 at school, so 31 years in total) began behaving strangely. One night while he was sleeping, I crept around his side of the bed to check out his phone and found, to my horror, that he was engaging in […]

Filed Under: No contact, universal bullshit translator Tagged With: Sad sausage

UBT: “I Found Myself and Had an Affair”

September 24, 2018 by Chump Lady

An alert chump sent me this letter to “Meredith” an advice columnist, that ran in the Boston Globe’s Love Letters. In it, a cheater laments his pain since his affair partner moved away and how the affair was a chance for him to Find Himself. (Look in the file under “Douchebag.”) Meredith handled it pretty admirably […]

Filed Under: universal bullshit translator Tagged With: Narcissist, Sad sausage, Universal Bullshit Translator

Dear Chump Lady, Why must cheaters add insult to injury?

June 27, 2018 by Chump Lady

Dear Chump Lady, I am about 5 months out from D-Day. My husband and I were married for 6 years and together for a total of 14 (high school sweethearts we have been dating since we were 15). At the beginning of the year we had a fight regarding our sex life (or lack there […]

Filed Under: Ask Chump Lady, Blameshifting, Cake Eating, Cheater Tactics Tagged With: Cheater Tactics, Mindfuck channels, Sad sausage

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