If you’ve ever had the pleasure of discovering your partner’s secret correspondence to a fuckbuddy, you know how ridiculous kibble-speak can be. Devastating? Sure. But also hilarious in a gallows humor kind of way. What’s more absurd than the breathy adolescent sweet talk of two cheaters in limerence?
Your fun Friday challenge is to share that stupid shit Schmoopies say with Chump Nation.
Need some inspiration? Check out the genius Soul Mate Schmoopie video series. (“My dick is perfect.” “Yes. Your dick is perfect.”) The robot voices crack me up.
Similarly, for the dissonance of eroticism-meets-gravel-truck, enjoy Gilbert Gottfried reading 50 Shades of Grey.