Dear Chump Lady,
I would love to read your opinion on Alice Evans and how she is handling her betrayal and divorce. I’m torn between understanding her pain and thinking she has lost her dignity. I was chumped a long time ago, before the internet. I could have used your wisdom to help me navigate my horrible first marriage.
Several readers asked me to weigh in on this. To anyone catching up: Alice Evans is an actress and mother of two, who is in the process of a divorce from human beard scruff, Ioan Gruffudd.
This came as news to Alice and her daughters. And rather than do that thing centuries of obsolete wife appliances have done before — fade into the background, accept a shitty payoff, and shut up For The Children — Alice has not gone quietly.
In a scathing post, she penned: “So, it turns out that my husband, after two years of telling me I’m a bad person and I’m not exciting and he no longer wants to have sex with me and he just wants to be on set abroad – has been in a relationship for THREE years behind all our backs.”
The Other Woman was purportedly a friend. Alice asked on Twitter who knew about this and didn’t tell her?
Alice has been excoriated for processing her chumpdom publicly. Her husband humiliating her publicly, however, is tickety-boo.
Alice’s Twitter tagline reads:
“I do not sleep with married men. I do not wreck homes. I do not ruin little kids’ lives.”
Has Alice lost her dignity?
I think it’s the wrong question. Who the hell would want to live this nightmare in the glare of Hollywood tabloids? Is she making rookie chump mistakes? Sure. Who among us didn’t?
Pick me dance pro-tip: Alice, sweetheart — Ioan is not a prize. He’s a cheater. Bianca isn’t special — she’s dim and available. And easily replaceable.
Is ANYONE asking if Ioan Gruffodd acted with dignity? He’s in a contentious divorce with small children, but out there heart emoji-ing his fuckbuddy with “Thank you for making me smile again.”
Oh you poor man. Locked in a cruel tower of monogamy for years. Unable to smile. What with your leading man millions, career, stunning wife and small children… a sad sausage. And only special snatch can make you smile again.
Everyone be HAPPY for Ioan. Virile Man Dumps Old Wife for New Model!
Alice’s mistake is not going along with his narrative. Slopping her grief all over Twitter. Telling people publicly since January that he left them and abruptly filed. Months later it seems, she finds out why he left — a long-term affair. That everyone knew about, but her.
It isn’t what he did — it’s her reaction to it.
She got angry. And the world around her gaslights her that there’s nothing to be angry about. Accept this is how it is. You’re 50. She’s 20 years younger. You’re been a good birthing vessel to two children. Thank you for your service. Here’s your pink slip. Now leave, before security escorts you.
I’m going to bed now.I have about 4 hrs to sleep.
The abject CRUELTY that the media is heaping on me is crushing.
But I will NOT give up.
Fuck you tabloids.
He CHEATED ON ME while I was looking after his kids 8,000 miles away. Of course I’m furious
Watch this space, guys
— Alice Evans (@AliceEvansGruff) November 4, 2021