The Annual Infidelity Valentine’s Day Poetry Contest
You didn’t think I forgot, did you? It’s time again for Infidelity Valentines!
During this season of love, roses, and cut-rate chocolates, it’s important to remember the less fortunate — those poor sods that wound up with our exes — and immortalize them in verse.
So send me a poem! Just like previous year’s contests, I’m looking for either a haiku or a limerick that encapsulates your cheater experience. The winners get inscribed copies of my book (I’ll ship anywhere). I will announce the winner on Valentine’s Day and draw some accompanying cartoons. So hey, the day isn’t a total waste, right?
To recap from 8th grade English, a haiku is a poem with 5-7-5 syllables.
I love you but I’m…
Christ, you are such a cliche
…not in love with you.
A limerick is a 5 line poem with a rhyme scheme of AABBA.
There once was a mistress named Kay
Who was a better liar than a lay
She had HPV
And now it’s with me
My husband’s clap conveys
To inspire you, here are former winners with cartoons:
Bring it ON, CN!
P.S. To those of you wondering where the Xmas cartoons are — I will do a twofer, and get them all up by Valentine’s Day. Our guest bedroom doubles as my office/studio and it’s been occupied since Xmas… that and I seem to spend my weekends at protests lately. Any who — sorry for the delay, but my cartooning powers shall return!
ThatGirl