Hey, it’s time for a Chump Nation mightiness check in! To the newbies, about every 6 months or so I ask CN to tell me how the “gain a life” thing is going. The holidays can be rough, and maybe you don’t feel as if have any Christmas-newsletter-above-the-fold sort of achievements to report.
We’ll take anything! 30 days of no contact. 30 hours of no contact. 30 shots of egg nog and a very ill-considered text message. Everyone can play, wherever you are in the chump journey. (Leave a cheater? Everyone’s a winner!) Chances are you’re ahead of someone else, so offer some encouragement.
I hope the further along folks here can compare their Holiday’s past to their Holiday’s present and give the newbies hope.
A little holiday story, I’ve shared here before, from the Xmas after my D-Day (it seems like a lifetime ago. It was 11 years ago…) Cheater gave me a tie-dyed license plate cover as a gift, announced he had to work, and so my son and I drove to Ohio without him. It’s all a blur now. Just later, during the brief idiotic reconciliation period, I called him out on where he was on Xmas and he said he “forgot.”
If you’ve read my book, you know what comes next. My shrink Janet — the tiny, potty-mouthed truth teller called him out. “BULLSHIT! I’M A JEW. EVEN I KNOW WHERE I WAS ON XMAS!” She wasn’t kind or subtle, but she was effective.
Fast forward to today. I don’t waste time on fuckwits. Mr. Chump Lady and I are headed to the Midwest for X-mas and the biggest drama is that my mother wants to make a low-fat turkey tettrazeni for dinner. (All cooking with low fat cream cheese and frozen vegetables comes to a bad end. DON’T CUT CORNERS! Turkey tetrazzini needs whipping cream and sherry. So stage an intervention with your full-fat recipes if you’ve got them.)
Life gets better post-fuckwit. Promise.
Tell me how you’re mighty! Happy holidays and Love to Chump Nation!