Dear Chump Lady, It has been over 5 years since D-Day, and about 3-1/2 years since I have spoken or seen my fuckwad cheater. I just found a journal entry that I made at the time, and I realized that I am STILL BROKEN-HEARTED. Although I have put my life back together to some extent, […]
Dear Chump Lady, I drunk dialed
Dear Chump Lady, I was in a six-year relationship with a compulsive liar, so I have really appreciated your articles. We broke up last year. He proposed on my birthday. Unproposed two weeks later saying his parents did not approve. He got married last month. That’s that. I was wondering whether you could give me […]
What Advice Would You Give an Earlier You?
Who wouldn’t love a do-over? I’m sure a few of you navigated this shit perfectly right out of the starting gate, but most of us floundered in the most humiliating of ways. If you could go back in time (and no, you don’t get to wish your whole relationship away, the time machine only allows […]
Your Mightiest Moment?
You know I’m all about the Mighty here. Facing adversity, building a new life, managing to eat Whole 30 for a whole 30 days… Today’s fun Friday challenge is to tell me One Mighty Moment when you were your best self. Unlike our typical “Tell Me How You’re Mighty” challenges, which tend to be a […]
Radical Kindness
I was watching “Won’t You Be My Neighbor?” last night, about the life of Fred Rogers (of Mr. Roger’s Neighborhood television fame) and it struck me what a revolutionary Mr. Rogers was. Maybe it’s the divisive awful times we’re living in, but to see someone preach kindness and live kindness was positively radical. It’s easy […]
Tiffany Glass Windows
Hey, I’m rerunning a favorite today. Too much birthday celebration last night. Back to normality tomorrow. Hi chumps! I’ve been on vacation with my family in Orlando, Florida for a few days. Yesterday my mother and I visited the Morse Museum in Winter Park, which if you find yourself in the Disney World orbit, I […]
Chump Lady Descends Into Middle Age
Happy birthday to me today. Every year I rerun this column, which has become one of the founding texts of CN. To the newbies, my 40th birthday was absurdly awful — I spent it shoveling shit. What a difference a few years makes. It’s 2018 now, I’m fifty&^%#two (!!!) today and I’m working on my […]
Science Vindicates ‘Leave a Cheater, Gain a Life’
So here’s some good news — a new study came out vindicating chumps everywhere. Psychologists asked over 5,000 women chumps about their relationship break-ups. Turns out the chumps fixed their pickers, learned from the experience, and had better future relationships. They also experienced more personal growth outside their relationships. And karma bonus — the Other Woman who “won” the cheater? They turn […]
Problem? Adulting vs. Escapism
A reader once suggested to me that a great exercise to rewire chump brains and combat blameshifting would be to play “Problem? Adult Solution, Cheater Solution.”: An example: PROBLEM: My wife and I argue often, mostly over financial matters. ADULT SOLUTION: From now on, we’re going to keep a closer eye on our finances, cutting […]
Be a Hell Raiser, Not a Chump
Today, in honor of Labor Day weekend, I’m rerunning this column about Mother Jones. Raise a glass to hard-fought child labor laws and the 8-hour workday and I’ll see you back here tomorrow! — Tracy I’m struck by how often the catalyst for an extraordinary life is loss. A friend of mine posts various nuggets […]
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