Once upon a time, GladIt’sOver’s ex presented her, apropos of nothing, with a half-eaten box of Wheatena cereal. As a “gift.” She told the story here and that telling detail has stayed with me ever since. It perfectly illustrates the Bounty for Me! Crap for You! narc dynamic. Today’s Fractured Friday Challenge is to play […]
‘I Fix Hearts. She Broke Mine.’
Hi Chump Lady, I read your book and I divorced my cheater, but I still feel like I’m not gaining a life. I’m a very busy cardiologist in a small town. In July 2018, I discovered my wife of 15 years (we had known each other for 25 years) had been having an affair with […]
What Are You Doing to Combat Loneliness?
Things can get a little lonely sometimes. New lives have their dry spells. (But remember, nothing is as arid and soul-crushing as life with a fuckwit.) I was writing to an Australian chump yesterday and sent a virtual ((hug)) and she wrote back thanks for the hug using the hashtag #combattingloneliness — and I thought, […]
Get Over It
Happy New Year 2020! Did anyone else fall asleep before the new year like I did? (It’s a holiday tradition around here.) Speaking of traditions, every Jan. 1, I run this column about those dreaded words “get over it.” Some days the struggle feels overwhelming, like life is only struggle, and persistence isn’t rewarded. […]
Pick Me Dancing for Love
Dearest Chumplady, Can you tackle this self-help notion I’ve been pondering for a while. Does anyone else feel like a lot of self-help books and well-intentioned advice still feels like pick-me dancing? Let me explain. I left a cheater 8 years ago, and rebuilt myself and my life. Moved 3,000 miles with my cats and […]
‘None of My Choices Are Acceptable’
Dear Chump Lady, Please help me with advice — I’m stuck. I’ve been reading your blog for a year and it has kept me alive in my darkest moments. Thank you. A year ago I threw my ex cheater out of our home. He wanted to come back, hence I’ve sent him to individual counseling, […]
Did Your Pet Get You Through Your Break-Up?
Today’s Fun Friday Challenge comes from Mr. CL — did your pet get you through your break up? Are you bestowing your love on rescue kittens instead of fuckwits now? Did you buy a puppy? (Can I see pictures?) Tell CN your furry friend stories! Mr. CL was fondly remembering his departed Schnauzer, Casper. (A dog […]
‘How Do I Know Friends Won’t Betray Me?’
Dear Chump Lady, I am a year and a half out from discovery and four months since divorce. I am strictly keeping no contact. I’m pretty happy for the most part. One thing that I’m struggling with is inner conflict when making friends. During discovery, I found out that my husband had been cheating on […]
Dear Chump Lady, When does the pain go away?
Dear Chump Lady, My question for you and perhaps more so, Chump Nation, is when, how long does it take before the pain goes away? How many days, months, years does it take until you wake up and go a day, few days, weeks without thinking about him? What are the experiences of your readers? […]
Can I Get Some Mighty Here?
To any of the newbies, about every 6 months or so, I ask CN to Tell Me How You’re Mighty. Wherever you are in your journey through the Valley of Suck, you report on your accomplishments. And it doesn’t have to be Phi Beta Kappa stuff like earning a law degree while living in your […]
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