Saturday was my birthday and every year I rerun the first birthday column I wrote in 2012. It’s a meditation on craptacular chumpy birthdays, and what a difference a new life — and a new partner — makes. (Not that you can’t have the new life without a new partner. This always bears repeating.) Fair […]
D-Day Anniversary Benchmarks?
Dear CL and CN, As I approach the one-year anniversary of D-day (September 26) I am taking time to reflect on what I did right and where I am. I’m proud that while I didn’t find LACGAL and CN until later, I didn’t make too many mistakes. I did dump him as soon as I […]
Be a Hell Raiser, Not a Chump
Today, in honor of Labor Day weekend, I’m rerunning this column about Mother Jones. Raise a glass to hard-fought child labor laws and the 8-hour workday and I’ll see you back here tomorrow! — Tracy I’m struck by how often the catalyst for an extraordinary life is loss. A friend of mine posts various nuggets […]
Tell Me How You’re Mighty Pandemic Edition 3.0
Well, I don’t know about you, but I could use a Chump Nation mightiness report. Hurricane Ida, Texas taking leave of its senses, month whatever of this pandemic — tell me something good. I’ll tell you something good! Remember our post this week from WishingforHappiness who is pregnant and suddenly widowed? Well, the CN bat […]
Rituals for New Lives?
Today’s Friday challenge comes from ChumpAsItIs. She writes: My story is the same as many others, more than 20 years of marriage, ex-husband stepped away, did not know whether he wanted to stay with me, said he loved me but needed some time to think, you know, the usual tale. He was able to make me unknowingly […]
Rewrite Your Story?
Hi Chump Lady, D-Day 1 for me was in 2013. He was sleeping with a colleague; she was a divorce attorney in the midst of a divorce with another divorce attorney. They were “in love” and she was “amazing” and I would “really like her” if I weren’t so “jealous.” I pick-me-danced and “won” three […]
Financial Freedom from a FW
Dear Chump Lady, I was sent to your blog during my horrible divorce from a cheating husband back in 2016. While he hadn’t been particularly engaged in family life during our marriage, when the divorce proceedings started he became outright abusive. Even though we were married for 10 years, have two amazing kids and a […]
A Chump Declaration of Independence
Overthrowing tyrants? Boldly striking out to chart a new life? Chumps have Independence Day down. Today I’m rerunning this proclamation by CN member KibblesNBits. Please add your amendments and revolutionary fervor in the comments. Have a happy (observed July 4) holiday everyone and VIVA la independence! Dear Chump Lady, In honor of what will be yet […]
Leave a Cheater, Change Your Surroundings
Today’s Friday challenge is a riff on yesterday’s post about selling the family home. How did you change your surroundings in your new life? Did you burn the bed linens? Throw out all the shit in their closet? (That they didn’t pick up… because of course.) Paint a wall until it sang? Speaking of freedom […]
Kick Me Out of My Funk
Hello Chump Lady, Can you give me some pearls of wisdom (or a swift kick in the pants) to get out of my funk? It’s been almost 5 years since D-day. Married for 24 years at D-day, together for 26, almost 30 years together at divorce. I found out (for sure) Yahoo was cheating from […]
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