I created this site not just to offer an alternative to the Reconciliation Industrial Complex, but to lampoon the pomposity of cheaters. And there is nothing sillier, no deeper vein of humor, than someone trying to defend the indefensible.
That’s why bad actors have to torture their syntax, speak in high-falutin’ vagaries, smother their verbs, and otherwise mangle the English language.
Direct sentences would reveal actual intent. So bullshit artists resort to mindfuckery. You can’t understand it? I’m sorry, I think you lack sophistication.
Wednesday’s UBT was chock full of this sort of wackadoodle misdirection and faux erudition. Esther Perel has made an entire career of it. (“Quests for aliveness” doesn’t have quite the same ring to it as “paternity test your children.”)
So today’s Fun Friday Challenge is to share with CN the best word salad your cheater delivered. Extra points for run-on sentence fragments.