Dear Chump Lady, My ex-wife (20-year marriage) went to my therapist. (Chump that I am, I recommended that the cheating ex-wife use my therapist to save money because she knew the story.) Now she wants me to go to a meeting with her this coming Monday the 14th! Therapist called, told me it was about finding […]
The Pretzel Logic of the 180
If you’ve spent any time reading the reconciliation literature, you’ll notice a lot of reference to the “180.” She won’t stop seeing her affair partner? “Do the 180!” He still works with his ho-worker? “Do the 180!” What is this powerful 180? It was a concept developed by Michelle Weiner-Davis of “Divorce Busters.” The 180 […]
UBT: Gottman’s ‘Reviving Trust After an Affair’
Yesterday, when we discussed Gottman’s The Four Horseman as an instrument of cheater mindfuckery, an alert chump sent me further reading on the Gottman’s. Apparently they were gods of relationship research and then seem to have veered off the rails into full blown Reconciliation Industrial Complex madness. I give you this sales and marketing pamphlet, “Reviving […]
UBT: “Your Cheating Spouse Is the Victim, NOT You!”
Oh hey, were we talking about DARVO this week? (Deny, attack, reverse victim offender.) Do I ever have a heaping pile o’ mindfuckery for you today. Introducing Reconciliation Industrial Complex therapist quack, Dr. Robert Huizenga. A chump on his mailing list sent me his super special offer to Save My Marriage from my imaginary trauma. […]
Why Blame the Chump?
Dear Chump Lady, Why are these so called experts so rabid about blaming chumps for their part in creating a situation where they got betrayed? Can’t they just admit that cheaters are sick fucks? Ugh. I loved my ex-husband and he knew it. I did the whole forgiveness thing and he acted remorseful and ultra […]
UBT: He Blew Up the Marriage to Improve It
A submission here from “Deaun” to the Universal Bullshit Translator that was too fucked up to pass over. According to my counselor [the affair] was a subconscious way of blowing up our marriage to improve it. It was physiological, my brain enjoyed the dopamine. I’m assuming from the “my brain enjoyed the dopamine” Deaun is the […]
Grieving the Affair Partner and Other BS
Here’s a Reconciliation Industrial Complex trope that can die in ignominy — chumps being patient as their cheater “grieves” the affair partner. Ain’t that special? What sort of quack gives license to the mope-fest that is the tragic loss of cake? “Oh, if you reconcile, you must show love and understanding to your partner right […]
Apologize to Your Cheater, Says RIC Quack
In my inbox this morning was a note from the publicist of Andrew G. Marshall, British “therapist”. Hello Tracy, I saw your article about infidelity “7 Idiotic Things Cheaters Say, and How to Respond” and wanted to share with you the exclusive interview with the UK’s most famous relationships therapist Andrew G. Marshall who reveals […]
The OW Recommends a Self-Help Book
Hi Chump Lady! I wrote to you over the holiday’s, detailing how my cheating EX got cheated on by his mistress and how karma, completely un-looked for at this stage, caught up with him. WELL….Today I received a package (at my office!) from the EX mistress with an “inspirational book” and a letter from the […]
UBT: “Blowing up the Marriage to Improve the Marriage”
A submission here from “Deaun” to the Universal Bullshit Translator that was too fucked up to pass over. According to my counselor [the affair] was a subconscious way of blowing up our marriage to improve it. It was physiological, my brain enjoyed the dopamine. I’m assuming from the “my brain enjoyed the dopamine” Deaun is the […]
- 1
- 2
- 3
- …
- 6
- Next Page »
