Jeff Bezos and Lauren Sanchez’s Twu Wuv Engagement

Bezos and Sanchez
Photo source: Lauren Sanchez Instagram

Lauren Sanchez, the thirsty side piece and Steve Tyler lookalike, got her man. It’s always a special day when a Schmoopie is elevated in status to a wifetress. (Queen Camilla, case in point.)

Who are we talking about, Tracy?

Amazon billionaire Jeff Bezos’s former side chick, now fiancee. They just had a big engagement party and all the Fabulous People were there. Oprah, Kim Kardashian, Chris Rock, miscellaneous moguls, supermodels… you know, the usual glitterati.

Because when you’re marrying your affair partner, you need all the impression management you can get. It takes celebrities, goopy speeches, and a 30-carat engagement ring to frost that turd.

Wait! Lauren Sanchez isn’t an affair partner! And Jeff Bezos isn’t a cheater! They just had perfectly choreographed divorces and THEN met each other!

I’m sorry to burst your carefully crafted timeline. Remember that whole National Enquirer phone hacking scandal? And Bezos’s cringey I will not be blackmailed! Medium post, where he bravely did not exactly admit to an affair, but took great umbrage about “below the belt selfies.” (They just HAPPEN, okay?!)  The New York Times reported:

The inciting event in this battle of American titans was the Jan. 28 edition of The Enquirer, which hit supermarket racks on Jan. 10, one day after Mr. Bezos and his wife of 25 years, MacKenzie, announced that they would be getting a divorce. The tabloid devoted 11 pages to the story of Mr. Bezos’ affair with Ms. Sanchez, calling it “the biggest investigation in Enquirer history!”

The Enquirer boasted that it had tracked the couple “across five states and 40,000 miles,” furtively observing them as they boarded private jets, rode in limousines and repaired to “five-star hotel hideaways.” The article was illustrated with paparazzi shots of the unwitting couple as they stepped onto a tarmac and arrived together at what the tabloid called “their beachfront love nest in Santa Monica.”

The tabloid also published amorous text messages that Mr. Bezos had sent to Ms. Sanchez. “I am crazy about you,” he wrote, according to The Enquirer. “All of you.”

All of you, Lauren. And it doesn’t matter if you’re 35% silicon. Or injected with the tears of a thousand underpaid assembly line workers. He loves YOU. Not the mother of his four children, MacKenzie, who just happened to very conveniently divorce him as the tabloids were closing in.

Who are we to doubt their love? You can tell Lauren loves Jeff because she dresses him. See the 2022 disco party. After that cowboy hat, are we doing all the Village People?

But CN, this isn’t about Jeff Bezos and his midlife crisis makeover. It’s about Lauren. And her triumphalist win of the pick me dance. DO YOU DOUBT HER FABULOUSNESS? Annie Leibovitz photographed her for Vogue. Anna Wintour signed off on this shit.

First, there was the fluff ball interview.

Bezos seems the one who has changed—and that’s by his own account. “She has really helped me put more energy into my relationships,” he says. “She’s always encouraging me: ‘Call your kids. Call your dad. Call your mom.’ And she’s also just a very good role model. She keeps in touch with people. I’ve never seen her put makeup on without calling somebody. Usually her sister.”

Hey, so what if MacKenzie quietly gives away billions to charities? Lauren calls her sister. WITHOUT MAKEUP. #rolemodel

Next, there were the photos.

I know you’re wondering what dystopian fantasy this is lifted from, but it’s just Bezos’s doomsday clock that he keeps in his Texas basement, “for the future.” Because advanced life forms are going to marvel at a mechanical timepiece. (A technology we’ve had since 1270, but hey, it’s HUGE. #Texas.)

Lauren is just daring those gears to grind her into finer silicon particles. But they don’t. Because they realize they’re in the presence of greatness.

This picture reminds me of that 60s housewife advice to greet your husband at the door wearing Saran wrap. But tin foil works too I guess. #JiffyPop

Snark fails me. When you wear your best gold lame bathrobe to the warehouse? What is this picture? There’s some sort of surfeit of doomsday clocks. But also a broom, dustpan and yoga mats. WHAT IS THIS?

You can see all the photos here at Lauren’s Instagram.

Okay, Lauren. I give up. You win Jeff Bezos. We cannot compete with your cool chick hype.

Somewhere MacKenzie Scott is writing a check to a deserving orphanage. Alone. Without Annie Leibovitz. Without makeup.  #TeamMacKenzie #rolemodel

Subscribe
Notify of

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

91 Comments
Oldest
Newest Most Voted
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
LookingForwardsToTuesday
LookingForwardsToTuesday
5 months ago

No matter how much you polish a turd ….. it is still a turd.

LFTT

RedKD
RedKD
5 months ago

You know what I love? How MacKenzie Scott is out living her best life and donating millions to educational institutions so students in local communities can attend college for free. Booo. Yah.

MotherChumperNinetyNine
MotherChumperNinetyNine
5 months ago
Reply to  RedKD

She’s my role model. I was also a 25 year wife and mom of 4. I’ve repartnered and raised my kids. Sane and steady.

FW is a titan in his field (not even in the same atmosphere as Bezos, but still…). AP, now 9 year live in, is also cheap and gross. Their life is drama drama drama…. Yuck

KADawn
KADawn
5 months ago
Reply to  RedKD

and not just that, but with a strong focus on HBCU as well, to help the racial educational disparities. https://tpinsights.com/a-year-ago-mackenzie-scott-gave-more-than-400-million-to-hbcus-heres-where-that-money-has-gone/. Although it looks like she has sort of a theme by the year, so that was for 2020; this year it looks like she’s focusing on early childhood development for many of her donations (at least those we know about).

RedKD
RedKD
5 months ago
Reply to  KADawn

Yes! She donated 30 mil to the college where I work. It was life changing for our students, and for the longest time, her stipulation was that she could not be identified.

KADawn
KADawn
5 months ago
Reply to  RedKD

RedKD: that is AMAZING! I’m so thrilled for your college and students!!!!!!!

VulcanChump
VulcanChump
5 months ago

Proof that money doesn’t buy class – and for what it’s worth, there are plenty of ladies who have a strong jawline who are perfectly ethical.

Mehitable
Mehitable
5 months ago
Reply to  VulcanChump

Yeah but……she does look like Steven Tyler, LOLOLOLOL!

Daughterofachump
Daughterofachump
3 months ago
Reply to  Mehitable

Huh. Bad cosmetic surgery maybe?

WalkawayWoman
WalkawayWoman
5 months ago
Reply to  Mehitable

Except Steven Tyler’s lips are natural! Lol.

Spinach@35
Spinach@35
5 months ago

Can we picture Jeff Bezos in high school? I’m guessing he was the nerdy kid who couldn’t get a date. Think Bill Gates.

When these types get money and power, the flirty women flock and they decide that their dicks should now call the shots. Exit women of substance (Mackenzie and Melinda) and enter people like Lauren Sanchez.

Imo, it’s pathetic.

My own ex falls into the category of nerdy guy in hs and college. After med school, with that little bit of money and authority as an MD, he started garnering the attention of nurses and drug reps. It went to his little head. He actually gave as an excuse for the affair: “She flirted! What was I supposed to do?” Gee. Let me think…

susie lee
susie lee
5 months ago
Reply to  Spinach@35

I think this is a big issue with so many men once they get some power. The floozies come out of the alley.

Yes I know women cheat, but I am just addressing men and power now.

OHFFS
OHFFS
5 months ago
Reply to  Spinach@35

Mine too. I was his first ever girlfriend. I now call him Attila the Nerd.

Hell of a Chump
Hell of a Chump
5 months ago
Reply to  Spinach@35

I was the nerdy kid. Not quite as nerdy or smart as little “Leonid” the local uni physics professor’s son but we were both the main scapegoats in third through seventh grade. I went through the classic transformation by the end of high school and of course turned into a social butterfly in college. I went through the serial monogamy stage of dating all the fancy dudes before marriage but one at a time and no “monkey branching.”

I’ve read that former bullying victims can develop a particular type of self-consciousness which can be mistaken for narcissism but the experience shouldn’t induce actual personality disorders or character problems unless there were other factors and family influences. My remaining “quirk” from having been violently bullied is not leaving the house with a hair out of place. But I don’t expect the same from others and I don’t judge people on shallow specs. Like most former scapegoats, I tend to have more sympathy for underdogs and outliers. Consequently, I’m pretty sure all those geeks-cum-FWs never had character to begin with because their former “geek” experiences should have actually tilted them in the other direction.

Spinach@35
Spinach@35
5 months ago

I would agree with that. Btw, I want to be clear that I don’t mean to suggest that his being a bit nerdy caused his cheating. A character deficit caused his cheating.

And, not that it really matters, but my ex would bristle at being described as a nerd, so I probably shouldn’t have used that adjective.

In fact, he fancied himself a very smart athlete. He felt entitled to the attentions of women because he was this huge “catch” (in his own mind). But he was socially awkward so dates were hard to come by. I think he was frustrated.

But then he went to medical school, and things changed. He learned to use his social awkwardness as a way to garner sympathy and attention. I had nurses come to me and say things like, “I love to get him to smile.”

On top of that, he now had money and power. I think it all went to his head.

Hell of a Chump
Hell of a Chump
5 months ago
Reply to  Spinach@35

Human capacity for delusion seems to be endless. It always baffles me how people with a lot of power and money can count the extra-special attention and consideration they get as no more than a reflection of their God-given specialness. Maybe it’s not such a fun thing to think about but I’ve known people born into great wealth and status who were tormented about who in their lives actually liked them as individuals and who was there for the ride. Painful as those doubts might be, considering them is almost touching and admirable compared to the usual entitlement.

susie lee
susie lee
5 months ago

And it is painful to realize that those of us who were with them when they had nothing and helped them build something were tossed aside for someone else.

Conchobara
Conchobara
5 months ago
Reply to  Spinach@35

I see this as at the root of FW’s cheating too (exacerbated by p0rn, natch). I’ve seen pics of him in middle school, high school, and college: coke bottle glasses, cystic acne, thin as a rail, dressed like an old man. When I met him, he had discovered men’s clothing stores and filled out a bit. But I was his first girlfriend, at 27 (him) and 26 (me). We were each other’s *firsts*, too. I’d dated and he never had. He’d never even kissed a girl. Fast forward 15 years or so and he’s making a good living as a nurse, he (we) have some disposable income, live comfortably middle class, have a child…and he decided to go make up for all that time when he was the ugly duckling by blowing up everything we built over 21 years.

Spinach@35
Spinach@35
5 months ago
Reply to  Conchobara

“…and he decided to go make up for all that time when he was the ugly duckling”

Yep. It’s what they do. And they feel 100% entitled!

CurlyChump
CurlyChump
5 months ago
Reply to  Spinach@35

I’m pretty sure this was Tiger Woods’ excuse for his prolific cheating as well.

Orlando
Orlando
5 months ago

Lauren Sanchez understands the assignment: look like a showpiece, perform like a showpiece & make Bezos look good. Nothing more. He isn’t Mackenzie Scott’s type of real sturdy man anymore & she’s well-rid of him.

Cam
Cam
5 months ago
Reply to  Orlando

The crazy part is she doesn’t even make him look good!

KADawn
KADawn
5 months ago

#TeamMackenzie, always and forever. This is cringy as hell.

Spoonriver
Spoonriver
5 months ago

So what does she do besides pose for photos and make phone calls? Oh wait she applies makeup. What ever will she do once she runs out of places inject and fill?

Jeff is a joke and McKenzie awesome. You lost Jeff.

KatiePig
KatiePig
5 months ago
Reply to  Spoonriver

She’s already run out of places. She’s hit that line where you start to look like a circus freak.

Helen Reddy
Helen Reddy
5 months ago
Reply to  KatiePig

Right?

Elizabeth Lee
Elizabeth Lee
5 months ago

A. I love MacKenzie Scott. She’s good people.

B. I wonder how much money Lauren Sanchez has spent at the plastic surgeon. I figured she was 15-20 years younger, but no. She’s 53 and he’s 59.

C. Sanchez and Bezos deserve each other.

Josh McDowell
Josh McDowell
5 months ago

I find it fascinating that both cannot accept that they are aging like everyone else, you see it with all the surgery, lifting, diet, etc. Frankly, it’s gross.

Last edited 5 months ago by Josh McDowell
Hell of a Chump
Hell of a Chump
5 months ago
Reply to  Josh McDowell

I think a lot of celebs use tweakments and psychotic fitness routines to compensate for unhealthy party lifestyles. You can always tell because they look like roidy filler-Frankensteins (like Bezos and Sanchez). But I don’t mind some of the more scientifically sound systemic longevity stuff that the rich, famous or athletically gifted publicly share. Obviously because careers can depend on health and fitness, these folks often have access to the most cutting edge information and it’s rather nice of them to give it away. Some of it’s woo bs but some of it’s very accessible and clearly effective. For instance, things like sunscreen, fitness science and nutritional advancements probably explain why some today– even without cosmetic intervention– look half the ages of same-age people from the 1950s. And the effects obviously extend beyond looks (Tom Brady’s seven Superbowl wins, Halle Berry beating diabetes, etc).

Like many parents of disabled children put it, I have to stay around for my disabled middle child and can’t afford to get sick or die so I admit to paying attention and adopting some of the scientifically evidenced stuff.

Magnolia
Magnolia
5 months ago

Now I want to know what kinds of info you’re talking about, HOAC!

Hell of a Chump
Hell of a Chump
5 months ago
Reply to  Magnolia

My son’s been on the ketogenic diet for ten years because it’s been used for more than a century to reduce seizure risks. 100 years ago, no one understood why the low-carb, sugar-free diet reduced grand mal seizures, but recent peer reviewed research associates the effect with two things: general anti-inflammatory effects coupled with improvement to gut flora. If you follow health science, the new revolution in medicine regarding a massive range of chronic health conditions from cancer to Alzheimer’s to rheumatoid arthrisis is all about the “microbiome.”

In any event, the diet was instantly successful in reducing my son’s pre-seizure syndromes. Probably because it’s just easier for everyone in the family to eat the same things rather than making separate meals, the other kids and I eventually started eating the same way. Then we started taking the same nutritional supplements that my disabled son has taken since the age of three after I noticed he was the only one who didn’t get super sick during flu season.

We were all doing this at the same time that people like Halle Berry were talking publicly about using keto for diabetes and sports figures like the 100 mile world champion runner went public with keto diet as a means of faster injury recovery. Consequently, we were discovering a lot of the touted benefits are actually true and a lot of the (junk food industry-sponsored) pans of the diet are nonsense at the same time the diet started becoming more popular. Our traditional family physician was very skeptical of the diet at first (except for my disabled son, since this is accepted practice). But she apparently went to a bunch of conferences, is now on the diet herself and recommends it for all her patients with chronic inflammatory conditions. We joke that we’re starting a “cult.”

The benefits for my son who has a cellular metabolic disorder have been very profound but the rest of us have also seen significant benefits. For instance, I trashed my knees repeatedly as a kid in dance and figure skating and went through four knee operations before the age of 19 because of a Q-line disorder. Basically I’ve lived with chronic pain for most of my life and, just for fun, developed an inflammatory autoimmune condition as an adult that made the pain and inflammation worse. Then all my kids developed severe food and chemical allergies that sometimes led to ER visits and all sorts of mayhem. But after we started keto, the kids’ allergic sensitivity reduced dramatically and my knee pain improved exponentially. It was actually shocking. Not one ER event since the diet. Plus I’d always assumed I’d end up with a disability but, instead, I started taking dance classes again. Then there were other weird bonus effects like my blood pressure dropping to that of an eight year old and, weirder stlll, my shoe size reverting to pre-pregnancy. Compared to the other systemic benefits of the diet, the noticeable anti-aging effects are merely icing on the cake. Those effects are bizarre. I do wear sunscreen but, at 45, I should realistically have crow’s feet.

I’m not sure keto explains the entire effect since the kids and I also take a mass of supplements like CoQ10, high dose D3, etc., as anti-inflammatory strategies. It may not be for everyone but for those with autoimmune or any type of inflammatory health issues, I think keto can definitely improve quality of life. Furthermore, it turns out that cravings for sugary, processed or high carb foods are a result of the blood sugar roller coaster effect. Once you remove that stuff, there’s a markedly reduced attraction to those foods, even for kids. At most, my three teen kids all carry around packets of “miracle berry” tablets or dried fruit and then just order lemon wedges in restaurants to make sugar-free lemonade but never ask for candy, never order desert and none have had a single cavity.

susie lee
susie lee
5 months ago

Interesting. We adopted my late brothers dog, and he was having seizures. His vet said they could be caused by anxiety, or any number of other issues. Vet suggested we don’t treat him, as the seizures were short, and he wasn’t hurting him self or us. He doesn’t fall or pass out, just presents anxiety and backing himself in circles. And he is so small, if he did fall, it wouldn’t hurt him.

When the vet did his blood work up, all he showed was slightly elevated sugar, so we put him on a low carb script diet. In a few months he stopped the seizures. That lasted for a year, and he only recently had one. But, even if it helped him have fewer seizures that is a win.

Hell of a Chump
Hell of a Chump
5 months ago

Oh, btw, during his affair, one of FW’s main DARVO complaints was about how he was tired of the “crunchy” diet that the kids and I ate. He said it made him sick. It seemed like such an insane thing to complain about because that diet had finally ended the all-night seizure vigils that we’d regularly suffered through for years. I held my ground and told him to go to McDonald’s if he didn’t like eating with the family.

After D-Day when I got my hands on the “secret affair credit card” bills, it became clear that FW and his alcoholic AP lived on crappy bistro food, booze and junk food. Furthermore, one of the traumatic discoveries after D-Day is that FW had sent the AP to our family dentist so that both could get “his and hers” root canals. Also, while the kids and I became generally healthier (save for the stress-related weight loss I experienced during the affair), FW and the AP both bloated up and looked like shit on a stick.

Anyway, “crunchy diet” now has the added glow of feeling like a rebellion against FWittery.

Magnolia
Magnolia
5 months ago

Thank you!

Hell of a Chump
Hell of a Chump
5 months ago
Reply to  Magnolia

Lest I forget! Another health tip is that the powerful anti-inflammatory “rezveratrol” content in Malbec wine (look up mainstream findings on Pubmed) is particularly high and remains high even when all the alcohol is cooked off. I do a vegetable stir-fry with wine and homemade chicken stock most nights because it’s supposed to help with allergies (kids) and arthritis (me). But we use only organic Malbec because, as we discovered the hard way, the sulfites in conventional wine are major triggers for interstitial cystitis (ouch) and allergic asthma.

susie lee
susie lee
5 months ago

Do you mean organic Malbec wine, or is there just a substance called malbec that you can order. I could only find soaps and body products using “organic malbec” to search.

Hell of a Chump
Hell of a Chump
5 months ago
Reply to  susie lee

Amazon doesn’t sell Malbec. Try organic wine exchanges like this one: https://organicwineexchange.com/product/inkarri-malbec/ You can also ask local liquor stores to order something affordable like Santa Julia which is organic from Mendoza.

susie lee
susie lee
5 months ago

Thanks for info.

Hell of a Chump
Hell of a Chump
5 months ago
Reply to  susie lee

Hi Susie Lee. I order organic Malbec wine and use it for stir fry, coq au vin and beef stew because heat doesn’t kill the medical benefits. Apparently Malbec grapes contain the most rezveratrol in the skin. Lately I’ve noticed that some supposedly organic wines disappointingly list “sulfite” warnings on the label. It must be a new loophole. But most organic vintners don’t add sulfites. Because sulfites are so allergenic and inflammatory, I imagine this negates the many reported positive effects of rezveratrol.

MotherChumperNinetyNine
MotherChumperNinetyNine
5 months ago

Creepy as fuck.

Squeaks
Squeaks
5 months ago

I don’t believe I’ve ever seen a more polished expression of dong-smacked total vapidity than the one repeated in every photo in this series. Congratulations on your acquisition of the sparkliest of turds, Lauren. May you both get all the happiness you deserve.

Cam
Cam
5 months ago
Reply to  Squeaks

I know social media is a dumpster fire to begin with, but my god, her entire Instagram is an altar to narcissism.

UXworld
UXworld
5 months ago

Music by Steely Dan, lyrics by Chump Nation

(to the tune of Peg)

We see her pictures
On Instagram and TikTok
Amidst the doomsday gears
And picturesque frontiers
And so she vamps for the camera
But no one really wants it, Jeff

She calls her sister
Without a hint of makeup
Her lips are full and firm
It’s all that Juvederm
And so she vamps for the camera
Then blows you in the tractor

Jeff
You know you traded down
Jeff
You know you traded down
She’s a creepy moll
She makes us all queasy
We all much prefer McKenzie

You can’t resist her
She dresses you in disco
She gets her ego bits
From Annie Liebowitz
And so she vamps for the camera
And you ain’t any better

Jeff
You know you traded down
Jeff
You know you traded down
She’s a creepy moll
She makes us all queasy
We all much prefer McKenzie

Viktoria
Viktoria
5 months ago
Reply to  UXworld

Really good!

DrChump
DrChump
5 months ago
Reply to  UXworld

UX Next Chumpapalooza I will bring my guitar and we will have to preform some of these. Perhaps inbetween stories. We can get some of the other chumps to sing

Hell of a Chump
Hell of a Chump
5 months ago
Reply to  DrChump

I will cross hell and high water to be there for it if that happens. 😉

OHFFS
OHFFS
5 months ago
Reply to  UXworld

Love!

Elsie_
Elsie_
5 months ago
Reply to  UXworld

So good. Nailed!

Magnolia
Magnolia
5 months ago
Reply to  UXworld

👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

I love how I can always totally hear the song in my head!

chumpion
chumpion
5 months ago

MacKenzie is so amazing. Such a great role model.

Shadow
Shadow
5 months ago

What we need is Caroline Aherne to come back as Mrs. Merton and ask Ms. Wide-Mouthed Frog “What was it that attracted you to the billionaire Jeff Bezos?”

susie lee
susie lee
5 months ago

Please this shit will be over as soon as the plastic start to droop a bit, he will already have the next one lined up. She will take her pre-nup couple of a couple mil, and go into hiding until she gets re jiggered, so she can get another b class rich guy to leave his wife for her, or at least give her a couple years of gifts and money before he goes gets tired of her.

It isn’t like this scene hasn’t been played out hundreds of times in money land.

Daughterofachump
Daughterofachump
3 months ago
Reply to  susie lee

If they actually ever get married. But even if they don’t, he might pay her off to go away.

nlc
nlc
5 months ago

As someone whom works for one of those organizations that Mackenzie Scott has donated to, I’d wholeheartedly agree.

2xchump
2xchump
5 months ago

Oh Tracy !! The Snark! the 🎯 remarks. I laughed so hard. You find my soul and give it food and help me heal. I know Mrs former Beezos MacKenzie JUST LOST A TURD! This can’t be his first affair, this cannot be a faithful man hunted down by a silicon floozie. No way. But this silicone floozie talks, takes pictures and set up for the easy mark kill. Why even try to look innocently innocent of adultery cheating? What is good anyway. I give my shout out to MacKenzie. She and Jeff were not on the same level, they did NOT SHARE the same VALUES.Speaking as a 2x chump it is a relief to be free as is the former wife of Bill Gates. They do not rise to the same levels as human. Strapped to a lying liar that lies, tied with the cords of a monogamous marriage to a cheater
…. knowing what is happening in your intimate lives, living with being discarded or played every single day. Living with a masked man who pretends to all who see and hear them. Sitting in church, eating out, vacationing with them when their minds are with their mistresses…that is far worse than a life well lived– alone. A life of peace and dignity. The former Mrs Beezos has my heart because her Xhusband is public, arrogant and a bully. She lost NOTHING and can now be the gift to the world she was meant to be. All those rich kiss up Switzerland friends? Please MacKenzie, take notes. These are Not your friends!! Even Oprah did not take the high road. Preach but no practice.

Viktoria
Viktoria
5 months ago

Highly disturbing. Glad MacKenzie got away.

Dontfeellikedancin
Dontfeellikedancin
5 months ago

“All of you, Lauren. And it doesn’t matter if you’re 35% silicon. Or injected with the tears of a thousand underpaid assembly line workers.”

🤣 This paragraph is perfection. She looks like she’s dressed in someone’s else’s body and face, like the Edgar suit from Men in Black except it’s too tight on her. She should’ve had Paris Hilton’s role in Repo. I’ve seen porn stars with classier cosmetic surgery.

Listen, no shame if anyone here has had cosmetic procedures done for something that’s important to them; I myself had massive pregnancy injuries fixed and they call it a “tummy tuck.” Mackenzie maybe too, she’s so pretty (and yet still looks like a human), who knows (or cares) if she’s had work done. But holy cow, this Sanchez character, can you imagine the desperate need for validation that would drive someone to look/dress/pose like this on purpose?

And how old is Bezos anyway? Could it be his eyesight is failing?? His judgement, his brain in general? “All the Village People,” lol.

I don’t follow celebrity news, so thanks CL for sharing this entertaining clown show.

Mehitable
Mehitable
5 months ago

The ruling class of our society – and we DO have a class system, it’s our main problem as a society, IMO – believes in and supports adultery. Their socio-sexual mores are very different from the rest of the society because…..they can afford it – they can afford what amount to harems, and they’re also raised to be uncaring, materialistic psychopaths anyway who give fuck all about others especially children, whom many of them prey on under the guise of “charity” or “protection” (IMO). So they constantly promote or excuse adultery and promiscuity in general and have been doing so heavily and publicly at least since the end of WW2. When so many things started to go wrong. Congrats Lauren….you won one of the world’s biggest, ugliest psychopaths….hope you spend a few golden years slithering through the grass together.

hush
hush
5 months ago

This is nothing more than a Shut Up Ring. MacKenzie Scott has already been remarried and divorced for the 2nd time, so there’s no reason Bezos shouldn’t have already married Sanchez… if he wanted to! But he won’t, because he doesn’t trust her – and he definitely shouldn’t trust her!

See also:
https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZPRv63Lh6/

Last edited 5 months ago by hush
Chumpkin Pie
Chumpkin Pie
26 days ago
Reply to  hush

Omg… I logged in just to say thank you, because I saw your comment 4 months ago and have been DEVOURING Cecilia Regina’s videos, Mel Hamlett’s, and Florence Given’s ever since. Just learning how to de-center men and love myself. It took a combo of your comment specifically, tiktok, and 8 months of reading CL before I found the courage to leave my FW yesterday.

Know that you’ve changed someone’s life for the better! Thanks CL for bringing us together. Truly life saving work.

hush
hush
25 days ago
Reply to  Chumpkin Pie

You’re most welcome & thank you for telling me! Congrats on breaking free of a FW! You’ve got this!! 💖

susie lee
susie lee
5 months ago

So was she doing Vogue spreads before Bozo, or did Vogue only become interested after she and Bozo got horizontal.

SortofOverIt
SortofOverIt
5 months ago
Reply to  susie lee

I don’t think they cared about her enough to feature her until she got with Bezos, which is… gross? I guess the public is supposed to care about her because she is sleeping with a very rich guy? Really? Is that what this world is coming to?

JustWondering
JustWondering
5 months ago
  • 35% silicone

I can’t believe any of those “fabulous people” would even show up for such an event

Mehitable
Mehitable
5 months ago
Reply to  JustWondering

I think they have to. It’s probably in their “we’ll make you rich and famous” contracts with the devil.

Helen Reddy
Helen Reddy
5 months ago

I’m incredibly grateful to have had my love Jeff Bezos by my side.

#I couldn’t have done it without him
#literally
#all of me

MehnopolizeLife
MehnopolizeLife
5 months ago

“She’s always encouraging me: ‘Call your kids. Call your dad. Call your mom.’ And she’s also just a very good role model. She keeps in touch with people. I’ve never seen her put makeup on without calling somebody. Usually her sister.”

No Jeff, that’s how she avoids having sex with you.

OHFFS
OHFFS
5 months ago

😆

susie lee
susie lee
5 months ago

Also, what kind of a crap dad has to be told by his adultery partner to call his kids?

All a Blur
All a Blur
5 months ago

So she calls people to tell them she’s put makeup on? She really is a superb role model.

CurlyChump
CurlyChump
5 months ago

I was gonna say, because he still doesn’t understand that relationships require work?

hush
hush
5 months ago

💀🤣🤣🤣I cackled!!! You win the Internet today!!! 🤣🤣🤣🤣

MehnopolizeLife
MehnopolizeLife
5 months ago
Reply to  hush

Awww, thanks! 😊

newme
newme
5 months ago

I am all about a little botox around the wrinkles as I have done that, and got a little in the upper lip since I didn’t have one. I do it for myself, I don’t date and I don’t want too. But dang some of these people look so bad! Too much of a good thing I guess. I am no stunning beauty but she is not very pretty and very fake. I guarantee you, 5 years or less he will be out hunting again..

Conchobara
Conchobara
5 months ago
Reply to  newme

I don’t have anything against a few, discreet procedures if it makes a person feel better but I live in Orange County California and it’s ridiculous. It’s like LA — insane money but with fewer celebrities (think of all those Bravo shows you see the ads for. One takes place here). Fake bewbies, tans, noses, etc., everywhere you look, especially in South County (North County, where I live, are mostly lower to lower-middle class worker bees). The worst, though, are those lips. Who on earth finds those lips attractive? I was seeing a dermatologist for a skin issue and there were two doors off the lobby. One was for the people seeing the dermatologist and one was for those seeing his Physician’s Assistant. The derm saw all the women who were getting work done. The PA saw everyone else. Uniformly, every woman in that office had duck lips, tight temples/eye area, and big breasts. They weren’t especially pretty, they were like mannequins–one after another, exactly the same, just swap out the hair and nail colors.

susie lee
susie lee
5 months ago
Reply to  newme

Oh I am totally for anything that makes us feel better, but yeah there are so few examples of really good results after the first go round. I think, Jane Fonda is an example, and I think Patricia Heaton looked great, but then she went too far too.

I think razzing the OW is just for fun around here, and they can like it or lump it.

All a Blur
All a Blur
5 months ago

On the good side, I’d wager all that work she’s had done increased her gas mileage by several percent.

(And I thought she was pretty good in Brazil.)

comment image

Magnolia
Magnolia
5 months ago

It takes a village!?!

All a Blur
All a Blur
5 months ago
Reply to  Magnolia

Apparently a village made up of sheetrockers, aerodynamics engineers, silicone architects, and aluminum foil salesmen.

Last edited 5 months ago by All a Blur
OHFFS
OHFFS
5 months ago
Reply to  All a Blur

You are killing it today with the snark!

Hell of a Chump
Hell of a Chump
5 months ago

Quite sadly, MacKenzie Scott’s current marriage to school teacher Dan Jewett didn’t last but at least he’s not seeking spousal support so her mistake isn’t going to take a big bite out of her philanthropy. She seemed so happy after the separation from Bezos– like someone who’d been let out of a dank gulag after twenty years– which suggests that was a very stressful, icky marriage. But she may be a classic bleeding heart chump who just needs to ramp up her defenses a bit and polish her picker. To be honest, being trusting and gormless are rather beautiful and touching personality traits that, in a better world, would be ideal. But in this crappy world, we all need a personal “DOD” to survive. Something tells me she’s going to land on her feet in the end.

Elsie_
Elsie_
5 months ago

Just my opinion, but I don’t think he’ll marry her. He got out of the divorce relatively easy because MacKenzie was willing to take only 25% of his Amazon holdings, which was still billions of course. They didn’t have a prenup. She certainly did fine in the end despite remarrying and then divorcing again recently. This time, she had a prenup.

Lauren clearly has had a lot of “work” done on her. To me, she doesn’t look natural at this point, but the narrative is that they think the world of each other. We’ll see. When they are both in their 60’s in a decade, we’ll see where they both are.

OHFFS
OHFFS
5 months ago

In that last photo, she really could be Steven Tyler with tits. Ugh, what a hideous couple, in every possible way.
I love how he admits she nags him into being an adult. What a manbaby. I predict that if he meets something newer and sparklier, he will re-brand that as controlling.

Chumpolicious
Chumpolicious
5 months ago

Payday for her! Hopefully the wedding happens and when she divorces him she gets a nice payout. Does anyone really believe they will last and grow old together? Transactional relationship. Wish I could be more savy and shallow, then I could be a millionaire too. I hope Mackensie gets her ever after, but if not at least shes rich!

ClearWaters
ClearWaters
5 months ago

Not matter how much at MEH Mackenzie is now, I bet she is cringing in shame that she one day was married to Bezos and gave her children such an idiotic father. At least my children are not subject to public shaming by a fluff ball crawling all over their father.

I wonder if there are studies about the impact of money and power on the brain.

cbanks1985
cbanks1985
5 months ago

I don’t understand why it’s never ever an upgrade?

Chumpkin Pie
Chumpkin Pie
26 days ago
Reply to  cbanks1985

Ooh Cecilia Regina 275 on TikTok covers this well with her recent video on Beyoncé and Jay Z, and about Gone Girl. Basically it’s all about ego and not actually the value or worthiness of the AP. Nick chooses the young student because he gets to feel smart and superior, since she doesn’t know as much about the world because she’s young. Doesn’t matter that his wife is Amazing Amy: beautiful, financially generous with him, intelligent, sexy. Same with Jay Z because there’s no one better than Beyoncé in her field. He cheated on Beyoncé for the ego boost and to throw her off balance, keep her humble.

A person who relies on the world to feel big will seek downgrades because they can’t handle the amazing partners around them. They need the people around them to be smaller than them or to pay them obeisance in order to feel good about themselves.