Her Ex Continues to Blow Up His Life
Her ex continues to blow up his life, while she’s grateful every day that she left the cheater. Her Tuesday advice on how it gets better.
***
Dear Chump Lady,
Why write this? Because laughing at ChumpLady’s creative profanities and hearing other Chump stories got me through the darkest days.
Yesterday I got a phone call from my ExFW’s boss/friend. Yup, the guy my kid’s dad works for.
He said “FW strikes again” in a heartbroken voice.
Turns out my sober, in-recovery, group-attending, seemingly healthy and affable co-parent had an affair with his (friend)/boss’s wife.
The dumbfuckery is staggering. We’ve been divorced over a year (I had my FINAL D-Day 2 years ago when he had an affair with my best friend) and now he can have ALL of the girlfriends and one-night-stands on ALL the apps if he wants! But no, he decides to shoot himself in both feet, and go after his employer’s wife. (The boss is well-respected in the town and will make damn sure FW never gets a job anywhere in town ever again.)
I am so sad. So angry. And so relieved.
Sad because ANOTHER family is blown up. (3rd? 4th?) Yet another friend group is experiencing the unsettling repercussions of being deceived (trust broken in any community maligns the connections that hold it all together!)
Angry because my kids have no choice in who their dad is. They didn’t ask for this. Now they can never go hang out at Boss’s pool and fancy house. No more cookouts and fireworks with Boss’s friend group.
Livid because the consideration of caring for his kids was not enough to prevent his cancerous selfishness.
And I am so fucking relieved to not be in the middle of his shitstorm.
Of course I want to scream at him! But I won’t. I’m not touching his shit anymore. Instead, after the (very triggering) phone call, I cried in my friend’s office. I messaged my support group and called my therapist. I called my boyfriend (more on him later…) and I finished the workday.
Not only am I not taking responsibility for FW’s actions, they also don’t have power to overturn my world anymore!
And that peace — Oh that peace – that calm that can exist WITH the sadness and anger is AMAZING. Like — bliss. PEACE AND CALM. I have FREEDOM from his gaslighting, emotional abuse, and lies. I don’t wonder if I’m crazy anymore or have persistent life-sucking depression because I don’t feel wanted or appreciated as a spouse. It was never about finding and proving what he did or didn’t do. It was never about climbing the Mt Everest of untouched FOO issues.
Finally, it was answering and facing the simple questions:
- Am I happy? (No.)
- Do I feel wanted? (No.)
- Do I trust him? (No.)
And allowing those three No’s to be enough to leave. MY answers to those questions were ENOUGH to (finally) leave. I am responsible for my happiness and my health. I am responsible for taking care of my body, my mental, emotional, financial, and spiritual health to be the sanest parent possible. My heart is broken because my kid’s dad seemed to be “doing better”. I still want my kids to have the best possible relationship with him. But I can only control me. Distance from him is amazing.
But it gets better.
That Peace and calm you can create is priceless. The atmosphere that I can create with my kids in our apartment is beautiful. (Of course it’s not easy! – I’m a single parent of a 6 and 10 year old who works full time, commutes several days a week with no family in town to help me out! It’s hard AF!) But it’s My Hard. My stressors are my bills. (No more surprise empty checking account!) My stressors are my physical exhaustion, making meals, traffic, and kid’s emotions.
What they’re not: not walking on eggshells, not discovering a DM that makes me puke, not having that tingling suspicion he’s talking to another one of my friends or wondering if he’s lying to my face! It’s not barely living because I am so tired from the emotional toll induced by his deception and caustic cruelty. I was an accessory (er, appliance), not a wife. It took me 15 years to realize it, but I am grateful for facing that pain today.
And it gets even better…
I am currently dating a wonderful man who values, respects, and cares for me.
Opening up to love again is nothing short of terrifying and miraculous – but finding intimacy in trust and mutual respect is HOT. (Sex is UN-be-lievable – I cannot say that more emphatically! – with a partner who isn’t porn-numbed or fantasy-fucking someone else!) Seriously, you should try it. 10/10 recommend.
Finding a partner who is kind and silly and curious — simply the best. A partner who asks “What can I do?” after that triggering phone call and then brings over Panera and Crumbl Cookie for me and the kids and we all swim in the pool and are silly and laughing until my face hurts and then later after kid bedtime we have a good rage/bitchfest about what a dumbfuck my exFW is and then we have amazing sex and then we fall asleep spooning. (Sigh)
Yea – THAT GOOD.
So if you are on D-Day #1 or D-Day #21, I’m so sorry. It is some of the worst pain that can be experienced. I had a lot of them too. (Six? Yea, I count the “emotional affairs” and the “digital only” affairs too… those were the ones I found out about, so fuck trying to get hard facts from the murky shitpond of lies he lives in…)
YOU DESERVE BETTER!
Say it in the mirror out loud looking into both pupils ESPECIALLY when you don’t believe it!
“I DESERVE BETTER!”
Tell yourself “I love you” in the mirror (especially when you don’t feel loved.) Multiple times a day. Everytime I went into the bathroom, I looked in the mirror and said “I love you” to myself. Because if I couldn’t believe myself, who could I believe?
Do the work on yourself.
What needs to be done today? What do you enjoy? In the next hour, what does your best look like? What will help You be the healthiest version of yourself?
I believe in you. Even if you don’t. You are more capable than you know.
Xo,
MyWorkMyPeace
***
Dear MyWorkMyPeace,
Thank you for the Tuesday pep talk. I think many of us here share gratitude for jumping off the crazy train when we did. As I say here a lot, people with crappy life skills tend to continue to with crappy life skills. So, yes, of course he slept with his boss’s wife. Of course your ex continues to blow up his life. As long as he HAS a life, he will create chaos. It is the Fuckwit way.
I’m glad you’re free. And took the time to guide others with this letter. I’ll leave it here and let CN bask in your mighty. Happy Tuesday everyone!
Is it weird that I envy the ex Fuckwit, you have, MWMP? I wish my ex-FW dumpsters his life as spectacularly as yours does! It would’ve made my Tuesday come a lot sooner, I think. Instead my ex continues to have things roll off his back & all good things come to him!! My kids think he’s awesome (except that they don’t like his GF- the only fly in his ointment). Sigh. No cookies & panera to celebrate him going off the rails! I know, it sucks for your kids especially & that’s sad. I likely wouldn’t want the same Fuckwit as you have if I had him either. I just hope I get an opportunity to watch my ex – at least once – have something blow up (that doesn’t include me)! I’m happy for you MWMP, thanks for sharing your Tuesday story!
Orlando, I feel I have the female version of your FW. After her affair and D-day, she acted very selfishly but still looked good to the kids. They don’t like her AP, now her “married” partner. But her? They think she’s great. Or at least she sucks up to them well. She has made some missteps, but mainly w/me, not the kids.
I don’t want her to blow her life up for the kids’ sake. If there were no kids involved? Might be another story.
All I can do is to remind myself that she is their mother, and that will never change. I have to just work on improving my life and being there for my kids, as best I can.
Fuck those fuckwits (not literally, of course). We’ve got lives to gain. What do they have? Potential lives to ruin, both theirs and their kids. I’ll take our path over theirs any day.
Good advice, Longrun! Her AP might have a surprise for her in the future too!
Wait till he gets older….sometimes a lot older. That’s when life catches up on you and you’re not fast enough to outrun it anymore with distractions. You think about what you did, what you fucked up, who you hurt, what a POS you are, and where you’re heading when you die. Even if you’re a good person, old age can be a tough time, but I think it’s worse when you’re a shit heel. Not that you’re gonna wait around contemplating him, but just keep in mind that time, death, and after life consequences come to all.
Mehitable-My second cheater has severe ED which he blamed on me. It will only get worse even with all the pumps, sprays and injections. Each wife or OW will find this out. He has familial bipolar and with any added aging brain,this will not be good. I don’t wish him harm but the writing is on the wall.
Maybe you should suggest a transplant to him………
Haaa..can’t with No Contact! He’ll figure it out…maybe..Thanks Mehitable! Are you meh yet?
Yep. My loser FW has reportedly gone back to drinking, after doing AA and swearing umpteen times that he would never, ever drink again. I knew that wouldn’t last. Give them time and they all end up shooting themselves in the foot.
They don’t want to do the really hard work of changing. And it IS hard. Just to stop eating potato chips is incredibly hard for me. It’s my major food group (I’m sure there’s tons of vitamin c in there). But drinking and cheating…..I think the only way most of them stop is if death is the alternative. And even then that doesn’t stop them all.
OHFFS—My therapist suggested I avoid ANY relationships that require 12 steps to keep going. He mentioned my mothering tendencies, my enabling and broken wing magnet that is attached to my heart and my ability to be loyal through abuse and falling off all the wagons. Said that sleeping with anyone for a few years needed to be off the table so i could heal from years of harm. Sex connected me and keeps me. He said none of that. I’m so far doing great and feel better than I have in 15 years. Truly the man is a genius of recovery for people like me.
Wow, that is really great advice – there are geniuses in every field and it sounds like you hit the one in counseling!
He’s the one who saw my cheater once…saw me 3 days later and told me to get out now! He works with sex offenders in prisons and knew their type. I listened .
Thanks, Mehitable. I’m definitely not waiting around for a FW to implode! I’m busy here gaining… NO, having a life! ☺️
MWMP – I’m able to be no contact with ex-FW since we don’t have children together and I chose to step away from his friends and family. I have no idea how he is doing.
But I do know he can’t impact how I’m doing.
Your focus on yourself and your children, your job and your day was the thoughtful work necessary to avoid more damage. And, hopefully, you’ve insulated your children with your sane parenting.
It’s hard to measure anyone’s real happiness or success. Your ex appears to be visibly imploding – changing the narrative on cheating and bringing chumps a shared gratification.
This letter made me smile! Especially the “and it gets even better” section about her happiness with her new man….
For me the most inspiring, relatable line in the letter is, “That peace and calm that you can create is priceless. The atmosphere that I can create…. is beautiful.”
It really is inspiring and beautiful. SMILES!!!
Thanks. This gives me hope! (Crumbl is something I’ve had to reclaim since D-Day-I used to bring it to my FW “when things were good”-I have to watch in a Hector Barbossa-like glaze-type 2 and everything.)
This may be some of the best “Trust that they suck” I’ve ever seen. This dipshit keeps upping the ante, aren’t they?
I want to believe that I was my FW’s last victim and that she is correcting her life’s path. Sadly I imagine it’s going to be more implosive-like this. But hey, I will never no! No contact is great!
Have a Trauma-Free Tuesday!
Nah, she’ll fuck up again. They don’t change, they just lose energy.
I’m bookmarking this one. I am deeply grateful for you writing in and sharing. Thank you Tracy for posting this. My spirits are lifted and I thank you.
Traitor Ex has recently begun going to AA meetings in town. My meetings. The meetings I have gone to regularly since we moved here in 1992. The meetings he literally and barely ever went to, and literally when he did he only went with me. Never ever on his own. The meetings he told our ten year old daughter he was going to when I was out of town and he needed an excuse to go hook up and he left her home alone by herself and she didn’t have a phone. And she knew he was lying about going to a meeting because she knew even as a child that he had never ever gone to a meeting on his own.
Last year he and the Craigslist cockroach (who is a sex worker he met in an illicit massage parlor) bought a piece of commercial property and opened an illicit massage parlor. Local LE is building a case. I’ve been cooperating with all the various LE agencies and NGO’s.
And he’s claiming to be sober, and he’s going to meetings, and putting his phone number on the phone list so a newcomer can call him for help. Yep, he’s Mr Recovery now.
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
He is as full of shit as the sky is blue. My trusted friends in the very same recovery community know the facts about him from me. Traitor Ex isn’t even smart enough to pick a fresh audience to sell his bullshit to.
There are plenty of backyards he can shit in, but he can’t resist the impulse to shit all over his own (and mine). Repeatedly.
I can honestly say I could not be more grateful to be divorced from him.
Just an idea I’ll throw out at you – do you think (with all his skeezy shit being looked at) that this could be his way of checking up on you and seeing what you’re talking about or who you’re talking to? I can’t imagine being in the same group with this man – or him wanting to be with you. Frankly, I don’t think it should be allowed in that group.
Isn’t him going to your meetings unethical – wouldn’t that be like some kind of violation of the group policies? How are you supposed to recover if this asshole is sitting there with you? There must be other groups he can go to, even in a neighboring town. That sounds really really wrong.
We have lots of meetings where I live and he’s not always at one I am at. He’s just like a chair in the room to me. I decided I am going to go where I want, stay or leave if I want, share what I want to share. He’s the one who should feel like the outsider, not me. Other than that, you can’t control who comes to a meeting unless they are being disruptive or overtly attacking someone.
….and of course one of the other things, the many things, I found out he was lying about after DDay was his sobriety….
The backstabbers with the Nice Guy/Gal facade are the worst of the worst, much worse than the obvious up-front batterers. IMHO
Cheaters lie to you to anesthetize and immobilize you and then they use the most painful weapon in the toolbox on you. And they step aside so the side piece can have a go.
No one will ever convince me that staying with someone who does this to you is a good idea.
Oh brother. I imagine he is making the most of it by enjoying a spot of 13th stepping as well.
I did get to laugh in his face after we were both in a meeting where the topic was honesty….
😛
VH – I wonder if the tendency of FW’s to circle back should inform divorce agreements following cheating. Perhaps the normal template should protect a chump’s safe places – their homes, churches, athletic fields, meetings.
Good point! I think it will be easier to draw those legal lines once coercive control is more widely legislated against and post-separation abuse and persistent turf incursions/territory creep like this are understood to be typical in CC.
It is amazing to read how this guy continues to fuck up his life over and over again. He should become a demolitions expert….except he’d blow up the wrong thing. This is a man with so little self control that he can’t even heed the basic saying of “Don’t shit where you eat”. I guess he just takes a dump wherever he wants like a baby and leaves it for others to clean up. There is no excuse for this, not even an attempt at it, no purpose in understanding or explaining it. I think this is someone people just have to be warned about. Hopefully boss will fire him and tell everyone else. Sorry if this makes your child support more difficult, but I guess that was inevitable. One point I would emphasize personally is that I would make sure, age appropriate, that my children understood what Dad is REALLY like. Not just a pleasant jolly fellow or whatever image he presents, but a real complete nasty unreliable fuckup. Because if they rely on him too much as they get older…he will fuck them up too. Anyone who would do this repeatedly to people close to him, including how he makes his living, will do this to his kids and other “loved ones” too. Kids should be aware of what a loser dad is. I know this is tricky to handle but I probably would say something like….I know you love your dad but I don’t want you to be disappointed in him because he is not always reliable and doesn’t keep his word. Unfortunately he doesn’t seem to change in this respect so I would not expect much from him.” Just to avoid as much devastation as you can down the road. Low expectations can be a good thing. Avoidance is even better but that’s not always possible. So glad you are making a good life for yourself and that you don’t feel sorry for this asshole. KEEP IT UP!
“He’d blow up the wrong thing” 😂
I know we say “don’t try to figure them out” but it’s my nature, lol. My guess is this guy is a natural risk taker who does stupid things for thrills to see how much he can get away with. Well, he better not dodge trucks on the highway because his timing is off.
Yay, time to repost the “addicted to betrayal” scene from Six Feet Under: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u2hi5xhhDnQ
Brenda (caught cheating): “I was honest with you in the beginning, I have an issue.”
Joe: “Oh blah blah fucking psycho bullshit. It’s not sex, it’s betrayal. That’s your fucking addiction.”
The skein is pretty easy to untangle when it comes to combo FW/mate poachers who clearly can only get their rocks off if sex involves triangulation and victim hypotenuses.
I guess there must be some need for drama there that I just don’t get personally. I run from drama The closest I get to drama voluntarily is the latest anime. They must feed off this shit.
I think drama may just be a side effect of or even a tool in service of the need for control due to whatever attachment disordered rage these characters tend to harbor towards people close to them, particularly intimate partners who won’t stay on script and keep insisting on being, you know, independent beings with their own thoughts, feelings, interests and needs.
Congrats on making it to Tuesday!!! Thanks for sharing your story. Sorry to hear about your kids dad. It’s hard to watch your children be affected by their dad’s selfish behavior. They are lucky to have you as their sane parent. Keep rocking it!
A very long time ago, I’d lost 30 lbs on Weight Watchers, and my group leader suggested to me that I should go into a grocery store and lift a 30-lb sack of dog chow or cat litter — just so I could get the feel for what I used to carry around, that I don’t have to carry any more.
I think of that a lot when my daughter calls me in a rage over XFW’s latest dysfunctional life catastrophe. It’s a weight I’m NOT carrying any more. He can’t manage money? Gosh, what a shame. He’s feuding with various family members? Aww. He lost ANOTHER job? Not my problem.
There are fun divorce cakes on the internet that say things like “Congratulations on Losing 175 Pounds!” (as applicable). You’re right, getting a divorce from a chaos monkey is like having 1,000 pounds lifted from your shoulders.
Yes, jumping off the crazy train was seriously one of the best decisions of my life. Even though my head was spinning during the divorce that was supposed to be “easy” and wasn’t, the progress felt good. It helped that I had an attorney that an acquaintance called “grandpa with an iron rod.” He always knew what to do strategically and completely got the situation both with my ex and opposing counsel. And the college kids, despite being skeptical at times, had decided that I was the more sane parent and were on team mom.
My ex’s life has pretty much gone the way that both our therapist and my legal team predicted, not good. He’s reportedly in financial trouble and was paired up with a woman vastly different than me, last I knew.
My life is really about the same. I enjoy the dog we got during separation, my adult kids, my work, my friends, and the volunteering I do with struggling women. I bought a house post-divorce that is perfect for me and friends come and stay.
I couldn’t help myself. To the tune of One Less Bell to Answer by The 5th Dimension: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u2hi5xhhDnQ
One less risk of cancer
One less trauma trance
One less red flag to spackle
I should be unhappy
But all I do is dance (dance, dance, lots of laughter)
Oh I should be unhappy asking why did he go
I only know that since he left my life’s so peaceful
That I give myself a pinch
It’s so much fun
But sometimes when the phone rings
I still flinch!
I don’t know how in the world
I survived
Because I am now so alive
I end each day the way I start out
Laughing my brains out
One less shitstorm to mop up after
So much laughter
Ha ha ha
Since he plumbed the depths of hell (and cucked his boss as well)
Why didn’t he feck off (years ago)?
Now I’ve got one less Mr. Narcy Pants
And all I do is dance (yay yay)
Fantastic job.
Also if anyone is interested the song was written for Keely Smith in 1967, she did a great job on it too. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q9ksSn1Ip1o
I liked the 5D best, (better tempo) but both are fantastic.
My very favorite of Keely’s is “Wish You Love” haunting.
Anyway so much for an old lady’s ramblings.
Excellent!
MyWorkNyPeace,
How did you stop looking for hard proof or more evidence? When you referred to no longer getting facts from the murky shitpond. That’s part of where I’m stuck.
How did you finally say “no more”. Or what did it take for you to realize he is who he is and no amount of therapy would help?
Walking – My FW was not a sociopath and maybe not a narcissist. So there wasn’t overt game playing.
In retrospect, I could have set a bar where he had to meet me halfway in affection or housework or emotional work. He would have failed every time. I just kept lowering the bar.
Cover your bases, get your ducks in a row.
When they start seeming disgusting to you, interest in the details tends to turn to an “ick” reaction or just feels cold and pragmatic or like an intellectual exercise– like figuring out what assets were dissipated for cheating for the purpose of getting them back, knowing which trusted friends may have been involved in order to ditch traitors or studying red flags to avoid creeps in the future or to teach kids to do the same.
Typically a cheater/abuser is going to increasingly seem disgusting the longer you’re really and truly out of their mindfucking orbit. Finally feeling safe allows Stockholm syndrome to fade along with the distorted hologram projection of the abuser so that clear-eyed reality starts to emerge. Then they can end up looking like shifty syphilis dispensers you wouldn’t touch with a 30 foot barge pole and the transition to “ick” is complete.
I think there should be a spiritual training program focused on the transcendently liberating power of “The Ick.” The holy symbol of the Church of Ick could be one of those green barfy faces used to keep kids away from household poisons and, instead of genuflection, people would solemnly mime putting a finger down their throat. Embrace The Ick!
Walking_The_Road – all of it is hard. I didn’t want to play Relationship Police and looking for evidence drove me CrAzY. The tricky thing with disordered personalities is that they often believe their own lies/fantastical realities.
https://outofthefog.website/
When he cheated with my best friend it quickly became apparent that even in remorse – they still try to save face. Partial truths/stories not lining up. More and more I came to realize… what is my body trying to tell me? Do I feel good when I’m with him/her? Nope. Do I have video proof? DNA tests? Nope. Having to wonder no longer became an acceptable way to live. I got to the place of hoping for my kid’s sake he would actually get healthy. I still hope that. But that is his work to do.
What is acceptable/unacceptable for you?
Are you continually having to lower the bar for them?
Do you feel filled or drained (continuously) when you are with them?
Is they way they treat you how you treat others? No? (What is okay/not okay with that?)
How would you like it to be?
(((hugs)))
It takes time and distance, WTR.
It also takes self reflection and work on yourself. You’ll break free. You’ll accept the hard reality of who he is. There isn’t necessarily going to be some sudden epiphany where you are unequivocally done, though that has been known to happen to some chumps. It’s more likely that the realization will seep in over time. You’ll notice you are thinking about FW less, then still less, until you rarely think about him/her at all.
This sentence stuck out to me:
“I messaged my support group and called my therapist. I called my boyfriend (more on him later…) and I finished the workday.”
Hell yeah, like Chumps do. I think of FWs as these weak little balls of insecurity who can’t go a week without being the center of attention, even if they have to create chaos in order to do it. Chumps are hardened veterans of the game of life. Getting a FW out of your life is basically saying “You’re done. Go sit over there by yourself and make your own chaos because we adults have real shit to take care of.”
Both my cheaters are living their best life without me. And I’m living my best life without them. I am grateful they were so rancid that the smell got past my enabling, got past my loving them so much that I myself was worthless and would accept gas lighting, verbal and intimate abuse and being an appliance. I miss next to nothing about them except I get to live in the truth now instead in the shadows of porn, emotional affairs, physical affairs and thinking it was ME that drove them to the streets and OW.
My quote for Tuesday is from
Anne Lamott :
Hope begins in the dark, the stubborn hope that if you just show up and try to do the right thing, the dawn will come. You wait and watch and work: you don’t give up.
Forward to Tuesday warriors! Even without a good man in my bed,I am whole and strong. I just need a few good friends with wisdom.
Oh one more quote😊
All experience is great, providing you live through it. If it kills you, you’ve gone too far
ALICE NEEL
I needed this today.My FW seems to be unscathed in his personal and professional life. While I am sure privately people have some choice words about the 65 year old man who ditched his family for his much younger “last chance at a new life” – he’s just fine. I find people are largely transactional and if it serves their needs,FW is A-OK with them. Its disappointing.I know I need to focus on my choices, my internal compass, my precious family and let FWs choices lead him down whatever path he chose. I suspect his younger woman who helped him leave is also being transactional in her choice of him, he just doesn’t know it, yet.
He’ll surely catch glimpses of the OWife’s transactional nature when she’s changing his bedpans. Maybe more than a glimpse if he loses speech and can no longer hold a pen to scribble a desperate note to a nurse saying, “Please call my lawyer, I want to change my will!”
Yes! The peace is everything! It’s something I noticed immediately after leaving FW. I started to feel more at peace by the day.
Love your story MyWork. Of course he had to fuck his friend’s wife. He can’t get off unless he’s being transgressive and creepy. It’s a paraphilia with these scum. So hookups and single girlfriends don’t do much for him.
I guess his boss is no longer Switzerland about him. I hope that it was at least a lesson to him about keeping a cheater as a friend. Some have to learn it the hard way.
Cheers to all of YOU!… Doing the hard work, each and every day.
I went to therapy for Sooooooooooo LONG before finally walking away! There was always some juicy bit to keep me thinking THIS time it will be different (Oh he’s putting software protection on his computer… Oh he’s finally going to therapy… Oh we’re moving towns… Oh he’s finally getting his depression medicated… Oh he finally confessed on his own without me asking. Blah-dee-blah blah blugh) The shit never got better. It only got worse. Way worse.
Regarding “for the kids” –
An “intact” family (with a FW) ISN’T worth being a shell of a human. It isn’t worth the crackling tension of avoided topics or soul-siphoning suck of deception. It is hard to realize it when you’re in it for so long… but the energy is HEAVY AF when you are being lied to and manipulated. And kids can feel it!
Get out.
Get a lawyer and get the fuck out of Dodge. You WILL be able to make money. You Will be able to love and care for your kids. You Will discover just how capable you are. Your soul and spirit will heal. Play the long game. Your health = healthier relationships = healthier parenting.
xo
Love, love, love this post! MWMP is at bat for her own life and swinging for the fences – way to go!! And congrats on finding a real partner! That in itself is priceless
“And that peace — Oh that peace – that calm that can exist WITH the sadness and anger is AMAZING. Like — bliss. PEACE AND CALM.”
Yes!!! Well said. Congrats to you on your new sane life!
Too many live on the hopium they’ll change. Nope, all you do is waste your time and life you can’t get back.
The downside here is an unemployed FW can’t make child support payments.