Dear Chump Lady, My fiancee has a (married) BFF who is an ex-lover. They used to hook up whenever they were single. Early in our relationship my fiancee said that he wished he dated her, later swearing that it was just drunken rambling. The problem went away for several years because she moved far away, […]
He’s Cheating and Now ‘Needs My Help’
Hello Chump Lady, How I wish I had found you months ago. Before I had invested my time and money into “get your marriage back!” Crap. It’s been 8 months of an emotional and physical affair. We have been married 15 years, three children, youngest is 8 with special needs. I was the breadwinner for the majority […]
Being Compared with an Affair Partner
One of the classic “Stupid Shit Cheaters Say” utterances is, “You know, if you met (the Schmoopie), you’d really like (him/her)! They’re a lot like you!” Yeah, you know if the circumstances were different, and this person wasn’t fucking your spouse, I’m sure you’d really enjoy scrapbooking together. It’s a patently moronic cake fantasy come […]
Sex with the Ex WTF?
Hello Chump Lady, I feel like I am reporting to my mom after doing something horribly wrong and looking for her to tell me it will be okay. It’s been years since my ex and I broke up, we haven’t even talked, he does not see our kids at all (the OW doesn’t want him […]
She Wants Me to ‘Fight For Her’
Dear Chump Lady, I found out last week that my wife has started an affair right under my nose: she comes home one evening saying she is really sorry but did something strange with a work colleague. Of course she says she is all lost and apologetic and would never do anything else, but then […]
He Doesn’t Know If He’ll Come Home
Dear Chump Lady. He left December 5th out of nowhere. He went to work and showed up with a u-haul. He told me for weeks that he was coming home and it was just a break. He took our son and got caught out with another girl. I left him the weekend before over her. […]
Why Do Affair Partners Stalk Chumps?
Hi Chump Lady, Life is good at five years post-divorce. I haven’t talked to or seen ex since the settlement signing/final appearance in front of a judge. The few post-settlement issues have been resolved at my end by telephone court appearance, which is nice because there is no way in hell I’d be able otherwise. […]
He Says He ‘Never Went Looking for It’
Dear Chump Lady, I can’t believe I am writing this but I really need some help. 5 weeks ago I discovered my husband was having an emotional affair with a colleague. No sex. But intimate kissing and real emotional connection. They have both said they love each other. She tried to break it off and […]
Jealousy and ‘Just Friends’
Dear Chump Lady, My wife and I were having issues. It got incredibly bad. I found evidence of something going on. I got suspicious when she suddenly was wearing kits of makeup and sexy underwear, I didn’t get to see. So I accused her of cheating when I saw a message. She admitted having feelings […]
Did He Cheat Because He’s Depressed?
Dear Chump Lady, Please help me sort through this mess. Help me get angry! My husband and I were together for 6 years and married for 6 months when he fell into a deep depression and left me to stay with a friend in November. During this time (over an 11-week time span) he pushed […]
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