Recent Posts

Dear Chump Lady, How do I get over the devaluing?

Dear Chump Lady My question to you concerns extreme desexualization at the hands of a Narc and how to get over that. I really need help on this one! By most objective standards, I believe most people would describe me as good-looking — or so they tell me. Yet, 26 years with Dick Bling has […]

Dear Chump Lady, I’m struggling with no contact and kids

Dear Chump Lady, I’m stuck in an immature part of the process, but I can’t help it. I am angry and the things that my ex is doing are infuriating. He led a double life for almost two years. A wild party boy who would drink the most, and take home the easiest woman, while he […]

Ashley Madison Wants You to “Find Your Moment”

Poor Ashley Madison has gone in for some rebranding lately. After its data hack last summer, the resignation of its CEO Noel Biderman, continued controversy over its blackmail billing practices, AM is trying to soften its image. Instead of douchey men swiping right while singing “I’m looking for someone other than my wife” now we’ve […]

Dear Chump Lady, Is Affair Fog real?

Dear Chump Lady, My husband had drunk sex with a woman who works for him when our little boy was 9 months old and we had been married for just a couple of years. He was remorseful (well he cried a bit and said sorry and, hey, at least he told me — yeah right, […]

I Love You But I’m Not In Love With You

“I love you but I’m not in love with you” is classic cheater-speak. Chumps misunderstand this statement as a definitive goodbye, I’m leaving for my fuck buddy, when I really think it’s more subtle — it’s cake and impression management. Lyn asked: I was just curious about your opinion on using “I love you, but I’m […]