Dear Chump Lady, I’ve been thinking about writing to you for months but I just haven’t been brave enough… I found out in April 2020 that my husband was having an affair with a woman he worked with for 6 months. I think going into lockdown in March had driven him mad and not getting […]
Don’t Send It, Three Reasons Why
Psssst! I have a little secret to lay on you…. People are not interested in your messy divorce. Okay, maybe your parents and closest friend. Certainly it sucks for your children. But the rest of humanity? I’m sorry. They do not care for the particulars. I know how unjust this is, especially if you’ve been cheated […]
Can I Tell His Family He Cheated?
Dear Chump Lady, My STBX informed me two weeks before Quarantine Thanksgiving that we had to talk. I shut the lid of my laptop and asked, “What do you want to talk about? Do you want to watch something together?” (I was deep into an episode of something that he hated.) He said, “I want […]
Jealous of the Other Woman
Dear Chump Lady, I am sure that my story is the same one that you have heard a hundred times, I have read versions of it on your site and others… married 9 years, together 18, one small daughter and poof! He is gone. Like emotionally gone. Except that he did not physically leave. My […]
He Walked Out for OW But Doesn’t Want a Divorce
Dear Chump Lady, My story begins four years ago. My narcissist had an emotional affair with a much younger (30 years..) girl at the local amateur dramatic group. Initially, they were just ‘drawn to one another’ after acting together in a play. He started flossing, shaving, taking his phone to the bathroom and changing his […]
‘Replaced’ and Still Feels Empty
Dear Chump Lady, I was married for almost 30 years, have one now grown daughter, and I’m in my 60s. I managed to survive serial cheating and lots of other abuse. My daughter and I were immediately replaced with a new younger OW and a younger OD (other daughter) and other dog! I got back […]
What Happens to Couple Friends After Divorce?
Dear Chump Lady, I am 6 months post divorce after discovering my ex-wife’s infidelity in September 2013. This holiday season my children (12, 8) are with my ex-wife abroad with her affair partner on holiday with my ex in-laws. It sucks that my kids spend time with the man that helped break up my family […]
‘I Can’t Talk to My Kids About Their Father’
Dear Chump Lady, I am having a problem. I was chumped 5 years ago this month. I am in a good place now, remarried, etc. But my issue is — I have two teenagers and I cannot talk to them about their father. They know what happened and all that, but I cannot talk to […]
In-House Separation, She Won’t Move Out
Dear Chump Lady, Last September my wife of 17 years and 3 kids, informed me she had had an affair with the headmaster of our youngest daughter’s school. I had recognised my wife had been unhappy for some time and was asking her why, I had suggested that if it was me making her unhappy […]
What Did You Do With the Photos?
You are the curator of your own history, so I’m curious — what artifacts have stayed and what’s gone? Or is it all moldering in the back of a closet somewhere? One of the hardest things to do after a divorce and the decimation of a shared history, is go through the photos. There you […]
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